It’s been a busy two weeks for me since I published my last blog. Actually, it’s been a busy 12 months behind the scenes. You probably read in the industry publications or on LinkedIn or Facebook that my sister, Jackie and I sold our 61-year-old family business to another produce company! It was definitely a bittersweet decision, but as our mom always said, “Success came to me because I never saw obstacles.”

When my eldest daughter Alex returned from maternity leave two years ago, she came into my office. She told me that she loved the business, and wanted to work in the business, but did not want to own the business. Some would have seen that as an obstacle to the succession plan that we had, but we saw it as an opportunity.

We had many discussions with our business advisor/coach and realized there were ways to continue the legacy of our business without transitioning the ownership to the third generation.

So, we began the process of investigating options. Ultimately, we decided to retain the services of an investment banking firm. Because we recognized the value of our own company culture, we chose an investment banking firm whose culture we felt fit with our style.

The same was true when we had to select an attorney for the actual transaction portion of our journey. We interviewed several. Our final decision was to work with someone who “felt like family.”

Starting with more than 100 firms (which could have seemed like an overwhelming obstacle) that showed an interest in our company, we were thrilled that one company stood above the rest. What was most appealing about Frieda’s to them? Our strong brand and reputation, and our culture. Bingo!

So last Friday, January 20, at 7:15 am PST, we had a zoom call. All parties were on the call from both sides (the buyer and seller) plus attorneys, accountants, etc. As we started the call, I held up the photo I have on my desk so my mother, Frieda “was present.”

Framed photo of my mom, which sits on my desk

To lighten the mood, I told a produce joke! I mean, don’t you think that’s a fun way to break the ice … with a produce joke?!

Screen shot of our zoom closing call with bankers, lawyers, and us

The call lasted two minutes, and our transaction was complete! Then we began the most important part of things, and that was meeting personally with everyone in our company. Thinking about those meetings and personally telling everyone that we had recapitalized the business could have seemed like an obstacle.

My sister Jackie, my daughter Alex, and our new CEO Dan Madsen joined me in meeting with small groups of our team members. We had between 10-15 people in a group so that we could tell them personally our exciting news!

And then our chef prepared a fabulous lunch for everyone to enjoy together and we toasted with (non-alcoholic) apple cider.

Two of my work teammates commented during our meetings, saying they had been through more than one “sale of a company” in their careers and they were so grateful for the way Jackie and I handled it. We were patient, anticipated most everyone’s questions, and were so kind to everyone. That sure made us feel good. And, we turned an obstacle into an opportunity.

So, you might be wondering how we celebrated? Friday evening, both Jackie and I went home and had private dinners with our spouses.

And here’s the fun coincidence … more than five months prior, I had set up a dinner at my home for Saturday night January 21. I invited two produce icons and their spouses to dinner: Rob and Pamela Robson visiting from Brisbane, Australia (they founded ONEHARVEST produce company), and Dennis and Susi Gertmenian (Dennis founded Ready Pac Produce more than 30 years ago). So, you can imagine the texts I sent both of them on Friday about what we would be celebrating on Saturday … not just more than 30 years of friendship with all of them, but our company transaction!

(L to R) Jack Daly, Dennis and Susi Gertmenian, Doug Wiggins, me, Pamela and Rob Robson, and Jackie Wiggins.

You can only imagine how much champagne flowed and all the beautiful flowers and cards we enjoyed.

(L to R) Dennis Gertmenian, me and Rob Robson, lifelong produce friends

Many thanks to the team who helped us get to the finish line in record time, and we are so excited about what fantastic opportunities are in front of us with our new owners, Legacy Produce LLC. Our team here at Frieda’s is already buzzing with ideas and excitement! Success will come to us because we never saw this as an obstacle.

Karen

My daughter, Alex, and my 2-year-old grandson, Eli (pictured above), visited me at my house a few weeks ago. Eli was sitting in his highchair for dinner and started to get fussy about the food. You probably know what that’s like. Kids at any age want to choose what they eat and may throw a tantrum or two if they don’t get their way. He was VERY fussy, pushing away the food and shaking his head indicating he didn’t want it.

Well, then the most interesting thing happened.

Alex calmly said the following words: “Eli, I know you are frustrated right now. But my job as your parent is to decide what food is offered, where it is offered and when it is offered. Your job is to decide whether and how much to eat of what’s offered. I will stay here with you right now until you are ready to eat. I love you!” (By the way, this is the pioneering work of dietician, psychotherapist and author Ellyn Satter, who created what’s known as the “Division of Responsibility” in feeding.)

Then the craziest thing happened. He immediately calmed down and started eating. Frankly, I was a little shocked to hear Alex talk to her 2-year-old in such an adult manner, but it seemed like he understood what she said, and her cadence was slow and calming to him.

Later, after he went to bed, I commented to Alex that what I had witnessed was amazing.

Alex Jackson and Dr. Becky Kennedy (author)

She then told me about a parenting book she had read titled Good Inside by Dr. Becky Kennedy. Alex said the book and her podcast were recommended to her by another parent of a toddler. Alex had gifted me a copy of the book a few months earlier after she met Dr. Becky in person at a book signing!

“Good Inside” by Dr. Becky Kennedy

I put the book aside and it quickly got buried on my desk.

Well, a few weeks later I was having some personal challenges and Alex and I were talking about them. She said, “You know, mom, that Dr. Becky book might be really helpful—it’s not just for parents of young kids. I think everyone would benefit from reading it!” Challenge accepted. So, I immediately downloaded it on Audible and invested a few hours listening to Dr. Becky herself. (I just love it when the author does the recording of their own book!)

I learned soooo much from listening to that book. I actually used some of her phraseology when dealing with some tense situations on the golf course, and it worked like magic! The other person immediately calmed down and felt acknowledged.

I’ve actually found myself using Dr. Becky’s techniques during my work interactions as well, and her tactics have smoothed out some tensions.

And last time my grandson, Eli, was over, I tried Dr. Becky’s technique with him. He was in the kitchen opening and closing my non-child-proofed drawers and cabinets, and I was afraid he was going to get hurt. In a calm cadence, I said, “Eli I know it’s fun to open and shut the drawers and make loud noises, but I don’t want anything to fall out and hurt you. So, let’s close the drawer and go into the other room and we can play together.”

And like magic, he turned and walked with me to the family room to play!

Later, my daughter Alex commented on how great I did! She said I was a good learner! (Talk about turning the tables.)

So, whether or not you have young children, chances are you have frustrating situations. Instead of raising your voice or getting upset with these situations, I hope you’ll gift yourself Dr. Becky’s book Good Inside. The title of the book embodies her philosophy and serves to remind you that your child/spouse/coworker/sibling/friend is good inside and to repeat that mantra to yourself over and over as a way to be more calm.

I can’t wait to meet Dr. Becky sometime soon, so I can share my stories with her. When you get the book, let me know how it’s helped you, too.

Karen

My sister and I have always been active in our industry; we are not known for sitting on the sidelines. So, when our industry trade association, the United Fresh Produce Association, created and hosted the first Washington Public Policy Conference in 1995 in America’s capital, we were among the first to sign up to attend.

I remember that first conference. We were a relatively small group, maybe 200 attendees. Besides the expected speaker presentations and receptions, the best part was when we walked to Capitol Hill and met with our elected Congresspeople and Senators! Over the years, industry interest and participation in the conference have grown, and now (more than 20 years later), there are close to 500 industry members who convene in September each year.

After that first conference, we came home and could not get out of our heads how invigorating it was to be in Washington, D.C. To be active citizens.

And that’s when we hatched our big idea. How could we spread “the feeling” to other people in our industry?

A few days later, we went to our mom, Frieda, and told her we were going to invest some of the profits from the company that year to establish the “Frieda Rapoport Caplan Family Business Scholarship.” The scholarship would annually fund up to four members of our industry to attend the Washington conference each year. The only two requirements would be: 1) they had to work in a family business and 2) they could not have already attended the conference.

People asked us why we did it since it would not benefit our company directly. Our answer was that our mom was always active politically. She ran campaigns in college and our parents always took us with them to the polling places when they cast their votes in every election. We wanted a way to honor our mom while she was alive, and we also wanted people in our industry who were members of other family businesses to understand why it is critical to be active politically.

So, over the last 21 years, we have funded between two to four members of a U.S. family business to attend the Washington conference each year. Jackie, my daughter Alex, or I always connect with the scholarship winners and spend time with them at the conference. Afterward, we oftentimes get a personal note from them about how they were personally impacted by their attendance.

Last month, I received a personal letter from one of our 2022 scholarship winners. Her name is Mayra Vasquez and her company is Latin Specialties, LLC from Houston. Interestingly, her company and Frieda’s are considered to be competitors in the Texas market.

Here is an excerpt from her letter:

“Dear Karen,
I write you a little over a month after a life-changing experience you offered my family, our team and me here at Latin Specialties. As you may already know, our family business is small and second-generation. We were born and raised in Mexico City, therefore the impact of visiting Washington for the first time as an immigrant in this country was more impactful than I ever expected. Not only was I able to absorb the feel of America while visiting but had the honor and opportunity to represent my father’s legacy in front of lawmakers. He passed away in late 1998 and left the business to my two brothers and me.

My experiences in D.C. taught me invaluable lessons that I hope to pass on to colleagues in our industry. The most impactful lesson out of this journey for me was to learn how people are so unaware of the struggles our industry goes through, which can result in food insecurity for all if we don’t work together. I see that laws are passed by lawmakers who are not really well-versed on how mother nature works as well as how the supply chain system functions.

I’m excited to say that this experience encouraged me to not only advocate for the food industry in Washington, but to bring it back home and implement the educational piece in our daily practices so others can follow.

I cannot put all that I got from this experience into words. This was a surreal experience for me especially, and I have you and Jackie to thank for this opportunity.”

Wow!—was all I could say when I received this letter from Mayra. We accomplished what we set out to do … to change people’s lives. To encourage them to be active citizens. To promote the future of our industry.

And it did not matter that this attendee is considered to be my competitor by some. She and her company are truly my produce colleagues, and I am so happy we are working together for our mutual benefit.

Karen

My sister Jackie stands with the 2022 Frieda Rapoport Caplan Family Business Scholarship winners (L to R): Jesse Wiggins (no relation), Wiggins Farms, LLC; Bianca Kaprielian, Fruit World Company, Inc.; Frieda’s own Jackie Caplan Wiggins; and Mayra Vasquez, Latin Specialties, LLC.

When you read the words “frantic families,” did you wince just a little bit? Does it seem like the words “frantic” and “family” hit a little close to home, especially at this time of year? Let me share why this subject is top of mind for me.

It all started when we were in Queensland, Australia, in August. We were attending a four-day “pitch and putt” golf tournament at the world’s No. 1 Backyard Golf Course. When we arrived, all I saw were about 30 male golfers … and I thought to myself that it wasn’t going to be very much fun for me. Then I saw a small group of women, who turned out were golfing as well, and that made me feel more at home.

But one woman, Jo-Anne, was in a sling. Apparently, after too much golfing she ended up having shoulder surgery so was side-lined for that tournament. But she was sure fun to talk with.

Turns out, Jo-Anne Lashbrook is a business consultant and works for The Table Group in Australia. If the name, Table Group doesn’t sound familiar, then let me mention the name of the founder and CEO: Patrick Lencioni. Patrick is the author of Five Dysfunctions of a Team, Getting Naked, The Ideal Team Player, and about eight other business books. He is likely one of the top global management authors/gurus and is highly respected for his “business fables.” If you have read any of his books, then you will recognize that the books are short, always involve a humanistic story, and are so easy to learn from. I had the opportunity to meet Pat in person when he was speaking at a business conference in San Diego about 15 years ago.

Well, I’ve been reading Patrick’s books for more than 20 years and often recommend them to friends and work colleagues. Fun fact: Our company management team usually reads at least one or two business books a year together. This month, we are reading Five Dysfunctions of a Team.

Well, if you know me then you know that I am always networking. So, after our Australia visit, I accepted a friend request from Jo-Anne on Facebook and would occasionally see her postings.

Well, two weeks ago her post showed she and her family were at Disneyland! I immediately wrote her a Facebook message letting her know that she was less than five miles from my office. Long story short, she and her husband Matt rearranged their trip to pay me a visit at my office last week.

I can’t believe I forgot to take a photo when Jo-Anne and Matt visited me!

It was so fun to give two business consultants a tour of our warehouse and offices. Both Jo-Anne and Matt consult for The Table Group (she was there first), and I couldn’t help quoting their boss, Pat, several times during our visit.

As we were finishing breakfast, Jo-Anne said to me, “One of my most favorite of Pat’s books is one that is not well known.” The Three Big Questions for the Frantic Family was written in 2008 and, frankly, I was shocked that I had never heard of it. So, I immediately downloaded it and was able to listen to it over the weekend.

The short book brings some of the same tools and principles that people apply to planning and prioritizing their business lives and applies them in a similar way to the most important organization in their lives—their families.

After reading this book, I already have some thoughts about how I will use Pat’s Three Questions when planning for the upcoming year for my family. He makes it simple to understand, as the book is a fable, just like all his other books. I learned from Jo-Anne that Pat took a screenwriting class … which completely explains why his books are always so easy to read.

So, the three big questions?
• Question 1: What makes your family unique?
• Question 2: What is your family’s top priority—rallying cry—right now?
• Question 3: How are we going to talk about and use the answers to these questions?

This three-page summary article explains the concept even more.

I’m hoping you are intrigued. Just like strategic planning for a company or organization helps get everyone in the organization aligned on the vision, the mission, the values, and the priorities, this method uses a super simple, approachable way of getting your priorities straight for your family. Many of us have a tough time getting everyone in our family on the same page, and oftentimes it can feel like there are competing priorities.

After reading this fable, I actually can’t wait to go through this exercise at home. It will sure make it easier for me to say “no” to the many requests from people or organizations for my time. I learned in the book that once you have your short-term family priorities in place, it makes it easy to choose what to spend your time on.

I’m guessing you may have the same challenges I do in your family life. Be sure to let me know if these three big questions give you an easy context to help live with more purpose, clarity, and meaning as you look ahead to 2023.

Karen

It was great to spend the Thanksgiving weekend with family and friends. As per usual, we had a household debacle … this time, instead of the turkey not cooking fast enough in the oven, my dishwasher stopped working the morning of our big meal. And then the guest toilet stopped working after dinner.

These are first-world problems. And I know we were not the only people to have hiccups during the day—two of my friends texted me that their ovens stopped working—so they ended up barbecuing their turkeys! Ingenious!

Now that Thanksgiving weekend is over, what’s top of mind? Cyber Monday? Giving Tuesday? Shopping for holiday gifts?

How about none of the above?

What if you took some time between now and Christmas to think about next year—2023? What do you want to do, or accomplish, in the new year?

Travel?
Foster more personal or professional development?
Build on your health and fitness?
Form stronger personal connections with friends and family?

The time between the two big holidays is the PERFECT time to reflect on this past year and to look forward to the new year. Many of us have the “woulda, coulda, shouldas” about this year.

“I should have gone on a vacation to Spain … I saw so many of my friends post photos on Facebook and Instagram … makes me wish I went there.”

“I could have made sure to call my parents or grandparents more frequently …”

“If I’d gone to the gym more often, I would be in better shape by now.”

One of my coworkers set a goal for himself in 2021 to become a certified SCUBA diver in 2022. He mapped out the trips he would take and what classes were required (and when). Just last week told me he is now a certified instructor! And this a busy guy, even without this new hobby! The key was that last year he thought ahead, identified those things that were important to him, and created a plan of how to accomplish those goals. I’m sure he had the goals written down and put dates on the calendar to make sure he hit his target.

Everyone has their own goals and priorities. It may not be traveling to Spain or learning to SCUBA dive. However, I’ve learned that it pays off to make the time to start a list of those things that you want to accomplish—and then spend a few minutes each day or week adding to the list. Pretty soon you have a significant list of goals, including some “bucket list” items.

More than 10 years ago, I wrote out my first bucket list. It really wasn’t that hard, as I was at a weekend business retreat and our facilitator set aside about an hour for us to work on it. I have a lot of travel on my list (Spain, India, Morocco, Macchu Pichu, to name a few). I set a few business goals (revenue, profits, client targets, how much to donate to charity). I also added some health goals (run a half marathon, lower my resting heart rate, and sleep at least 7 hours a night).

When I found that bucket list buried on my desk when I moved 3 years ago, I realized that I would be better served to keep my bucket list more visible. Looking at it 7 years after writing it didn’t seem like I really wanted to accomplish the things on my list. If you’re looking for some ideas for a bucket list, you can do an internet search for “Bucket list” or try this one.

So now, I actually carry it around with me in my daily planning calendar. I review it each month’s end to see how I am tracking against my goals. And now that we are in the home stretch for the year, I am getting kind of excited to think about what I want to accomplish next year.

How about you? Next time you are trying to figure out what gift to buy a friend or partner, how about shifting to what gift you want to gift yourself in the new year? For every hour you spend surfing the web for gift ideas, how about investing an hour thinking about what’s important to you—and what you need to do to accomplish those things?

Just thinking about the new year—and what potential there is do some fun things in 2023—makes me smile.

How about you? I would love to learn what’s on YOUR bucket list for 2023.

Karen

It’s hard to believe that next week is already Thanksgiving. Last year when my family celebrated Thanksgiving we had an epic fail. Literally, the turkey never cooked! We are not sure what happened, but our oven never got hot enough to cook the turkey! So, we ate lots of appetizers and vegetables, and finally, a few hours later, when we got the oven heated up, we had (dry) turkey … to go with our pumpkin pie!

But honestly, that whole experience really demonstrated what I love most about Thanksgiving—and that is having my entire extended family and many close friends in our home, cooking and eating together. We can laugh about it (that we had a turkeyless Thanksgiving) now, but it really bonded us all.

This year, as we are planning our gathering for next weekend (we hold our family gathering on the Saturday after Thanksgiving), I realize what I am most grateful for are the special contributions each person makes to our all-day experience.

Part of our tradition is that my girls and I do most of the cooking and spend the entire morning cutting, chopping, cooking, and cleaning together. It is a special bonding experience for us that really brings us together as a family.

My daughter Sophia (who is gluten-free, soy-free, and dairy-free) makes “Sophia-friendly” deviled eggs and mashed potatoes. My daughter Alex makes her special roasted carrots and tomato pudding (like bread pudding but smothered in yummy fresh-cooked tomatoes). She lovingly makes two separate versions: one with gluten-free bread and non-dairy cheese, and another one with regular bread and cheese. There are plenty of food allergies in my family, so we accommodate all of them with no guilt!

I decided this year NOT to take a chance on cooking the turkey and am ordering pre-cooked turkey from our local supermarket. My specialties are an amazing green salad, roasted brussels sprouts, and steamed fresh haricots verts (thin green beans) with a shallot butter. And of course, I will be roasting cubed sweet potatoes, red and gold beets, and Stokes Purple® sweet potatoes.

My niece Heather and her husband Noah stop at Costco to purchase pumpkin and apple pies. My sister Jackie and a few of my friends pitch in by doing the dishes and clean up.

And of course, it is the one time of year that I make our signature Stokes Purple® Sweet Potato Pie. That purple-tinged pie, with homemade whipped cream, has become a family favorite!

Oh, and did I mention the wine we will be enjoying? That’s my partner Jack’s specialty. He brings out some of his special red wines for all of us to enjoy.

So, as you are gathering with your family and friends next week, I hope you will think about what a special memory you are creating. It is not about the flavor of the turkey. Or how stuffed you feel at the end of the day. Or how good the desserts are. It’s really about the memories you are creating together. Hopefully, you will not have the “fail” that we had last year with our turkey debacle, but even if you do, count it as a memory in the making.

And in case you are in the mood to try making a Purple Sweet Potato pie for your family gathering, please enjoy this recipe. It’s become our family favorite.

stokes purple® sweet potato pie with maple whipped cream

Warm wishes for an enjoyable Thanksgiving and Friendsgiving holiday weekend!

Karen

Last week, I attended a leadership conference in Las Vegas with more than 500 women from the U.S. and those representing more than 25 countries around the world. This was the International Women’s Forum’s annual Leadership Conference, and one of the many highlights are “behind the scenes local tours” that you can sign up for.

Because I signed up for my tour several months ago, I didn’t really remember what I chose. But on my badge was the word “Switch.” When I arrived at the loading area for the busses, my tour guide’s sign said, “Inside the Internet.” Whaaat?

First let me go back a few years to show why location matters here. In 2006, when I was a director of the Los Angeles branch of the Federal Reserve Bank, I remember one of our monthly meetings was held in Las Vegas. Nevada is part of the 12^th District of the Fed (as is California, Arizona, Alaska, Hawaii, Idaho, Oregon, Utah, Washington, plus American Samoa, Guam and the Commonwealth of the Northern Mariana Islands). During that meeting, speakers from Nevada presented to us and shared that Nevada historically is free of all natural disasters (earthquakes, floods, tornadoes, etc.) and thus is a place where many companies securely store their offsite data.

So, when we arrived at SWITCH headquarters several miles from the Las Vegas Strip, it all started to make sense.

SWITCH headquarters in Las Vegas SWITCH security car

Not only did we have to surrender our drivers’ license IDs when we entered the building, but there were no pictures allowed. (I took these few photos with permission from security.)

Powering the Future of the Connected World®

We were given an overview by one of the most confident and knowledgeable people I’ve ever heard present—Missy Young, Chief Information Officer of SWITCH. She is an 18-year employee and started working for founder, Rob Roy, shortly after he founded the company in 2000. When Switch Communications started it was mainly a government and military contractor, but the company started to target Fortune 1000 companies about a decade later. They have 5 Exascale, industry leading telecommunications solutions and next-generation technology data centers in the United States, plus two more coming on board in Milan, Italy and Thailand.

Rob currently owns multiple patents and trademarks and is truly brilliant. The company is currently public but it has plans to go private again soon. I didn’t get to meet Rob, but you can tell by the branding inside and outside the company, the uber high-level security, and the quality and passion of their team that he is an industry icon and inventor.

Check out this 3-minute video tour of the Las Vegas data center.

The way it’s set up is that SWITCH provides the power grid and the concrete buildings, as well as back up to power the data for companies around the world. Each client company provides its own services and equipment and is assigned fenced cabinets in areas of the various buildings. SWITCH never accesses anyone’s data. Each client company is responsible for all the maintenance and installation of their own equipment. SWITCH is the data warehouse and power source.

While we were touring one of buildings in Las Vegas, I turned to our tour guide, who happened to be a member of the sales team. I asked her, “Is this the easiest sales job ever?” She smiled at me and said “yes!” I asked her that because in the data security business, I cannot imagine there is another company on the planet that guarantees a 100% power uptime 24/7/365, plus security on par with the Pentagon, with triple backup systems. (In the video, the blue, red and grey-colored boxes are each a part of the power system grid with two of them always operational while the third one is being serviced.)

Fun fact: Every one of the staff was dressed in mostly black, with a bit of red. So I asked, is there a uniform? I was told that everyone who works for SWITCH always wears at least 51% black, and the rest of their outfit can be denim or grey with a “touch” of red (just like their buildings, their vehicles, and their website!).

As we were leaving SWITCH in Las Vegas, I asked if they give public tours. I was told if conventions are held in Las Vegas that tours of SWITCH are often available. They have resumed tours after a two-year COVID-induced pause. I would encourage anyone who has an interest in offsite data storage and security—or simply technology innovation in general—to find a way to tour SWITCH. They can’t mention all the names of their clients (without permission), but SWITCH runs Amazon. Enough said.

As we were leaving, Missy said to our group: And now you can tell everyone that you have been “inside the internet.” Literally.

Karen

“How are you doing today?”

This seemingly simple phrase turned out to be an attention-grabber today.

As you know, I read (listen to) a lot of books—more than most. In fact, earlier this week, I finished book #82 for 2022 entitled “The Ultimate Sales Machine.” It’s an old book, published 15 years ago by Chet Holmes. He has an impressive resume, including earning his way to top salesperson for Charlie Munger in one of his many businesses. (Charlie Munger is the vice chair of the multinational conglomerate holding company Berkshire Hathaway. And, in fact, it was Charlie who suggested that CEO Warren Buffet change his investment strategy to “buy great companies and hold them forever.”)

I decided to read “The Ultimate Sales Machine,” as it was highly recommended in a newsletter I get. I have become a voracious reader and lifelong learner because, as the old saying goes, you should spend more time sharpening your ax than you do chopping down a tree. (I call it “sharpening my ax 101.”)

In Chet’s book, he talks about the qualities of the best salespeople—and the worst salespeople. He emphasizes what it’s like from the buyers’/decision-makers’ point of view. Can you imagine if you were a decision-maker and spent a lot of your time each week listening to salespeople? Salespeople giving endless PowerPoint presentations where all they do is talk about themselves and their company? I cannot even imagine.

One of the phrases Holmes cautions against is “How are you doing today?” as a conversation starter. In the book, I listened to example after example of role-playing and what this phrase must sound like from the buyers’ point of view—it’s a throw-away line that seems to say, “I’m not prepared.” I won’t be using that phrase ever again.

Today I got to experience this gem of a phrase firsthand. Like everyone, I get random phone calls on my mobile phone or at my office. If I don’t recognize the number or area code, I let it go to voice mail. But something made me answer my cell phone this afternoon, as I thought I recognized the area code.

“How are you doing today?” was how this guy started the call. Are you kidding me?, I thought. He may have thought he got me on a bad day, but frankly, this phrase was a tip-off that the person on the other end of the phone was not a trained professional. And I only want to do business with trained professional salespeople.

I’m guessing most of Frieda’s clients feel the same way. They don’t like pitchy salespeople who are insincere, who try fake rapport-building techniques, or who aren’t prepared. There is nothing worse than a salesperson who has not rehearsed ahead of the client presentation.

How about you? Are you the salesperson, or the client? It’s likely that you fill both roles at different times during your day/week/year.

Do you want to be considered a professional salesperson? I’ve always considered the other person’s point-of-view before starting a conversation. Lean into what makes them tick. A professional salesperson studies and researches their client and what drives them. They are not trying to sell something—they want to help their client buy.

You may not think that you are a salesperson. That may not be your official title or role at your company. But everyone is a salesperson some of the time.

What about when you go on a job interview? Ever thought about that one? When you’re applying for a position at a company (or for a promotion), you certainly are the salesperson—you’re selling yourself! Approach that next job interview or performance review that way. Would starting the conversation with a mundane phrase like “How are you today?” get you noticed? Would it make you memorable? Would it prompt the interviewer to want to know more about you? If you make a habit of filling that initial void with small-talk phrases like this, consider a new approach. What new steps would you take and what results might you get?

Think about it.

Karen

First, if you are not in the produce industry, you may be wondering why I’m so often asked this question. Let me explain.

The produce industry encompasses every segment of the life cycle of fresh fruits and vegetables, from seed companies to growers, packers, transportation, and logistics to wholesale distributors and retailers. Several times a year this unique network that make up the produce industry, comes together to highlight their paramount innovations. Companies delight in sharing their new products or services, and buyers are on the hunt for business solutions and connections with their suppliers. Next week, the largest North American produce trade show is taking place in Orlando, Florida.

Of course, trade shows occur in every industry, from technology to the beauty industry and everything in between. It is one of the most efficient ways to meet a bunch of people, versus traveling to meet all your customers or suppliers, in person, at various locations.

But trade shows do not replace the intimate, in-person visit to a company headquarters. They are just a plus. And you get to see what other companies are doing.

My first produce convention was during my time in college. I was living in the San Francisco Bay area and the big produce convention happened to be in San Francisco that year. So, my mom, Frieda, encouraged me to skip classes and drive over to the convention hotel to “work the booth.”

I can vividly remember all the growers and customers – it was a definite whirlwind as a first timer. But the buzz, the people, the enthusiasm, was intoxicating. Plus, I am a people person, so meeting all those new people completely inspired me. It is not a surprise that for the next three years of college, I would “skip class” to join my mom at the various industry trade shows.

Over time, the number of trade shows increased each year. In fact, at one point, I counted more than ten regional and national produce trade shows occurring in one year. With so many options, buyer attendance at shows decreased and the only thing that was increasing was the cost for suppliers to exhibit and staff a show.

In fact, in 2017 I encouraged my company to scale back. We stopped displaying at 90% of the trade shows, and after experimentation, we chose the events with the highest client attendance and engagement. My prediction was that trade shows were dying, and few would be viable in the future.

And then COVID hit.

Now, there were zero opportunities to see growers and clients in person. Zoom and Teams meetings were the new norm. Ever heard of “Zoom Fatigue”? Well, I can tell you it is real. And one of the worst parts of Zoom meetings, is when people do not turn on their cameras, so you have no idea if anyone is there.

Well, now that vaccinations and boosters are here, and large companies are allowing their employees to travel on business, the trade show business has become active again. I attended my first in-person produce industry event in July and I’ll admit, it was a little strange. No masks, lots of handshakes and hugs with rooms filled with people sitting close together listening to speakers. But I survived. And it was nice to reconnect with people in person, after two and half years of living behind a screen.

Fast forward to next week. The recently merged Produce Marketing Association and United Fresh Produce Association are now the International Fresh Produce Association, and they are holding their inaugural global produce and floral trade show. Formerly, this October trade show had attendees from all over the world and attendance was close to 20,000 people. It consisted of three days dedicated to meetings, cocktail parties, keynote speakers, panels and of course aisle after aisle of booths.

This year, the vibe and attendance are a bit less intense. The exhibit hall has fewer booths, and we’ve noticed many companies are not exhibiting. Pre-registration is barely at 10,000 people. And surprise, surprise, my company decided to exhibit this year, after a 5-year hiatus.

Why are we exhibiting? We have changed a lot since COVID and the best way to demonstrate that is in-person. We have a 10 ft x 20 ft booth and are taking several members of our sales, marketing, and buying teams. And we are excited to show off the fresh look and feel of our brand. You see, we leveraged the pandemic to our advantage. We conducted consumer research and refreshed the look and feel of our packaging. If you have seen our products at your local market, or online, then you know what I mean. Our new look rocks! (Oops, guess I should be more humble)

But that is not the entire reason we are attending this trade show.

We are going because people do business with people they like and people whom they trust. And the best way to get to know people is by meeting them in person. Face to face. Smile to smile. Make eye contact.

I love people and to be successful in business you must like people. I anticipate that next week’s trade show in Orlando will be energizing, stimulating, and inspiring! And I can’t wait!

Karen

I know this may be a complicated question for some, as we all have some version of a “love/hate” relationship with family members. Most of us would say that, in general, we love our kids. We love our spouse. We love our parents. And we want to be there for them.

But my real question is about how you take care of yourself and your physical and mental health, as many of us are not thinking long term. If you really loved your family members, then would you be taking better care of your own health, both physically and mentally?

Would you make different choices? Would you schedule time weekly to do cardio exercises, ensuring you are heart healthy long term? I’m not talking about a slow walk around the block with your dog. I’m talking about working up a sweat and burning some calories, on a regular basis.

Would you be mindful of your food choices when buying groceries or when dining out? Would you think twice about ordering a burger and fries when healthier options are available? Would you try intermittent fasting to get your blood sugar in line and consume less calories? Would you eat more fresh fruits and vegetables, cut down on red meat or stop eating fried foods?

What about getting enough sleep? Do you set yourself up for a restful night of sleep (7-8 hours)? For me, that means planning ahead for when I need to be up in the morning and counting back 8.5 hours, ensuring I get enough rest.

What about times of emotional distress? A death of a relative or close friend, marital or relationship challenges, or a serious illness. Do you reach out for help? I remember what it took for me to see a therapist the first time, over 25 years ago. It was a real process to realize I was not broken, but rather that there were professionals out there who could help me process the emotions I was experiencing.

This past week I saw a dear, lifelong friend. He’s a few years older than me and we don’t see each other very often. Something was not right, as he wasn’t his usual vibrant self that I’ve come to know so well. One of his closest friends had recently passed away and I sensed that he was experiencing tremendous grief. As we get older, we experience the passing of people who seem “too young”, far more often and it’s easy to fall into despair.

We might drink a little more. Eat some unhealthy foods and stop our exercise routine. All while our sleep patterns become erratic. It can quickly become a downward spiral. We chalk it up to “being sad or in mourning”.

So, I ask the question: “Do you really love your family?”. The family that is still alive. It could be your kids, grandkids, or other important people in your life.

If you really love your family, you will make changes that guarantee a healthier, longer life. And you don’t have to be in your 60s, 70s, or 80s to be thinking about these decisions. Start living now and share the best version of yourself with your family.

Contrary to popular belief, none of us are invincible. Take some time and think about how you show up for yourself. You don’t have to love the reflection in the mirror, but you should strive to get to a place where you like the person staring back at you. Once this happens, you’ll begin down a path of prioritizing healthy choices and create a space that promotes self-love.

Karen

During the month of August, I was fortunate to spend 3 weeks traveling in Australia. My life partner, Jack is a professional speaker and scheduled seven gigs there, which is how I ended up in “Oz” for so long. It was a great trip; I made many new friends and learned a few things along the way:

It’s really not that far away! From Los Angeles to Sydney is a 14-hour flight. Like Jack says, “that’s just a meal, a nap, and a movie away”. When you board international flights, they usually depart in the late evening. Right after boarding, they provide a meal and then it’s time to sleep (it’s late at night, so a 6–8-hour snooze works out). I highly recommend noise cancelling headphones and an eye mask to help eliminate outside noises and light. If you need a sleep aid, I suggest bringing that along, as well. Before you know it breakfast is served, and you are on the ground. Voila!

Australians have their own slang and it’s wildly amusing! For example, I had to get used to people asking, “How are you going?” compared to the American version of, “How are you doing?”.

Footy = Football

Ankle Biter = Child

Coldie = Cold Beer

And my all-time favorite, “Seppo”, which loosely translates to American. I’m not sure how they arrived at that, but it goes something like this: Yank > rhymes with septic tank> abbreviation for septic is “seppo”. Thus, Jack and I were referred to as “seppos” and we were not supposed to be offended. For more: check out the Australia Slang Dictionary.

We visited 4 major cities in Australia: Sydney, Adelaide, Melbourne and then Brisbane. Each city has its own personality and vibe. Melbourne brings a strong business feel, where people dress up and are less likely to give a standing ovation after a performance. Sydney is quite metropolitan. Both are great walking cities. It was my first visit to Adelaide, and there, out in the country I felt like I was traveling from village to village. We went out to breakfast one morning and found out that breakfast places didn’t even open until 9:00am. Maybe because I have always been an early morning person with my work and all, but 9am seemed quite late to open a breakfast spot.

Each evening that we went out to dinner with friends and business colleagues, we noticed the same pattern. A few moments after you were seated, you were expected to order. Unlike in Europe where meals are more leisurely, or in America where you order drinks first and then your meal, requesting a slow-paced service if you desire. In Australia, you are expected to order right away, and you are served almost immediately. Another unexpected element is that everyone orders an Entrée and a Main. An Entrée is what we call an appetizer, and a main, is well, your main dish.

Driving on the left side of the road looks difficult but it’s surprisingly easy. While in Brisbane, I wanted to get a manicure, so I borrowed a friends’ car. It was the second trip I had been on where I would be driving on the left side of the road, and I admit I was a bit apprehensive. But once I got behind the wheel and took off, it was not that hard. Admittedly, I drove slower than usual and took my time parallel parking or backing out of a parking space. Thank goodness for the rear cameras that are now standard in cars.

While down under, we did some unique exploring and had a lot of fun along the way.

We golfed at the World’s Best Backyard Golf Course in Brisbane (as featured in GOLF Magazine!). This course is owned by Jack’s longtime friend and colleague, Rob Nixon. We tried to perfect our wedge and putting game for 3 days. 9 holes, 3 greens per hole; all in one backyard. There were 34 of us in the tournament and I am very proud to say I came in at #33. I gave Mario a big hug and a handshake for saving me from last place.

Rob Nixon handing me a souvenir ball marker before I teed off All 34 participants and spouses behind the winner. Notice the real Australian PGA Tournament Trophy on display This guy dressed up for the post golf party

After we left Australia, we stopped in Auckland, New Zealand for a couple of days before heading back to California. I still can’t believe I rode to the top of the Sky Tower, the tallest structure in Auckland, at 1,076 feet above sea level. You don orange jumpsuits and ride the elevator to the top. Then you get hooked onto multiple safety straps and go to the tower outside, near the very top and walk around the entire tower platform (with no fence or bar to protect you). Thankfully, I am not afraid of heights, but I was happy to be back on solid ground after an hour. I highly recommend you check it out with a friend!

Me at the top of the Sky Tower Jack and me at Sky Tower

So, next time you are thinking of a great place to go for an extended vacation, consider Australia. Another bonus is that they have opposite seasons to us (since they are in the Southern Hemisphere). In August, it’s almost spring and the weather was mild. Make a bucket list for your travels and check them off.

G’day mate!

Karen

Both of my parents were always politically active, and it started at an early age. In fact, when my mom was in college – she did not want to run for office herself, but she organized the campaign to get one her friends elected as Student Body President at UCLA. That friend happens to be Judge Harry Pregerson who went on to be a Ninth Circuit Court Judge, which is one below the U.S. Supreme Court!

My dad stayed active in local groups here in Southern California and helped organize a community group to reduce Gang Violence. Part of that was helping campaign for the first woman elected as Orange County Supervisor, The Honorable Harriet Weider.

Both of my parents felt it was important to be active citizens and to exercise your right/privilege and vote. Some of my earliest childhood memories were going to our neighborhood polling place with mom and dad (and my sister Jackie) and watching them cast their vote (this was before you could vote by mail).

So, it should not come as a surprise that while our mom was alive, Jackie and I wanted to honor her within our produce industry. In 2001, we established and funded the Frieda Rapoport Caplan Family Business Scholarship, through one of our trade associations. I remember walking into my mom’s office with Jackie to share the exciting news that we created an annual scholarship in her name. It was her passion for being an active citizen and support of enriching family businesses that led to this annual scholarship. This allowed members of any family business within the produce industry to apply and attend the yearly fly-in to the Capitol for the Washington Public Policy Conference in DC.

Since its initiation, we have awarded between two to four scholarships each year and have made many new industry friends. Either Jackie or I will attend the conference, meet up with the scholarship winners, and help guide and connect them with produce peers throughout the conference. Some have even visited us at our office – meeting Frieda when she was alive!

Washington conference attendees.

So, it was an amazing coincidence, as I thought about writing this blog, that I received the following email last week, from a previous scholarship winner:

Hi Karen,

Hope you’re doing well. I enjoy keeping up with you on your blog, fun stuff. I just had an “aha” moment and had to share and say thank you.

Since returning to the ranch, I’ve gotten more involved with the political side of things. Gradually learning the players…listening more…. building relationships, etc….it has been great. I’ve been on the board of California Citrus Mutual for several years now and have done a lot of state government relations work and have really enjoyed it. Recently the incoming board chair asked me to join their executive committee. A big part of that role is doing advocacy in DC. As I was just now working on final logistics for my trip, I realized I’m going to be there almost at the same time as the Washington Conference. It dawned on me that 12-13 years ago I went to the same conference thanks to a scholarship I received from your family. So, thank you!

I know my attendance at the conference so many years ago has been so influential. And not just for advocacy in the citrus industry. My young daughter Laura and I, did an advocacy trip to DC for JDRF when she was six years old, and she still talks about it. The fire has been lit in her as well.

Have a great rest of the week and let me know if you ever pass through the Porterville area. Would love to show you around.

Warm Regards,

Julia Inestroza, Family Business Owner and Citrus Grower

It is amazing how things work out and that a small scholarship for a 2-day conference several years ago, could have such an influence on all members of a family. Have you ever thought about the impact you could make if you went to Washington DC? Or even to your own state capitol or city hall? What if, instead of complaining about what our elected officials are doing, that you chose to be on a subcommittee, attend a hearing or listening session and made your voice heard.

It’s not as hard as you think it might be and you could make an incredible difference not only in your community, but for the next generation.

That is what motivates me. What motivates you?

Karen

Last month in this blog, I shared advice to my 30 year old self. In it, I mentioned that I hoped that my two daughters, Sophia (age 28) and Alex (age 32) would read my own advice and reflect on the the impact that has on their own lives.

That blog was actually published by one of our produce industry publications, AndNowUKnow a few weeks later and it was personally rewarding to receive many emails from industry friends who said my advice really resonated with them.

So, you can imagine my surprise when I opened up an email newsletter from The Snack a few weeks later and learned that my eldest daughter Alex had written her own self-reflection and that same publication published it.

Alex is brave and really opened up the kimono when sharing her personal journey, and her reflections on what it was like to grow up as my daughter and Frieda’s granddaughter. It is with great joy and admiration, that I share her comments here:

I remember when I was turning 30 in 2019. The first thing that came to my mind was, “I am not anywhere near ready to run a company…”

No one asked. However, it became apparent to me that I had put the pressure on myself to know the answer to that unasked question as I approached my 30^th year, because it was burnt in my head that my mom became President of Frieda’s, our family business, at the age of 30.

In 1985 when my mom, Karen, turned 30, I was not even a glimmer in her eye (or however that saying goes). My mom was jumping into the infinite abyss of the unknown that only my grandmother Frieda had experienced: being a woman running a produce business. Karen worked with Frieda for almost 10 years, and Frieda was also supposed to be her source of inspiration. I feel alone just thinking of how alone my mom must have felt not knowing many other women business owners during that time. When a challenge lies ahead, we naturally turn to those who have done it before, and I am not sure my mom had anyone to turn to.

My mom took on a lot at the age of 30. She “had it all” on paper: She was married, had a house, car, and ran a business. At the age of 30, I also “had it all” on paper, but I felt unfulfilled from the depths of my being.

What I did not have at the age of 30 was self-love, belief in my inner voice, and belief that I was enough. I must imagine my mom Karen had the same thoughts at some point in her 30s.

So, as I turned 30 years old, I remained lost, unhappy, and unmotivated. I gained 50 lbs self-medicating with food. A few months after I turned 30, my grandma Frieda died. That sucked. I panicked, worrying about where I was going to turn for reassurance I was capable of everything I was taking on in my life, as my grandma, Frieda, played that role for me as my only antidote to my rampant imposter syndrome.

Then COVID hit.

I lost 50 lbs.

I got pregnant.

I turned 31.

Then…I woke up. Specifically, on December 29, 2020, while giving birth to my beautiful, perfect, cherub child Eli. And that awakening has continued every day since.

I got divorced.

I moved out on my own for the first time in my life.

I turned 32.

Jody Boyman, psychologist, wildlife photographer, and entrepreneur, shared on the Second Life podcast something her graduate advisor said to her when she was at a crossroads in her life: “Women’s lives are nonlinear. You have the opportunity at every moment in the day to make a radical pivot if you want, if that is your decision.”

Shortly after giving birth, I realized I needed to make a radical pivot in order to love myself, knowing loving myself meant I could finally live up to my full potential. Over the previous two years, my unhappiness within myself was so palpable. I was grasping on to any answer to the question I kept asking myself, “What would make me happier?”

Should I move?

Should I quit my job at my family’s business?

Would losing weight make me happier?

Answer: No. Absolutely not. Tried that, didn’t make me happier.

I realized I was in a relationship that subtracted from my self-love, and I had to end my 10-year relationship, five years married, with my child’s father.

It was the best decision I ever made, and the scariest one as well. I was tearing apart a “family.” I was going against everything I ever wanted (no divorce). And I was also so unhappy, unmotivated, insecure, and bored.

What did I want?

I wanted to love myself. I wanted to love my growing career in an industry that fulfilled me. I wanted to love being Eli’s mom. I wanted to try new things and spend time with those that support me and share open and honest communication.

Today, I am on the other side of this journey. Not completely out of the woods, but for the first time I’m confident in myself. I have a healthy relationship with food, I have overcome my imposter syndrome (that was tough), and I am happy.

Money does not buy happiness. The job title does not buy happiness. The house, the car, and the clothes do not buy happiness.
My daughter Alex and her adorable son, Eli.
Self-love can provide endless amounts of happiness. A relationship where you feel heard and valued can add to that self-love.

I imagine my mom had a similar journey in her 30s (and 40s and 50s), however, in the 1980s, ’90s, and early 2000s, it was taboo to say you were unhappy when everything on paper added up to happiness.

Nothing magical happens at the age of 30 that triggers a pivot. It seems to be a common milestone year for my mom and me. The awareness may have been all I needed to know I have the authority to make changes. I’m responsible for my own happiness, and I’m the only person that can prioritize an adjustment. Like Jody’s advisor said, you have the opportunity at every moment to make a radical pivot.

Karen’s five pieces of advice are crucial. I have a business coach—two, actually—and they have helped me live to my full potential. I finally have a financial advisor for the first time (financial confidence is very freeing). The rest of Karen’s points? Check, check, and check.

I wouldn’t change my journey for anything because it all leads me to feeling happier than I ever have. So, here is what I wish I knew at the start of it:

Self-love is the only type of love that will make you truly, deeply happy. Without self-love, anyone else’s love for you will not fulfill you. You will always feel like something is missing.

Listen to yourself. Your inner voice is powerful. You know yourself better than anyone. And, in order to listen to yourself, you need to love yourself.

You are not alone. When you feel alone, I challenge you to call someone you trust and say you need to talk, and they will listen. They will make you feel less alone. They may not have the answers you need, but they will assure you that you are not alone.

See a therapist. Mental health is sexy. If #1 through #3 sound scary/hard/impossible, see a therapist. My therapist’s name is Beth, she’s a Libra, and she is the best.

You are enough. You deserve to realize how valuable you are and that everyone and everything in your life should be adding to your greatness, not subtracting from it. If this also sounds scary/hard/impossible, see a therapist

Advice is a dime a dozen, and everyone has an opinion of how everyone else should live their lives and run their business. It is easy to be critical when you are outside, looking in. It is much more challenging when you’re looking into a mirror. Your personal and professional life are more intertwined than we give them credit. Finding passion in the work toward self-love will only illuminate the passion in work, too.

When is the last time you wrote a handwritten thank-you note?

In this day of texts and emails, it’s so easy to send someone a quick text after you have a meal together, or perhaps you send an email after a client meeting. Of course, I do those things, too.

However, I am a big believer in the power of handwritten notes. This year, I have a personal goal of sending more personal, handwritten notes than I did last year. And last year I wrote 511 (yes, you read that correctly, five hundred and eleven—more than one a day)! Why would I do such a thing … and why would I track it?

I have found that making the time to pen a handwritten note makes me recall the person I am writing to. I recall the memory and the feeling about them. Whether it is a birthday card to a special friend, or a thank-you note for a special gift or experience, I love pausing to think about that person.

For example, I was at a produce industry show a few weeks ago and had the chance to chat with someone I had never met before at a cocktail party. He is a supermarket executive at a well-known company. We chatted for about 20 minutes, and I learned that he was just starting to play golf (like me), and he happened to share his middle name (which most people do not know). When I got back to my office, I could have easily sent him an email saying that I enjoyed chatting with him.

Instead, I went home, ordered an extra copy of a small book on golf that I am reading, and (after it arrived) I penned him a handwritten note. I squeezed in his middle name on the card (I thought he would chuckle), shared why I was sending him the book and then dropped it in the mail.

Just a few days later I received a text from him! It included a photo of the book cover, many smiley faces and this comment, “I can tell you listened to me” … and he wrote his middle name.

It’s my hope that each time he grabs that book or plays a round of golf, that he reminisces on our great conversation. This is the kind of personal connection that can’t be replicated through email.

So, why do I track the number of handwritten notes I send? For two reasons: First, I set a goal and the only way to achieve a goal is to track your progress. Second, filling in my “HWN” (handwritten note) number causes me to think of who else I could or should write a note to. (I recap my goals each month, so each week I glance at my calendar to see what actions I’ve taken. This provides a great reminder.)

Finally, you’re probably wondering how I wrote so many letters last year. When you track a personal goal, it can often become a fun, internal competition with yourself, however this goal empowered me to communicate with others in an authentic way and had surprising results. For example, when I wanted to reach out to a friend who was going through a rough patch in her life, I realized that sending a text was one thing, but I could make an even more positive impact by hand-writing a personal note, or picking out a “thinking of you” card and writing a short-but-sweet message. In fact, one friend confided in me that when she receives a note from me, it completely cheers her up.

So, the next time you are thinking of a friend, family member or business colleague, grab a pen, dash off a quick note, and bring a smile to their face.

Do you have any hand-written note stories? I’d love to hear them!

Karen

I know estrogen might seem like an usual topic for my blog, but stick with me on this one. Because I am guessing that more than 50% of the readers of this blog are women. And the rest of the readers are somehow related to, working with or living with a woman. So, the topic is pretty relevant to everyone.

So, last week my doctor recommended the book Estrogen Matters to me.

At some time in a woman’s life, she will have the opportunity to decide whether or not to take estrogen—whether it’s making the choice to take birth control pills (which contain estrogen) or to take estrogen later in life when she begins to go through menopause.

Like many baby boomers, I was on birth control pills for more than 30 years (from college until my early 50s). But when I started to go through menopause, my doctor suggested that I take hormone replacement therapy (HRT—a combination of estrogen AND progesterone). My doctor (at that time it was a male doctor) assured me that it was safe, that it would keep my moods even, eliminate those pesky hot flashes, and help keep my skin soft and “young looking.”

But each year when I went to see my doctor, I would ask him if I should continue taking my HRT. Was it safe? Especially after my sister Jackie was diagnosed with breast cancer 11 years ago, my doctor and I had many conversations. I was aware of the Women’s Health Initiative (WHI) study that took place more than 20 years ago, and some of the results were interpreted to imply that taking estrogen could increase the risk for breast cancer.

My male doctor retired a few years ago, and my new doctor (a woman this time) and I continued these discussions each year. She assured me that the research showed that, in fact, the benefits of taking estrogen after menopause were significant. Especially for heart and brain health. Plus, it helps keep your skin looking young (and that is something I really appreciate).

But about six months ago, one of my annual health tests had a somewhat unusual result. And I got scared. I decided that I should stop taking my HRT. My doctor told me it was my choice, but warned me of the side effects: most notably, frequent and extreme hot flashes and insomnia. And some extra muscle aches and pains.

And that’s what I have been experiencing for the last six months: raging hot flashes several times a day and insomnia many times a week.

So last week, when I went back to see a different doctor and mentioned that I stopped my HRT a few months ago, she told me she would not have recommended that to me. She gently suggested I read the book, Estrogen Matters: Why Taking Hormones in Menopause Can Improve Women’s Well-Being and Lengthen Their Lives—Without Raising the Risk of Breast Cancer. On my way home that day, I downloaded the book on Audible and started listening to it.

I could not stop listening to the book, narrated by two authors: Avrum Bluming, MD, and Carol Tavis, PhD. I appreciated the detailed and balanced research that Dr. Tavis included, and it was compelling to hear Dr. Bluming give personal examples of his debates with other physicians.

The two scientifically proven benefits of estrogen that got my attention the most may inspire you to get the book and read it for yourself. Estrogen is proven to maintain and improve:

1) brain health (think memory loss and Alzheimer’s prevention), and

2) heart health (think stroke and heart attacks)

Those two things alone (brain and heart health)—which are always top of mind as we get into our 50s, 60s and 70s—made it an easy decision for me to go back on my hormone replacement therapy. I’ve already re-ordered my prescriptions and can’t wait for them to arrive.

If you have an interest in improving women’s well-being and lengthening their lives, either for yourself or a loved one, get this book. It’s an easy read, and it’s great to have the history and the facts about why estrogen matters.

Karen

This month marks 36 years since I became president and CEO of Frieda’s. It won’t be hard to do the math—I became president of the company when I was 30.

Industry news article featuring me (on the left) and my mom Frieda. Circa 1980.

Like most everyone, I definitely feel like I have so much more insight and wisdom now than I did at age 30. At 30 years old, I was very confident in some ways, and a bit insecure in others. In hindsight, I find that I had some things flipped. My self-confidence in some areas was actually wrong. But I survived and so did my company. So, if I had it to do over again, these are some of the things I would tell my 30-year-old self (some personal, some business):

1. Get a business coach right away.

At 30 years old, my first action after being appointed president was to apply to be a member of YPO (Young Presidents’ Organization). I had heard about this incredible organization for young leaders and that you had to be 30 to be interviewed. But when I went to my interview, the panel’s first question was, “What does your husband think of you applying to be a member of YPO?” I was shocked, and besides saying that I had no idea what he thought, I asked them if they asked all their male applicants what their wives thought? It will come as no surprise that they did not invite me to join. However, I should have found another resource to coach me. A dozen years later, I finally joined another CEO organization—Vistage—and about 7 years ago I got a private executive coach. I think the best thing anyone in business can do is get a coach. Get someone who will be honest with you and give you tough feedback. As a leader, it is hard to get honest feedback from inside your organization.

2. Budgeting is important and can give you freedom.

On the business side, I started the annual budgeting process at the company after I’d been president for about 10 years. I took over the company at a time when all processes were manual. Once Lotus 1-2-3 was adopted (the pre-cursor to Excel), it made things so much easier. But I really wish I had educated myself sooner on the benefits of budgeting and finance in my personal life. I likely would not have bought so many cars or purchased so many houses, and I would’ve been more frugal in my spending. If you have kids, start them out at an early age meeting with a financial planner.

3. You don’t have to be married to do things socially.

Many of us felt the pressure to get married growing up. You know, date for a while, get married, and have two kids. Fit in. I felt a fair amount of pressure to be married when I was younger and was not comfortable much of the time socializing with other couples, unless I was part of a couple. Today, in 2022, there is so much more acceptance for being single, or going places by yourself, even in business. I wish I knew that I would be just fine going places by myself and not feeling like I had to have a date for every event I attended.

4. Listen to your mother and your father.

I recall so many things each of my parents said to me about business over the years, and I disregarded their suggestions. I was so hell-bent on making my own decisions that several times I did a 180 just to have my own idea and not take my parents’ advice. Over the years, I’ve found myself saying the same things my mom used to say to me (and I chuckle). “If I had only listened to her then!”

Fortunately, I did learn to recognize the many wise pieces of advice my mom, Frieda, gave to me, and I now openly and generously give her credit. Especially when you have your own children—and you see them roll their eyes, unimpressed—you’re reminded of what you may have felt with your own parents. I oftentimes preface my comments to my daughters with, “Grandma used to say this to me, and I thought she was annoying. Now, I realize how smart she was.” You know, all mothers are annoying at some point! Even me.

5. It’s more important to be respected than to be liked, especially in business.

Listen to your gut. Oftentimes, as I was maturing in my business journey, I would have a negative feeling about something or someone. But I felt pressure to ignore those gut warnings. Most of the time I regretted that. My sister/business partner, Jackie, has reminded me many times about the importance of listening to my gut, and at least exploring the concern out loud. Do you ever have a bad feeling about someone or something, but don’t want to appear as if you are being negative or critical? I wish I had been less concerned about being liked then.

Today, both of my daughters are about the same age as I was when I became president: Alex is 32 and Sophia is 28. I’m hoping when they read this that they are able to embrace some of my insights and use them as they grow and develop as leaders and humans. If not now, maybe in another 30 years!

I feel like it’s a very exciting time for young people, as there are so many more resources available and so many more support systems.

What would you write to your 30-year-old self? What advice do you have?

Karen

I love vegetables! I know that’s probably not a surprise to you since I am in the fresh fruit and vegetable business, but apart from the business, I just love eating vegetables. I love the crunch, I love the colors and I particularly love the flavors.

So, when I go out to dinner and am deciding what to order for my meal, I always look at the vegetable appetizers and side dishes.

Over the July 4^th weekend, we went to Bandon Dunes Golf Resort near Coos Bay, Ore., and each evening chose a different option for dinner. On our last night at the golf mecca, we went to the highly recommended Pacific Grill. It had the look of your typical golf clubhouse, but when I saw the chef walking around the dining room when we arrived, I had a feeling I was in for a delicious surprise.

I immediately spotted what I was going to order: Grilled Carrot Salad.

Have you noticed that carrots are being featured on many menus these days? I refer to carrots as the “vegetable of the year,” as I have noticed that small fresh carrots, with the tops still on, have made a comeback. I see them on almost every menu when I go out to dinner.

Pacific Grill’s room-temperature carrots, arranged over a Mediterranean-inspired yogurt sauce, were to die for! I literally licked the plate.

Fast forward one week. This past weekend we had some friends over for dinner and I decided to make dinner for them. My most challenging decision each time I prepare a meal is which vegetables to make! And this was no exception.

All of a sudden it came to me—I would attempt to replicate the Grilled Carrot Salad from Bandon Dunes!

Most restaurants have started to list the main ingredients in their menu items to make their side dishes seem more enticing. So, I did a quick search of the menu, and—sure enough—all the ingredients were listed.

Spiced labneh (I substituted plain greek yogurt) and dukkah were the main ingredients (I made fresh dukkah using my mortar and pestle … another first!). I figured out a quick way to pickle raisins (I soaked them for a few hours in balsamic vinegar). And I roasted two bunches of long, fresh carrots (with a bit of the stem left on) early in the afternoon, then arranged them on a serving platter at room temperature so they would wilt and wrinkle a bit.

When dinnertime came, I felt so accomplished! I had created a new side dish for my dinner guests, inspired by a recent visit to an upscale restaurant.

Have you ever thought of doing this? Perhaps you are flipping through a magazine, or see photos on Instagram, and get the idea for a dish to prepare. You don’t have a recipe, but you can surely use your eyes to give you a vision of a recipe to create.

Cooking this way makes me feel more creative and less like someone who has to follow a recipe exactly.

I would love to hear if you have created a new vegetable side dish recipe after being inspired. Please do share!

Karen

Almost 250 years ago, our forefathers and foremothers fought for our nations’ freedom. As we head into the July 4^th weekend, and with the Supreme Court Dobbs case last week overturning the 50-year-old landmark Roe v Wade case, there are many people (both women and men) who are having legitimate concerns about whether there is true freedom in the United States.

I was just graduating from high school in 1973, the year of Roe v Wade, so this landmark case is the only thing I’ve ever known. Women having federal protection and the freedom to make decisions about their own bodies is all I have ever known, and the only thing my two daughters and their friends have ever known.

It is quite alarming to consider the implications of this ruling. The ruling has pushed the issue back to the state level. Living in California, I’m far less likely to see this decision roll back; therefore, my concern goes out to the citizens living in states where rulings are already shifting away from women’s reproductive rights. This ruling largely affects minority groups in America, especially those with limited support systems.

So, I had to do, what I have found myself doing in the last few years, when confronted with difficult times and decisions. I channel my inner “Frieda”. My mom, Frieda always provided a sensible reaction in challenging times. Born in 1923, her own parents escaped to the U.S. from Russia after WWI, seeking freedom and independence. During college, she witnessed the horrific scenes unfolding for her Japanese American friends after the Pearl Harbor attack, as they were sent to internment camps solely because of their heritage.

Right now, my mom would have emphasized the importance of being an active citizen. Don’t sit on the sidelines.

Register to vote. Get your friends to register to vote. Support experienced and existing organizations doing the hard work. Offer to drive people to polling places on election day, so they can vote. Make donations to candidates in other states who support the same issues which are important to you, so more like-minded people will be elected to the US Congress and Senate.

I am reminded of a quote from my all-time favorite movie, “The American President”, starring Michael Douglas and Annette Bening:

“America isn’t easy. America is advanced citizenship. You’ve gotta want it bad, cause it’s gonna put up a fight. It’s gonna say ‘You want free speech? Let’s see you acknowledge a man whose words make your blood boil, and who’s standing center stage and advocating at the top of his lungs that which you would spend a lifetime opposing at the top of yours.’ You want to claim this land as the land of the free? Then the symbol of your country cannot just be a flag. The symbol also has to be one of its citizens exercising his right to burn that flag in protest. Now show me that, defend that, celebrate that in your classrooms. Then you can stand up and sing about the land of the free.”

On this Independence Day weekend, I challenge each of us to make a list of 5-10 things we can do in the weeks and months to come to make sure our voice is heard, and to support the companies and organizations who support freedom. My hats are off to companies like Kroger, Dick’s Sporting Goods and Apple who are already taking a stand to voice their support for freedom.

And of course, I’ll be wearing red, white and blue all weekend to be a visible beacon of freedom. How about you?

Karen

This week is the summer solstice, and for those of us in the Northern Hemisphere, it’s the longest day of the year. It is the unofficial launch of summer … and it makes me think of my two favorite, sweet summer fruits. Ironically, they are available around the longest day of the year—for a very SHORT amount of time. I think that plays into making them even more delectable.

Angelcots are a white-fleshed apricot grown in a small valley in northern California. You may be saying to yourself, “the only apricots I’ve ever had are dried, orange and kind of chewy.” Or, you may have had them from a can in syrup. That’s not what I’m talking about.

Traditional and dried apricots aren’t even remotely the same as the amazing white-fleshed heavenly apricots that are my favorite—thus the name, “Angel”cots. When our grower, Marty Maggiore, a second-generation farmer from Brentwood, Calif., first contacted us, we fell in love with him. He’s a true farmer, a little rough around the edges but passionate about his product. He grows three main products—sweet corn, cherries and Angelcots®—a trifecta of produce items that Mother Nature likes to fiddle with! Sweet corn success depends on heat coming at the right time … sweet cherries are susceptible to rain and hail … and both have a short window in late June and early July for peak season. You have to be a special, patient kind of person to be a farmer of such crops—and Marty is just that guy.

The sweet, small Angelcots Marty grows ripen on the tree and are always ready for harvest right at the peak of corn and cherry season. Poor Marty, he always has to scramble for labor to harvest his crops. (And often about the time the Angelcot fruit has set and there are small buds, we get a windstorm that blows a lot of the fruit off the trees.)

Well, this year, we lucked out! For the first time since we’ve been working together (more than 10 years now), we have a bumper crop! I am so excited to get to sample these Angelcots—they’re so juicy and flavorful that retail buyers literally stand in line to reserve the fruit before harvest.

Lychee Nuts (aka Litchi) are another unique taste sensation. They’re one of those fruits that we first started selling almost 40 years ago. I know this because our original lychee grower from Mexico—Gaspar—is still one of our suppliers! Gaspar started out as an eye doctor in Mexico but his family grew lychees. Way back then in the early 1980s, he flew to Los Angeles to meet with the only person who would talk to new growers of exotic fruits … my mother Frieda Caplan! We used to fly hundreds of boxes of his fruit during the only month fresh fruit was available—June. Last month we had a Zoom call with Gaspar, and it was so fun to be smiling at each other and reminiscing about his first visit to meet my mom at the L.A. Wholesale Produce Market. I had my eldest daughter Alex on the Zoom call with me and Gaspar had his son and daughter-in-law with him. It was truly a family affair!

Perhaps you have never tasted fresh lychee. Many people tell me the only lychee they’ve ever had is canned lychee that they get as dessert at a Chinese restaurant! All I can say is there is nothing like fresh lychee. As I walked our warehouse earlier this week, I snuck a few pieces of the fresh, spiky fruit and ate them over a trash can (as they are so juicy, you are literally covered in lychee juice as you peel the outside red skin and eat the translucent, white flesh). The super-sweet, tropical flavor is unmatched this time of year.

To grab a taste of these super-seasonal, limited summer fruits, you’ll need to hit the local stores just in time for July 4^th weekend to stock up. Buyer’s tip—if you are a Costco shopper, you should find our lychee in most Costco warehouses nationwide. The season is short, so grab them when you see them! For Angelcots, stores like Sprouts, Whole Foods and Kroger will have them nationwide.

I’d love it if you discover ways to experience these fleeting summer fruits. Let me know if your Angelcot and lychee experiences are as juicy and delicious as mine.

Enjoy!

Karen

Wow—it’s been almost 25 years since my dad passed away. Like most of us, I had a little bit of a love/hate relationship with my dad. He was great in so many ways and a really tough dad in other ways.

But, as the saying goes, it turns out he was the perfect dad for me.

My dad Alfred H. Caplan was born in 1918 in Chicago. He grew up during the Great Depression. He never graduated from high school, and actually caught a freight train from Chicago at age 13 and made his way to Los Angeles. As a minor, he lied about his age so he could enlist in the Marines.

My dad was truly a self-made man, full of determination. After the Marines, he went to work for the Longshoremen’s union (today called the International Longshoremen’s Association) and became a shop steward. Along the way, he was a truck driver. Through all that, he developed compassion for people, which is why he spent part of his early career being a union negotiator representing workers. As my parents told the story, there wasn’t a lot of money to be made working for the union, so he “switched sides” and started his own business as a labor relations consultant, representing management. He ended up receiving much recognition for his thought leadership from the scrap iron and metal industries, which comprised most of his clients.

He also represented farmers. In fact, it was my father who negotiated on behalf of most of the California table grape growers when they signed their first agreement with the United Farm Workers (UFW) and Cesar Chavez and Dolores Huerta in 1970.

Mom and dad visiting me in college in 1975.

I share this background because most people know about my mom’s history, but few know about my dad. My dad’s roots were in the working class. He could relate to them; they could relate to him. He valued an education because he never got a formal secondary education (he got a GED in the Marines because he never finished high school).

Not surprisingly, he was a cigarette and cigar smoker. And an alcoholic. But the day his first granddaughter was born in August 1964, he quit smoking and drinking cold turkey. He wanted to be around to see his kids and grandkids grow up. He became a fanatic about exercise (envision watching Jack LaLanne calisthenics on TV every morning), and adopted an incredibly restrictive, healthy diet from that point forward. He lived a full life, and passed away at the age of 79, in 1998.

As I look back to my childhood and think about the person I became and the life lessons I learned from my dad, I find it prophetic:

My dad was incredibly supportive of women and girls. After all, he supported my mom when she started Frieda’s in 1962, and he understood the long hours involved in running a start-up.
He had the original home office. So, it was Dad who got my sister and me up each morning and off to school (with the help of a nanny).
He taught me the value of personal responsibility, and discipline, and paying your own way … in fact, he made me pay him rent for staying at their house during my college summers, because I was working and had an income! It wasn’t a lot of money ($50 a month), but he didn’t believe in a free ride.
Although he helped me select my first car at age 16, he made me pay for it after he provided a small down payment. And if I couldn’t make the payments, he let me know that he would sell the car.
He believed strongly in being an active, voting citizen. For a short period of time, I was considering running for public office, but he cautioned me that it was a “dirty” business and to not pursue that. But, on every election day, both mom and dad took me and Jackie to their polling location so we could witness voting. He was active in local community organizations and made contributions to progressive causes and candidates.

I learned a lot from my dad about things to do, and not to do, when raising my own two daughters.

We each develop our own style when raising kids. And I’ve noticed that many of us chose to be the opposite of our own parents. As we are coming up on this weekend of celebrating Father’s Day, I want to make a suggestion.

No one had the perfect father. We all had imperfect fathers. So, perhaps a little forgiveness is in order, or at least a little understanding.

After so many years, I’ve realized that my dad was the perfect dad for me. Because he was the way he was, I turned out to be the way I am.

And that’s what I will be telling myself this Sunday when I think about my dad and all the fathers I know.

Hope you all have a pleasant Father’s Day!

Karen

Last week, I received a text from my dear friend Paula. Paula and I met on our first day of high school and have remained good friends ever since. Even after she and her husband Dave moved to Arizona a few years ago, we have found time to keep in touch and get together regularly. Here is the text I received:

“I received a call on Sunday notifying me that my (65-year-old) brother was found dead in his condo the day before. I am heartbroken and overwhelmed. It was unexpected, and I spent the last few days trying to figure out what happened and how to move forward. We don’t even know if he had a will and haven’t found one, so are trying to find a probate attorney … and a realtor …”

Heartbreaking, for sure. When a dear friend or relative experiences a loss like this, you can feel helpless. I do not wish that on anyone.

And that is why, after reading this article, I copied and distributed it to my kids. “Three Documents Your Kids Should Sign Before Leaving for College” was a perfectly timed reminder that I want to shout from the rooftops to all my friends and family that the greatest gift you can give to your family and heirs is to plan ahead.

It is relatively easy to create a:

1. Durable power of attorney

2. Advanced health care directive

3. HIPAA authorization

Yes, it forces you to think about your own mortality. I say this from personal experience, as it took me a woefully long time before I created my own living trust (my kids were already grown), which included a durable power of attorney, my advanced health care directive and HIPAA authorization.

It was unexpected three years ago when my mother Frieda fell and broke her leg at age 95. Thankfully, my mom was very thorough and responsible—she had already given my sister Jackie and me all of these documents for her, plus we were already signatories on all her bank accounts. At first when she approached us (more than 10 years ago) about adding our names to all her accounts and showing us all her home office files, it felt kind of creepy. Like, I didn’t want her to think that we wanted her to become incapacitated.

But, as usually happens, it was a freak accident that caused Jackie and I to “jump into action” and take care of everything for her.

So, how about you? And how about your kids? If your kids are college age, if something happens to them (like a car accident, drug overdose or other incident), without the above three forms, you will not be able to help them easily. And you will not have access to any of their accounts. And the same applies for you. If something happens to you, wouldn’t you want to have your spouse or family member be able to jump into action and know how to access all your passwords, direct your doctors, pay your bills, etc.?

The easiest way to do this is to locate a local estate planning attorney and pay a relatively small amount of money to get these basic documents in order.

My wish is that you never have to experience what my friend Paula is going through. So, take action now to plan ahead.

Karen

I’ve heard the saying “what gets measured, gets done” so many times that it subconsciously drives my life. I had a quick reminder of that earlier this week.

My partner Jack and I both use physical month-at-a-glance calendars to keep track of our physical goals and accomplishments. It starts in the month of December, when we both create our personal goals for the next year. The goals include many physical goals (weight, nightly hours of sleep, hours of exercise, resting heart rate, etc.) plus bucket-list and personal goals (# of rounds of golf, # of books read, and more).

On the first day of each month, we each tally our previous month and then sit down together after dinner to see how we did. We compare it to last year’s numbers, and then talk honestly about how we feel about the previous month. I know this may sound a little crazy and neurotic, but stick with me on this one.

This past Wednesday evening, we reviewed May’s calendar. It was disappointing for both of us. With Jack’s Keytruda cancer treatment, his endurance and stamina have definitely declined in the last 11 months. Thankfully, his final infusion will be on June 28 (yeah!) and we hope within a few months that his athletic energy will start to come back. But what was interesting was that my own performance metrics declined as well.

This May, my total exercise hours for the month was 13.5 hours (less than 30 minutes a day) vs. last May, which was close to an hour a day. And, I noticed a change in the one metric which I believe is the best indicator of my total health—my resting heart rate, which has risen from 63 in January to 67 in May.

So why is all of this measuring important, and does it make a difference in the quality of my life?

Long before Jack, I started daily vigorous exercise, because my doctor told me I needed to do cardio exercise “every day, for at least 30-75 minutes a day.” The most significant way it helped me was in dealing with the stress of human life. Whether it was pressure from work, family or my social circle, taking time to do vigorous exercise every day seemed to de-stress me. It was alone time for me, and because I took my iPad with me to the gym, I got to watch fun shows on Netflix or HBO. I literally got to check out from my regular life and take a break.

After six months of daily exercise (which also allowed me to sleep better at night, and eat a bit healthier), the doctor noted that I had lost about 5% of my body weight. It was a great feeling. But I wasn’t keeping track of exactly what I did … it was anecdotal.

So, two-and-a-half years ago, I made a list of what I felt were reasonable health and fitness goals—and what I could measure to help me accomplish them. My first draft of my goals was completely unrealistic. For example, I wrote down that I wanted to walk 10,000 steps a day. I thought that was a reasonable goal, since I’ve heard so many people talk about that number. Jack pointed out to me that if I have periodic travel, business trips, evening dinners, and full days of work, that reaching an average of 10,000 steps a day was a goal that I likely would not reach. And then I would feel defeated and disappointed in myself. So, he encouraged me to set my goal at 8,000 daily steps on average, which by the way, is 2.9 million steps for the year. That’s a lot of steps!

Lo and behold, I felt a sense of accomplishment when I exceeded my 8,000-step goal on a regular basis.

We can all be our biggest critic. In this case, my biggest lesson was to set myself up for success. Don’t be so hard on myself. Perhaps that is why New Year’s resolutions are so rarely accomplished, and most are discarded by February.

So, think about your own goals and what is really important to you. Perhaps it is taking one mini-vacation every quarter (that’s on my list). Or maybe it is learning a new sport (like golf or pickleball). What are sub-goals that will help you get there (pick a destination for your vacations and figure out what weekends will work, or find the closest pickleball court and find a friend to play with)? Then set a small goal to help it happen (plan to play once a month to see if you like it).

Here are some of the things I measure to improve my quality of life:

nightly hours of sleep
daily resting heart rate (which I take after my 20-minute daily meditation session)
number of steps a day
number of miles a day (thank you iPhone for tracking this via the Heart App)
number of times a month I see both my daughters (a constant reminder to check in with them)
number of days a month I drink wine (should be significantly less than the number of exercise days)
number of books I read (actually listen to, via Audible)
number of times a year I donate blood
total exercise hours (I track rowing, walking, Peloton, strength training, swimming)
friends who I want to keep in regular contact with (I review this list monthly)

So how about you? Are you looking to feel good physically and mentally? Are you looking to change it up a bit? How about making your own short list of health and well-being goals? And come up with a reasonable list of things to track (maybe 4-5). Find a way to track them daily and then, at the end of each month, do a check in with yourself (or get an accountability partner, which is always helpful).

I would love to hear what you’re tracking and doing, and if it’s helping your mood overall. Please do share!

Karen

Over the years, I have heard people comment about experiencing identity theft. Things like: Someone applies for unemployment benefits using your social security number, or they open a credit card or apply for a loan in your name, or—worst case—they take money out of your bank account and you are not able to recover it.

I have not experienced identity theft myself, but a very close friend of mine did last week, so I have witnessed the hassles and havoc secondhand. It is as if someone has broken into your car or home and stolen all your credit cards, bank statements, etc., but way worse. When it happens, you feel violated. Imagine all your credit cards being cancelled and not being able to access the cash in your bank account. It’s devastating.

I’ve learned there are several immediate action items I can personally take to lower my risk of the effects of identity theft to almost zero. And I wanted to share them with you with the hope that one or more of them will trigger you to take action.

Freeze (or lock) your credit on all three credit bureaus: Experian. Equifax. Transunion. I used to think it was overkill when my sister Jackie suggested I do that, but several years ago (after another friend had an issue) I locked my credit on all three websites, and I now sleep better at night. Even my own bank cannot do a credit check on me without contacting me to unlock my credit. Rest assured that you can unlock your credit for as short as one day. It’s your quickest insurance that you will always know if someone else is trying to be you.

Don’t click on text messages or emails that say they want to confirm a purchase on your credit card or bank account. If you are concerned that there might be a bogus charge, call the phone number on the back of your credit card to ask. If you suspect a phishing email, call your bank—most banks have a hotline to report phishing emails right on their website. I’ve reported phishing emails before. And beware of phone calls and voicemail messages with the same theme. They are likely frauds.

Don’t use the same password for multiple accounts and logins. I used to be guilty of this, but after Google alerted me last year that one of my multiuse passwords was compromised, I changed all of my passwords. Yes, it was a pain in the neck, but again, deep inside I knew it was an easy way for someone to hack into my accounts.

Get an online password manager. I am guilty of having all my passwords written down in a small black book that I carry everywhere. However, after this past week, I decided that I wanted to move into the 21^stcentury, and I have set up a www.dashlane.com account. Dashlane is just one of many top-rated online password manager programs. For reference, check out this recent article with more information on the top seven password managers. You can pick the one that’s best for you. I’m still a novice user on Dashlane, and although it can be a bit tedious to set up, I can tell it will make my life easier in the future. My friend who is an interior designer—who had over 200 logins and passwords to remember—told me that using Dashlane has made her life much less complicated.

If you are worried about mail or packages getting stolen from your mailbox or front porch, sign up with the local UPS store to be your address of record. My friend, who travels a lot, said it has been a lifesaver. Bonus: If you ever order wine (which requires an adult signature), there is always an adult over 21 at the UPS store.

Ronald Reagan jokingly coined the popular phrase, “I’m from the government and I’m here to help” (calling the phrase “the nine most terrifying words in the English language”) but, truly, there are two government websites set up to help with recovering from identity theft.

https://www.identitytheft.gov/#/

https://consumer.ftc.gov/features/identity-theft

I hope you picked up at least one new pointer to help you prevent identity theft. I would love to hear if you have other suggestions to share!

Karen

All four of my grandparents were born in Ukraine. In fact, up until February of this year, my distant cousin Vicki still lived there. She was fortunate enough to escape to rendezvous with her sister in Crete. She is in her mid-70s and will likely never be able to return to her homeland.

While my maternal grandfather Solomon was alive, I recall him traveling to Kiev (now Kyiv), and later showing us photos of a family gathering that was held during his visit. I still have those photos and planned many times of going to visit my cousin there … but alas, that will likely never happen.

So, you can imagine how helpless and heartbroken I feel when I watch the news about the war in Ukraine. For the last three months I have been thinking, what can I do?

Three things happened to me in the last few weeks that have made me feel that I can help.

First, I learned there is an International Committee of the Red Cross, based in Switzerland, and I made a financial contribution. ICRC has been working in Ukraine since 2014, so they were already in place on the ground when the conflict escalated. If you want to learn more and/or make a contribution, check it out: www.icrc.org

Second, when I visited a dear friend of mine two weeks ago, he had a Ukrainian flag flying outside his house. When I inquired about it, he offered to give me one—along with a flagpole—and earlier this week I mounted it on our house. To me, it is a sign of solidarity of support and caring for our friends in Ukraine.

Third, I received an email from a dear food friend, cookbook author Joan Nathan. She is an award-winning author, food activist and influencer. Here is her email, entitled, “Neighbors for Ukraine Dinners”:

Friends, we hope you will be as excited by this opportunity to host a

“Neighbors For Ukraine Dinner” as our neighbors were. Read on!

The Ukraine crisis has made so many of us realize how lucky we are and how quickly our comfortable lives can change.

The war in Ukraine has touched every person and every institution in that country. Since February 24th more than 4 million Ukrainians have fled their homes. Eastern Europe is overwhelmed with refugees—mainly women and children—who have little means to support their basic needs. Food and water are hard to obtain, especially in smaller towns and in the eastern part of the country that has borne the brunt of Russia’s brutal attacks. The fighting will not end. Violence will continue, but we can offer help by supporting organizations working in the field that provide a wide range of services to Ukraine in its hour of need.

In our neighborhoods, a few of us got together to brainstorm how to raise funds for the Ukrainian people by organizing cocktail receptions and dinners.

Last week, we had our first neighborhood gathering—a progressive dinner where we raised over $25,000, mostly for World Central Kitchen, but also for International Center for Journalists, and Tikva Children’s Home, an orphanage in Odessa. Below are suggestions for other charities. We envision “Neighbors for Ukraine Dinners” all over the country—and even the world. It is our hope that you might do this in your own way and most of all, have some fun while doing good.

Here is how we did it.

Invitations: Invite a few neighbors to brainstorm over a drink, dessert, or nothing but a glass of water. At the meeting decide date, time, hosts, charities, menu, and volunteers to help. Send out an email invitation … we used Paperless Post and one person handled responses. (See ours below.)

Locations: One neighborhood decided to have a progressive dinner where each course was hosted by a different person. Our menu included Ukrainian dishes: chicken kyiv, varenyky, and Ukrainian honey cake. We had so many wonderful neighbors participate that the main course had to be served at two houses. Johanna’s neighborhood had one dinner and a lower-level-donor cocktail party at another house.

Planning and cooking the meals: We all know people who love to cook and help, so finding volunteers was no challenge. A couple of days in advance, we prepped dumplings and chicken kyiv together—with Ukrainian immigrants—the most fun of the whole process for many of us. (Joan will give you recipes and menus if you want.) We managed to find local chefs, businesses, and entrepreneurs to donate time and resources to our event. (We hope to arrange for a couple of large companies who have stores nationally to continue to donate resources for other neighborhood dinners.) Sharing as we did not only strengthened our already terrific neighborhoods, but made it simple to execute and we all got to meet new people.

Donations: We asked everyone to donate at least $500 to the charity of their choice helping Ukraine. You pick a charity and set the minimum donation at any amount that you like. We used the honor system; you could also ask guests to tell you the amount they donated so you can announce and celebrate the total at your event.

It is important to note that whatever type of fundraiser you choose doesn’t have to be a three-course dinner. You could do a potluck, organize a meal swap, or offer to do meal delivery or pick up. Whatever you offer, the goal is to raise funds for a great cause.

The list of refugee and journalist organizations working in UKRAINE in alphabetical order you also might consider. These organizations have been vetted by individuals we trust—among others Nick Kristof, formerly of The New York Times.

DirectRelief: Ukraine Relief

Doctors Without Borders

HIAS, Hebrew Immigrant Aid Society

Institute for War & Peace Reporting

International Center for Journalists. ICFJ

International Medical Corps

International Rescue Committee, IRC

KIND (Kids in Need of Defense)

Tikva Children’s Home

World Central Kitchen

It seems as if everyone I talk with here in the U.S. and around the world is saddened and horrified by this war. I hope to inspire you to take some kind of action—whether it is flying a Ukranian flag or making a donation to provide relief to Ukranian refugees and survivors. Anything will help.

Thank you!

Karen

Mother’s Day has always been a special day for me, especially after I became a mother more than 32 years ago. After my eldest daughter Alex was born, my mom Frieda told me that the focus would now be on me as a mom, and she would come to my house. I always remember that.

So this year, with my grandson Eli being 17 months old, I happily offered to drive 70 miles to my daughter Alex’s house very early Sunday morning to spend time with them. I brought Alex flowers, took her and Eli to breakfast, and gifted her a massage to honor this special day. (My younger daughter Sophia had a cold, so didn’t want to share germs with us and stayed home.)

Sophia and me on FaceTime since we couldn’t visit in person.

I also learned something new that day. Alex sends hand-signed and mailed Mother’s Day cards to all of her “mom” friends! I’m talking more than 25 friends! Alex told me that she had started doing this a few years ago, as she feels that being a mom is something very special and wanted to celebrate all her friends. I smiled when she told me, as I have been doing the same thing for years. I wonder if she knows that we do the same thing? She probably doesn’t know that my own mom also sent Mother’s Day cards and flowers to special moms in her life!

It was later that afternoon that I learned an even more interesting Mother’s Day tradition. I was playing golf and stopped to chat with Gus, who runs the snack shop at our golf course. I asked him what his wife was doing that day for Mother’s Day. When he told me he had no idea, I must have looked a bit surprised. That’s when he shared with me the Mexican tradition for Mother’s Day—in Mexico Mother’s Day is always on May 10 (unlike our American holiday which is always on the second Sunday of May). Gus told me that he would be doing something special for his wife on Tuesday, May 10.

I asked my co-worker Margie more about Mexican Mother’s Day, as she is my go-to person on these kinds of things. Margie told me that in Mexico Mother’s Day is equally as important as a person’s birthday. She said traditionally mariachi bands are hired to serenade for Mother’s Day, a tradition that has been brought to parts of the U.S. In fact, she said that in Guadalajara, Mexico, (where her family is from) there are always advertisements to hire mariachi bands for May 10^th celebrations. She said that oftentimes you can hear them playing just after midnight to welcome in the Mother’s Day celebrations.

Colorful flowers are traditional gifts for mothers in Mexico, and many family members will take off work just to spend the day with their mothers. Since moms traditionally do the cooking in the family, the moms may cook for the day, but they will be surrounded by their entire family, who gathers to honor them and show them just how special they are!

As Margie and I were talking, one of our co-workers overheard us and told us that in his home country of Nicaragua, Mother’s Day is celebrated on May 30! And with a little help from the Internet, I learned that observance of Mother’s Day is different in many countries.

Most Americans might guess that Mother’s Day is a “Hallmark holiday” (i.e. created by the Hallmark company as a way to sell more greeting cards). When, in fact, I think Mother’s Day is an extremely meaningful and special day that is deserving of a pause and an outpouring of love and caring.

(Left) The best compliment a mom could ever receive (card from my daughter Alex) (Right) Alex, me and Eli at the park on Mother’s Day

For myself, I was overwhelmed with the number of texts I received from friends and family members wishing me a happy Mother’s Day. It always takes me by surprise when this happens, as I have no expectations.

But frankly, the card that touched me the most was the one that Alex gave me.

To all the moms out there—I hope you felt the love on Mother’s Day!

Karen

I like to think of myself as a trendsetter. But TikTok is one trend that’s eluded me. I admit it. I have never created a Tik Tok (video), and I have not downloaded the app.

TikTok, an app started in China in 2016 (then called Douyin), is a video-focused social network service owned by Chinese company ByteDance Ltd. It’s used for creating, sharing and discovering short videos. It’s no secret that people enjoy it as an outlet to express themselves through singing, dancing, comedy and lip-syncing—they create videos and share them across a community. Videos are usually from 15 seconds to 10 minutes long.

In researching TikTok, I found that its initial user base was young people between the ages of 12-13 years old. As with most social media platforms, TikTok began with early adopters who were young teens and then suddenly spread to anyone who wanted to be hip, trendy and influential. The fact that TikTok was a video platform caused it to go viral.

Each social media platform has a cohort that finds it especially appealing. LinkedIn is for business networking. Facebook is popular with baby boomers (and has probably reduced the need for high school reunions). Instagram is a must-have for millennials.

YouTube afforded a way to share videos. I recall the first YouTube video I ever saw, probably in 2010, was sent by a friend to view a tractor moving through a field in Indiana. My first impression was “who is going to watch that?” I never could have predicted how YouTube would change the way we solve everyday problems. Have a clogged toilet? You can go on YouTube to find out how to fix it. Want to know how to make your eye makeup and hair look a certain way? YouTube has the answer.

To understand TikTok, think YouTube and Instagram had a baby.

So, earlier this week one of my coworkers ran into my office to show me a TikTok that featured one of our most unique fruits—the Kahuna® Jackfruit. I was mildly interested in seeing it … until she played it for me.

It was not a TikTok produced by a 13-year-old—it was from the account of an adult woman named Deven Karpelman (@tequilaanddonuts is her handle). Oh yeah, and she has 850,000 followers. The TikTok below has 2.4 million views so far! Yes, 2.4 million.

Spoiler alert: She goes into a Costco in search of “adopting” a jackfruit and treats it as if it is a new member of her family. She straps it into her shopping cart, buys it some clothes (estimating it is a size 3T), and then buckles it into her car for the trip home.

You can see for yourself what is so hilarious and genuine about this TikTok. Click here to see how to Adopt a Jackfruit.

@tequilaanddonuts/TikTok

So, thank you Deven, aka @tequilaanddonuts for adopting a Frieda’s Kahuna® Jackfruit. And as she highlights, it’s “the original party fruit.” I think a jackfruit party may be in my future.

Karen

For the past two years, I have spent many hours each week on Zoom. Many of my team members work remotely, and oftentimes I am remote as well. Even when most of us were in the office during the peak of the pandemic, we would meet via videoconference on Zoom to avoid too many (masked) people gathering in a meeting room. Plus, in the nonwork organizations I am involved with, I have attended many board meetings, social gatherings or programs via Zoom.

I admit, Zoom fatigue is real. I always thought that it was the number of hours a day I was on Zoom calls that was causing the fatigue—combined with sitting at my desk chair for all those hours—vs. getting up and walking around between meetings.

Then I discovered the “Hide Self View” feature on Zoom. Did you know that you can hide your own self-view while on a Zoom meeting? It actually changes the entire dynamic of the Zoom experience when you are not staring at yourself all that time! And, of course, I can tell the effect on others who find looking at themselves distracting, as they are constantly adjusting their hair, moving their head to get a better angle of themselves on screen, etc.

Recently, I witnessed that hiding my self-view (even when I am on a one-to-one meeting) allows me to focus on the other person and the content of the meeting. I don’t feel so self-conscious about my hair or how my office background looks. I feel like I am in an actual meeting vs. having a meeting in front of a screen.

Two weeks ago, my business coach shared some astounding information with me after he attended the Wharton Future of Work Conference:

“Zoom fatigue” comes mostly from watching yourself on screen. Evidence-based studies show there is little correlation to the number of meetings or hours on Zoom as long as you’re not right on top of your video screen when in a meeting. It’s the watching of yourself that creates the “exhaustive” feelings. Click on the “Hide Self View” option on Zoom calls.
Women and newcomers to a company exhibited the greatest amounts of “Zoom fatigue.”

So, in case you are not aware of how to hide your self-view, here is a screenshot:

Try it for a few meetings and take note of your exhaustion levels. Also, when you are onboarding a new team member at your company, include instructions on how to hide self-view during Zoom meetings, as it will likely improve their user experience.

If you do not use Zoom, but instead use Microsoft Teams or other video conferencing tools where you cannot hide your self-view, try this pro tip I received from a candidate I interviewed earlier this week: put a Post-it on your computer screen to cover your own self-view. She told me it has the same positive effect!

So, as I get ready for another round of Zoom meetings, I feel less stressed because I know how to minimize the Zoom fatigue. Please let me know what your experience is after you try this tip! It may be a game-changer!

Karen

A few weeks ago, I attended the inaugural Executive Leadership Summit for the newly formed International Fresh Produce Association (United Fresh Produce Association and Produce Marketing Association merged as of January 1, 2022, and this was their official “launch event” as a single entity).

It was an invitation-only event and about 150 produce industry leaders attended. Young and old. Growers and distributors. Men and women representing all aspects of the food supply chain.

As with all mergers (whether non-profit or for-profit entities), there is a better chance of success if the merging of cultures is the highest priority. Everything gets done through people … and I’ve heard that more than 75% of all mergers fail due to a lack of alignment in culture. So, as an active industry member, I am optimistic of this merger’s success, as great care has been taken in merging staff, locations and priorities.

During this event, they reiterated the top four priorities for this merged association:

Advocacy (being active in Washington, D.C.)
Labor and talent (talent is everyone’s priority these days)
Business solutions for a sustainable future
Demand creation and growing consumption for a healthier world

It was the last priority that really got my attention. The luncheon speaker was an energetic chef-turned-evangelist for reducing nutrition insecurity. You’ve probably heard of food insecurity—lacking reliable access to a sufficient quantity of affordable food. What Chef Michel Nischan shared with us is the organization he started in 2007, Wholesome Wave, whose mission is to reduce nutrition insecurity. Nutrition insecurity is that state of not having access to nutritious food.

Quoting from the “What We Do” page of their website:

Food insecurity is about providing enough food to those in need. Nutrition insecurity is about providing the right food to prevent or alleviate diet-related diseases like diabetes, heart disease, hypertension, and obesity. With studies showing that diet-related diseases like diabetes and obesity are driving the highest hospitalization and death rates from COVID-19, it is now more important than ever to address nutrition insecurity head-on.

Michel co-founded this organization to address diet-related diseases by helping low-income Americans buy and eat healthy fruits and veggies. Most of us have heard about introducing fresh fruits and veggies to young children when their palates are young and their minds impressionable, hopefully creating positive eating and shopping habits for a lifetime. But we often forget that fresh produce is not always the most affordable food. Readymade pizza, pasta, fast food and other high-fat and high-carb foods are oftentimes the cheapest way to feed a family.

But, the long-term effect on one’s health, and the cost of health care that comes with those food choices, is not easy to understand. But all you have to do is look at the obesity map of the United States to see the impact, Adult Obesity in the U.S.:

So, what made Michel’s talk so exciting to me was his mention of “Food as Medicine.” I smiled when he said those words, food as medicine. Because more than 30 years ago, in the mid-1980s, I recall giving presentations and speeches with that title and talking about the health benefits of many of our specialties (like fresh turmeric and ginger).

Michel previewed for us two commercials which he produced highlighting a future when doctors would write prescriptions for fresh produce. Check out these two: one for broccoli and one for tomatoes.

(Plus, there’s a bonus audio commercial for bananas!) Listen here:

Nothing would make me happier than to know that physicians get adequate and ongoing nutritional education, so that when a patient has serious health concerns, the doctors’ first discussion is about the benefits of eating a primarily plant-based, fresh food diet—that they write a prescription for fresh produce.

FVRx

All I can think about is the long-term effects these produce prescriptions will have on our health care system, our longevity, our well-being and the planet. And our happiness. I guess that’s why when I am eating crunchy fresh vegetables or sweet fresh fruit that I feel happy!

Karen

Springtime brings that general feeling of refresh and renewal, and for me that means spring cleaning and handling odds and ends.

Because I am new to the area where I live, I asked my neighbor for a recommendation for a handyman. I had set the appointment weeks in advance, which led me to believe that he’s fairly busy—a good sign.

After taking time to carefully compile a long list, last week was finally the time to meet handyman Sean. I had never worked with him before, but in less than four hours Sean had completed my long things-to-do list. I was impressed.

Even more impressive was that as he was walking through the house, he made his own list of “future projects” he could assist with another time. Wow, talk about thinking like the customer! As I was writing him a check, he said, “I made some notes of little things around the house I could help you with. And, for the scratches on your walls, I suggest you go to Target or Lowe’s and pick up a box of Mr. Clean Magic Erasers.”

Never heard of them. I wrote it down.

A few days later, I was shopping in Nordstrom and went to the shoe department. I asked the department manager if he had anything to take the dark marks off my white-soled sneakers. He told me, “You should just go to Target and buy those Mr. Clean Magic Erasers—they will do the trick!”

Wow, two identical, independent recommendations for the same product.

So, off I went to Target.

Ladies and gentlemen, I might possibly be the only person on the planet who has never heard of Mr. Clean Magic Erasers, but I am telling you—they are amazing! With a little water, I was able to get all the scratches off the walls in my kitchen. I kept going and did some of the cabinets as well. This morning, before putting on my scuffed-up, white-soled sneakers, I grabbed a Magic Eraser and cleaned them too.

As they say, it’s the little things. I hope that if you haven’t heard of Mr. Clean Magic Erasers that you will buy a box for yourself soon. They will change your life … especially since it is spring cleaning time!

Karen

This week is very special for me and my family, as on Saturday, April 2, Frieda’s officially turns 60! Yes, it was 60 years ago that my mom Frieda opened her doors on the Los Angeles Wholesale Produce Market.

My sister Jackie and I were still little, but we sure remember mom getting up every morning around 1 a.m. to get ready for work, stopping in our shared bedroom to kiss us goodbye each and every morning.

We had no clue that 60 years ago it was quite unusual for a woman to own a business, let alone to drive to downtown Los Angeles at 2 a.m. to go to work. That’s just what she did.

Before she launched her own company, she started as a bookkeeper at Giumarra Brothers on the market. She took a special interest in a stack of fresh brown mushrooms that no one seemed to pay attention to. These special fungi would help to launch her career in sales! (Fun side note: When my sister Jackie was born, she was nicknamed “the mushroom baby”, as mom was pregnant with Jackie when she started selling mushrooms and visiting local mushroom farms.)

Frieda stood out as a woman on the market, as it was almost 100% men who worked there during that era. But, with her open-minded attitude, she stood out additionally because she would talk with every farmer, buyer, newspaper writer, or political candidate who braved the early morning hours of the L.A. Market. (I remember her telling me one afternoon in June of 1968 that candidate for President Robert F. Kennedy walked the produce market that morning, campaigning. She got his autograph. Later that week he was assassinated!)

When she launched her own company in 1962, she was given a new nickname “The Queen of Kiwi”, as she was the first to distribute and market kiwifruit into the United States. She actually is credited with changing the name of kiwifruit from its previous name, the Chinese gooseberry.

For the last 60 years, our company has been known for innovation.

Frieda’s has been an innovator of products (we have had a hand in introducing more than 200 new fruits and veggies to American shoppers). Did you know we represented growers and were the first to market: spaghetti squash, shallots, alfalfa sprouts, hothouse cucumbers, habanero chili peppers, Stokes Purple ® sweet potatoes, Asian pears … and the list goes on and on.

Frieda’s also became known for our innovation in packaging—my mom put the first label on a produce item (spaghetti squash). Frieda’s was the first to pack produce in an overwrap tray (Sunchokes®), as it extended the shelf life, plus it eliminated the confusion with fresh ginger root. And, we were the first company to put recipes on our packages! Fun fact: My mom did not know how to cook (I learned to cook at age 8). Perhaps because she did not know how to cook, she was able to tap into consumer sentiment and understand that consumers were much more likely to try something new if you show them how to enjoy it.

Frieda’s was considered the first brand in produce (with the exception of “Sunkist” stamping their name on oranges—no one else did that!). Our original brand was “Frieda’s Finest”, which we changed to “Frieda’s” in 1990 when Jackie and I bought the company from our parents.

As I reflect on how the produce business has changed in the last 60 years, I’m struck by how many things have really remained the same:

The produce industry is hard. It is a complex business and has many moving parts. Ask any farmer!
It’s a relationship business—people do business with people they like and trust. If someone wants to do business with you, they will find a way to make it happen. If someone does not want to do business with you, they will find reasons to not make it happen.
Building your business takes time—there are no overnight successes. Kiwifruit took 18 years to start to catch on—and to this day, growing the business takes hard work and time.
Taste wins! Except for bitter melon (which has medicinal qualities but an almost unpalatable bitterness), a good-tasting produce item is part of the winning strategy when selling fresh. Have a good-tasting product, a decent shelf-life, and plentiful supply—that is the trifecta.
Timing helps—kiwifruit was the first new fruit to be introduced in North America (in 1962) since the banana (in the 1870s). We still find there is an almost insatiable demand for new and good-tasting, healthy, fresh produce. Hmmm … guess that’s why we get asked, “What will be the next kiwifruit!?”

If mom were still alive, she would be amazed to see how far we’ve come, yet how many things have remained the same.

And she would have loved our latest, original 60^th anniversary cake recipe! Check it out! Our Pink Lemon Cake with Popjoys® Kumquat Zest, topped with a Stokes Purple® sweet potato frosting, is absolutely delicious!

Me, my daughter Alex, and my sister/ business partner Jackie, at our company anniversary celebration this week.

And so we say: Happy Anniversary! Just thinking about my mom, and how she broke through the glass ceiling of produce while changing the way America eats, brings a happy tear to my eye.

Karen

After months of masks on, masks off, travel, no travel… Jack and I were able to go on a thrice rescheduled Caribbean cruise last month.

In early February, once we confirmed that we could go on the cruise, I finally asked him which ports we would be visiting. When he told me we would be stopping for a day on the island of Roatan, Honduras, I got excited. “I have a couple of friends who live there now!”

So, thanks to Facebook, Messenger and Instagram, I was able to reach out immediately to my friend Natalie (and her husband Shannon).

A little backstory: Natalie worked in marketing for several large produce companies and Shannon was the publisher of a produce trade publication. They met while doing business together (he sold ads to her company). Natalie was a client of Shannon’s and they met at a business dinner. While some tough negotiations took place, there was no denying there were sparks. They joke that he made it his mission to forever make her a happy customer.

A few years later, they got married!

Natalie told me that while they were dating Shannon shared his “dream plan” with her, which was to one day “sell everything”, move to the tropics and open a dive shop. After she got certified in scuba diving, the dream became a shared one and they used dream planning sessions to think about these and other goals and dreams and their plan to make them a reality.

Fast-forward….they went on a diving vacation at New Year’s a couple of years ago, and then, got “locked down” in Roatan, Honduras, for a few weeks, thanks to the Pandemic. I remember seeing their post on Facebook and wondering what they would do, being stranded in a third-world country, and in my mind “cut off from civilization” for several weeks.

Well, as it turns out, they loved it! And it allowed them to realize that their shared dream could come true, as they could buy a dive shop in Roatan, find a place to rent, and move to a tropical paradise.

So, a few weeks ago, when our ship docked in Roatan, Omar their driver picked us up at the port and we drove to the SUN DIVERS dive shop in Half Moon Bay. And there was Natalie waiting for us when we arrived (Shannon was in the states on a short visit, so we missed seeing him during that trip).

It was fun watching her at their shop, and she was able to take a few hours off, and walk us through the small town they live in. That’s when she told us their story of moving to Roatan (one of three islands off the coast of Honduras). If you want to read more about their move and their life, you can read this short interview in the Entrepreneurs Section Forbes Magazine by John Greathouse (dated January 30, 2021).

The idea of “Dream Planning” was amazing to hear about—and it was inspiring to hear that Natalie and Shannon took action on their dreams. In fact, Natalie and Jack really hit it off, because the week following our trip, Jack’s 10^th book was due to be released. It is entitled “Jack Daly’s Life by Design” and shows people the step-by-step process that he created to live an amazing life. They definitely were comparing notes on the importance of dreaming, writing your dreams down, and … taking action! We had an awesome afternoon with Natalie, and I was so excited to get an official “Sun Divers” shirt before I left.

As I was leaving, I did ask Natalie what it was like when she went back for a visit to civilization. She told me after more than a year of only buying things she needed (like food), and not having a car, and enjoying plenty of quiet time by the water, that it was quite shocking to her system to go back to traffic, shopping malls and big supermarkets. It was sensory overload. And from the smile on her face, I could tell that she and Shannon were quite content in Roatan and will probably be living there for quite a while. Perhaps it’s good to go off the grid.

Have you ever considered doing dream planning with your partner or your family? It might be worth a try. You never know where you may end up.

Karen

P.S. If you want to learn how to design your life, you can check out Jack’s new book here:

Jack Daly’s Life By Design

Stress is real. You know what I mean—maybe your mind goes a million miles a minute or the stressors of the day seem to mount an attack before you can even get started. I know for me, in the rat race of the produce business (or any business, for that matter), the days can be long and filled with frenetic activity.

I think many people have a hard time sleeping at night or are restless when thinking about their next day, so they roll out of bed in the morning and rush to get to their day of work. That’s one way to handle stress.

But I’ve found a different way to start my day.

It’s a practice I started almost four years ago, and that is daily meditation.

A friend of mine shared an app with me at that time produced by Deepak Chopra in collaboration with Oprah Winfrey (Chopra Meditation & Well-being) and it is a 20-minute guided meditation. Perhaps you are aware that there are now many phone apps you can use to help with meditation, such as the Peloton app, Calm, Headspace, and mindful.org to name a few. I’ve found it makes meditation so much easier when you have a ready-to-use coach at hand (the app).

So, this is the way I start my day:

Alarm goes off at 5:00 a.m. My goal is to get up when the alarm goes off, but on occasion, I do hit the snooze button. But I’ve found I end up feeling more rested when I get up the first time the alarm goes off.
After brushing my teeth, etc., I start my pot of coffee. While the coffee is brewing, I do some simple and light stretching exercises for my hamstrings and feet.
Then I grab my cup of coffee, sit on the couch, and launch my meditation app. The Chopra app is about 10 minutes of introduction, then about 10 minutes of music, during which you repeat the mantra of the day in your head with your eyes closed.
When my meditation is complete, I open my eyes, and then take my resting heart rate on another app called “heart rate free”, which gives me a sense of my calmness level. Funny thing is, I can tell by my resting heart rate if I let my thoughts distract me during my meditation! If I was fully absorbed in my meditation practice, my heart rate is lower.

If you are looking for more calmness in your life and the opportunity to have some quiet time where your mind is free from thoughts, give meditation a try. With the plethora of apps available via our smart phones, it is actually super easy to implement. And, even though you may have to set your alarm 20–30 minutes earlier than usual to accommodate the period of time set aside for meditation, I think you will find that you start your day off with more energy, plus you’ll sleep better at night.

Ommmm…….

Karen

As I write today, I am sitting at a resort in Colorado Springs (The Broadmoor) for a global board meeting of the International Women’s Forum. The view is spectacular.

Our two days of board meetings are 3 ½ hours long (from 12 – 3:30 p.m. each day). That’s a long time to be sitting at a table, listening to speakers and presentations. Plus, some of our global board members could not make the trip, so we have at least 6 people joining us via Zoom. Even though the organizers of the meeting published all the background information in advance (with a perfectly timed agenda), it is still tempting look at my phone during the meeting.

So, this is the commitment I made to myself before the first meeting started: do not give into the temptation. I was committed to being fully present during the board meeting without checking my devices. And, thankfully, on the pre-printed agenda were breaks where I could check my notifications.

It made me think – what other places and times do I have that same challenge of being present and attempting to multitask? It is well-known that it is almost impossible to do two things WELL at the same time (think about those people who text while driving or walking).

Well, the obvious answer is during Zoom calls/meetings. If you are in business, or belong to an organization that uses Zoom, I’m guessing if the conversation topic or speaker is not exciting, you might turn off your camera so people can’t see you checking your email or your phone. So how does one make meetings – Zoom or in-person – super interesting and engaging? I have a few ideas about this:

Have a written agenda for every meeting. Make sure it is clear to everyone who is invited what the intended outcome is vs. allowing a free for all of socializing or random topics. And send the meeting agenda in advance.
Schedule meetings for the least amount of time needed. Those of us who use Outlook know the default for a meeting is usually 60 minutes. Does the meeting really need to be an hour? How about allocating the most minimal amount of time that you think the meeting could be, maybe for 25 minutes, 40 minutes, or even 15 minutes. I’m guessing participants will sense the meeting will be very focused so they will be more engaged.
Think carefully of who needs to be at the meeting. There is so much FOMO (Fear of Missing Out) or guilt, that we often times invite way too many people to a meeting just to keep people informed. Try inviting 6 people or less to the meeting (I have found the perfect size group is 6) and send out notes to anyone else who needs to know what was decided.
On Zoom, I usually request that everyone have their camera on. Isn’t that the point of Zoom rather than a conference call?

Truth be told, my blogpost today was inspired by an email I received early this morning. Just as I was thinking about how to stay present during my board meeting, a dear friend and speaker, Colette Carlson posted this article today on strategies for an impactful virtual meeting.

And, if you really want to score big with your coworkers, try ending a meeting early and give them the gift of a few extra minutes on their calendar. I’ve found this is a sure way to score points.

Karen

Last week, I was on a phone call with a business acquaintance, and he commented that he had found my blog on our company website. He said to me, “You come across like you are a business coach.”

That was such an interesting comment. I think he expected that my blog would be about the fresh produce that we sell.

So I gave him the backstory of why I started blogging. In late December 2009, I read an op-ed piece in USA Today by then-Whole Foods CEO, John Mackey. John got a lot of flak about his op-ed piece because he was talking from his personal opinion, not as the CEO of Whole Foods. He commented afterward that “a company CEO should be able to have their own personal voice separate from their CEO role.”

John’s comment inspired me. So, in late January of 2010, I launched my own blog, “What’s on Karen’s Plate?”—the name was suggested by our company marketing director.

In the beginning, I wrote about produce, two or three times a week. But, I got tired of sounding like I was pitching the produce my company sold, so occasionally I would write about things happening in my life. One time the title of my blog was “What it’s really like working with my sister”, and I got so many positive comments that I started to rethink what I would write about.

Over the years, I transitioned from writing about produce to writing about what was going on in my life. And my posts seemed to resonate with more and more people. One time I wrote about why I had to change my thyroid medicine, and several people wrote to me that they had the same experience.

A few weeks ago, I wrote about “Is the upside worth the downside?”, and I had several people email me or call me to say that they were able to use the information I shared in making a critical decision that week!

And I cannot tell you how many people write me notes, emails or texts saying that it feels like I am “in their head” when I write my blog.

That is what inspires me to write—knowing that what is going on in my life is most likely happening for others. Whether it is about kids, aging, health, business, continuous learning, fitness, love or friendship, I may be verbalizing what others are wondering about.

So, when I saw this quote in a friend’s newsletter, it completely resonated with me.

“If you can help people see themselves in your story, then you have a connection.”

-Muhammad Ali

So, am I a business coach? Or a life coach? Or am I just someone who wants to inspire others to live their best life?

Karen

When you read the name Kobe, there is no doubt that you know I’m referring to the late, great basketball legend Kobe Bryant. It still stuns me that it was 2 years ago this week that his private helicopter crashed into the hills of Calabasas, Calif., killing him, his 13-year-old daughter Gianna, and seven others.

Recently, I learned quite a bit about Kobe, after reading a book by his longtime coach Tim Grover. Tim’s book, Relentless is the story of how Tim, the son of Indian immigrant parents, leveraged his own drive and determination and convinced Michael Jordan—and eventually Kobe Bryant—that he could help them be better on the court. The only caveat? They had to do exactly what Tim told them to do. He guaranteed he would get results.

The key to Tim’s success as a strength and conditioning coach to Kobe Bryant, along with Michael Jordan, Dwayne Wade, and hundreds of other relentless competitors in sports, business, and every walk of life, was his brutal honesty and his own belief in himself as a coach.

As I read the book, I realized that Tim Grover’s coaching was not just physical coaching on the court; his coaching abilities were equally focused as a mental coach.

Kobe said it best:

“Tim Grover is the master of mental toughness. This book is the blueprint for discovering what you are capable of achieving, getting results you never imagined, reaching the highest level of success—and then going even higher.” —Kobe Bryant

It’s so interesting to me that there is no athlete in the world who would be where they are without a coach. But if you are not an athlete (and perhaps you are not a basketball fan), you might wonder why this book should be of interest to you.

Most sports teams are run better than businesses. How do they do it? They have a coach, they practice, and they have a playbook. You might think that Kobe Bryant, Michael Jordan, Tiger Woods, and Serena Williams have “natural talent” and that’s the way they got to where they are in their sports careers. But the fact is, they were relentless in their pursuit of their dream and used every tool imaginable to help them get there.

How about you? Do you have a dream? Whether it is professional or personal, what are you doing to achieve it? Do you have a coach? Do you practice? Is there a playbook that you know about, but are hesitant to follow (often because you want to do it “your way”)?

After listening to this book by Tim Grover, I was so impressed by how he characterized the most elite athletes he works with (he calls them “Cleaners”), and the secrets to their success and the behind-the-scenes reality of training them, that I have vowed to listen to this book once a month. That is 12 times this year.

Ever wonder how to be a superstar in your own life? Perhaps you might want to read or listen to Tim Grover’s Relentless. There are some amazing lessons there.

Karen

President Abraham Lincoln is famous for many quotes, one of which is:

“Give me six hours to chop down a tree and I will spend the first four sharpening the ax.”

What does that mean in a world where most of us are not chopping down trees? Well, for me it reminds me of the importance of keeping my skills sharp. How many times do you find yourself working hard at something, and deep inside you are thinking: “There has to be a better, faster way?” Or you might have noticed that things have changed in your business, and you are wondering why you don’t have the success that you used to.

I can relate this most easily to sales. What makes the best salesperson in the world? It’s not necessarily the most aggressive person, or the most persistent, but it’s likely the person who invests their own time in always improving their skills. It might be technical selling skills, it might be learning a better way to ask questions, it might be learning more about the industry in which you operate, or researching more about your own products, your competitors’ products, or what’s important to your customers.

I have found that many salespeople seem satisfied with their many years of experience as their main qualification or perceived competitive advantage. But, based on my experience, the most successful people in sales are not necessarily the ones who have been at it the longest.

Think about it—that would be like a Human Resources manager in 2022 saying, “I’ve been doing recruiting for 20 years and I know what works.” Anyone who has followed the news in the last year, and all the coverage of “the great resignation,” knows that if there is one area that has changed dramatically, it is in the area of recruiting and retaining talent.

The same applies in every field.

No matter what you do professionally, it would be dangerous to think that what got you there in your career would be the main driver in getting you to where you want to go in the future. All of us need to think of ways to “sharpen our ax.” Does that mean taking professional development courses? Enrolling in continuing education in your field? Going back to school for a certificate in an area of specialization? Or listening to podcasts, reading books, and talking to others who have progressed in their careers (and then asking them questions about what they did differently)?

The next time you are considering how you spend your time (on anything), think about preparation—in everything you do. Before you apply for a job, do research on the company. Before you call a customer, check out their LinkedIn profile or google them for recent articles.

It could even be as simple as taking inventory of what you have before you go shopping and making a list of what you need. Then go shopping.

Sharpening your ax is about doing enough preparation BEFORE you to the work, so that the job takes less time and goes smoothly. I know that sometimes it hard to have the discipline to make time to do the preparation beforehand.

What new skills do you wish you had? Is there a way to acquire those skills easily? What would it mean to you to have those skills?

Remember, keep your ax sharpened.

Karen

As we look back on 2021, we might be thinking about the delta variant of COVID, masking, toilet paper shortages, and working from home.

But for me, as I look back, I have to start with the goals I set for myself in December of 2020. I had some pretty aggressive goals around fitness, traveling, entertaining, and reading books (along with a few other things).

I started my annual goal-setting process in late 2019, so I have now been through two annual cycles. What I’ve learned is that written goal setting produces significant progress and accomplishment. Setting goals that are realistic with a tad bit of a stretch—and then tracking them daily—requires a lot of discipline, but for me it has been transformative.

I’ve accomplished so much more than I ever imagined possible. In our annual New Year’s card that we send to family, friends, and business colleagues, I’ve never received so many follow-up emails with comments like “I don’t know anyone who packs as much ‘living’ into life as you do!”

So here is a small “tale of the tape” as they say, of how I did against my goals:

Goal Completed

Sleep 7+ hours 7.92 avg hours

Work out 208 days a year 299 days (181 rowing days, 194 Peloton rides, plus walk/runs –I try to do at least 2 types a day)

Golf 36 rounds (3/month) 76 rounds (*Golf handicap dropped 3.3 strokes)

Meditate every day 363 days (missed 2)

Donate blood 6 times Donated 4 times

Run 2 half marathons Completed 2 half marathons + a 10K

Average 8,000 steps a day 3,852,322 steps (avg 10,554 a day)

Read 52 books Read 90 books

Write 250 handwritten notes Sent 511 handwritten notes

Family/Personal Goals

Saw my grandson Eli 31 times

Had dinners with family 29 times

Had 52 dress-up dinners with Jack and/or friends

Bucket List Items

Visited 2 Presidential Libraries (Nixon and Reagan)

Visited Athens, Greece (where I ran a 10K)

Visited all 5 National Parks in Utah

So how did you do against your goals? It’s possible that your goals were just in your mind and you didn’t write them down. What about giving it a try this year? Write them down! It’s not too late to set some goals for yourself.

I set goals in a few areas: physical (which includes exercise and sleep), social (dinners, connecting with friends and family), travel (trips), personal development (reading), and caring (giving blood, writing thank-you notes, and staying connected with friends and family). There is a balance of fun and challenge.

I purchase an “At-A-Glance” monthly calendar and track my goals daily. At the end of each month, I recap what I’ve done in the back of the calendar, so I can see how I am progressing. Many months, as I am tallying up my exercise or my sleep, I realize I didn’t do as well as I had wanted … so I can “course correct” for the following month. I weigh myself daily (to keep myself honest) and during that last week of the month, it’s amazing how much more disciplined I am with my food and exercise! Some months I lost a few pounds and sometimes my number was higher, but overall I lost 3 pounds during the year, which made me happy.

I plan to make 2022 my best year ever and have a long list of places to go and people to see. What about you? What do you want to accomplish this year?

Enjoy!

Karen

When I first heard the quote “Is the upside worth the downside?” I was struck by what a great piece of advice it offers.

Think about it. When you are evaluating whether to do something, you ask yourself, “Are the benefits I will gain MORE than what I am likely to lose?”

In fact, as I look back on the last week, I can tell you it was the single biggest help in making three significant decisions:

We had made plans to travel to Virginia many months ago to visit family for the holidays, which meant we would have been traveling last Monday through Thursday. With the Omicron variant starting to surge, and my partner Jack’s cancer infusion coming up on Monday January 3, we decided two days before Christmas to cancel/delay our trip. The upside (seeing family) was not worth the downside (risking getting COVID, and having to miss his cancer treatment).
For New Year’s Eve, we had made reservations at our favorite local restaurant—an early dinner by ourselves. Because it was so cold outside, we chose to make our reservations for inside the restaurant. But, when we woke up on New Year’s Eve, we decided to cancel the reservations and stay home alone and have a home-cooked meal and a very nice bottle of wine. Again, the upside (going out to celebrate the New Year) was not worth the downside (being exposed to a bunch of unmasked people in an enclosed, small restaurant). We sent a video to close friends and family in place of being able to gather in person — you can view it on Jack’s Facebook page here.
Last week at my office, we were interviewing many candidates for a variety of open positions. Our practice is to have at least three or four people interview every serious candidate, and then we meet afterward to debrief and discuss the candidate. We had an excellent candidate for a certain position and this person received fairly high marks from all after the individual interviews. However, because we ask for plusses and minuses and make the time for a robust discussion of each candidate, quite a few “red flags” came up in the discussion. And although this candidate had the qualifications for the position (and the position has been open for a significant amount of time), in the end, the group agreed that the upside was not worth the downside.

Finally, speaking of New Year’s Eve, we got up at 5:00 a.m. that morning and made the one-hour drive to a Southern California landmark—Potato Chip Rock in Ramona—and hiked two miles to the top of the mountain. The whole point of hiking up there is to jump out to stand on “the Chip” and take photos. There was not a crowd that morning (probably because it was sub-50 degrees), so the conditions were perfect. But, as Jack got ready to scale the last rock for the photo, his foot kept slipping due to the recent rains. After a few tries, he proclaimed, “The upside (being on the chip) is NOT worth the downside (slipping and falling).” So, we took this photo from another, less treacherous rock.

As you move into the new year, and have both personal and professional decisions to make, I hope you will pause and consider: Is the upside worth the downside? Perhaps it will be about attending a social gathering, taking a new job, changing your physical workout routine, or going to bed early to get more rest, vs. watching your favorite show. Or another decision or habit. It is a great exercise to ask yourself that question.

Hope you did something fun to welcome in the new year. Cheers to a fantastic 2022!

Karen

Earlier this week, I was meeting with one of my work colleagues and we got into a conversation about errors that are made at work. It’s not unusual for someone to say, “Well, I do it correctly 99% of the time.” For some people, that might seem like a pretty good ratio.

But when this came up in our conversation, I was reminded of the work I did more than 30 years ago studying and implementing TQM (Total Quality Management). The following list is discussed often when it comes to 99.99% quality:

Possible Outcomes of 99.99% Quality

What is the potential outcome if 99.99% is the quality metric standard?

119,760 income tax returns will be processed incorrectly this year.
144 incorrect medical procedures occur daily.
110,600 mismatched pairs of shoes will be shipped this year.
18 babies will be given to the wrong parents each day.
23,666 defective computers will be shipped this year.
22,792 pieces of mail will be mishandled in the next hour.
2,434,300 books will be sent in the next 12 months with the wrong cover.
20,000 incorrect drug prescriptions will be written in the next 12 months.
56,700 checks will be deducted from false bank accounts in the next hour.
567 pacemaker operations will be performed incorrectly this year.
315 entries in the most recent Webster’s New International Dictionary of the English Language (unabridged) will be misspelled.
69 malfunctioning ATMs will be installed in the next 12 months.
810 commercial airline flights would crash every month.
880,000 credit cards in circulation will turn out to have incorrect cardholder information on their magnetic strips.
2 million documents will be lost by the IRS this year.
2 plane landings daily at O’Hare International Airport in Chicago will be unsafe.

When we consider the implications in medical procedures or commercial airline flights, it puts things in perspective.

What is your expectation for yourself and for others when it comes to accomplishing tasks? Whether it is at home or work, or with family, friends or coworkers, we set the standard in terms of acceptable expectations with our own self-standards.

I know that I oftentimes drive my coworkers and family crazy with my goal of 100% accuracy—but after reviewing this list, perhaps they will understand why I ask so many questions and strive for 100%.

So, as you transition this week into another year, perhaps you will consider what percentage of accuracy and accomplishment are acceptable to you. What will you tolerate?

Wishing you a Happy and Healthy New Year!

And I didn’t imagine ever saying this … I am actually looking forward to seeing the Rose Parade in Pasadena, CA, this Saturday morning, after it was cancelled last year. It will make me feel like things are getting back to normal!

Karen

About this time last year, I wrote about visiting the Richard Nixon Presidential Library in Yorba Linda, CA. Due to COVID, the library was only partially open to visitors, so that visit left me with the feeling that I should return to see more.

So during this past year, I not only visited the Nixon Presidential Library for a second time, but I also made the trek to the Ronald Reagan Presidential Library in Simi Valley, CA (a two-hour drive from where I live).

What a contrast! The Nixon Library is tucked in a heavily residential area, and is a popular venue for weddings, proms and other events. The teeny-tiny home where Richard Nixon and his four brothers grew up in are part of the Presidential Library complex. You get the feeling of Nixon’s humble beginnings. And through the permanent exhibits, I got a real feeling about the challenges of Nixon’s Presidency and the world in which he had to function as the leader of the free world.

In contrast, the Reagan Presidential Library sits on more than 100 acres and the main building is an enormous Spanish-style hacienda surrounded by gardens, plus both Reagan and his beloved wife Nancy, are buried there. There is a replica of the Oval Office with a curious twist. According to our tour guide, when President Reagan came to visit the Presidential Library while it was being built, he commented that the ceiling wasn’t high enough and he wanted it to be an actual replica of the real Oval Office in The White House. So, the architect measured it, and indeed it was a few inches too short! So, the replica Oval Office was modified with a couple of steps down leading into the Oval Office, so that the ceiling was at the proper height (and when you exit, you walk up a short ramp, to put you back at the level of the rest of the museum).

But, the most magnificent part of the Reagan Library is the pavilion in which Air Force One is displayed. More than one-half of the room is glass, so that it appears (if you use your imagination) as if the plane is ready for takeoff. It is truly breathtaking to see the airplane, which carried several presidents and their entourages around the world. Frankly, it appears much less techy and fancy than the images you see on television.

As I walked through the many exhibits at the Reagan Library that were open that day, I was struck by exactly how numerous the challenges are that a sitting President faces on any given day. Literally, I turned to Jack while we were walking through one of the galleries at the Reagan Library and commented on how incredible the amount of pressure was and how many big decisions needed to be made by the sitting President—it was quite daunting.

Philosopher George Santayana is credited with saying, “Those who cannot remember the past are condemned to repeat it.”

I find studying history is most interesting and memorable, and I believe there is a great opportunity to learn lessons from the past. And it seems so much more real to me when I do it through the lens of people. That must be why I like biographies and autobiographies so much.

Visiting the Presidential Libraries allows me to learn about our own American history through the eyes of Presidents, past and present. One of the surprises for me was that there is so much more on display in addition to memorabilia of the President. There are temporary exhibits including other presidents, world events, books, movies and more. Most of the Presidential Libraries are set up for students to visit and to be a learning lab. And just like when you visit Washington, D.C., and our nation’s capitol for the first time—including all the monuments and museums—you leave with a new appreciation of our nation’s roots and the complicated journey over the past 200-plus years.

And so it has been for me. I’ve been able to relive the era around Nixon’s Presidency (1969–1974) and Reagan’s Presidency (1981–1989) from the time I was still in elementary school through when I gave birth to my first child.

The added bonus? While at the Nixon Library, there was an exhibit highlighting books on all the Presidents. I snapped a photo of one, which I read last week titled, Team of Five: The Presidents Club in the Age of Trump by Kate Anderson Brower. Brower is a No. 1 New York Times bestselling author, and this book looks at the relationships between members of the Presidents Club and includes an Oval Office interview with President Trump. The “Presidents Club” is made up of the living Presidents and is an informal, yet important support group for the current acting President of the United States. The book was fascinating, as she spoke specifically about the personal and professional relationships between former Presidents Carter, Bush 41, Obama, Bush 43, and Clinton (jokingly called Bush 42 due to his close personal relationship with George H.W. Bush after they both left office) along with insights from her personal interview with Trump while in office.

So, as you are making travel plans for 2022, I encourage you make time to visit one of these amazing fifteen repositories of American History that represent these Presidents:

Herbert Hoover – West Branch, IA

Franklin D. Roosevelt – Hyde Park, NY

Harry S. Truman – Independence, MO

Dwight D. Eisenhower – Abilene, KS

John F. Kennedy – Boston, MA

Lyndon B. Johnson – Austin, TX

Richard Nixon – Yorba Linda, CA

Gerald Ford – Ann Arbor and Grand Rapids, MI (two separate locations)

Jimmy Carter – Atlanta, GA

Ronald Reagan – Simi Valley, CA

George H. Bush – College Station, TX

William J. Clinton – Little Rock, AR

George W. Bush – Dallas, TX

Barack Obama – Hoffman Estates, IL

Can’t wait to learn more history this next year when I visit at least a couple more!

Karen

I admit to falling for many of those ads I see whenever I am on Instagram, Facebook, browsing the internet or reading an online article.

However, some of my best new gift ideas have come from referrals from friends.

And so, as you are doing last-minute shopping for holiday gifts, here are several of my favorites:

ONDO socks: Once I tried these thin, no slip socks, I was hooked! When I wear non-running sneakers or loafers, I like to wear a light sock, as it makes the shoes more comfortable and eliminates the sweaty, sticky feeling. And they really DO NOT slip! They come in a few colors, and I’ve even gifted them to a few friends and houseguests.

VASTITCH Comfortable Leggings: For many of the holidays (St. Patrick’s Day, Halloween, Valentine’s Day, etc.) it’s fun to dress up. I have found the easiest way to dress up is with my exercise outfits, and it’s so easy since I found this website. Instead of trying to find decorative sweaters or T-shirts, now when I go for a run on a weekend near a Hallmark holiday, I go into my drawer and choose a color-coordinated pair of leggings. They make a perfect gift and ARE super comfortable.

ETSY for wine bags: Have you ever been going to a friend’s home for a party and want to bring a bottle of wine? You want to wrap it, and look all over for a wine bag. What’s a neutral color scheme that doesn’t look like you are reusing a wine bag from Christmas when it’s for a housewarming gift? Well check out this designer.

Etsy (an American e-commerce company focused on handmade or vintage items and craft supplies) is where many independent artists sell their wares. I was looking for personalized wine bags last year and came across this woman in Florida who makes custom-printed canvas wine bags and delivers them quickly with an incredible personal touch. Heyar (the owner), whose Etsy handle is Socialholic, is so busy that she is taking a break from new orders until January 3—but check out her offerings after the new year.

VISTAPRINT for address labels: One of the most surprising and appreciated gifts I ever received was when my dear friend Miriam sent me 10-20 postage stamps with a red heart on them! Miriam knows that I am all about love, and that I write a lot of handwritten notes, so postage stamps with a heart on them was a perfect gift for me! And we all know you can never have enough stamps handy … so, what about gifting a friend some custom-designed return address labels? Professionally printed address labels plus a page of postage stamps is the perfect gift.

I would love to learn about your favorite go-to or signature gifts. We all have them! Perhaps they are a brand of candles or stationery.

Gifts this year don’t have to be expensive, but they should come from the heart!

Enjoy!

Karen

It’s no secret that I read a lot of books. Let me correct that—I listen to a lot of books. With my 45-minute commute each way to work, I have found the perfect way to fill that time with something useful—listening to books.

In 2020, I listened to 52 books during the year and so far in 2021, I am at 84 books. I know that sounds like a lot (it is), but it is amazing that the 90 minutes of commuting each day, plus some extra time when I go to doctors’ appointments or visit friends, allows me to finish so many books. Last month, while on our cruise, I actually read three printed books, which I carried with me in my luggage.

With so many books under my belt, there are always a few standouts that I like to share with friends. So, in the hope that you’ll consider adding Audible to your mobile device or have a Kindle, here are my top recommendations from 2021 for you to consider adding to your reading list for 2022:

Autobiographies or Biographies (I love reading peoples’ stories):

Still Foolin’ ‘Em: Where I’ve Been, Where I’m Going, and Where the Hell Are my Keys.Narrated by Billy Crystal, the chapters alternate with actual comedy gigs, and his life story.
Beginner’s Mind by Yo-Yo Ma. I didn’t know anything about Yo-Yo’s life history or his story. It’s a short read but really made me want to go to one of his concerts.
Ladyparts by Deborah Copaken. Through every health challenge imaginable and a lot of laughter (she’s a comedian) and positive thinking, the author narrates this book and keeps you both laughing and in amazement.
A Runner’s High: My Life in Motion by Dean Karnazes. The story of the ultramarathoning legend, I literally would find places to drive or walk while I was listening to this incredibly inspiring story so it wouldn’t stop.

Business Books:

The Checklist Manifesto: How to Get Things Right by Atul Gawande. The author is a doctor who helped create the modern operating room checklist for surgery published and promoted by the World Health Organization (WHO). Examples of checklist usage by airplane pilots and surgery doctors made me realize how important and time-saving systems and processes are.
Get A Grip: An Entrepreneurial Fable—Your Journey to Get Real, Get Simple, and Get Results by Gino Wickman. Similar to the fable approach that Patrick Lencioni used in The Five Dysfunctions of a Team, I had my entire management team read this book and we continue to discuss lessons from it.

Life Lessons:

Make Your Next Shot Your Best Shot: The Secret to Playing Great Golf by Dr. Bob Rotella. He is America’s preeminent sports psychologist, and this book helped me keep my head in the game.
The Splendid and the Vile: Saga of Churchill, Family, and Defiance During the Blitz by Erik Larson. The story of Winston Churchill during one year of World War II … Talk about having a vision and believing.

Health:

Wheat Belly by William Davis, MD. This book has been on my list for a few years, recommended by a friend. I eliminated wheat from my diet after reading this book last month and it has helped me feel healthier, sleep better, have less aches and pains and, oh yeah, lose a few pounds.

Fiction:

Snow Flower and the Secret Fan by Lisa See. Truth: Lisa is a personal friend of mine. I could not believe I had never read one of her books (she is a world-renowned writer and author). The storyline was fascinating about lifelong friendships and reminded me that you never know someone else’s story.

Do you have books you’d like to recommend to me? I would love that. Almost every single book on my list above was an unsolicited recommendation from a friend.

Karen

Anyone who has gone out to eat with me knows that as soon as we are seated and the server comes to our table, the first three words out of my mouth are always, “What’s your name?”

I think years ago my two daughters were embarrassed by my question. But as they have grown older and wiser, I think they agree that by asking the server’s name, you establish a closer connection.

I’ve found 100% of the time that once I know the server’s name, I find ways to use it. I thank them for taking my order, for bringing me my drink, for refilling my water, etc. And with this more authentic, personal connection—using their first name—I always get better service. My party seems to get more attention and when we leave, it feels like we had a superior experience.

Sometimes, the server will ask me my name in return! That always catches me off guard, but when they use my name when addressing me, my positive experience is significantly increased.

So, that made me think, how could other businesses or positions leverage using someone’s name?

For example, when I go to the doctor, it would make a positive difference for me if the receptionist or nurse would introduce themselves: “Hello, I’m Sandra and I am the doctor’s nurse. I will be taking you to your examination room, but first I need to get your vitals.” Surely that’s a lot better than barking out my name from the waiting room and then, after a walk down a long hallway, them indicating to me to sit down to get my blood pressure taken or get my weight.

Or, when I arrive at a restaurant, wouldn’t it enhance my experience to have the person at the host station say, “Hello Ms. Caplan, so happy to have you with us this evening. I am Thomas and I am checking to make sure your table is ready. It will be my pleasure to take you there now! Please follow me.”?

Some organizations depend on name tags to do the job. Did you know that the proper side to wear your name badge on is your RIGHT side? That’s because when shaking a person’s hand it is easiest to read a tag/label on the right. Most people put it on the left side and oftentimes it’s covered by a lapel or long hair, making it difficult to read. And don’t get me started on those companies who put no thought into the typeface size or ease of legibility on name tags. But, why depend on a name tag? I think it’s better to properly introduce yourself verbally.

I went to a small holiday party last week and there were no name tags. The gathering was in a person’s home and there were only a dozen people. But some people were new to the group and others hadn’t seen each other for a long time. Frankly, I didn’t remember everyone’s name and had to whisper to a friend and ask. I personally think that even in these kinds of personal settings, it is a gesture of kindness to your guests to prepare name tags, if only with the person’s first name, printed in large, easy-to-read lettering. Then have guests apply it on the right side.

So, the next time you go someplace, try it out. Ask the persons’ name—no matter where you are. It will make them feel more important, and you will probably have a better experience.

“A person’s name is to him or her the sweetest and most important sound in any language.” —Dale Carnegie

Karen

Did you know that the first “marathon” was run in Greece? Yes, the idea for a modern marathon was inspired by an ancient Greek messenger who raced from the battlefield site of Marathon (a city in Greece) to Athens, a distance of about 40 kilometers or nearly 25 miles, with the news of an important Greek victory over an invading army of Persians in 490 BCE. As the legend goes, after the long run and making his announcement “We won!”, he collapsed and died (please note, there were other complications). You can read the historical details of the marathon race here.

So why am I writing about the Athens Marathon? Because on Sunday, November 14, I got to watch my partner Jack finish his 100^th marathon, when he completed the famed Athens Marathon. Let me repeat that—he completed his 100^th marathon! It’s almost impossible to comprehend someone running 100 marathons, but that’s what he did—completed a race of 26.2 miles (or 42 kilometers) 100 times! That’s a lot of miles on your feet!

Although the run was delayed by a year (due to COVID travel restrictions), the anticipation, training and excitement of traveling to Greece for my first time was amazing. Frankly, with all the ups and downs of vaccinations, travel restrictions, work responsibilities, etc., the trip didn’t seem real until we boarded our flight at LAX on Monday November 1.

We did have time to tour Athens, including a hike up to visit the Acropolis, the Parthenon, the New Acropolis Museum (gorgeous and amazing), the National Archeological Museum and more. After two days in the city, we boarded a cruise ship to spend eight days visiting ports in Greece, Sicily and Sardinia (both now part of Italy) and ended in Barcelona, Spain. And then we flew back to Athens to prep for the marathon.

As you may recall, I have been running/walking and completed four half marathons during COVID, so when Jack casually mentioned that I should sign up to run the Athens 10K the day before his marathon, I readily agreed. However, as it turns out, I did minimal training for the 10K. But I think I had enough walking and running miles from the last few months, that after extensive stretching the day of the 10K (as my leg muscles were quite tight from all the travel), I got dressed and we walked over to the starting line for a 5 p.m. start. Yes, the 10K was run the night before the marathon. It was exhilarating to line up with almost 10,000 other runners from around the world. Lots of selfies, lots of warm-up and so many different languages being spoken!

But the best part of running the Athens 10K was that the finish of the race was run into the Olympic Stadium. THE Olympic stadium! When full, the all-marble stadium seats more than 69,000 people (it is home to two of the biggest sports clubs in Greece). Due to COVID restrictions, there were probably less than 5,000 people when I ran into the stadium, but the bright lights and the finisher clock were motivating and rewarding! Plus, spectators are lined up throughout the route cheering you on. As I got ready to enter the Panathenaic Olympic Stadium hundreds of complete strangers were cheering “BRAVO! BRAVO!”, which definitely made that last quarter mile more bearable.

Sweaty me after completing the 10K and receiving my medal.

But the real treat was witnessing the more than 10,000 runners who ran the full 42K (26.2 mile) marathon. Although running the AUTHENTIC Athens Marathon (they call it the “authentic”, aka the “original”) is on many runners’ bucket lists, it is not as sexy or fun as one might imagine. First of all, you get bussed 26 miles to the outskirts of Athens to the rustic farming community near Marathon at 6 o’clock in the morning. There are no crowds, no music, no scenery. You wait around for two hours in the chilly weather until the race starts at 9 a.m. And then the first 18 miles of the running route back to Athens is uphill, which can be especially hard.

But I am guessing the excitement of completing a more than 25-year journey of running marathons, and knowing you are finally at the finish line—so to speak—kept Jack motivated and excited!

I waited at the finish line (inside the Panathenaic Olympic Stadium) for Jack until I saw him enter. I had been standing there for about an hour (his finish time was just 6 hours), and noticed that when some runners entered the stadium, their kids, grandkids and some family members somehow were running with the marathoners to the finish line. And then I discovered that the small area where I was standing had a movable “fence”—and after watching a few other people “sneak” onto the track (and they didn’t get arrested or bothered by the police)—I decided to make my break when Jack entered the arena.

As I stood there with my phone (camera) to catch a photo of him, I could see him looking for me in the stands (I had texted him that I was there) but he couldn’t find me. Until he saw me on the track! When he ran to where I was standing, I was able to run with him the last 100 yards or so to cross the finish line together. Talk about a feeling of elation!

Jack when he spotted me on the track in front of him. Jack and I with our finisher medals.

As I reflect upon how I ended up running the Athens 10K and Jack running his 100^th marathon, I can’t help but think about the importance of goal setting. And how those goals can evolve over time. My first 5K was more than 20 years ago. One and done. I never thought I would be physically able to run a 10K, let alone four half marathons in the last 18 months. But, I put them on my annual goal list, starting in 2020, and then again in 2021. I knew to complete them, I would have to train on a regular basis. So, I started tracking my running and walking daily and monthly, and I am able to hold myself accountable for what I set out to do at the beginning of the year.

Jack ran his first marathon at age 46, with no goal in mind. He then entered and ran a few more marathons before he saw a fellow runner with a “Ran All 50 State Marathons” on a t-shirt. He caught up with the runner and asked him about it. The runner told him there is an online “tracker” where you can register your runs and become one of less than 1,000 runners who have completed marathons in all 50 states. So, he set that as a goal.

Jack completed his 50^th state marathon in New Jersey a few years ago, along with completing marathons on all 7 continents (another goal).

Now, at age 72, he can finally cross those marathons off his bucket list.

Do you have a bucket list? How about an annual goals list (please do not call them new years’ resolutions). Does your goal list include fitness goals? As we enter December, you might be thinking about what you want to set as goals for yourself for 2022. Perhaps you might consider adding a few fitness goals. So many people put on their goal list how much weight they want to lose. And most of us lose enthusiasm for that within a month or two. What about shifting your focus to fitness?

How about weekly or monthly fitness goals? # of times you exercise each week. # of Peloton rides. Average resting heart rate. # of rounds of golf or tennis. # of hours of sleep each night.

These are just some of the goals I have set for 2022. I’d love to hear what your goals are!

Karen

P.S. I was pleased to hear that the 100th marathon was Jack’s last. After a few weeks, Jack set a new goal for 2022: run a half marathon (13.2 miles) each week for the whole year! What a crazy (but fit) guy!

Like the rest of the world, my travel schedule came to a grinding halt 18 months ago. Thanks to COVID, all my business trips were cancelled, as clients were no longer taking in-person meetings. Plus, my personal/vacation travel was curtailed heavily, although my partner Jack and I did sneak in quite a few short trips in 2020 and 2021.

During the past couple of months, I’ve noticed an easing of meeting restrictions, so this past week I took both a personal trip (to Las Vegas) and my first short business trip.

My overall feeling was: Geez, I need to find my travel rhythm again.

For those of you who used to travel regularly, you probably know what I mean. I used to keep my toiletries and make-up packed and ready to go, which made packing for a two or three-day trip super easy. On my first trip this past weekend, I found I needed to reload my toiletries case… darn it, I was out of the travel-size toothpaste, make-up remover, etc.

And selecting clothes for my two-day business trip took me much longer than usual. Then I remembered a travel tip I learned from a magazine: Just pick one color scheme for all business trips so everything is interchangeable. Ever wonder why so many people wear all black or all navy when they travel for business? Well, that’s why! Everything is mix and match, and you don’t have to pack as many clothes and shoes, allowing you to fit everything into a carry-on luggage.

And how about getting to the airport? I was very worried about how long it would take to get through security, even though I have TSA pre-check. So, I got to the airport two hours before my flight. Turns out, TSA has gotten fairly efficient, and it actually took much less time than pre-COVID. I found myself on all flights with tons of time before departure.

So, what to do with that extra hour or so? I read. That’s because I always save up all my reading materials for when I am taking flights. I get about 10-15 magazines and newspapers each month, both at home and at work, and I never seem to have the time to read them during my regular weekly schedule. So, I let them pile up.

When I’m getting ready for a trip, I put all my reading in a tote for my flights. I used to stuff them into a rolling briefcase, but it was terribly bulky and heavy. Now I actually put them in a burlap tote or reusable shopping bag. I know it may not appear too classy or business-like to get on a plane with a shopping bag stuffed with reading. However, on a two- or three-hour flight I can usually get through at least half of my reading, and I am thrilled to be able to pass them off to the flight attendants as trash (or many times the flight attendants enjoy reading the magazines).

I used to purchase food at the airport to eat during the flight so I was not dependent on in-flight food and beverage offerings. But, since resuming travel again, I have started bringing my own healthy snacks from home. Nuts and protein bars are my go-to. That means all I need to purchase at the airport is bottled water. I know that one of the ways to make sure you feel good during and after a flight is to drink plenty of water to stay hydrated. I’m not really good at remembering to bring a refillable water bottle (which would be the best environmental choice), so I frequently purchase a large bottle of water at my airport of departure.

This week one of my trips took me through the Phoenix Sky Harbor Airport. As you can see from the photo below, airline traffic and passenger levels are back to pre-pandemic levels. Most of my flights were 100% filled with no empty seats.

And although at first I was skeptical about the need to use the alcohol wipes that the airlines handed out when I boarded to wipe down my seatbelt, travel table, and all contact surfaces, I noticed that my seatmates used the wipes with no shame, so I have now started to do the same. And, of course, all passengers and flight attendants are wearing masks in flight. The threat of permanent expulsion from airlines for not masking has made it an easy choice.

So, as you get ready for your next (or first) trip, I hope you get your rhythm back right away. I’m happy the cover for my iPhone allows me to store my driver’s license and one credit card, so I don’t even need to get into my purse when I travel.

And in case you’re panicked about whether you’ll need to update your driver’s license with a REAL ID this year—don’t fret! We just got notice yesterday that REAL ID won’t be required until 2023. Hallelujah! I was even happier to learn that you don’t have to go to the DMV to get your REAL ID—you can go to AAA, and they will take care of it for you.

Phoenix Sky Harbor airport on Monday morning

Safe Travels!

Karen

PS I will be traveling on vacation for the next two weeks, so my next blogpost will be Friday, November 19^th.

Lately I’ve noticed at the end of some days, or after a long weekend, that I don’t feel like I accomplished anything. Do you ever get that feeling?

In the past, I’ve been pretty diligent about making a “things to do” list for work. But lately, I’ve noticed that I’ve gotten a bit lazy. I used to start my week by writing a list of my biggest projects or important meetings to accomplish for the week, crossing items off my list as I complete them, and adding more as the week goes on. I number my list, as I love to see a long list of things to do and get great pleasure in crossing things off. It actually gives me a feeling of accomplishment.

And, over the years, I’ve used this same technique in my personal life, making “things to do” lists each Saturday morning to make sure I don’t forget any of those errands and projects I need to complete on the weekend. But after this past weekend, I had to ask myself, why do I feel so draggy? I’ve stopped making my weekend list and keep forgetting to do things, like pick up my prescription at the pharmacy.

Why is this happening to me?

Well, as it turns out, I am not the only one experiencing this. In this Forbes article my feelings were confirmed that the pandemic has created a new kind of burnout. As I read this article about the ebb and flow of peoples’ motivation and productivity during the last 18 months—including leaders and executives like myself—I started to see the light at the end of the tunnel. The yo-yo effect of good news followed by bad news has worn me down. And being worn down has caused me not to follow my standard practice of making a list of things to do, and it has also caused me to be more tired than usual each evening. I have noticed that I am looking toward the bedroom closer to 8:30 p.m. each evening and getting at least 8 hours of sleep is the norm now.

And even my daily practice of exercise, whether it is a long run at the beach, rowing, or taking a class on the Peloton, has lost some of its appeal.

But frankly, reading that others are experiencing this made me feel better. It’s not just me.

Once I recognized that I have an issue and labeled it (burnout), I suddenly feel like I can overcome it.

How about you? Have you been struggling with work-life balance? By the way, it is now referred to as work-life engagement. There is no magic formula, or percentage that makes our work lives and personal lives perfectly balanced. It changes daily, weekly and sometimes based on our age or stage in life.

We thrive and are at our best when we have a sense of engagement in both our professional and personal lives. And for me, having a balance of busy time and free time in both areas of my life makes me a happier person.

At work, I’ve started the practice of limiting my meetings. When I look at my daily outlook calendar, I make sure my meetings are not stacked. Having at least 30 minutes between meetings, and not having too many pre-scheduled meetings allows me thinking and breathing time. In fact, at my company I’ve encouraged my management team to un-invite themselves to all meetings which they don’t feel will be productive or could be handled by an email memo.

In my personal life, I’ve resurrected making my “things to do” list so things get done vs. lingering as “oh, I forgot to do that” items. I’ve also started to schedule fun things on the calendar in advance, so I am not just hanging out or vegging over the weekend. I’m adding exercise time to my daily “things to do list,” as I know that the endorphins I get from exercise lift my spirit and give me more energy.

Are you in denial about how you are feeling? Do you find yourself a little crabbier with your family or co-workers? Do you end some days saying to yourself “I don’t feel like I accomplished anything today” and feel like you have been in a fog?

Maybe it’s time to hit the reset button. Is it time for a day off, a short vacation, or some quiet time? Is it time to make a list of everything you want to do, whether that includes projects at home or work, or is it time to plan a vacation or call your best friend?

I hope you’re like me. Once you think about the issue, you can make a list, take time to think about it, and make a decision to do something different. All this actually reminds me of one of my favorite books: The 5 Second Rule by Mel Robbins. If you haven’t read it yet, I highly recommend it. And while you’re at it, check out her newest book, which was just published this week: The High 5 Habit.

You can do it!

Karen

I think all of us remember the horrific news on January 26, 2020—when famed NBA star Kobe Bryant’s helicopter went down with him, his daughter and seven other friends, all of whom perished.

But what I wasn’t aware of was what a great thought leader he had developed into.

As we age, we get smarter. We mature, we learn and we evolve. Kobe was 41 when he died, but many say he had the wisdom of someone much older.

Just this week, I was completing another audio book (# 70 so far this year) titled Make Your Next Shot Your Best Shot by famed sports psychologist Dr. Bob Rotella. This book is about the secret to playing great golf. I now have about 14 months of playing golf weekly under my belt, so when this book popped up on my suggested reading list, I thought the timing was perfect.

What I’ve learned from the book is that golf is a mental game. It’s a game of attitude (much more so than just a physical game). And as I was nearing the end of the book this morning on my drive to work, Rotella read through Kobe’s 10 rules:

I believe that Kobe’s 10 rules apply not just to basketball, or sports, but to every part of our lives.

Think about it!

Karen

How have you been feeling the last week or so? Maybe you felt lost, sick, confused, or angry (I actually felt a bit off on Sunday and couldn’t figure out why). Did you have to deal with lost or delayed shipments, broken appliances or did your internet crash? How about the fact that Facebook went down a few days ago, inexplicably?

After the Facebook crash, my immediate thought was, “Mercury is in retrograde.” In case you aren’t aware, several times a year, as you gaze up into the sky, the planet Mercury will look as if it is moving backwards. That is called “retrograde.” In my family, we actually mark the calendar when this is going to happen, as “fair warning.” We even have a family group text and compare notes when stuff starts to go wrong.

Last week, my partner Jack sent us this text:

“Mercury. I’m now a believer. When will it go away? I’m near losing it.

Printer. Failed.

Phone. Failed.

Computer. Failed.

Credit Card. Failed. WTF???”

Well, according to famed astrologer Gahl Sasson, not only was Mercury retro starting September 27, but a few other planets and such joined in: Pluto, Neptune, Uranus, Saturn, Jupiter, Chiron and Minerva are also retrograding right now. “This is heavy on our bodies, minds and souls. So take it easy, lots of misunderstandings and issues in relationships and anything in your life that serves as your mirror.” Thankfully, these periods only last about three weeks, and Mercury will move out of retrograde on October 17.

I even found an article on CNN Underscored (online) sharing advice on “Everything you need to keep calm this Mercury retrograde.” You can read the entire article here.

Since Mercury is the planet of communication, anything to do with communication or electronics is always a bit “off” during the retrograde. So, I guess it should not be a surprise that my new assistant Johnny lost his phone on a hike this past weekend (both electronics and communication)?

Please feel free to do your own research, but here is a partial list of what not to do during Mercury retrograde. Don’t:

Sign any contracts. If you are buying a home, double check every little detail in your contract.
Make a big purchase. Again, don’t be hasty and check through all details.
Take lightly traffic or travel situations. Watch for traffic and other travel mishaps (like our travel agent booking a return flight for one of my coworkers on the wrong date!).
Rely on technology. Don’t be surprised if your printers, computers or appliances have glitches, or Zoom fails mid-meeting.
Be surprised at lots of dropped calls.
Go looking for misunderstandings. During this time expect a lot of “that’s not what I meant…”

Thankfully, this is the third and final time for Mercury to go retrograde in 2021. We get a break from October 17 until the next retrograde period starting January 14–February 3, 2022. For more information on the goings on in 2022, check out this article.

I realize that some people do not believe in astrology or horoscopes and have no idea what sign they are (I am a Libra, thank you very much), and that all this is crazy talk. However, now that you are aware of Mercury, you may want to pay attention to what happens in your life during these mercury retrograde periods. It’s a little nuts!

Karen

Earlier this week I was invited to speak to a group of about 20 female attorneys from a leading global law firm. My topic: Resilience. (The other two speakers covered mentoring and negotiating.)

At first I was a bit perplexed as to why I was asked to speak on this topic, but after thinking about it, I realized that I actually am a bit of an expert of the subject. Here is why I say that: Just read my blog posts each week—I often talk about obstacles and challenges I have faced, and how I work my way through them. I think that is resilience.

When I started my remarks to the group, I started by saying, “You might think my success in life is due to me being lucky during my life.” I gave a little background on me and my company. You know the story—mom started our company 60 years ago. She introduced the kiwifruit to American consumers. I took over at age 30. I’m now living with the love of my life and am living happily ever after.

Then I spent the next 15 minutes recounting a few of the business happenings and personal challenges I have faced in my “lucky life.”

In 1993, while I was away on a business trip, we had an ammonia leak in our refrigerated warehouse and lost our entire inventory of produce (over $1 million). Fortunately, we were able to evacuate the building promptly so no one was injured, and our insurance policy covered our loss 100%. However, during the two days we were recovering and replacing our inventory, our competitor called one of our biggest clients and told them we went out of business! We lost that client’s business permanently. Lucky?

A few years later, one of our largest clients did a dramatic pivot in their purchasing patterns (without warning) and we lost about 35% of our business volume overnight. We lost millions of dollars over the next couple of years as I attempted to “right size” our business. Lucky?

And then in my personal life, I shared that I have been married and divorced three times. Lucky?

It was a difficult journey, but I finally concluded that it was better I not ever marry again and live the rest of my life as a single woman. Of course, about two-and-a-half years ago, I had our annual dinner with my longtime business friend (who was also single after his wife of 47 years passed away). Our annual “catch up” dinner ended with a (surprise) kiss and we have been together ever since, living our lives together, as if we are married (but we are not).

Those three stories are just a few of my experiences I chose to share. And I then divulged to the group how I got through it all:

“Focus on that which you have control over.”

Instead of having a pity-party for myself each and every time I had a monumentally difficult situation, I would review the following thoughts in my head:

Do I want to be liked or do I want to be respected?It took me a while to understand and accept that being respected was most important. I could not win a popularity contest and be a successful business owner.
How I do anything is how I do everything. My business coach pointed out some bad habits I had developed. Because I am willing to honestly be introspective, I realized that my bad habits in my business life were the same bad habits I had developed in my personal life. It took a lot of courage to admit this, but once I did, I found myself repeating this to both myself and to others as a reminder. How I do any ANYTHING is how I do EVERYTHING.
I ask myself in difficult situations: What is the worst that can happen? Literally, I go to the worst place in my head. For example, when my partner Jack was diagnosed with melanoma cancer 18 months ago, I went to the worst place. And the worst place was: Jack would die tomorrow. I would be alone. Where would I live? Of course, Jack is alive and well and thriving, but thinking about the “worst” place forced me to realize how ridiculous my fears were. And going to the extreme really can be a wake-up call that the reality will likely be significantly more positive.

So, as I finished up my presentation, I asked for questions or comments. One of the more senior leaders present said this, “We are so lucky to have Karen talk with us today. She is living proof that the smile you see on a successful business person’s face does not mean everything is perfect. It shows you that we all have challenges that we work through every day. And we get through them. Even if at the moment they seem daunting and impossible, we get through them.

Yes, Karen showed us how to focus on that which we have control over. She showed us the face of resilience.”

So, the next time you are facing a difficult situation, whether at work or at home, consider these thoughts:

Do I want to be liked or be respected?
How I do anything is how I do everything.
What is the worst that can happen?

Be resilient!

Karen

In my office, I noticed a giant stack of newspapers and magazines piling up on my assistant’s desk. Turns out, we receive more than 10 paper copies of each industry newspaper, plus at least two or three copies of each magazine.

So I grabbed a stack of the 10 duplicate newspapers and walked around the office asking, “Do you want a copy of this newspaper?” The vast majority of everyone said “no thanks”, as they get a daily electronic version via email. Since my co-workers are on their computers all day long, plus many of them work remotely from their home offices, they have gotten used to reading the headlines on their computer and only clicking through on the super interesting stories for more info. I did find a few people who were interested in the physical paper, but honestly, they were the other baby boomers in my office (we have a great mix of team members in their 20s, 30s, 40s, 50s and 60s).

So here I was with eight copies of the industry paper and thinking, “what a waste of natural resources.” What was even weirder about this situation was that I remember cancelling all our subscriptions to these physical copies when I realized times had changed and many people found it easier just to read on online. It seems as if the publisher of these industry papers continued to send them out, probably as a way to keep their circulation numbers high.

So, this mini-experiment made me think—how many other opportunities are there to make the choice: Paper or electronic?

Airplane tickets/Boarding passes — I love getting my boarding passes on my smartphone, via the airline app. No need to print the boarding pass ahead of time or stand in line when I get to the airport to print a ticket.

Reading books on a Kindle — Many people swear by the Kindle—only one small screen to carry instead of those large, heavy, paper books.

Music — Most of us use a device for our music—but back in the day, we had to purchase cassette tapes or CDs in order to listen to our favorite music. Now, thanks to our smartphones plus wireless speakers, we can get our music anytime, any place.

Coupons — Remember clipping coupons? Now, almost all coupons can be downloaded digitally and you have them handy on your smartphone and your smart wallet.

To-do lists — I admit, I still like to make paper lists for food shopping or my things to do, but many people use the “notes” app on their phone to make those lists, or they use the list function on Amazon or Out of Milk.

Movies — Don’t get me started on the revolution in this business. First you could only see movies by going to a physical movie theater. Then, do you remember purchasing movie DVDs? After that you could rent them at Blockbuster; then Netflix started mailing them to your home. Now, we have Apple TV, Hulu, Amazon+, etc. You can get any movie, any place. And with your smartphone or tablet, you can even watch them while on an airplane.

Magazines — Okay, I’m a little old fashioned here. We get subscriptions to at least 10 monthly magazines at our home. And, yes they do pile up sometimes … but they do get read. It’s kind of fun thumbing through the magazines, ripping out pages of stories I want to share or save. I am aware that every one of these magazines also has my email address and drops a teaser headliner email too frequently into my inbox. But I can hit that delete button pretty easily.

Thank-you notes — I still hand write thank you notes—to the tune of 290 handwritten notes so far this year. Yes, that’s more than one a day! Sure, I could send a text or an email … but in the last two weeks I’ve gotten three separate emails from recipients of my handwritten thank-you notes with essentially the same comment: “I know this seems ridiculous to send you a thank-you note for the thank-you note. But thank you! You really made me feel special. And I rarely, if ever, get a paper note anymore.”

I could go on and on with examples of how my world has shifted from being paper-based to electronic. Most of these changes are for the better, but some are a definite adjustment.

Since the pendulum has swung very far to the “electronic everything,” this means you can really stand out if you do something on paper. I predict printed company brochures, magazines, and personalized stationery are making a comeback.

So, stand out!

Karen

With all my running and walking activities of late (I completed my fourth half marathon on last Saturday), I am having a bit of discomfort with my feet and my knees. So, I thought it would be best to see a podiatrist.

It’s so amazing how the universe works—as within a day or two after I mentioned this out loud, a longtime friend of mine sent me an email and randomly mentioned she was having foot issues and found a great podiatrist near where I live!

So, I immediately called the doctor’s office to set up an appointment. When the receptionist answered, the first thing I said was, “Who’s this?” That always catches people by surprise, but I have found it is important to refer to someone by name. The office manager’s name is Jan, and I thanked her for all her help in setting up my appointment for the following week.

I have a practice of always setting up any number I call for service or a business in my contacts. That’s because I’ve learned over the years that I will usually have to call them back again, and this saves me from having Post-its all around my work area, or having to remember their name, or having to look them up via Google. I also add the “label” for what kind of service they are in their Outlook contact. For example, in this case I wrote the word “podiatrist” in the contact, so if I need to call the person back, I am not having to remember the doctor’s actual name—I can just do a search in contacts for “podiatrist.” It has saved me tons of time searching for my plumber, my electrician, and even the cable company.

After I had set up the appointment, within a few days my work schedule went crazy and I suddenly had a work conflict with the doctor’s appointment.

So when I called the office to change my appointment, I said, “Hi, is this Jan?” I could tell the office manager was quite startled that I knew her by name. That’s because in addition to saving the doctor’s information in my contacts, I added the name of the person who answered the phone. I do that all the time—I add people’s spouses names, kids’ gender and ages, secretary’s name, etc. I learned long ago that the most important word to any person is their own name and recalling something about them personally always creates an instant connection.

Jan easily gave me a new appointment time. I could tell she was especially nice on the phone, as I made her feel important by using her name.

Have you ever done something similar to this? Perhaps asked a server at a restaurant their name when you are seated and then thanked them by name during your meal? Did they seem a little bit more attentive to you?

So, I hope the next time you make a new connection, that you will immediately add their name, email, number, etc. to your phone/email contacts. Believe me, it may take a little bit of extra time up front, but you will thank me later when you need to reconnect with someone.

Best practice 101.

Karen

Yesterday I was on a business trip with a coworker. Because our offices are here in California and so much of the produce we sell grows here, it is easy to drive (or in our case, fly) to visit a few growers in a single day.

As we were driving back to the airport, I thanked my coworker for driving (it was about 250 miles round trip). He said, “No problem!”

I kind of gulped when he said that. Whenever I hear the words “no problem,” I am reminded of an important lesson I learned a few years ago.

A friend of mine pointed out that when we say the words “no problem,” we are actually projecting two negative words: “no” and “problem.” However, when we say “no problem,” it usually is because someone has thanked us for doing something, and instead of saying “you’re welcome,” we want to make it sound like it wasn’t a big deal, so we say “no problem.”

It reminds me of learning basic French. The word for thank you in French is “merci.” To respond to “merci,” you are taught to say the casual response of “de rien” (which literally translated means “for nothing”).

So, I offered an alternative answer to my coworker. I suggested that next time someone thanks him for something, how about saying “my pleasure.” He smiled at me and agreed to try it and see how it felt.

We pulled up to a gas station on our journey home and he got out to put gas in the car. I said, “Thanks for filling up the car with gas!” He paused, stuck his head back in the car, and said with a smile, “my pleasure.”

He agreed that it felt so much better.

And, it actually made ME feel better.

So, next time someone says “thank you,” resist the temptation to say “no problem.” Consider saying, “It was my pleasure!”

Karen

Do you have survey fatigue? You know what I mean—you make a large purchase (a car), buy something online (clothing) or call an airline or credit card company to dispute a charge, and within minutes you receive a survey via email. A few years ago those surveys were few and far between, they now seem to fill up our email in-boxes.

Many of my friends and family members tell me they don’t waste their time completing the surveys—partially because it takes time, and partially because they don’t think it makes a difference.

I’ve always been a firm believer that there is a human at the end of a survey and that if I have important or meaningful feedback to share, then I make the time to respond.

So that’s what happened to me a couple of weeks ago, after I attended a golf club fitting hosted by TaylorMade Golf at my local golf course. The club sent out the announcement, and I reserved the 30-minute time slot online. The timing was perfect for me, as there are two specific clubs that I was looking to purchase.

When I arrived at the golf club and walked up to the pop-up tent to test the clubs, I was greeted by two twentysomethings: a man and a woman. The woman was fairly personable, but all the guy did was look at his electronic tablet when I walked up and the first thing out of his mouth was, “I have another appointment at 11:00 a.m., so we need to hurry up.”

I looked at my watch and said, “Well, that means I still have 11 minutes to try out the clubs and make my choice!” The guy was annoyed (full disclosure—my partner Jack was there at 10:30 a.m. for his fitting and we shared the time slot, so I was within the time slot).

I tested a couple of styles of clubs, but obviously felt quite rushed and hastily made my decision to purchase. Afterward, I kept thinking that next time I would rather go to a golf store where I would not be so rushed, versus the convenience of a fitting at the golf course where I play.

Then came an email survey the next day. I was ready for it! I immediately completed it, explaining how it was not a great experience for me. What happened next was a huge surprise.

Within a few days, I received a personal email from another local TaylorMade representative who acknowledged my fitting experience and “wanted to make sure every fitting feels personal and you leave with a sense of satisfaction in your experience.” He offered to do a refitting at another local course.

Wow—I was impressed! I let him know that unfortunately my schedule would not allow me the time to have another fitting, but thanked him for reaching out. And then, the real kicker.

I received another email from him this morning. “Hey Karen—I am more than happy to drop off some golf balls and hats for the inconvenience. Please send me your address so I can deliver the swag. I also looked over your order, and it looks like the wedges you ordered are fairly backordered. I can switch them out for you for a similar shaft, and they will ship in September. Let me know if you would like me to make the change.”

Double wow! This customer experiential expert turned my awful incident and complaint into an experience that made me feel special and happy again! How did that happen so quickly?

First, he acknowledged my feedback in a timely fashion. He then let me know my personal satisfaction was important to him and the company and suggested some options to me.

He didn’t take “no” for an answer (as I really did give him a brush off with my first response). He gently responded with another option or two with kindness and authenticity and was not defensive, plus the offer of swag.

So, next time you have feedback to give, remember that there may be a human at the other end of the survey.

Or, if you are the company representative where a customer has had a less-than-stellar experience, responding quickly and authentically and offering some kind of replacement may make a difference. It’s important NOT to make excuses or defend your organization. Acknowledge the error flat out. That authentic humility goes a long way in this day and age.

So now, when you get a survey via email, perhaps you will take the time to give your feedback.

And of course, I cannot wait to get my new golf clubs. Crossing my fingers that I will be 100% satisfied. Or else, I’ll be contacting my new best friend Mike at TaylorMade.

Karen

Last week I took a couple of days of vacation and we went golfing about 20 miles away as a mini-vacation. I took up golfing almost exactly a year ago and have been playing about four times a month. The course we play at is pretty challenging, but like my partner Jack says—if you can play Bella Collina with its uneven lies, huge hills and rippling greens, you can play anywhere.

So, we decided to play at two of the Top 100 Golf Courses in the U.S.—Pelican Hill Golf Club (North and South Courses) in Newport Beach, Calif.

But this column is not really about golf, but rather about the amazing couple we played with on our second day. And how all four of our lives were changed forever.

It’s always a bit unnerving when you play golf as a twosome, as you never know who you will be matched up with. On most golf courses, you are matched up with another twosome, having no idea if your skill level is similar. Our first day, we were matched up with an older couple from San Diego. Neither were in good health, the man drank a couple of Bloody Mary’s instead of eating lunch, and their scoring was questionable. Needless to say, when we came to the course the second day, we were holding our breath as to who would be our golfing partners.

On that second day, we were matched up with another couple, Nick and Debbie. Nick approached us first, as we were sitting in our golf cart. He was fit, had a distinctive New Jersey accent and a big smile. Right away we hit it off with him. He looked at me and said his wife Debbie would be relieved to know that we were playing with another couple, as she always dreaded when she was the only woman in a foursome.

Then Debbie approached us. Again, she was fit, had that engaging Jersey accent, but was kind of reserved and quiet. She told me she has been playing golf for more than 10 years—so I warned her that I was just a beginner (wanting to set expectations in case I was not having a good golf day). Turns out Nick and Debbie had just completed a 3-day golf camp in the San Diego area and were apprehensive about how they would now play, after 3 days of a golf instructor “messing with their grip and stance”!

I noticed right away that Nick and my partner Jack hit it off. As we finished up each hole, the two of them would stay behind on the green chatting. In fact, their conversations got longer and longer as we moved through each hole, and it got to the point that I was a bit annoyed. So, I said something to Jack.

Then he told me what they were talking about. Debbie had just completed four months of chemotherapy for cancer treatment after several serious surgeries. Jack couldn’t remember what kind of cancer it was, but Nick was confiding in Jack about how he was feeling, how difficult it had been to tell their six children about her illness, and how much he loved his wife. This extended golfing vacation was to allow them to spend time together doing something they both loved—golfing together. Jack could relate—he lost his wife of 47 years, Bonnie, to pancreatic cancer about four years ago. Once Jack told me that, I said to myself, “You never know someone’s story.”

So as Nick and Jack were chatting during golf, I decided to make it easy for Debbie to open up to me. I shared with her about Jack’s diagnosis of melanoma and that he had just completed his second of eight infusions of Keytruda that week. As I told her about Jack’s fantastic and positive mental attitude, she started to talk to me. By the end of the round, we invited Nick and Debbie to come to our house for wine and dinner on Saturday before they flew home Monday morning.

We were so excited to have Nick and Debbie come to our house. We both realized that our being matched up on the golf course was kismet (fate). When they arrived, it was as if we were lifelong friends. We had an amazing evening of wine, conversation and upscale pizza. (Nick is Italian, so we took him to our favorite San Clemente Italian restaurant Brick Woodfire Cuisine for authentic, handmade pizza.)

As the evening progressed, Debbie and I had a chance to talk privately and she made a few comments about her honest worries about her surgery, her chemo and her health. I took the opportunity to share with her how Jack’s positive attitude and almost effervescent commentary about his own health and prognosis really fueled his energy, and I believe his recovery. I told Debbie that both Jack and I were big believers in being positive and how saying only positive words and having only positive thoughts really does make a difference. I could tell by her reaction that this made a difference for her.

As they were leaving our home, we all hugged each other and talked about when we would come to visit them in New Jersey during our next visit to the East Coast. Debbie whispered to me, thanking me for giving her such a positive message about her future.

The next morning we received a text from them: “Karen & Jack … it feels like we’ve known you for decades. Hard to believe it’s only been ~72 hours. Thanks again …”

Next time you notice someone not having a good day, remember: “You never know someone’s story.” Ask questions and show empathy.

When you are feeling sorry for yourself, or negative feelings are going through your head, remember: you are sending negative energy into the universe. Why not send positive energy and thoughts out there? They will work harder for you.

The next time you have the opportunity to make new friends or meet new people, just think, you might be making lifelong friends and having an opportunity to make a positive impact on their life!

Jack, me, Debbie and Nick

Karen

If I said the name Warren Buffett to you, I’m 100% positive that you would know that Buffett is the Chairman of Berkshire Hathaway and currently is in the Top 6 richest people in the world (current net worth of more than $100 billion).

But if I mentioned the name Charlie Munger, chances are you might not recognize his name. However, he is the Vice Chairman of Berkshire Hathaway, and Warren Buffett considers Munger his closest partner and right-hand man.

Both Warren and Charlie grew up in Omaha, Nebraska, and although they went their separate ways after leaving their hometown, they eventually reconnected and the rest, as they say, is legendary history.

Several years ago I was invited to the Berkshire Hathaway Annual Shareholders Meeting, which is held the first Saturday of May each year at the Omaha convention center. I am not a shareholder, but I am connected with an agricultural business colleague who holds a two-day roundtable the day before, and with the attendance comes admittance to the Annual Shareholders Meeting. It was an exhilarating experience both times I’ve attended.

Berkshire Hathaway owns many companies, including See’s Candies, Geico auto insurance, NetJets, Benjamin Moore & Co. paints, Duracell and Fruit of the Loom (for a complete list of subsidiaries, click Here). Unlike many investment firms, Berkshire Hathaway likes to invest and hold. (By the way, during the annual meeting, the basement of the Omaha convention center is like a mini-convention where all of the Berkshire Hathaway companies have booths set up selling their products. Many of them have annual meeting dates and images on their items. When I was there, I bought running shoes and socks with Charlie’s and Warren’s images on each pair!)

Because I have attended two of their annual meetings, when The Tao of Charlie Munger appeared on my Audible suggested book list, I downloaded it. At 1.6X speed, the book was a mere 2.5 hours. It has more than 130 great quotes from Charlie with commentary explaining his investment philosophy. And with my curiosity aroused after I finished it, I then decided to download a book about Warren Buffet, titled Warren Buffett’s Ground Rules. I figured if two ordinary guys from Omaha, Nebraska, could create one of the most long-term successful stocks—currently trading at $423,706 per share (the most expensive publicly traded stock)—there probably were a few things I could glean from reading about them.

Anything you want to know about Berkshire Hathaway and Buffett and Munger is easily accessible with a simple Google search. There are people in both camps—those who love and admire them, and those who criticize them. What I learned from their two books was the importance of integrity in business; I admired greatly Warren’s transparent communication to his shareholders in his annual letter to them (which he personally writes). That idea confirms what I have been doing for years—having open dialogue with all employees monthly or quarterly, updating them on how our company is doing.

I also learned that neither of these gentlemen lead flashy lives. Buffett still lives in Omaha, and when I was visiting my cousins who live there too, they were very nonchalant about how they regularly run into Buffett in the neighborhood. He does not live in a big mansion nor does he drive a fancy car.

Munger made Pasadena, California, his home and I had the great fortune of meeting him in person two years ago. As it turns out, we have mutual friends, and to make a long story short, I ended up spending July 4, 2019, on Charlie Munger’s boat!

Talk about humble and engaging, it was such a delight to meet Charlie two years ago. He was born on January 1, 1924, and maintains all his dry wit and humor and is now 97. When I met him (he was 95), I worked hard to think of something original to say when we were introduced. So, I decided to tell him that we had something in common. You see, during the Berkshire Hathaway annual meeting, Warren and Charlie sit at a long table up on a stage, in the Omaha convention center filled to the brim with 40,000 shareholders, taking unscripted questions from the audience for the better part of four hours. While they sit there answering questions, they sip on their Diet Coke (they own a chunk of the Coca-Cola Company) and Charlie munches on his favorite See’s candy: Peanut Brittle. And that’s my favorite See’s candy too!

Unlike other billionaires, neither seem self-absorbed and they both seem to shun publicity. They are just “regular guys.” Well, as regular as you can be with a net worth in the billions!

I admit, I learned a lot by reading about the “Oracle of Omaha” and his sidekick. My biggest business takeaway from reading about them was the importance of having a long view of business. With publicly traded companies, most CEOs are driven for short-term predictable performance, which they report in their quarterly earnings. They worry about the share price quarter to quarter. Buffett made it clear that he only invests in businesses he understands well (which, he explained, is why he skipped investing in dotcoms). He takes the highs and lows of his investing performance the same way all shareholders do. He does not take a large salary for himself. I wonder what would happen if more company CEOs took the long view.

Me and Charlie Munger

Me and Warren Buffett

Karen

Owls are such interesting animals. When I did a little research, I found out that owls represent wisdom, knowledge, change, transformation, intuitive development, and they are associated with trusting the mystery. They are tied to the spiritual symbolism of death, which brings about new beginnings with a higher understanding and evolved perspective. Owls can show up when you are being asked to listen to your intuition.

Funny thing is, my youngest daughter Sophia (whose name means “wisdom”) has always loved owls. When we went to Auckland, New Zealand, together three years ago, we found owl statues all over the city.

(My daughter Sophia posing with some of the owl statues we found in our visit to Auckland, NZ)

However, this is not the kind of owl I want to talk about. I want to talk about The Meeting Owl.

In the last 18 months, our staff has become used to meeting via Zoom, when we were all working from our home offices. Now many of us are in hybrid mode. During a group meeting, some of the team may be in the office, while others may be remote in separate locations. (Frankly, it has gotten a little weird to continue having meetings via Zoom when all but one person is in the office.)

Enter, “The Meeting Owl.”

I was introduced to the Meeting Owl by a professional speaker who experienced the technology firsthand when speaking to a small group. Some of the attendees were in a room together and others were remote. The Meeting Owl sits in the center of your meeting table and offers much better sound quality than a laptop, plus it offers the benefit of multiple camera images captured from around the room. The guest speaker said it was great to be able to see everyone individually while he was presenting!

So, picture this: I am holding a team meeting in my corporate office conference room and five of us are sitting around the table. Three of our team members are remote from their local home offices. We want to share a PowerPoint presentation or spreadsheets to have a discussion during our meeting. Before, we would all have had to be at our desk on Zoom – meaning we missed the dynamics of sitting around a conference room table together.

Now with the Owl, we see all the remote people on the screen, and each remote person sees individual images of those of us sitting around the conference room table. When we speak, the owl naturally zooms into the image of the speaker and projects it separately on the share screen. And the sound quality is fantastic!

So, if you are experiencing Zoom fatigue with your team meetings and have a hybrid work environment, check out the Owl. It’s a brilliant invention!

Karen

If you follow me at all on social media, then you know that my life partner, Jack Daly, has had a few health challenges lately. And those health challenges have allowed us to see firsthand, up close and personal, the effect of a doctor’s bedside manner.

While we were in Miami a few weeks ago, Jack started to have terrible, wrenching pain in his lower back. So bad that he could not lay down to sleep. So, at 4:00am in the morning, he woke me up and asked me to take him to the emergency room in Miami. Fortunately, Mercy Hospital was only a couple of miles away and when we arrived, there were only two or three other patients in the emergency room. I commented to the nurses that it seemed so quiet – all they did was smile and said it was quite a contrast to months before at the peak of COVID.

Dr. Salinas was the doctor on duty. After monitoring Jack, and assessing his pain, they ended up having to give him morphine. They did a CAT scan, to rule out a kidney stone. Just as we thought Jack was going to get discharged, Dr. Salinas walked back into the room and said, “I am concerned and saw something that doesn’t look right, and I want to run another test. If you were a member of my family, this is what I would do.” I was stunned. And then Jack commented, “That makes perfect sense to me since it is in alignment with what you have written on the wall!” Jack was referring to their mission statement which was posted on the wall of each patient room:

Our Patient Promise: We are committed to excellence always in every action, every patient, every time. We treat you like you are family.

It’s one thing to have a mission statement, but it’s another to embrace it. And Dr. Salinas’ personal care and concern that morning was amazing to watch. Admittedly, because it was a quiet morning in the E.R., we probably got a bit more attention, but it was refreshing to experience a doctor who was not rushed and demonstrated genuine care and concern.

(By the way, Jack’s back is fine. All three doctors he saw in the following weeks said he was probably exercising too much! Jack is a 15-time Ironman and is preparing to run Marathon #100 in Athens, Greece this December, so there is no stopping his training schedule).

Jack’s current health challenge is the recurrence of Melanoma (skin cancer). Last year he had a growth removed from the top of his head and has been all clear since then. But about 6 weeks ago he found a lump on his neck. So back to the cancer surgeon and lots of tests. The melanoma has NOT spread and was completely contained in his lymph node. So he was referred to an Oncologist who would be treating him with the miracle drug, Keytruda, for a year.

I decided to go with Jack to his first appointment with the Oncologist, as I had many questions. Of course, the waiting two weeks for the appointment was quite stressful for both of us.

As we waited in the patient room, a person with a white coat came in. She seemed quite shy, kept her eyes down, and never made eye contact with us. She did not introduce herself, but did mention she was there to do a pre-exam before the Oncologist came in. Frankly, her introverted manner did not give us a lot of confidence. That’s when I noticed that she wasn’t Dr. Valerin (the Oncologist we were there to see). Turns out she was a resident who was doing her residency under Dr. Valerin’s direction. The resident left the room as quickly and quietly as she entered.

A few minutes later Dr. Valerin came in. She greeted Jack, shook his hand, made eye contact, and smiled. She was positive, energetic and emphasized the positivity of the treatment plan. She let Jack know that she had collaborated with Jack’s surgeon just a few minutes earlier and explained in detail what the treatment plan was. Due to Jack’s busy travel schedule, I watched the two of them negotiate the frequency of his treatments. She was flexible (moving the infusion treatments from every 3 weeks, to every 6 weeks), but realistically detailed potential side effects.

And then she asked if we had any questions. Of course, I had about a dozen questions, which she patiently answered. Just before she was getting ready to leave the room, I had to comment.

I said, “Dr. Valerin, your approach was so different from the doctor that came in earlier. I’m so glad you are the one treating Jack.” She said, “Well, that was a resident and I would love your feedback as we train doctor’s here, and the only way we can make them world-class doctors is to give them feedback.” So, Jack and I shared our observations and she was most appreciative.

And that’s when I realized – we had witnessed the difference a doctors’ bedside manner can make. Dr. Salinas and Dr. Valerin both took a personal interest in their patient, made eye contact, and conversed with Jack so the assessment and treatment plan were well explained. I watched how Jack relaxed and had 100% confidence in his treatment plan, partially due to the way the doctor approached him.

Have you noticed this when you visit a doctor, go to the emergency room or have a procedure? When the doctor and nursing team take a personal interest in your well-being, and communicate openly and thoroughly, how you instantly feel better and your blood pressure goes down? Perhaps medical schools all over will start teaching classes on interpersonal communication and a link will be discovered linking kindness and care with faster recovery.

And that made me reflect on how I interact and how my team here at Frieda’s interacts with others. For example, one of our employees had a recurring payroll issue this week. As I watched the emails go back and forth, I decided to go talk with the employee in person. I looked her straight in the eye, apologized for the issues she was experiencing, and assured her it would be resolved. But I did ask her for her patience….and trust. She looked me back directly in the eye and said, “I trust you.”

And how about with customers and business associates? Do we sometimes avoid the big objections and concerns vs. acknowledging them directly? Are we so concerned with hearing ourselves talk, or defending our position, that we don’t really listen for the real pain point? I think if more of us paid attention to our own “bedside” manner, that we would have better working relationships, faster solutions, and less stress.

By the way, in case you are wondering, after Jack’s first infusion of Keytruda, we joked that it must be like kryptonite! It seems that Jack is back to his “superman” self and has started training for his upcoming three marathons. Dr. Valerin could not find the lump on his neck. We figure his positive attitude is already curing him.

Yes, a doctor’s bedside manner can make a difference!

Karen

Three years ago, I was attending a board meeting of the University of California Agricultural Issues Center. I have been a member of this board for more than 20 years and have enjoyed having input on the kind of published research that is done at the university on the challenges facing California agriculture. The meeting was at U.C. Davis, which meant I flew from Long Beach to Sacramento for the day to attend the meeting. As per usual, about 15 of us (a mix of businesspeople, university staff and researchers) sat around a large conference table reviewing research and brainstorming.

As we went around the table introducing ourselves, I noticed a young female student seated three chairs from me. When she introduced herself, I quickly logged on to LinkedIn to find out more about her background. Like many students, her name on LinkedIn (Alexandra) was not the name she used regularly (Allie), so during the break I took the opportunity to mention that she should update her LinkedIn profile so people could easily find her. That’s when I found out that Allie was graduating that year with a Bachelor of Science degree in Sustainable Agriculture and Food Systems. Her home was in Southern California and she did not yet have a post-graduation job or internship scheduled for the summer.

Allie was impressive as she presented to our group, so I immediately texted my sister Jackie that I thought I’d found the operations summer intern we were looking for! Of course Allie didn’t know any of this, but during our lunch break, I cozied up to her at the table and asked her if she would like to visit our offices when she went home after graduation.

To make a long story short, even though I was on vacation when she came to visit, Allie came for a tour of Frieda’s. My sister offered her an internship for the summer and Allie accepted. When the three-month internship was completed, we offered Allie a full-time position at Frieda’s as our Product Growth Coordinator in the Planning Department.

Fast forward from 2018 to 2021, Allie is now an Associate Produce Buyer for us, married to her college sweetheart last month, and they spent two weeks vacationing in Costa Rica. When she got back from her honeymoon and was back at work, the first thing she did was send me an email suggesting a book to add to my reading list. Apparently one of her friends gifted her the book “Brave, Not Perfect” by Reshma Saujani, founder of the organization, Girls Who Code.

Allie told me that she read the book during her trip and wanted to get my impressions.

I finished the book earlier this week, as always listening to it via Audible. It was especially meaningful as Reshma, the author, narrated the book herself. I came to work today and asked Allie about how she was introduced to the book and what her impressions of it were. We had a fantastic conversation about the challenges many young women face in their careers and personal lives — trying to be the “perfect” version of themselves. What I got from the book was great advice about why it’s OK to be brave, OK to fail, OK to mope around after failure, plus the importance of picking yourself up and moving forward. None of us is perfect and there is no need to be perfect. It’s all a journey, our own personal journey.

So, thank you, Allie, for being brave enough to give me a book recommendation. Thank you for being open to doing an internship at Frieda’s in operations after receiving the Most Outstanding Senior Award when you graduated. I’m sure there were many companies standing in line to offer you a job.

We are all so proud of Allie, as this past year, she participated in an industry apprenticeship program (sponsored by the local Fresh Produce & Floral Council), doing the entire 12-month program virtually due to the pandemic. It was not a surprise that Allie was selected by the other 11 members of her apprenticeship cohort to be the graduation speaker, making all of us proud during their virtual graduation.

Allie with FPFC Award in Recognition of her successful completion of the 2020 Apprentice Program

Allie and her husband Danny in Costa Rica, Playa de Guinoes

And many thanks to her U.C. Davis college mentor, Dr. Dan Sumner (a world-renowned agricultural economist), who whispered to me at that 2018 board meeting: “She is the best student project manager I’ve ever had! You should snap her up!”

Have a great 4^th of July holiday weekend — celebrating our freedom and independence!

Karen

Sometimes we have news . . . bad news . . . that we want to keep a secret. You know what I mean—we don’t want to share bad or sad news with others because it would make us feel like a burden to them.

Has that ever happened to you? Maybe you lost your job, maybe you ended a relationship, or had a health issue and you kept it to yourself.

I know this has happened to me multiple times in my life. Something bad is going on in my personal life and I feel like it would be a burden to share, or maybe I think it’s not important to others, so I don’t tell anyone. Worse yet, I worry that I would give the impression of being a failure, or fear that people will judge me for not being perfect, so I keep things to myself.

Someone told me many years ago: When you keep bad news to yourself, it weighs heavily on YOU and only you … it causes internal stress, anxiety, sleeplessness, etc. But, if you speak it out loud by telling others, then you have “shared” the bad news, so it is not resting only on your shoulders.

That has been a conversation I have had with myself many times in my life. I had something on my mind, or a situation came up, and I felt the best strategy was to keep it to myself. I figured I could solve it by myself, if I thought about it long enough. But oftentimes it would turn into a downward spiral of worry and anxiety. And remember, I didn’t want to be a burden.

Soon I would reflect back on the above advice I received … and I would eventually decide to talk about it with someone else. For me, there are a few people I can turn to—first and foremost is my family. As you know, my sister Jackie and I are business partners, and we see each other every day at work. So she is the most accessible person to me. We are quite different in personality and work styles, so I have found her perspective to be balanced, positive and supportive. Never judgmental. Of course, when my mother Frieda was alive, I would often turn to her. Being able to tell your mother things always seems to be comforting. Additionally, I am lucky that my two daughters and I are so close, and even though I am technically their parent, now that they are adults, they are two of my closest friends and confidants. And then there is my partner, Jack, and my close posse of girlfriends.

What about you?

Are you keeping something a secret? Are you hoping the issue will “go away” if you ignore it? Are you afraid to share the news with friends or family because you don’t want to be a burden, or because you don’t think it’s important to others?

It’s okay to admit that you’re holding back. But consider this: by telling a friend, a family member, or even a therapist your problem, you are allowing others to help and support you, and you have the opportunity for a different perspective or solution to the issue.

It’s hard to get help without asking for it. Oftentimes it takes a little extra vulnerability. But our friends and family cannot help us unless we are willing to share our thoughts and our deepest fears.

Personally, I can say that this is one of life’s most important lessons. Allow others to support you.

Karen

Do you remember when you were first learning to print or write as a youngster and your parents made you handwrite thank-you notes? I sure do. Especially after my bat mitzvah (at age 13), I recall having to handwrite dozens of thank-you notes, mostly to my parents’ friends, who had generously gifted something to me. Then when there was a wedding shower, and baby showers, there seemed like hundreds of thank-you notes to write.

Especially when I was in my teens, it felt as if it was a burden to write the notes, and I recall going through the motions of writing the same message: “Dear Person, Thank you for the lovely gift you gave me. I will use it.”

When my two daughters were growing up, I taught them that showing sincere gratitude by writing thank-you notes in a timely fashion was proper etiquette. They humored me by writing them, and oftentimes I sat with them while they wrote the notes, as a means of showing support for the tedious task.

Fast forward to now. I am the gift giver. Seems like all my family’s and friends’ kids are having lifecycle events—showers, weddings and babies. It’s easy to know what to give as a gift, as there are now multiple websites to facilitate registering for what you want.

In a time when sending a gift is a “click” away, it is rare that you go in person to make a purchase, wrap the gift yourself, and hand-deliver it to the recipient and get to see the look on their face when they open the gift. So, I have found that those handwritten thank-you notes have more meaning to me.

In fact, I admit I get a little edgy when I don’t receive a thank-you note in a timely manner. During the last year, I have noticed that a few of the people I have sent gifts to either took an extraordinary amount of time to send a thank-you note, or didn’t send one at all. When I noticed myself getting uptight about not getting a note, I really had to ask myself—was receiving acknowledgement really that important? I realized that since I could not give the gift in person, I actually wondered if they got it. Once I knew it was received, then I found myself wondering about the person’s manners.

Were they taught, like my kids were, that writing thank-you notes was expected? Did they ever think of what it was like from the perspective of the gift giver to wonder if their gift was received and/or appreciated?

That’s when I decided just to let those feelings go. I desire to be that person that gives a gift because it makes ME feel good, and because I want to “make someone’s day” with a special, useful or wanted gift. I am not giving a gift with the expectation of getting a thank-you note.

That has made it much more fun for me to gift to people.

On the flip side, I have decided that one of the “gifts” I can give, is to write notes to family and friends. Many times these notes or cards are unexpected. They are not for any reason, other than to show my personal gratitude to someone. That act of putting in writing my feelings about someone—and then mailing it—has actually started to give me joy! (One of my favorite occasions to do this is for Mother’s Day, when I send cards to many of my family and friends who are moms.)

Have you ever thought about the effect you have on someone when you write them a personal note, sometimes for no reason at all? It actually can make someone’s day.

And in case you’re wondering what inspired this blogpost … although I was not invited to the very small wedding of one of my friend’s daughters, I decided to send a wedding gift. The gift (some of their dishes and glassware) was on backorder, so they received a constant stream of packages from me over a two-week period. Each time an item shipped, I received notification, so I knew they were receiving it. But I never received a written thank-you note.

That was until this past weekend. I was at a birthday celebration for my friend and her daughter came up to me right away. She gave me a huge hug and thanked me profusely for the stream of dishes and glasses I had sent, and she admitted that her thank-you note was way overdue. But it had been mailed just the day before. When the thank-you note arrived on Monday, it made me chuckle and smile. Her note said, “It seems I have perfected the art of procrastination … in writing this thank-you note!”

Is there a thank-you note you have been meaning to write? Make someone’s day and write it now!

Karen

This week I decided it was time to check out the new Amazon Fresh store that had opened near our offices in Southern California. For some of us, the fact that Amazon has opened about a dozen free-standing retail grocery stores in the U.S. is perplexing. First they bought Whole Foods. We all figured that was their retail expansion strategy. Then they closed the Whole Foods small store format “365” stores, but now Amazon Fresh stores are popping up. The resemblance is clear.

After my visit, I decided that Amazon’s move made a little more sense. It boils down to logistics. I visited my store at 12:30 p.m.—the normal lunch hour in our area. There were almost no customers in the store, but there were dozens of Amazon Fresh employees pushing baskets around the store pulling orders for Amazon online shoppers who have placed orders. Some customers pick up their orders on site, as there were dozens of numbered parking spots outside the store. Others will have them delivered to their home.

It feels like Amazon Fresh 2.0. By having their own retail stores (instead of developing a network of large warehouses/distribution centers), they are using the retail outlets as their “warehouses,” which can do double duty as a grocery store if a shopper so desires. It’s a much smaller investment to build these.

Like other retailers who are “testing the waters” with their unique format (Fresh and Easy, Lidl, Aldi, Haggen, etc.) they have some bugs to work out on the product mix. Buying and selling perishable items like produce is definitely an art. If you over-order, you will throw product away causing financial losses. If you under-order, you disappoint your customers when you cut their orders and the lifetime value of that shopper may decline.

But there is something very positive about Amazon Fresh opening stores, and that is that they are reducing their carbon footprint when it comes to corrugated packaging material. You know what I mean—you order something on Amazon, or maybe you order five things on Amazon, and they all come in separate boxes. And some of those boxes are tremendously oversized. What you may not realize is that the incredible appetite Amazon has created for “ordering online” has created a paper and packaging shortage like we’ve never seen in our lifetimes.

Companies who manufacture corrugated boxes are working overtime. They cannot keep up with demand. The number of forests being cut down is skyrocketing, and I suspect the impact on the environment is NOT a net positive. True, we may not drive ourselves to the grocery store as often, using less fossil fuel. But, I don’t think we can recycle as much cardboard as we are all using when we order on Amazon. How do I know it is out of control? Well, I cannot dispose of all my “recycling” each week on trash day due to the overfilled bin.

So, that’s why I think it is better, as a consumer, to shop locally. It may take a full hour to make a list, drive to the store, do your grocery shopping, drive home and put everything away, but I feel better about spending an hour doing my own shopping, smelling the produce and enjoying the bright and vibrant colors as I hand-select my own food, vs. gaze outside my front door to stacks and stacks of cardboard boxes.

If you’re a parent of a toddler and think it’s a hassle to go grocery shopping with them, how about turning the shopping trip into a teachable moment? Let your kid’s help you pick out your food. Teach them what to look for when picking a banana or berries. What a great opportunity to prepare young ones for life on their own! Plus, it gives you quality time with them while you shop.

I may be old-school by doing my grocery shopping in person. I know my 31-year-old daughter Alex says she doesn’t remember the last time she went into a grocery store to shop. She orders everything online. And you probably know people just like her.

So, next time you are trying to figure out if you should go to the store or order online, think about that overfilled recycling bin at your house. There is a price for all of us to pay—for our planet to pay—when we produce waste.

I know for me, I will be figuring out ways to make my shopping experiences enjoyable, vs drudgery.

I would love to know what you think! Please share your thoughts with me.

Karen

I never thought I would be spending both my Saturday and Sunday afternoons watching the PGA Championship, but last weekend after my other social events we watched the end of the tournament. In case you aren’t a golf fanatic—it was a total upset!

(If golf isn’t really of interest to you, please keep reading, because this blog is not about golf. It’s about aging (which we are all doing), winning (which we all want to do in some fashion) and being open-minded to new approaches.)

So, here’s the background:

Phil Michelson, age 50, won the PGA Championship last weekend. Golf championships are usually four-day events, and this particular tournament was played on the Ocean Course at Kiawah Island, SC. I’ve been to Kiawah and the only thing I remember is alligators. They are everywhere. And as I was watching TV on Saturday, play had to stop while a young alligator sauntered across one of the greens! Besides alligators, it is known for being one of the most difficult golf courses in the U.S.

Add in the fact that 50-year-old golfers rarely—if ever—win golf tournaments (it’s usually the twenty-somethings and thirty-somethings that are winning). Younger golfers typically are in better shape, have more stamina, and are better scoring golfers.

And while I don’t personally think 50 is old, there is NO WAY that 50-year-old Phil Michelson was predicted to win. But, by the end of day 3 (Saturday), he was ahead by a few strokes.

How did he win?

Let me share with you what Phil looks like now (on the left) and what he used to look like a few years ago (on the right). The change is remarkable.

(Image Left) Phil on Sunday May 23, 2021 (Image Right) Phil pictured a few years

For most of his career, Phil was pudgy. Plus, he was diagnosed with psoriatic arthritis in 2010, which was a devastating blow to his career. I remember hearing about his diagnosis and thinking, “Well, that’s a painful disease and probably a career-limiting event.”

Fast forward to Sunday, May 23, 2021, when he rocked the golf world. Just google “Phil Michelson Diet” and you’ll find out one of the secrets to his win. In fact, his win was so remarkable, that you can read about it in multiple places; golf.com, foxnews.com or forbes.com to name a few.

The secret to his success?

Deep daily meditation (to help quiet the distracting noise when he is golfing)
Intermittent fasting (he fasts every week for 36 hours and occasionally has done a 6 day fast (drinking only a special coffee blend plus water) to “give his body a rest and the ability to reset”
Being mindful about what he eats and drinks (no more diet sodas) and eating less

And of course, as with any professional athlete, he has multiple coaches and practices daily.

But more than anything, Phil showed me—and the rest of the world—that you could turn back the hands of time by being willing to change your habits. You could conquer a devastating auto-immune condition by changing your diet. You could actually give up ALL food for short periods of time to allow your system to rest. My anecdotal research has shown that intermittent fasting can help with many conditions (pre-diabetes, weight loss and more). And of course, as an elite athlete, the discipline of practicing, utilizing coaches to improve your performance and—more than anything—having a winning mental mindset can change your destiny.

So maybe you’re not a golfer. But you probably have a few extra pounds and some aches and pains. And there is probably some part of your life in which you want to improve your performance.

Maybe it’s time to hit the reset button. Maybe it’s time to get a coach. Maybe it’s time to evaluate your diet. Perhaps it’s time to find a way to improve your concentration and focus.

Who knows? Maybe Phil’s special coffee mixture will work for you:

Phil Mickelson’s “special coffee blend” ingredients

350-450 grams of coffee (Ethiopian beans)
2-3 tbsp. MCT or XCT oil
Large scoop flavorless collagen protein powder
Dash of Himalayan pink sea salt
Small glass of almond milk
200 mg. L-Theanine
1 tbsp. Manuka honey
1 tsp cinnamon

No surprise that Phil has already launched this coffee as a product line, Coffee For Wellness!

So, whether you decide to try meditation, hire a coach to help your performance or start intermittent fasting, I hope you know that age doesn’t matter! At any age, we can have a winning attitude!

Enjoy and stay healthy!

Karen

Let me start by saying that I do not consider myself an “outdoorsy” person. I’ve never been camping and have no desire to do so. A weeklong visit to New York City, with visits to museums, plays, restaurants is my cup of tea.

But with all the travel restrictions due to COVID, we were hard pressed to figure out a vacation destination that would give us a break from the rat race of work, working from home, etc.

Solution: Fly to Las Vegas, rent a car and spend seven solid days driving and visiting national parks in Utah.

Now this may sound like a normal occurrence for many people, but I didn’t even know that there were five national parks in Utah, nor would I have recognized their names.

But that is how we spent the last week.

We stayed in folksy, rustic hotels. Signs like this did stir a bit of nervousness in me … but I survived.

We wore our exercise clothes and running shoes every day and ended each day covered in red dust and sweat.

We biked and hiked through Zion National Park. We spent hours hiking our way up Scout’s Lookout Trail with dozens of switchbacks along two mountains.

In Bryce Canyon National Park, we hiked down the Queen’s Garden Trail where we got to see the hoodoos up close.

As we were hiking back up, we witnessed a medical emergency being handled when a large, male hiker had a hypoglycemic episode. We all applauded when the EMTs had him strapped in and were able to transport him back up to the waiting ambulance.

In Capitol Reef National Park, we hiked for miles deep into a canyon to explore Zebra Slot Canyon.

By the way, it was the only national park that you could enter for free and there were nearly zero other people.

In Canyonlands National Park, we explored the Mesa Arch. It reminded me of a scaled down Grand Canyon, so taking a few minutes to sit on the edge of a cliff and take it all in, was a perfect pause moment.

In Arches National Park, we were amazed by the beauty of all the arches and rows of “fins.” It, by far, was the most beautiful national park we visited. It was so fantastic that we went back a second day late in afternoon (when most people were gone) and went exploring and arch hunting! Thank goodness for the cairns (small stacks of big flat rocks that the park rangers put out to mark the path, which can be hard to follow on just sandstone rock/cliffs). Sometimes it felt like we were on an Amazing Race hunt … we had no idea where we were headed, we just kept our eyes out for cairns to guide us.

Being the city girl that I am, my biggest worry was: because of the heat, we had to drink a lot of water. A LOT of water. Well, what goes in, must come out. Coincidentally, my dear friend, Eileen Benjamin, entrepreneur and owner of SKORZIE.com (a website for discounted ladies golf and tennis attire), gifted me a P-style device, to assist me in the wild. Ladies, if you take long walks, hikes or play golf…….this is a life saver!

P-styles come in all colors!

This was the first vacation I have been on where I did not get bored. Every day was a new field trip into the wild….and I found myself jonesing for a new trail or canyon to explore.

If you’re looking for a vacation destination this summer or fall, when it is cooler, and want a change of pace – a national park is a destination that I highly recommend.

Karen

In past blogs, I have mentioned how my favorite books are biographies. I love people and peoples’ stories, so discovering the details and background on the lives of interesting people is a constant source of fascination and learning for me.

But, I am not an avid sports fan and I don’t follow any teams. And Boxing is the one sport that I am least interested in. The thought of people punching each other (many times in the head) with the objective of knocking them out, seems barbaric and ludicrous to me.

So, with this background, it may surprise you to learn that the latest book I read entitled “Sound and Fury” by Dave Kindred is the story of three-time world championship heavyweight boxer Mohammad Ali (aka Cassius Marcellus Clay, Jr.) and newscaster Howard Cosell. Author Dave Kindred knew both Ali and Cosell, so he wrote the book as a compare-and-contrast study of the athlete and the sportscaster, alternating chapters in the book about each person. The two men interacted many times during Ali’s career and formed a special relationship of uncanny understanding.

Muhammad Ali and Howard Cosell in 1992. Photo Credit…Marty Lederhandler/Associated Press

I listen to most books on Audible, and the narrator Dick Hill really enhanced this book, as he had an entertaining way of changing his voice to resemble Mohammad Ali’s deep, almost whisper-style, to the fast-talking, blustery, New York-accented Cosell.

If the name Howard Cosell doesn’t sound familiar (he passed away in 1995 at age 77), he is the guy who conceived of Monday Night Football! In his bright yellow jacket, he turned sports broadcasting into its own genre. An attorney by education, he switched to sports broadcasting as a career after he was asked to host a radio show on Little League in 1953. After a decade in radio, he moved to television. His most famous catchphrase was “I’m just telling it like it is!”

Mohammad Ali (born Cassius Marcellus Clay, Jr.) was quite a contrast to Cosell. In the book, you realize that Clay was born to be a boxer, as he started throwing punches and using his fancy footwork when he first started walking. He represented the USA at the Olympics, and at age 18 he was awarded the gold medal in light heavyweight boxing at the 1960 Summer Olympics. He then turned professional and changed his name to Mohammad Ali in 1964 (he became Muslim in 1961).

Surprisingly, he was an activist, being one of the few people who came out publicly against the war in Vietnam. At the time he was considered un-American, and was stripped of his boxing titles and his passport was taken away. In hindsight, it seems incredible that he stayed true to his beliefs and persisted. In one chapter of the book, when his case went all the way to the Supreme Court of the United States, you learn the backstory of how the vote of the justices went from a 4-4 tie, to a 0-8 in favor of Ali! It’s such an amazing story.

“Float like a butterfly—sting like a bee” was his mantra. At the time, most fighters let their managers do the talking, but Ali was considered provocative and outlandish and spoke on his own behalf. He was known for “trash-talking” and often did freestyling rhyme schemes and spoken word poetry. On his Wikipedia page, there is reference to two Grammy nominations he received as a spoken-word artist (aka rapper).

Ali was diagnosed with Parkinson’s in the 1980s (which some attribute to boxing-related injuries) but remained active as a public figure globally until his death in 2016 at age 74.

Here is my small world story. In the 1980s, I was flying from Chicago to Los Angeles. As I was sitting in flight, I kept hearing an odd noise. It sounded like a bee was buzzing near my head. When I turned around in my seat, I saw this husky black man, sitting directly behind me, rubbing his fingers together. I smiled at him. I think he may have said, “Float like a butterfly, sting like a bee.” When we exited the plane, Mohammad Ali and his wife were rushed off to a waiting car, like all dignitaries are. It was a moment I will never forget.

I never realized how both men, with such different backgrounds, had a hand in changing the world of sports. Howard Cosell added an intellectual perspective to an otherwise blow-by-blow, rather mundane broadcast genre. And Mohammad Ali truly believed in world peace, in contrast to his chosen field of brutalist boxing.

Sound and Fury is an incredible story and definitely worth a read or listen.

Karen

Have you ever heard good news from a doctor that just made you take a deep breath and breathe a sigh of relief? Well that’s what happened to me last week. Before I tell you what the news was, I’d like to share the back story.

A few years ago, I decided it would be a good idea to get a stress test. You know the kind where the doctor (a cardiologist) puts you on a treadmill or a bicycle to test the health and functionality of your heart. I figured that since running a company was a stressful job (and I had always heard that public company executives had annual physicals), it would be a good idea for me to get a stress test to see how I was doing health-wise.

My regular doctor referred me to a cardiologist in my local community. When I went to his office for my first EKG and stress test, I realized quickly that he did not have a warm and friendly bedside manner. Ironically, being in his office seemed stressful to me. During my first visit, he proclaimed “you have high blood pressure!” I knew that I did not have high blood pressure, but it turns out I have “white coat syndrome” which means when I go to the doctor (and see someone in a white coat), my blood pressure goes up.

So, my first assignment from my doctor was to go home, go to Costco, buy a blood pressure cuff and test my blood pressure twice a day–morning and night. I was told to keep a log of the readings and return to his office in a month. Of course, my blood pressure turned out to be in the normal range, so he said I could come back in 12 months for another EKG and stress test.

The following year, he noticed that my cholesterol had edged up to over 200 (having a total cholesterol count less than 200 is most desirable and considered in the healthy range). I told him I had no interest in taking medication to lower my cholesterol (like many physicians that was his first suggestion). I asked him to tell me what actions I could take that did not involve prescription medication to lower my cholesterol.

He told me to exercise every single day. Eight days a week. He said I needed to do cardio exercise between 30 and 75 minutes each day, and keep my heart rate between 120-140 (based on my age). Then he told me to lower my animal protein intake and eat a plant-based diet to help me drop some excess weight. That wasn’t hard for me, as I have eaten a mostly plant-based diet for many years and regularly snack on Jicama, Watermelon Radish and Shishito Peppers which are all excellent sources of vitamin C and fiber. He told me to come back in six months.

It felt as if it was punishment to have to come back in six months, as it meant I would have to log my blood pressure for the two weeks before my visit so I could prove to the doctor that my blood pressure was in the normal range, just in case my “white coat syndrome” kicked in. And honestly, going to the doctor for a stress test was stressful!

The next time I went back, I reported that I had been diligently doing my daily exercise, but honestly, I never really pushed myself. I sweated a little bit, but I never totally hit my maximum potential. I hadn’t really lost any weight, and he once again suggested a solution would be to take medicine to lower my cholesterol. I told him I was really committed to lowering my cholesterol and improving my health. I asked him for any other suggestions. This time, he suggested I start doing intermittent fasting and reducing my total daily calorie intake.

Intermittent fasting. I had no idea how I was going to NOT eat when I got up in the morning and to hold off consuming any food until noon each day. But that’s what he told me to do, and he said scientific studies show this was incredibly effective.

I’ll never forget my kids’ reactions when I told them I was going to start intermittent fasting each day, only drinking water and black coffee until noon. “Good luck with that” was their exact comment.

What I learned is that the key to intermittent fasting is all mental. Instead of focusing on “no food,” I prepared myself by thinking about eating at 12 noon. I drank tons of water and made sure I kept myself very busy in the morning. Meetings and phone calls were my friends. It wasn’t hard to skip making breakfast in the morning, as that gave me an extra 20 minutes, and once I arrived at work, I kept myself so busy that the time flew by. I also found I wasn’t as hungry as I had been previously and I cut back on the amount of food I ate. Previously when I had embraced a plant-based (vegan) eating plan, I always felt hungry. This time I felt light and energetic.

And I really amped up my exercise regime. If you’ve been reading my blog for the last year, you know that my partner Jack is an exercise maniac. At age 72, he still runs 4-8 miles a day, rides the Peloton and the Concept 2 Rower at least once a day, does marathons, Ironman’s, etc. With him as my exercise partner, and quasi-fitness coach, I have been able to complete three half marathons in the last year, rode the Peloton and used the rower almost daily, in addition to resuming swimming laps as a form of regular exercise. I’m not totally plant-based with my meals, as I enjoy fish a few times a week (I’ve found I really do need that protein).

During the last year, since my last visit to the cardiologist, my body changed. I hadn’t really noticed anything until friends started commenting that I looked a lot thinner and more fit. Then I started to notice how my clothes were fitting differently, and when I looked at photos of myself during the last few months, I was surprised to see a thinner, more fit self.

So, back to the doctor I went last week. When I handed him my two-week log of my blood pressure when I walked in the office, I commented to him, “some days my blood pressure was really low … like 96/66 … I am kind of concerned. Plus my resting heart rate has gone from the low 70s to 58-60 bpm.” Dr. Rizi commented, “The lower, the better on your blood pressure! Don’t be worried about that.”

He gave me the EKG and stress test. When he walked in to give me the results, for the very first time he had a big smile on his face. He was pleased I had dropped about 12 pounds in the last year, my waist size was a lot smaller and that my EKG and stress test were amazing! His exact words were, “Everything is working perfectly! You couldn’t have better results.”

He then told me to come back in a year. I asked him, why do I need to come to see you every year? Several doctors I had spoken with questioned why I was continuing to get a stress test every year since my results had been normal. Dr. Rizi told me there are two philosophies. First, you can wait until you have a cardiac issue and then try to treat it. Or you can prophylactically get tested each year to monitor your heart health. I also think it’s a way to keep yourself honest—driving your mindset to success, since you are going to get tested each year.

When I left his office last week, I breathed a deep sigh of relief and satisfaction. I knew that the reason my results were so improved was that I had worked hard to exercise at least one hour every day (I track it daily). I pushed myself to sweat, made it a goal to do at least two forms of exercise a day (rower + Peloton, or rower + walk/run or, swim + rower, etc.). I also weigh myself every morning as a way to keep myself honest. When I’ve overindulged at dinner or had wine, I see it on the scale the next day, which forces me to be more diligent the following day.

As I reflect back on the last few years of seeing the cardiologist, I realize that optimal health is truly a combination of what you eat and how much you exercise. You cannot exercise yourself out of a poor diet. It’s a combination of food AND diet. And sleep of course. I’ve also managed my schedule to get an average of 8+ hours of sleep a night.

It’s a great feeling to have a good handle on my health and to know how to maintain it. How about you? Are you procrastinating going to the doctor to find out if you really are overweight? Or do you know your cholesterol or blood pressure are too high? Do you dread the thought of a doctor telling you what you already know deep inside? Get ahead of the game now. Start walking daily, even for 30 minutes at a time.

Take baby steps and try intermittent fasting—don’t eat until 10:00 a.m., then you can work up to not eating until noon. Cut back on your total calories consumed.

Believe me, the ability to take that deep breath, that sigh of relief, to know that you are in outstanding health is worth it!

Karen

There is a lot of talk about how the pandemic has changed consumer retail purchasing patterns. Consumers are far more likely to purchase groceries online (for either delivery or pick up) than they were pre-COVID. My dear friends Mary and Russ have not been in a grocery store in more than 13 months. Mary goes to the Ralphs website, orders her regular food staples including almond milk, coconut water and Stokes Purple® sweet potatoes and she drives to her local market parking lot to pick up her bagged groceries. She doesn’t even get out of her car—she pops open her trunk and a porter puts them in for her.

Some retail grocers were prepared for this online shopping phenomenon, but most had to amp up their website, get updated images of their most popular product offerings, and some even outsourced this (pick-up and delivery) service to Instacart and other online shopping delivery services to quickly respond to the onslaught of consumer demand.

Now that many are vaccinated, some of my friends are venturing out to once again make purchases in person.

Last week I discovered how the car-buying business has evolved and about how shopping in a Nordstrom department store has changed. Some would say these changes stemmed from the desire for contactless shopping; others would say the process happened to remove roadblocks that consumers always hated.

Changes when purchasing a car: A friend told me that she went to purchase a vehicle and when she went to the finance “office” to do the financial paperwork, she was blown away that there was NO paper.

Not only was the entire transaction done via a screen, but the screen was actually the desk of the finance manager. You can see in these photos that the finance guy could not only have her sign each form with a stylus, but he could also write out personal messages and notes for her to see. Of course, the stylus was sanitized before given to her to sign, and she was able to pick and choose what extended warranties she wanted, then—in one click—her revised payment amount was updated. The dealer emailed the entire contract to her, making it far easier to send to her insurance company and to keep as a record—no more super long bill-of-sale forms that have to be stored in a file.

Changes in department store shopping: I took my daughter Sophia shopping for her 27^th birthday last week. We had not been into a Nordstrom department store together in more than a year. As we were finishing up, I left her with my credit card to complete the sales transaction and I headed downstairs to buy some lipstick for myself.

Once I had selected what I wanted, I confessed to the sales associate that my Nordstrom credit card was upstairs with my daughter. She said, “That’s not an issue—here are quick and easy instructions to get a temporary QR code to use to charge on your account.”

Because my mobile number is associated with my account, I texted the message “Hi Nordstrom” to a number, they asked me via text for my zip code and date of birth and then I requested they “get my card” and I instantaneously got a QR code that I could use for purchases during the next 24 hours. It literally took less than 30 seconds. I was able to make my purchase without having my credit card in my possession.

QR Code Text Message

If I were to identify one of the silver linings of the pandemic, it would be that businesses were forced quickly to embrace technology in ways they never imagined.

For example, I have my main credit card loaded on my iPhone wallet app, so I don’t have to carry a credit card and purse into the grocery store when I shop. I simply hold my phone next to the credit card reader and double click my iPhone and the purchase is automatically charged. Three of the four stores I frequent when shopping for food have updated technology to enable the use of this “wallet app.” You can imagine that the ease of purchase (and removal of obstacles) has helped me modify where I shop. These three stores make it more convenient when I shop.

My mom always said, “Technology is just amazing these days.” I have to agree. Necessity is the mother of invention, and due to COVID lockdowns, many companies and organizations were forced to embrace technological change quickly.

Kudos to the automobile dealers, retail markets and department stores who have embraced technology.

What changes have you seen in your adventures that have happened in the last 12 months?

Karen

This past weekend a good friend came over for lunch at my house. Now that we are both vaccinated, it was nice to finally be able to hang out together, hug, and not wear masks. Somehow in the conversation she commented on how nice it was that we connect to each other so regularly.

I reluctantly told her how I was making sure we were staying connected.

Ever since COVID forced me and everyone else into this locked down, work-from-home-and-don’t-go-anywhere mode a year ago, I found myself feeling really isolated and disconnected from my friends. Prior to March of 2020 (which was when I coincidentally moved 45 miles south of my long-time residence), I attended several social events a month, plus setup dinners and lunches with friends on a regular basis.

All of that came to a screeching halt 13 months ago.

By the time December 2020 rolled around—as I was addressing my holiday cards—I realized how much I missed seeing my friends. Posting on Instagram and Facebook just wasn’t cutting it!

So, I took a page from my business life and started a quasi-project list.

On a piece of paper, I made a list of those friends and family who I consider my closest and dearest connections. (Disclaimer: I am an over-the-top extrovert, so my list includes around 25-30 people.) You can read more about that process . . . [Here]

Then, across the top of the page, I wrote the names of the months: January, February, March, etc. As I go through each month, I glance at the list and see how I’m doing about creating and maintaining a connection.

When I started in January, it was not until the end of the month that I glanced at the list. I did not have many “checks” on my list, so I immediately made a few phone calls, and sent a few texts. I put a bright red check by each persons’ name when I connected with them.

In February, I was better about glancing at my list earlier in the month and was reminded it was time to “check in” with some of my friends who I had not spoken with. At that time, only I was fully vaccinated, so I knew most of my friends would not be ready to meet in person.

But, by mid-March, I started sending texts and emails similar to this: “Hey! I am fully vaccinated, how about you? Would love to get together when you feel comfortable.” It was so fun to meet a friend at a nearby patio restaurant to have lunch together. Others told me when they would be fully vaccinated and we started planning for the day we would be able to meet up in person.

This past weekend was the first time I had a friend come to my house! The night before, we had dinner with two other couples at a friend’s home.

It was like old times.

How is it going for you? Are you fully vaccinated? Or is that date coming soon? Are you wondering how best to approach your friends and family who might be hesitant to get together after a year of being isolated? I found that a text message suggesting you are ready “when they are comfortable” is a gentle way to nudge someone. Not too pushy, but suggestive.

So, make a list. After a year of not seeing people in person, you may need the reminder to meet up with those “regular connection” people. Or the folks you are just jonesing to see.

My goal is to set up one or two in-person meetings each week, plus phone calls. Maybe we start with a during-the-week lunch with a friend near the office, and then brunch or dinner on the weekend with someone who lives closer to my home. It’s like I am easing back into my normal social life.

I know it may sound a little too businesslike to make reconnecting with your family and friends a project. But I found it actually made me feel more comfortable … and more connected.

Reconnecting with those closest to you can be the anecdote to feeling isolated and fearful. Let me know how it goes for you!

Karen

Okay, so maybe I am a little prejudiced, but when a well-published children’s book author contacted me three years ago and said she planned to write a book about my mom, Frieda Rapoport Caplan, I was so excited! I’ve always found kids are fascinated (and grateful) when they discover that it was my mom who is credited with introducing kiwifruit to America in 1962. Honestly, who can imagine a world before kiwifruit?

Here’s how it happened. About three years ago, Mara Rockliff—an author of more than 75 children’s books—sent an ordinary email to our company. Mara had taken a trip to Israel organized by the nonprofit PJ Library for children’s authors and illustrators, and she was inspired to think about Jewish subjects she might write about. When she got back, she dug around and found an amazing resource called the “Jewish Women’s Archive,” and decided to scroll through the listing alphabetically. There are hundreds of women listed, so thank goodness my mom was listed under “Caplan”… near the front of the alpha listing. As luck would have it, the photo image under my mom’s listing was a green kiwifruit slice, not an image of her face like most everyone else’s!

That spurred Mara to research Frieda a bit more, and in the end, Frieda’s story was too intriguing to pass up! See more of why Mara decided to write the book here: Just Try It: An Interview with Mara Rockliff

As you can imagine, we get dozens of email inquiries every week through our website, mostly from consumers. I’ve always told our team that we treat every inquiry with equal importance. It didn’t take long for the message to make its way from our marketing team to me, and I immediately sent Mara an email.

From that moment on, Mara and I exchanged close to a dozen emails with her asking me all sorts of questions over the next 12 months. For instance:

What was Frieda’s favorite color before the sign-painter painted her first company sign a light lavender?
Why did Frieda never learn to cook?
When Frieda said “I feel it in my elbows” about a product she is considering that she thinks will be a winner—does she mean that literally?
Are artichokes and eggplant still her favorite vegetables? And is kiwi her favorite fruit? (Fun fact: my mom actually developed an allergy to kiwifruit and could not eat it! Mango was her favorite fruit.)

So, in early February it was with great joy that I received a large box containing two copies of “TRY IT! How Frieda Caplan Changed the Way We Eat.” The book was completed in early 2020 and was finally published in hardcover format on January 12, 2021, by Beach Lane Books, a subsidiary of the huge publishing entity Simon & Schuster.

Book Cover: Simon & Schuster Try-It! by Mara Rockliff, Illustrated by Giselle Potter

As I paged through the book and saw the hand-painted illustrations by Giselle Potter of my mom always in a purple dress (which is exactly how she dressed), talking with a buyer about a flat of brown, fuzzy kiwifruit—I got chills. There were pages loaded with images of her discoveries (like mangosteen in 2008, habanero peppers in 1990 and dragonfruit in 1994). Unreal!

Frieda “feeling it in her elbows”

Mom at the L.A. Produce Market in the early days

To have my mom recognized by a complete industry outsider for her amazing contributions to changing the way America eats was mind boggling, and so gratifying. I never had a chance to tell mom about the book, as I wanted to surprise her with it after it was actually published. As you know, my mom passed away 14 months ago.

But as my sister Jackie and my eldest daughter Alex looked at the newly minted book, we knew exactly what mom would have wanted us to do.

And that is, to share the great news of this book during the week of our company anniversary. And that’s exactly why I have waited until this week to announce it.

This week, on April 2, we will be celebrating our 59^th company anniversary! And what better way to celebrate than to tell all our friends about this amazing children’s book?

Because we think it is such a great story—full of inspiration for all ages, but especially for young children, we want to make sure it is a #1 best seller! There are many places you can purchase the book online, but because we want to make it an Amazon #1 best seller, we are asking all our friends to help us accomplish this by purchasing the book at the exact same day and time (this will help the algorithm recognize the book and push it to the top of the list!) I learned this technique from a book author who has had three Amazon #1 best sellers!

So, if you are so inclined, please click this link Try It! How Frieda Caplan Changed the Way We Eat and purchase one or more copies of “TRY IT!” On Friday, April 2, at 9:00 a.m. PST (or 12:00 p.m. EST).

This book is not only a great tribute to the first lady of produce, Frieda Rapoport Caplan, but it is a great way to introduce a new generation of young kids to some of the weirdest looking fruits and veggies—dragonfruit, mangosteen, fresh lychee, starfruit, donut peaches, green cauliflower and purple asparagus.

When you receive your copy and read through it, I’m hoping you will get the same chills that Jackie, Alex and I got. It’s a fitting tribute to share with you on our company anniversary! And, in keeping with company tradition, know that we will be celebrating our anniversary the same way we do every year—by gathering our employees all together (physically distanced) and handing out purple-frosted cupcakes!

Me, Mom and Alex celebrated our company anniversary a few years ago – with purple frosted cupcakes!

The book has already received rave reviews and is the perfect way to inspire the little ones in your life. For more information, please visit: Simon & Schuster Try-It! by Mara Rockliff, Illustrated by Giselle Potter and TRY IT! for yourself!

Enjoy and happy reading!

Karen

Reminder, if you are so inclined, please click this link Try It! How Frieda Caplan Changed the Way We Eat and purchase one or more copies of “TRY IT!” On Friday, April 2, at 9:00 a.m. PST (or 12:00 p.m. EST) and help us make this book an Amazon #1 best seller.

Last week we went on a long-planned mini-vacation to northern California. Because our drive to Carmel was a long one (350 miles), we had to borrow a gas-powered car to make the drive (another unintended consequence of purchasing an all-electric car, is that my car’s range is only 200 miles before it requires a 12-hour charge).

The trip didn’t start as a “vacation” … my partner Jack had three speaking gigs (two virtual and one live) in the Monterey area, and we decided to add a few days to the trip and play several rounds of golf. So we packed up our golf clubs and road trip snacks (Kumquats being my go to) and hit the road!

About four years ago I purchased a set of golf clubs and started taking lessons. I blogged about “The Zen of Golf” and shared some of the lessons I learned. One of the silver linings of COVID in 2020 was that playing golf outdoors was one of the few things that did not stop during the various “lockdowns,” so about six months ago, I decided to make the time to get better at golf. Jack and I golf once a week, plus I have taken a few more lessons from our local golf pro.

So now I had the opportunity to step outside my comfort zone (which includes playing only on my home course each week) to play golf at the famed Pebble Beach Golf Links in Carmel, CA. To say I was a bit nervous/excited/apprehensive would be an understatement.

Pebble Beach is one of several courses in the area that is rated quite difficult and, of course, is where the legendary AT&T Pro-am Golf Tournament takes place every year. The grounds are stunningly beautiful with many holes overlooking the gorgeous California coast.

We watched the weather forecast before we left for our road trip. We had planned to play four rounds of golf while we were in Carmel, so it was concerning that rain was in the forecast. I kept a positive attitude the entire time, hoping my positive “weather karma” would help chase away those clouds and showers.

Unfortunately, my weather karma did not work.

When we got in the car on Thursday at noon to drive to Pebble Beach, it was drizzling intermittently. “Maybe it will stop” was what I kept thinking. No such luck. The drizzle continued. And there was no rescheduling our round of golf to another (rain free) day … we were told that it would be impossible to find another tee time on such short notice.

So, I sucked it up and donned four layers of clothing (the temperature was hovering around 50 degrees all day) and a golf hat.

As I look back on that four-and-a-half-hour round of golf, there were many positives:

1. We got to play as a twosome, which is much faster than a foursome.
2. Because of the almost torrential rain, everyone in front of us was playing fast, so there wasn’t a lot of waiting between holes.
3. I actually shot par (a three) on Hole #7! Here are a couple of photos, so you can see how small the target green was … and if I had overshot or undershot, I would have been in big trouble! I feel like I have bragging rights for that par 3!

Karen at Hole #7 – Target Green Karen Celebrating Par 3 at Hole #7 – Bragging Rights

And I learned a few lessons during that round, too:

1. Even though I was soaked to the bone, I was forced to not quit early. Unlike most courses, once you start on Hole #1 at Pebble Beach you do not end up near the clubhouse until you finish Hole #18. In my head, I was thinking we might stop after Hole #9 … but we were so far away from the clubhouse that we had to continue. Has that ever happened to you? You want to quit after starting something, but you can’t, as you are far away from your home base. It reminds me of the first time I soloed as a pilot in a Cessna 152 … once I was in the air by myself, I had to stick with it and concentrate, as I could not quit (even though I was super nervous), until I landed the plane.

2. I got better at using the clubs I hate. Like the sand wedge. I used to dread hitting a golf ball and having it land in a sand trap (aka “bunker”). But, I got significantly better that day getting out of a bunker and onto the green because I had lots of practice. Have you noticed that happens to you, too? Maybe you’re not great at a certain skill, but as they say, “practice makes progress.” We all get better with practice.

Karen in the “bunker”— Practice Makes Progress

3. Due to the constant drizzle, my hands and clubs got wet. Several times while I was swinging the club, it slipped in my hand, sending the ball in a direction I did not want. What I learned was the importance of having a dry towel handy, a spare glove or two in my bag, and planning my club needs in advance of getting out of the cart. Do you ever show up to a meeting and realize you forgot something important that you need in your presentation? How do you prevent that? You visualize the situation in advance and role play, which allows you to anticipate your needs and how the meeting will go. Of course, I brought lots of extra golf balls with me, but I never thought about packing an extra golf glove in my bag.

Golfing in the rain definitely taught me contingency planning, the importance of regular practice and the benefit of self-determination. It also taught me to appreciate the beauty of a situation, even if it is not exactly what I had expected. The lush green fairways and the pounding waves of the ocean were dramatic and breathtaking. If I had been only worrying about my score, I would have missed all of that.
So next time you are in a situation that is not exactly what you expected or planned for, take a deep breath and find something to appreciate! Your attitude can make all the difference in the world. And, who knows, you may find a silver lining.

Karen

Jack & me at the famed Pebble Beach Golf Links Carmel, CA – Silver Linings

Who would ever have thought the primary topic of conversation with friends, family members and strangers would be: Have you been vaccinated yet? I actually chuckle internally every time I ask someone this question. It seems so personal, yet—despite all the federal legislation (i.e. HIPAA laws) meant to protect our medical information from being shared freely and publicly—everyone is talking about it.

And then, of course, the next question is, “Moderna or Pfizer?” And now, Johnson & Johnson has their vaccine approved, so I am guessing the conversation will change again.

The challenge for some of us is securing an appointment to get the first (and second) shots. We had planned to go to Hawaii last October, but due to a snafu at our local (Hawaii travel-approved) drug store where we had our COVID test scheduled, we had to cancel our planned vacation. So, I have been paying close attention to the news and social media to see how successful my friends have been in getting their vaccines.

As luck would have it, two months ago, a friend posted a photo on Facebook of her 75-year-old mother getting her first vaccine at Planned Parenthood here in Orange County, California. I know that Planned Parenthood is well-known for providing affordable health care services for women and men, but I had no idea they were delivering vaccines. So, I texted my friend, and it turned out that Planned Parenthood was giving vaccines to a small group of staff, board members, etc. Since they provide health care services that made sense to me, just like other health care workers would have priority access to the vaccine. Well, due to my persistence and interest, I was able to get an access code for Jack and me to get vaccinated a few days later at our local Planned Parenthood.

I have to say, it was invigorating to have an access code, and I almost couldn’t sleep the night before in anticipation. Our first vaccine was on Sunday January 31, and—besides a slightly sore arm—there were no immediate side effects. However, I did sense a bit more fatigue during the following week, but it could be that I have been working out a lot lately and didn’t take a break when we received our shots.

(Jack and me after getting our first vaccine)

Four weeks later we received a text reminder of our appointment for our second vaccine. Like most people, I had read mixed messages about the potential for a reaction to the second shot. Most people (whether the vaccine was from Moderna or Pfizer) said they only had a slightly sore arm after the first vaccine and then it was a split reaction after the second. You either had NO reaction, or you got the chills and a fever and spent a day resting in bed.

Having no idea how we would react, both Jack and I cleared our calendar for the day after our second vaccines. As luck would have it, Jack had no reaction at all. No soreness, no fatigue, nothing. And me? Even though I set my mind that I would have no reaction, I got progressively colder and colder about 3 hours after my second shot, and I was pretty lethargic that evening. I went to bed early, and found myself with a slight fever all night (around 100 degrees). I took it easy the next day, staying in bed and sleeping, and at about 3 p.m. I got up and took a shower. By 6 p.m. (32 hours after the shot), I felt completely normal!

I spoke to many, many friends who had Moderna like we did, and also to those who had the Pfizer vaccine. There was no consistency in how people physically reacted to their second vaccine. Except that everyone had a sense of relief! Being vaccinated makes it feel like you’re one step closer to getting back to a “normal” life.

So here is my advice to you, if you have not yet arranged to get vaccinated:

The science is clear. Getting vaccinated will protect you from severe COVID-19. There is no guarantee that you won’t get the virus, but if you do, it should be extremely mild.
Be persistent in signing up to get vaccinated. If you are waiting for someone to call you and let you know you can get it, you will likely be waiting a very long time. Longer than is necessary. Do a search on the Internet for your county. Here in So Cal, there are many ways to sign up. But if you don’t spend at least 30-45 minutes online doing a search, you will be last in line.
Check with your employer or your health care provider to see if they can assist you in getting an access code or priority access. Being persistent and diligent helps! (Several of my co-workers successfully helped each other find ways to sign up, even though they are younger than 65.)
Tell everyone you know once you are vaccinated! Spreading the good news, whether by posting photos on social media or just having conversations, lets other people know they can feel confident to do the same. Confidence creates more confidence!

One of the best sources of rational and accurate information I have received has been from a blog/newsletter written by Dr. Lucy Miller McBride, an internal medicine doctor based in Washington, D.C. She is upbeat, realistic and always has the most current information, based on facts and science. You can visit her website here . . . Lucy McBride, MD. I encourage you to sign up for her newsletter.

I’m looking forward to traveling and entertaining and going back to more normal times! Feel free to share your vaccination story with me!

Karen

You may remember the feature film The Social Network, which came out in 2010 and told the story of the founding of Facebook by Mark Zuckerberg. It seemed to glamorize the genesis of this social media behemoth.

Fast forward to 2020. At about the same time as the U.S. Congress was holding hearings with the CEOs of Facebook, Google (Alphabet), and Twitter—exploring their near domination of the social media world, including accusations of influencing political elections and manipulation—comes a full-length documentary called The Social Dilemma. This film features a look behind the curtains of Facebook and all social media platforms. What a difference a decade has made!

I first learned about this Netflix documentary through my friend Laurie David, who was one of the executive producers of the film. You may recognize her name, as she also produced An Inconvenient Truth in 2006 (the first film exposing and warning us about global warming and climate change) and she teamed up with news anchor Katie Couric to produce Fed Up, about the causes of obesity in the United States. Laurie clearly is passionate about educating and opening the eyes of consumers to societal and global challenges. And when Laurie speaks, or is involved in a cause, people listen.

I felt so fortunate to have been invited to a Zoom session last week that Laurie hosted featuring The Social Dilemma’s director, Jeff Orlowski and Tristan Harris (featured prominently in the documentary). We were all asked to watch the film before the session.

So, a few weeks ago, Jack and I opened our Netflix account and launched The Social Dilemma. That’s after we had both spent time that evening doing what we always do after dinner: holding our smart phones and checking our Facebook feed, Instagram stories and connections through LinkedIn. Frankly, I didn’t exactly know what the documentary was about, but Laurie and another friend Miriam both told me it would change my view of social media. So, we set our iPhones down on the table and tuned in.

Do you ever wonder why you get certain emails letting you know that someone tagged you on Facebook? Are you someone who can’t wake up or go to sleep without first checking your Instagram, Facebook or Pinterest feed just one more time? Do you find yourself feeling strangely addicted to scrolling through posts, spending minutes and sometimes hours a day doing so? There is evidence presented in the film on why you feel that way! And it’s not a pretty story.

The essence of the film presents real-life examples of the purposeful, manipulative effects of social media. They show a young teen girl who posted a selfie. Someone commented on the size of her ears, and you could see her ease into a depressive state. Another young man received (unsolicited and ongoing) targeted Facebook posts featuring ongoing messages of hate, paranoia and racism—so much so, that he felt compelled to attend a local rally and ended up being arrested. (The scary thing is, he was in disbelief about what had happened, as he didn’t realize how he ended up going to it.)

The film was eye-opening in terms of how much social media channels like Facebook, etc., know about you, manipulate you and eventually can impact your beliefs and behaviors. They interviewed dozens of people for the film who formerly worked for firms like Instagram, Facebook, Pinterest and Google, plus educators and researchers from prestigious universities like Harvard, along with social psychologists.

If you are a parent or grandparent, I highly, highly recommend you watch the film. Even better, watch it with your kids and grandkids. Have a conversation about addictive behavior and social media.

Thirty-six-year-old forward-thinker Tristan Harris is considered the conscience of Silicon Valley. He is president and co-founder of the Center for Humane Technology. Earlier, he worked as a design ethicist at Google and received a degree from Stanford University where he studied the ethics of human persuasion. He has given two TED talks. You can check them out [Here]—it will really get you thinking. He was one of the people featured in the film and it was amazing to hear his candid insights and thoughts “live” in addition to having seen him in the film.

The 37-year-old producer Jeff Orlowski, who directed and produced the film, actually referred to the effects of social media manipulation as “the climate change of culture.” He has produced other films, including the Emmy-award winning documentary Chasing Ice and Chasing Coral (about the effects of climate change).

So, if you’re wondering if my thoughts are just one lone opinion, it might be reassuring to know that The Social Dilemma was the #1 most viewed film on Netflix in September 2020 and the #2 viewed film of all time! Clearly there is something significantly eye-opening and worthwhile about this film.

Click here to watch the movie trailer: Social Dilemma Trailer

I hope you will watch the trailer and then the film. I would love to know what you think about the damaging societal impact of social media and what changes you are going to make in your behavior.

By the way, both Jeff and Tristan were highly positive and optimistic about the future and feel that openly sharing information about current social media will wake people up and will force change that will produce a healthier society. That made me feel very optimistic and happy!

Karen

P.S. Today is National Day of Unplugging. This awareness campaign elevates the human connection by promoting a 24-hour break from technology to inspire healthy living and tech balance. Will you accept the challenge?

“Connecting & communicating in the time of COVID-19.” This was the title of a flyer I received from my Temple a few weeks ago. Like most people, I have not been in person to a church, a temple or any kind of religious service for a year due to COVID restrictions. Our temple has done what most religious organizations have done and that is rely on Zoom to hold services, events, etc. I’ve even attended a funeral via Zoom.

When I received this webinar flyer, I felt a special connection: the speaker, Dr. Lois Abrams, is a lifelong friend—a psychotherapist who helped me through some of my darkest divorce moments and actually encouraged my youngest daughter Sophia to pursue HER dream to become a marriage and family therapist (Sophia will graduate in 10 weeks with a master’s degree).

So, last Thursday evening, I attended the virtual program with Lois speaking. The content was particularly relevant, so I wanted to share some of the insights with you. And, thankfully, Lois interspersed a bit of humor into the evening, which made it a lighter conversation.

As you can probably guess, Lois uses dogs as part of her therapy practice. I believe she was one of the first therapists to use animals to help treat patients and she has spoken across the country and personally trained many therapists on how therapy dogs can assist in identification, treatment and recovery.

So, now to the topic of the evening: COVID. First Lois acknowledged the cultural, gender and age differences in reactions to the pandemic. It may come as a surprise to learn that everyone does not react the same to the situation. There are proven racial differences, gender differences and, as far as age goes, some of the youngest children do the best with mask wearing. In contrast, high school and college students may feel cheated out of their educational experiences of the rites of passage and, as we’ve seen, may not believe that fraternity and sorority parties are not really the best idea (as these events can become “super spreaders” for COVID).

Lois called COVID-19 the “emotional pandemic.” Most of us when we watch the news are aware of the physical effects (illness, hospitalization, recovery and sometimes death), but have we acknowledged the emotional effects of isolation and feelings of abandonment? One of the most significant effects of the pandemic has been the large numbers of people who are experiencing significant depression. I have several friends who have mentioned to me their own friends and family who are suffering from COVID-induced depression. The effects are real.

Have you ever thought about the similarities between the pandemic and PTSD (post-traumatic stress disorder)? Is the reaction we are seeing from many people during COVID similar to symptoms of PTSD?

*Isolation

*Feeling overwhelmed

*Moody

*Irritable

*Sleep issues

*Fears

*Overeating and not eating

*Drinking in excess

*Intrusive thoughts and images

*Blaming others

*Nightmares

*Heightened or lowered alertness

*Guilt

*Anxiety

*Agitation

Lois said that these are all normal reactions to an abnormal situation when we feel anxious, depressed or frustrated.

So then, Lois turned to what YOU can do during COVID—for yourself. Like with any circumstance, you can let things happen, or you can take control and make things happen! Here are a few of her suggestions about simple actions you can take to help you, or your loved one, deal with the reactions to the isolation and loneliness felt from COVID.

*Journal writing—you can write both about frustrations and gratitude. I hear a lot about expressing gratitude … but how about being “real” and also acknowledging the frustrations? I have found that once you talk about them out loud, they actually seem to subside.

*What about writing letters to family and friends? I certainly have started doing this, and I believe a handwritten and addressed note, in my own handwriting, shows I am sending “love and caring” to someone. How about writing one handwritten card a week? That’s a good start.

*Talk on the phone with family or friends. Pre-COVID, we never had enough time in the day to call friends … well, now we do! Try it! I know that I have started to do this more often, and I have found it to be quite enjoyable.

*It’s okay to send text messages as a way to check in with friends, clients or family. If you don’t feel like writing a letter or calling them, a quick text lets them know you are thinking about them.

*Facetime is a great tool. (My two daughters and I used Facetime so we could be together all eight nights of Hanukkah in December … it was amazing!)

*Self talk—sometimes it’s helpful to talk to yourself out loud, perhaps when you are in the car, or in the bathroom by yourself.

*Spiritual Prayer—prayer or meditation is very personal and can be quite grounding. Perhaps using some quiet time to reduce stress may be helpful.

*Playing music—try listening to or playing calming music or your favorites. My mom Frieda always had classical music blaring inside her house. When I was younger, I was annoyed by that. Now I find that hearing music while I am inside my house grounds me and makes me feel less lonely, even when I am alone.

On a more physical note, Lois also talked about the importance of getting physical … exercising and gardening (being outdoors). Doing physical exercise stimulates endorphins in your system which makes you feel better! It’s not just the burning of calories we’re talking about here—it’s creating positivity with movement.

And of course, she emphasized that the simple act of petting a dog or cat is proven to lower your blood pressure (and stress). No wonder that adopt-a-pet and rescue organizations have seen increased interest in their services! Believe it or not, some places in the U.S. have no pets to adopt—they ran out!

So, until we are all vaccinated and are free to visit our closest friends and family members, I hope my friend Dr. Lois Abrams’ advice resonates with you in some way. I can say that I am 100% positive that my own increase in exercise level during COVID has helped me greatly in feeling positive and not so isolated. And hand writing notes (108 written so far this year) to family, friends and business colleagues has become a new habit that I actually love!

Remember that old saying: Don’t worry—be happy!

Karen

So, in case you haven’t heard, having the name “Karen” is not necessarily a good thing these days. I’m sure my parents had no idea that choosing “Karen” as my first name would be an issue in future years. Apparently (according to Urban Dictionary) the definition of a “Karen”:

Is a middle-aged woman, typically blonde, who makes solutions to others’ problems an inconvenience to her although she isn’t even remotely affected.
Sues the local city council after they installed a new STOP sign that hides the sun from her window for two minutes a day.
Refuses to wear a face mask for her five-minute trip to the supermarket during a pandemic and harasses the workers, asks to see the manager and threatens to sue when they ask her to wear a mask.
Complains that her favorite parking spot was replace by a ramp for wheelchairs and parks her car in the old spot anyway.

This new pop culture label actually got a write up on Newsweek.com last May What Is a ‘Karen’? If Somebody’s Called You One Chances Are You Spoke to Their Manager. The article refers to another website “Know Your Meme” and says the term can be used to describe someone “characterized as an irritating, entitled woman, sometimes an ex-wife who took custody of “the kids.” Basically, calling someone a “Karen” is a gentle way of reminding them that they are a b**ch!

And, if that wasn’t enough, if you watched the Super Bowl two weeks ago and viewed the M&M’S Super Bowl Commercial “Come together” . . . you saw that my name was featured in their 30-second spot:

When I first heard the term, I laughed it off. In fact, I never even researched what “being a Karen” meant until after the Super Bowl ad, when a friend thought it might be a good blogpost. These “funny” not so funny Karen memes and references have absolutely blown up on social media and are making life problematic for some people actually named Karen. None of this pop culture phenom really bothers me. I’m confident in who I am and what I do, but it is setting a bad example and Name Calling is never ok.

According to a September 9, 2020, article in the Huffington Post:

Nameberry co-founder and CEO Pamela Redmond told People in July that she felt “sure” that “Karen is going to become one of those names that no parent wants to give their child.” Names associated with controversial figures and events often fall in popularity, which is why there aren’t many young Adolfs or Katrinas in preschool classes these days.

But this isn’t always the case, according to Bellevue University psychology professor and former president of the American Name Society Cleveland K. Evans. He told the Associated Press in 2007 that publicity around a particular name, whether positive or negative, usually boosts its popularity.

So will we actually see a rise in the number of newborn Karens in 2020? We’ll have to wait until the SSA releases the data next year.”

The popularity of my first name has been dropping since it peaked in popularity in 1965 when it was the third most popular name for baby girls. As you can see, in 2019 it dropped to number 660 as a popular name:

SOCIAL SECURITY ADMINISTRATION

I guess we will have to wait and see what happens in the naming game…

Do yourself and your favorite Karen a favor: remember that not every Karen is “a Karen” and take a moment to send your favorite Karen a virtual hug today. Meanwhile, you can call me Karen!

Karen

If you recall, my list of goals for 2020 included reading 40 books for the year. It was amazing to me that I sailed right through that goal and achieved 52 books! That’s an average of one a week. It really helps that I can listen to most books while I walk by having the Audible app loaded on my mobile phone. And, now that I have long drives to and from work, I listen to books in the car. (Hint: With Audible, you can increase the speed of the book. On some books, I can listen to them at 2X speed, meaning a 10-hour book only takes five hours to listen to. Sometimes, I can only listen at 1.6X speed—it really depends on who is narrating the book and how understandable their diction is at such a fast speed.)

My first month of this year, I was a bit of an overachiever. I completed 10 books! Now that you know my secret of listening to books at 2X speed, you realize how I am able to get through so many books. It’s not a contest for me, but rather I find it really enriches my life. My favorite books are either autobiographies, biographies, or history books. Some of my favorites from January include “Mrs. Kennedy and Me” (authored by Clint Hill, the secret service agent assigned to Jacqueline Kennedy when her husband became President) and “Leadership in Turbulent Times” by Doris Kearns Goodwin, which highlights the leadership lessons and connections of Presidents Abraham Lincoln, Theodore Roosevelt, Franklin Delano Roosevelt and Lyndon Baines Johnson. I highly recommend both books, and if you are in a book club, they would make for fabulous discussion.

This month, as you know, is Black History Month, and at first it seemed like a coincidence that the first book I chose to listen to in February was “Caste: The Origins of Our Discontents” by Isabel Wilkerson.

I had downloaded it last month, along with the two books I mentioned above, as a dear friend recommended all three books to me. The 14-hour length was a bit intimidating, but as soon as I started the book, I realized why it has been named the No. 1 Nonfiction Book of the Year by Time Magazine, was one of Oprah’s Book Club picks, and was longlisted for the national book award. It is personal, it is serious, and it is a historical recounting of the powerful caste system that influences peoples’ lives and behavior and the nation’s fate. It was eye-opening, as Ms. Wilkerson linked the caste systems of America, India, and Nazi Germany. Because of my Jewish heritage, it felt more personal to read about how the Nazi’s studied the racial systems in America to plan their out-casting of the Jews.

If you want to have a better understanding of the roots of the Black Lives Matter movement, why tensions are so high about voter rights, and various other political and emotional issues, I highly recommend this deeply researched book.

My second book was “It Worked for Me” by retired General Colin Powell. My favorite books are those which are read by the author, and General Powell read the book. I did NOT read it at 2X the speed, as I wanted to enjoy his voice and to hear him tell his stories. He recounted his 13 Rules of Life and the story behind them. The best part was the epilogue of the book, during which General Powell told the story of reading a story to his grandson while being recorded for a television show. He wrote the book to feel like a personal story and it was very authentic.

Now I am on to my third book of the month. By now I have set a goal to read about Black history or books authored by Black writers in February, and after much research I chose “My Life, My Love, My Legacy” by Coretta Scott King, the widow of the late Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr. It has been wonderful to read about how they met, how Dr. King fell instantly in love with Coretta, how they were truly soulmates, and the birth of their four children. I was a young girl when Dr. King was gunned down and murdered in Memphis, TN, at the age of 39. I learned that at the age of 35 he was the youngest man to have received the Nobel Peace Prize for his work as a leader of the American Civil Rights movement, but, more notably, that he took his ideals not only from Christianity, but also from the operational techniques of Gandhi (the recognized, non-elected leader of India). I have not yet finished the book, but it is incredible to learn about the strength and conviction of Mrs. King, even after the death of her husband left her with four young children. She died of ovarian cancer in 2006 at the age of 78 after successfully establishing The King Center for Nonviolent Social Change in Atlanta, GA. Visiting The King Center is now on my bucket list.

How about you? What are you reading these days? Why not use the rest of this month to learn more about Black History? Next month is Women’s History Month … I’m already making my list!

Karen

Even I, the most non-sports-oriented person on the planet, know that this weekend is SUPER BOWL LV. And that the Tampa Bay Buccaneers are facing the Kansas City Chiefs. And that an even bigger story is the tale of the two quarterbacks. Tom Brady, age 43, of Tampa Bay will face Patrick Mahomes, age 25, of Kansas City. That’s an amazing and kind of crazy match up in itself, if you think about it.

But I want to share the back story on how I know the guy who authored, “12 Lessons in Business Leadership; Insights from the Championship Career of Tom Brady.” Yes, if you are wondering how Tom Brady led his team to multiple wins and the 10^th SUPER BOWL of his career, this book probably has the answers for you.

The guy who wrote the book is Kevin Daum. You may recognize his name, as he has penned more than 1,000 articles for Inc. Magazine. He is an Adjunct Professor at Fordham University in New York at the Gabelli School of Business. Because he is not an over achiever, he also does podcasts (10 Minute Tips from the TOP) and serves as a coach for people needing marketing and business advice. This is his sixth book. I asked Kevin what’s his “superpower”—the secret to his success as a writer and teacher. He told me that he is good at taking complex subjects and making them simple.

That’s probably why the publisher Skyhorse Publishing called him a few years ago and said, “Hey Kevin, we think there is a story here on leadership lessons and Tom Brady. Would you write a book about that?” (Frankly, that was not the answer I expected when I called Kevin earlier this week to find out the back story on his book featuring Tom Brady.)

I’ve always heard that most sports teams are run better than most companies, notes the foreword of his book. Because they have a Playbook, they Practice and they have a Professional Coach.* So, Kevin (and co-author and collaborator Anne Mary Ciminelli) set out to uncover what the secret lessons were from Tom Brady’s unquestioned success. But the most interesting thing about this book is that Kevin and Anne Mary did NOT speak to Tom Brady! They actually chose to review all the public information on Brady and his style, and then they validated their conclusions by consulting some well-respected business coaches and owners.

Because they are using public information and are writing “about” Tom Brady, they did not have to talk to Brady, nor did they have to get his permission before writing the book. Which, IMHO, makes the book more authentic; there is no autobiographical spin.

What are Tom Brady’s 12 Lessons in Business Leadership?

Creating A Winning Playbook
Make Time Your Ally
Lead Through Each And Every Moment
Meetings Are A Championship Tool
Empower The Team And Hold Them Accountable
Always Prepare For Crisis
Trust Is the Twelfth Man
Elevate Everyone
Talk To People Where They Are
Executing Team Success
Attitude Is Everything
Live The Image

I asked Kevin what he thought Tom Brady’s superpower was. He thought deeply, and said there are two: Attitude and he talks to people where they are.

So, if this book sounds of interest to you and you want to order it, I would ask that you wait until Friday, February 5 at 12:00 p.m. PT/ 3 p.m. ET to order it on Amazon—because I want to support my friend Kevin in making his book an Amazon #1 bestseller! How do you do that? By reaching out into your network and all your friends’ networks and asking them all to make their purchase at the very same time. This causes a spike in demand, pushing the book to the top of the list!

The publisher of the book, along with all of Kevin’s clients, followers and friends are all asking that we make that purchase at the same time: Friday, February 5 at 12:00 p.m. PT/ 3:00 p.m. ET. Here is the link again: 12 Lessons in Business Leadership; Insights from the Championship Career of Tom Brady

So on Sunday, while I am watching the Super Bowl, cozying up with some delicious fresh jackfruit chili, I will be thinking about the difference a great leader makes in the success of his/her team. I will be thinking about having a playbook, talking to people where they are and empowering the team and holding them accountable.

And I will be thinking about my friend Kevin and his co-author Anne Mary, and wondering if they will be studying Tom Brady’s moves on the field and in the locker room.

Karen

P.S. I promised to share how I know Kevin. Well, Kevin is business colleague of my partner Jack, and our first date in 2019 was to take a hike up a huge mountain in San Diego County with Kevin and his wife Van. We spent the weekend with them, and that’s when I got to witness what a smart guy Kevin is.

*The quotes above are taken from the foreword of the book, which was written by Jack.

Jack, Karen, Kevin and Van ready to start their hike up Potato Chip Rock.

A few months ago, just days before my big birthday (the one that makes me eligible to get vaccinated later this week), Jack and I went to test drive a car. My car lease was expiring in a few months and I thought it would be fun to test drive a car model that I had never driven before. I wanted a fast car and a sedan.

So, Jack convinced me to test drive a Jaguar. I’ve never had a Jaguar, and they have a cool-sounding name, so I thought it would be a fun afternoon. We met at the Jaguar dealership on my way home from work one day in late October. Jack had already selected the car he thought I would enjoy driving. We hopped into the car—me in the driver’s seat, Jack next to me, and the sales guy in the back. Yes, we were all masked up!

That car was fast. Like a rocket! I loved it. It was after I floored it and was going 80 mph within seconds that the sales guy told me it was an all-electric vehicle. Not a hybrid—a 100% electric car. A Jaguar i-Pace.

The whole evening went by so fast—the excitement of driving a super-fast all-electric car was so mesmerizing that I decided on the spot to trade in my Lexus and get the Jaguar. It was like an early birthday present to myself (I took delivery the day before my birthday).

Here’s what’s interesting. The car salesman only asked me one question that evening of my purchase: what color did I want? That made me assume that every vehicle had the same features, with the only difference being the color. He didn’t ask me a single question about my driving habits. For example, he could have asked me, do you drive long distances because this i-Pace only has a distance range of 210 miles? Nope—he didn’t ask me that, and if he did, he would’ve discovered my round-trip drive to work is 100 miles, and if I go up to see my daughter in L.A. it is a round trip of over 150 miles.

Or, have you thought about how you are going to charge the car? Will you install a car charging contraption in your garage (at a cost of nearly $1,000) to charge your car, or do you plan to locate and then charge your car at a ChargePoint station, where there’s a fee per kilowatt every time you charge? And, of course, he could’ve said: you will need to download the ChargePoint app to locate charging stations along the freeway, in case you need to charge your car when you are “out and about.”

Or, my favorite question he did not ask, is it important to you that your trunk pop open when you click your car fob for when your hands are full of packages? Nope, he did not ask that question either.

Can you tell that I am still a bit annoyed by this whole experience? As I have reflected on my car purchase over the last three months, what bothers me most (besides the fact that I made a hasty decision) was that the salesperson did not ask me a single question. He seemed so anxious to make a one-time sale that he didn’t take the time to find out what was important to me. And because of that, I am 100% sure that I will never recommend that car dealership or salesperson to anyone. The lifetime value of me as a customer is nil.

What makes a great salesperson? Someone who takes the time to ask you questions about what is important to you. After 30+ years in sales I have learned that it’s all about doing your homework and that is the approach we take at my company Frieda’s, to really understand the needs of our customers. And if you uncover that your product or service is not right for the customer, then you help the customer find a better match for them. Remember the movie “Miracle on 34^th Street” where the Santa Claus at Macy’s referred customers to a local competitor (Gimbels) to find the gift they are looking for. The result? Incredible publicity and loyalty to Macy’s for doing what was best for the customer. People actually became MORE loyal to Macy’s after they started referring customers to other stores….to make them happy!

Have you ever encountered a salesperson who was super anxious to make the sale, so anxious that they kind of made you uneasy and made you think that maybe you were being taken advantage of, or would regret your purchase later on? That’s exactly how I felt after my Jaguar purchase.

Now, truth be told, I do like driving my Jaguar. It’s fast and quiet. But when I go super-fast (which I like to do), my driving range drops from 210 miles to about 180. I never have to take it in for maintenance service—just a once a year update for the internal electronic programming. I don’t miss stopping at a gas station to fuel up my car, but have had to always make sure I plan ahead on charging my car based on my next days’ driving plans.

I admit, the final, impulsive decision to buy the Jaguar was mine. And I learned a valuable lesson about not making such big investment decisions so quickly. I do realize that better decisions are made after some reflection, rather than on impulse. I plead guilty and am never too old to learn!

So, here is the pièce de résistance of this experience. I received a handwritten thank-you note last Friday. Well, actually, the card said “Congratulations!” on it. Three full months after I made the purchase, I received a card that said, “Congratulations and thank you.” Three full months later.

The guy didn’t have a baby or get married—for both occasions one is allowed an extended acceptable period of time to write thank-you notes. But for the purchase of a rather expensive car, during which you didn’t ask the customer a single thing about their wants and needs, it felt par for the course for him to send a thank-you note so long after the purchase.

So, for anyone who is in sales, please heed my advice:

The best salespeople will always take the time to ask questions to seek an understanding of the wants and needs of the customer. Your job is not to sell them something, you are there to help them buy.

And if you want to be a classy, memorable salesperson, you will immediately send a handwritten thank-you note, or a quick text, that demonstrates your genuine interest in and gratitude for the customer. Don’t wait three months, as you are demonstrating what a non-priority the customer was to you.

I haven’t had the heart to text my Lexus service consultant and tell him that I sold my Lexus a few months ago. I loved my Lexus service consultant Don and actually looked forward to seeing him every 3-4 months when I took my car in for service. In fact, he is the reason my next car will most likely be a Lexus.

Karen

Me, when I picked up my new car the day before my birthday – thus the bow!

About 15 years ago, I started seeing a Naturopath. Well, actually, I was looking for a nutritionist and a dear friend of mine recommended I see Lisa, who was not only a nutritionist but also a Naturopath. Naturopathic medicine is a system that uses natural remedies to help the body heal itself. I liked the idea of seeing a naturopath, as I took way too many antibiotics when I was younger and I decided that if there was a more natural way to feel better or heal when I was ill, I was super interested. And I had not been feeling 100%, but couldn’t put my finger on why.

As I readied for my first appointment, Lisa’s office called me and asked that I bring with me all medicines, supplements and vitamins I was taking.

First thing Lisa did, was “Muscle Test” me to see if I had any negative reactions (or intolerance) to any of the medications I was taking. What an eye-opening experience! Turns out, I had a negative reaction (like inflammation) to seven of the 11 things I was taking!! Surprisingly, it turned out that I was actually allergic to the coating on the vitamin brand I was taking. No wonder I was kind of achy and didn’t feel 100%.

Then she tested me for allergic reactions to about 100 different food substances. Things like every kind of nut (I can only eat Almonds and Sunflower seeds, I am allergic to all other kinds), nightshade plants (which include tomatoes, potatoes, and some of my previous favorites like graffiti eggplant and shishito peppers…..they cause inflammation for me, so I rarely eat any of them) and corn. I recall saying to her, “Can you tell me if it’s okay for me to drink coffee and eat chocolate?” Thankfully, both were okay for me.

And then there was soy. Turns out that weird feeling I got when I ate edamame, tofu and soy sauce was now explainable. I cannot eat soy. But, what I didn’t know was that I was also consuming soybean oil and didn’t realize it.

Have you ever read the label at the store when you buy “vegetable” oil? Well, if so, you would know that “vegetable” oil is almost always soybean oil. I guess someone figured out that “vegetable” oil sounds better than soybean oil. Plus, from what I know, soybean oil is the cheapest oil, so many producers and manufacturers use it for the cost benefit.

Due to my reaction to it, if I am purchasing oil for cooking, I now only purchase avocado oil or sunflower oil (and olive oil, of course).

Then I started thinking, “I wonder if restaurants and salad dressing companies use soybean oil when they cook or produce salad dressings?” Getting the lowest cost ingredient is oftentimes a big deciding factor in business, so I had a suspicion.

Yep, you guessed it. I started becoming a diligent label reader. Did you know that many ready-to-eat loaves of bread are made with soybean oil? So are frozen pie crusts. And almost all candies and chocolate contain “soy lecithin.” Check out that pasta sauce you buy in a jar—many contain soybean oil.

I don’t really want to get into the discussion of soy, GMOs and Monsanto’s pesticide Roundup, but you can guess there might be a connection.

So, last week when I was reading a recent article published by the University of California-Riverside titled “America’s most widely consumed oil causes genetic changes in the brain,” I had a feeling that they were talking about soybean oil.

“New UC Riverside research shows soybean oil not only leads to obesity and diabetes, but could also affect neurological conditions like autism, Alzheimer’s disease, anxiety and depression.” You can read the rest of the article here: EurekAlert! America’s most widely consumed oil causes genetic changes in the brain

So, next time you order french fries, taquitos or ready-made salad dressing, ask what kind of oil they use to fry or make the food. Although some restaurants and food producers use sunflower, safflower or canola oils, many more use “vegetable” oil (which probably means soybean oil).

Believe me, it was eye opening to read the article on the research linking soybean oil consumption to obesity, diabetes and Alzheimer’s. I think you’ll agree, it makes it even more important to ask or read a label to find out what goes into your food.

After all, we are what we eat!

Karen

We all have them. Shitty days. Admit it!

And in 2020, didn’t it seem like you had more than your fair share?

One day late last summer, I drove into the office for the day. It seemed like everything went wrong that day. I couldn’t get anything done on my To Do list. My meetings ran long. There were customer complaints that ended up coming to my desk. We had an incident in the warehouse (thankfully no one was seriously hurt).

And then, I had to drive home—my new, 45-minute, occasionally annoying commute home.

So, I did what most people do, I called a friend to vent. He said, “So how was your day?”

And I said, “It was shitty” and, consequently, I was in a shitty mood.

Then he said what was potentially the most life-changing comment to me:

“Everyone gets to choose what kind of day they have. Are you sure you want to choose shitty?”

I was slightly annoyed at that moment, but admitted, that, no, I didn’t WANT to choose shitty.

So my friend reminded me that we each get to choose how we react to stressful situations. Some people get up and walk away from their desk. Others power through stress. But, realistically, we choose how we react and what our mood will be. Will we take it out on the next person we see or talk to? Or will we take a few deep breaths, look out the window and daydream about something happy?

For me, ever since that day, when things are NOT going the way I expected, or tensions get high, I say to myself, “I get to choose what kind of day I want. Do I really want to choose shitty?” Saying those exact words are a positive trigger for me. It reminds me that my mood, my approach, my reaction is completely my choice.

I know I am NOT the only person who is having a rough day, and there are tons of people out there who have it far worse than I do. So, I mindfully decide, I am going to have a good day. I will make the best of things. Sometimes I get up from my desk and walk around just to clear my head. I might do a few deep breaths. Oftentimes when I meditate each morning, I set my intention for the day.

How about you? Ever have a rough day? Ever call a friend or coworker to vent? Ever feel yourself starting a pity party for yourself? So, how about this instead? Next time you are headed down that “whoa, poor me…” spiral, how about saying to yourself:

Everyone gets to choose what kind of day you have. Am I sure I want to choose shitty?

Have a fantastic day! I plan to!

Karen

Happy New Year! As you may recall, 13 months ago I made a decision to try something new. I decided NOT to make any new year’s resolutions, but rather, set some goals for myself for 2020 in a few areas of my life.

I set physical goals, professional goals and personal goals. I did not write these in pencil. I wrote them in pen. I was serious. But, I was also a bit nervous about the whole process.

After all, when you put something in writing, and share it with others, it is a commitment.

The first time I did this was when I decided to go vegan about eight years ago. I committed publicly (via this blog) that I would become vegan for 30 days to see what it was like, and how I felt. My reasoning was that I could do ANYTHING for 30 days. An interesting thing happened—by putting my goal in writing, and making the commitment to others, it was like I flipped a switch in my brain. All those obstacles and temptations seemed to disappear, and becoming vegan seemed achievable.

Well, the same thing happened for me in 2020. But the big difference for me this time was that I had a partner for the journey. We didn’t have the same exact goals, but we were both focused on our fitness and health. My partner (Jack Daly), happens to be one of the most goal-oriented, driven and determined people I’ve ever met. I first met Jack more than 20 years ago when he spoke to my CEO group. In the ensuing 20 years, I invited Jack to speak at my company multiple times about sales and sales management. I recall him talking about goal setting, tracking your goals and setting your sights high. Never in a million years did I think life would take a few turns and we would end up in a relationship and living together.

So, I am proud and excited to share what my goals were this past year and what I accomplished. I learned from Jack that one of the additional benefits of sharing this information is that it can motivate other people to step up their game.

*bold=goal achieved/exceeded

(If you think I’m crazy, then click [here] to see Jack’s 2020 goals and achievements)

So what were my top three learnings?

Be specific with your goals and figure out the best tracking metric with the outcome in mind (i.e. knowing I had to get up at 5 a.m. in the morning meant I had to figure out that I needed to be headed to bed by 9 p.m. in order to get more than 7.5 hours of sleep each night).
Importance of balance in the goals kept me balanced as a person (by having personal and family goals, along with fitness goals gave me a sense of a “win” in some areas, even if I was missing in others).
The tracking system made all the difference in the world. The discipline of writing everything down, and tallying each month, kept me moving forward. And it was a gentle reminder of what I set out to do.

So what are you going to do in 2021? Have you thought about writing down some specific, measurable goals for yourself? Have you chosen an accountability partner or two who you can share your wins or losses with?

As you can imagine, after one year of following this process, I can see how the specificity of what I did can help me get things done. Is it a surprise that I have added a few new items to my list for 2021?

I made a list of my closest friends, and have set goals for how often I want to touch base with them during the year.
I’ve added a few of the items off my bucket list to my goals for 2021.
I have pre-vaccination and post-vaccination goal categories (mostly for traveling and socializing).
Number of rounds of golf I plan to play and number of times a month I will do yoga.

I invite you to join me on this journey and feel free to share YOUR goals with me!

Cheers to a fantastic 2021!

Karen

So far I have received about 100 holiday cards from friends and family from every part of the country. My tradition has been to tape them on the walls at the entry to my house, and I have continued that tradition in my new house. It makes me smile to walk into the house and see the smiling faces of friends and their families. I leave them up through January which makes me feel connected to people far past the Christmas and New Year’s holidays.

I have been so happy to see that just a small percentage of the cards referenced the pandemic in a less than positive light, or had everyone in the photo with masks on.

For me, 2020 turned out to be a fantastic year. As I’ve heard many people say, there has been a “silver lining” from the pandemic.

My silver linings included selling my residence of 17 years and moving to a new house with the love of my life at the beginning of the year.

It was so sad that my mother Frieda passed away in January, but the silver lining was that we were able to have a Celebration of Life on February 22 with more than 1,000 friends and family in attendance, just a few days before the coronavirus caused large gatherings to be limited.

Because I was forced to work from home for most of the time since March, instead of spending 90 minutes a day commuting, I was able to use that time to start running and taking hikes in the hills of San Clemente and upping my fitness level. I would never have been able to do if I was commuting to work every day.

But, definitely, the highlight of the year happened this week.

And that was the birthday of my grandson.

Shortly after my mom’s memorial, my eldest daughter Alex and her husband Ben became pregnant and shared the exciting news with me in June (most couples are told to keep the news a secret until they pass the three-month mark). I’m not quite sure how Alex kept it from me, as we work together and I would see her daily via our Zoom business meetings. I did notice a kind of glow and a big smile on her face but was so preoccupied with the business challenges of COVID that frankly, I didn’t give it a second thought.

When Alex was born on October 17, 1989, it was the last day of our big annual produce convention (the Produce Marketing Association). I remember when I found out I was pregnant and they told me my due date. I was so naïve about things that I asked the doctor if he could change my due date as I planned to be at a convention that day. My doctor chuckled at me and said things don’t work that way.

October 17, 1989, was the day of the big San Francisco earthquake. For anyone who is a baseball fan, you will recall the earthquake that happened 30 minutes before Game 3 of the World Series was scheduled to start with the San Francisco Giants vs. the Oakland Athletics. I was in a hospital bed in Long Beach, Calif., and remember the earthquake well. I thought to myself, well this baby is going to shake up this world!

Both my parents were in the delivery room with me and my husband when Alexandra Nicole Caplan Jackson came into this world. And just a few days later, my mom, in her weekly produce “Hotsheet,” decided to describe the play-by-play of Alex’s birth, instead of promoting our latest produce products. It was a bit shocking to me and to many of our male customers when they received the purple newsletter in the mail the following week to read about the birth of a child. But it still brings a smile to my face when I think about the joy my mother felt to see her first grandchild born.

Now, that child is 31 years old, and as we entered the last week of the year 2020, our family anxiously awaited her turn to give birth. Although it has been 31 years since I gave birth to my first child, it seemed like just a short while ago. I was able to talk Alex through what to expect and she had a bit of that same naïveté that I did. When I awoke on Tuesday morning, there was a text from my son-in-law Ben that they had been at the hospital since 2:30 a.m. I got continual texts during the day from him keeping me updated on the contractions, the epidural, and of course when Alex was fully dilated.

I was on pins and needles all day, and frankly found myself quite distracted during my normal course of Zoom meetings and calls during the day. So, my partner Jack convinced me to go for a beach run in the afternoon to help distract me. Just as we were leaving the house, I received the most amazing news via text:

My grandson, Eli Fredaric Berkley was born at 2:53 p.m. weighing 6 pounds, 12 ounces, and was 20.5 inches long. Tears of joy streamed down my cheeks. At first, I thought that Ben had made a typo with the spelling of the middle name. Then he explained to me, in the Jewish tradition of taking the same first letter of a deceased family member and using it in the baby’s name, Eli’s middle name “Fredaric” was after my mother, Frieda.

One of my mother’s favorite sayings was “Technology is just amazing these days!” And during my beach walk, when I saw a FaceTime call coming from Ben, I stopped and answered, and was able to see Alex and Eli just a short while after he was born and to talk with them. Technology IS amazing these days!

Alex with her son Eli

So, in the next few days, as you reflect on 2020, and look forward to 2021, I hope you will look for the silver lining in your year. What connections did you make? What new habits did you form? What did you learn about yourself?

There are always silver linings. And that glass . . . well, it is more than half full.

Happy New Year!

Grandma Karen

Where I live in San Clemente, Calif., we face the same scenario as most everyone does. Part of our town is made up of old residential neighborhoods with longtime residents (and in our case, many surfers) and older buildings in need of repair on the “main drag.” Up the hill we have newer residential neighborhoods with more modern, larger homes and higher-income residents. We don’t have a lot of gas stations, but we have a fair number of supermarkets and have lots of wide streets and roadways which are perfect for runners and cyclists (and recently many e-bike riders).

We all frequent the various restaurants and small shops on our main street—Del Mar—and our part of the famed Pacific Coast Highway (called El Camino Real here in San Clemente). Nearby neighborhoods of Dana Point, Laguna Beach and San Juan Capistrano also have shops and restaurants, and many residents consider this one giant community. We all support and frequent businesses all around us.

It’s been heartbreaking to watch the ebb and flow of the dining scene. Pre-COVID, there was a thriving cadre of upscale restaurants, some with super creative chefs. We also have the typical fast-casual chains of Wahoo’s Fish Tacos, Chipotle and there are rumors of an In-N-Out Burger starting construction.

In April and May, we took long walks and drives down El Camino Real and saw virtually no one and no business on the street. Then the summer came, and our little beach town started bustling, many of the restaurants occupied the parking space in front of their buildings with semi-permanent tables and chairs, plus awnings. At least weekly, we did our best to support our community by going out to eat, always dining outdoors of course.

Now, with the most recent surge of COVID cases, some restaurants in our community are offering “Food to Go.” Unfortunately, there are restaurants nearby that have closed completely and permanently. It is so sad to see, as I know many of those restaurants were hanging on by a thread even before the pandemic.

I, like most people, am getting a little tired of cooking at home every night, so ordering in dinner is a welcome treat. Plus, it makes me feel like I am supporting the local restaurant business owners. I know many of my friends and family love to order in food as well, and some of them have chosen to use a delivery service, such as Postmates or DoorDash. You order online through the delivery service and pay them, and they pick your order up at the restaurant and deliver it to your home.

Let me tell you why I do not use a delivery service. It costs a restaurant between 25-30% of the total check to pay for the delivery service. For a restaurant owner to give up 25-30% of their revenue doesn’t make business sense. But many businesses are so desperate to have the income (to keep their employees employed), that they absorb that cost. Of course, using Postmates or DoorDash when you are not able to drive yourself to get food makes sense if you’re not feeling well, or if you have child care challenges, but that is not the case for me.

So, I have decided to make a conscious effort during the current lockdown to:

Order from a local restaurant at least two times a week (sometimes more). We alternate the restaurant, so we are spreading the wealth. We always order from restaurants in our own town.
We also go pick up the food ourselves, saving the restaurant the cost of paying a delivery service.
We tip generously, as we assume the business volume is down so the servers really need and appreciate the generous tips.

I hope that as you are sheltering in place in your home town that you consider supporting local restaurants in a similar manner. As they say “We are all in this together.” We don’t give a second thought to ordering online for our regular groceries or Christmas shopping and having it delivered to our home. But when it comes to perishable food, and supporting our local business owners, I think we should make a mindful decision to “Order In” and make a difference.

Happy Holidays and stay healthy!

Karen

I’m not a big fan of New Year’s resolutions. I’ve tried them before, and like most everyone, I slip back into my normal routine by the end of January and that is usually that.

But, last year about this time, I decided to try something new. As you may remember, the first week of January I wrote about my new idea of goal-setting plans Are New Years’ Resolutions Passé?

And I’d like to share some of my learnings and results this year as a way to potentially inspire you to try the same thing for 2021.

First of all, in my goal-setting routine for 2020, I set up categories (such as family, physical, personal, and travel). I broke the goals down to be as specific as possible, so I could measure them.

For example, in “physical,” I had goals for how many hours of sleep I wanted to average every night, my resting heart rate goal, how many times a week I would exercise, what type of exercise, and although I had a “weight loss” goal, it was a small part of my focus.

In the “personal” category, I listed how many books I planned to read/listen to, how many times I wanted to give blood, and how many handwritten notes I wanted to write during the year. These items are always important to me, but I was inconsistent in getting them done, so I figured establishing goals and then tracking them might make a difference.

In “family,” I had goals around how often I would spend time with both my daughters, my sister, my partner Jack (like dress-up dinners once a month).

And of course, I had vacation and travel goals … but those kind of got sidelined for the year due to COVID.

Then I bought a MONTHLY PLANNER for 2020 so I could record what I did each day. Now, I know what you are thinking, “Seriously, Karen, you are going to write down everything, every day? That sounds too tedious and hard!”

It was tedious, and it was hard to get into the habit. I cannot tell you how many times I realized that I had forgotten to write down how much sleep I got for an entire week, or what my workout was, but my goal was progress, not perfection. So, I learned to do hacks that would help me. I left my planner on the kitchen table so when I came into the kitchen each morning and each evening, I was reminded to update my calendar. Each weekend, my partner Jack and I would gently watch each other do our weekly totals on some of the categories, which inspired me to up my game many times. And then, on the first day of each month, we would do our totals for the previous month on one of the back pages of the planner for many of the categories.

I have to admit, the task of recording everything every day all year long was daunting. If I didn’t have such an aligned accountability partner, I know I would not have done as well. But having Jack, and then starting to see my own accomplishments and progress, was actually inspiring. And I think the results were amazing!

So, here is a little tease to whet your appetite (final results for 2020 will be tallied on January 1):

Goal: To complete a 5K and a 10K. Result: I completed two half-marathon (13.1 miles each)!
Goal: Do a cardio workout four times a week: Result: YTD, I have walked/run over 1,600 miles (that’s an average of more than 4.5 miles a day!)
Goal: Read/listen to more than 20 books. Result: YTD, I have listened to and completed 43 books!
Goal: Sleep an average of more than 7.5 hours a night. Result: YTD, I have averaged 7.78 hours of sleep a night!
Goal: Lose 14.4 pounds. Result: YTD, I have lost 4.4 pounds! But, I think I have a lot more muscle due to all my exercising. (BTW – Those were the hardest 4.4 pounds I’ve ever lost!)

What I’ve learned is writing down your goals, not having too many, sharing them with an accountability partner and tracking your progress—really works!

So, during the next two weeks, please don’t make any New Year’s resolutions. Instead, why don’t you go to Staples and purchase a 2021 MONTHLY PLANNING calendar. Make a list of a few goals. Start tracking them daily. Each month, recap your activity and progress. And perhaps add a few goals to your list for the next month.

One last thought: If we are friends on Facebook, then you probably notice that both Jack (aka John Daly) and I post a lot of our physical activities, and I post when I donate blood. Some people (who shall remain nameless) have commented that it seems a little self-absorbed to post so much about what we do. All I can say is I know for a fact that my determination and consistency have inspired others to step up their game and exercise more. And to start donating blood.

Last week, after I gave blood for the fourth time this year and posted the traditional photo of me in the donor chair with the IV and blood bag showing, I received two messages:

“People like you, taking the time to give blood truly saved my daughter’s life. Almost brings me to tears, thank you!” (From Christina in Ventura)

“You are a lifesaver! Thanks, Karen. If it weren’t for wonderful people like you and my amazing sister, I would not be here today.” (From Janie in Atlanta)

If I inspire others to accomplish things they thought were not possible, then I have done a great deed. I hope my sharing inspires you to take a big step to make 2021 your best year ever!

Karen

A few months ago, I wrote about my experience (The Difference One Person Can Make) visiting two separate wineries in Napa owned by the same family. We had a fantastic experience at one and a so-so experience at the other. It really highlighted for me how the experience I had visiting a place could be dramatically affected by the individuals you interact with.

So last weekend, as shelter-in-place orders were getting ready to go into force, we decided to visit one of the local restaurants here in San Clemente for our last night out before “lockdown.” A few weeks ago, we discovered a new outdoor restaurant, FIG@313, the chef is world class and his food—divine!

Outside Front View FIG@313 (Source: FIG@313 Facebook) Outside back patio by the firepit where we ate that night. (Source: Fig@313 Facebook Page)

So we made a reservation on OpenTable, bundled up for our 7:30 p.m. reservation (it was a chilly 58 degrees) and drove the few miles to the main drag, El Camino Real.

We were seated near the firepit, and appropriately physically distanced from the other parties in our area. All wait staff were masked and wore black plastic gloves. Our server came over to greet us—let’s call him Robert. Robert was nice enough, but when we asked him questions about the menu, his answers were curt, in fact, he did not actually answer our specific questions (like, can we get the mashed potatoes WITHOUT garlic in them?). It made me feel like he didn’t really know the ingredients and foods on the menu well. Also, it was especially frustrating during our meal that he wasn’t particularly attentive to us. For example, we had to request a few items from other servers as they came near us.

As we were finishing up our dinner, Jack and I were reminiscing about the service we had the first time we came there. That time, our server was Chris (that’s his real name), who was big and tall and completely boisterous. He was enthusiastic, genuine and passionate about the food and the restaurant. Chris even told us that he used to be a patron of the restaurant, and after COVID when he needed some extra money, he decided to work at FIG@313 as a server. His passion and appreciation for the food and the talents of the chef came through so clearly, that he actually talked us into ordering different menu items based on his recommendations. I found my mouth actually watering when he was describing the food.

Just then, Chris came to help clear our table. We said, “Hi Chris!” and he said right back to us, “Oh, so good to see you both back here! What wine did you bring? Did you enjoy your dinner?” Even if he was faking, we felt like he remembered us, took a genuine interest in us (he remembered that we brought our own wine) and actually brightened the evening for us.

I know that for the next few months at least, all of us will be either eating at home or ordering in food. No treks to our favorite restaurants. But we will be making phone calls (either for work or fun), working, doing Zoom meetings, going to the grocery store, etc. Have you ever thought about how your intonation during a personal interaction affects the other person?

During these times of heightened stress and tension, it really can make a positive difference to others if you put a smile on your face before starting a phone, Zoom or in-person conversation. Did you know that people can tell if you are smiling when you are on the phone? What about taking a moment to have a personal check-in with someone before a meeting or before starting a conversation? How are they doing? How are their kids, parents, spouse, etc.?

Frankly, I’ve been doing this with everyone I’ve been interacting with since COVID—even with the electrician who has been coming to my house for the last four months. Each time Richard comes over to fix something, I ask him something about himself. Last time he was here, I learned that he surfs almost every day (pretty amazing to me since he is 72 years old!), that he and his wife have fostered more than a dozen kids and that he lives in Escondido. We communicate via text and that personal touch I used not only made him smile, it seemed to personalize our working relationship and I now have found him to be super responsive, like he is doing work for a friend or family member, not just a regular customer.

Think about this: You go to the same grocery store every week. You probably recognize the checkers or the managers. Have you thought about asking them how they are? How is their family—do they have kids? Instead of being in a rush to get out of the store or through the line, think about your interaction and make it personal. You could actually bring joy to someone’s day.

My assistant, Tricia went to a large store this morning to pick up some gift cards for our employees and was delayed due to how busy the store was. Instead of getting frustrated and taking it out on the employees, she texted me, “It’s always in adventure!” and I’m sure she was accommodating, pleasant and full of smiles to the employee she was interacting with.

Make a positive difference the next time you interact with someone. At home. At work. With a stranger.

It is the season of gratitude and generosity—share the spirit of the season!

Karen

Like almost everyone, I end my day by checking my Instagram and Facebook feeds. It gives me a chance to see what my friends and family—near and far—are doing. In the absence of seeing people in person, I have resorted to spending a little extra time online, then following up with texts, emails and sometimes phone calls if a post inspires me to connect more deeply.

A few weeks ago, I saw a post from a longtime friend Betty Mower Potalivo. Betty retired two years ago after an amazing career as regional president and group managing director of Northern Trust Corporation here in California. I met Betty through my mother, Frieda, who did all her banking and personal investments at Northern Trust. Since Betty retired, we haven’t seen each other, but I occasionally see her posts on Facebook. Hint: When I find out someone is retiring or changing professions, I always make sure I am connected with them on Facebook, Instagram and LinkedIn. That way, at least I will know when something is happening in their life.

So three weeks ago, I saw this post on Facebook:

Hmm, I thought, those are some pretty cute golf clothes! And now that we have joined a golf club and I am playing once a week, golf clothes have moved up on my priority list. But, as you may’ve guessed—as with any sport-specific clothing—golf clothes can be expensive.

So, after seeing her post about www.skorzie.com , I decided to check it out. What I saw were cute clothes at fantastic prices. Plus, it was a woman-owned business, so I immediately purchased a few things. In case you’re wondering, I picked out seven pieces of clothing, paying a total of $300 and received them two days later! And thanks to the detailed sizing charts available by brand, the clothes all fit! I am hooked.

So I sent Betty a text thanking her for the recommendation and said I would love to be introduced to her sister, Eileen. I always love talking to women business owners to find out their inspiration and talk about their success.

Well, within a week the three of us were talking on a Zoom call.

The first thing I learned about Eileen was that she had a fantastic and successful career in the non-profit world. Most recently, she ran a local large chamber of commerce. Before that, she ran a hospital foundation, all while being a single mom of two. I also learned that she turned 60 in February and loved golf.

I mention her age (with her permission, by the way), because turning 60 seems to be a turning point in many peoples’ lives. I have heard multiple stories of professionals pivoting in their career at that age. Pre-60, they worked like a mad dog up the corporate ladder. Then at age 60, they changed to focus on what was in their heart. That may mean devoting yourself to a charity, being an advisor on non-profit boards, or spending more time with family. But while many people joke about mid-life crises at age 50, I have found that just as many people start following their passion at age 60.

Eileen told me that she and her sister Betty, plus their other siblings, were raised as a welfare family in Huntington Beach, Calif., and always struggled to have food on their table. As she called it, she became a “sensitive shopper.” That was her way of saying she was cost conscious and frugal. She knew how hard it was to make ends meet.

So, when she stepped away from running the chamber of commerce at age 60, she decided she wanted to combine her passions: helping others less fortunate, saving money and golf. She told me she leveraged her connections at the chamber of commerce and was able to meet the head of sales for a sports clothing manufacturer. She pitched her concept of being an alternative, online distribution channel for golf fashion for women. Through that single personal connection, she met with additional manufacturers who were thrilled to sell her their entire unsold seasonal inventory.

So, she rented a small warehouse, bought a camera and hired a couple of people and some freelancers to develop a website, post photos, and handle marketing via digital ads on IG. She does all the inventory purchasing herself and has financed the entire business herself through her savings and retirement funds. She confided in me that she didn’t always get the best advice. Some things worked. Some things didn’t. It has been a lot of trial and error.

But at the end of six months (she launched her business in mid-May 2020), she is on track to do more than $250,000 in sales in the first year and is cash-flow positive.

In addition to selling clothes she purchases directly from manufacturers, she was inspired by www.thredup.com and takes gently used golf clothing on consignment. But perhaps the most heartwarming component of her business model is the part that really hits home for her.

Eileen invests in causes that help stop bullying and body shaming for girls. Because she is based in Escondido, Calif., (near San Diego), she was introduce to LPGA golfer Haley Moore. You can read about Haley [Here] and [More Here] but Haley was bullied for much of her life due to her weight and body type.

As you are reading this article, Haley is playing in an LPGA Tournament in Texas. She is an incredibly talented golfer and has a foundation to which Eileen contributes some of her profits.

So, next time you are looking at Facebook or IG, or thinking about what the next chapter in your career might be, don’t be afraid to dream big. Dream differently. Think about your passions. Think about your struggles in your earlier life and how you got through. Reading an article online or in a magazine and feel a tug at your heart? Spend a little time dreaming about what a difference you could make in someone’s life.

And if you’re in the market for women’s golf clothes, I hope you will check out www.skorzie.com and support my new friend Eileen. If you’re watching sports this weekend, how about taking a break from typical college and regular sports and check out who’s playing in the LPGA tournament. It might provide a different kind of inspiration for you and your daughters, sisters and female friends.

That next chapter of your life will be here before you know it. And, most likely, you can make a difference—an even bigger difference—by listening to your heart.

Karen

With the election top of mind, last Saturday morning we were looking for things to do with our out-of-town house guest. Visiting all 13 presidential libraries is something I added to my bucket list last year. But ever since COVID hit, both Southern California’s Presidential Libraries (Richard Nixon and Ronald Reagan) have been closed. But we took a chance by doing a Google search to see if anything had changed.

And—lo and behold—although the entire permanent collection was not open, the Richard Nixon Presidential Library had a special collection that was open for visitors along with free reign of their beautiful gardens.

I have attended several events at The Richard Nixon Presidential Library and Museum over the years, including my daughter Sophia’s senior prom, but I have never toured the actual museum. Because it was a rainy day, and due to COVID, there were actually no other visitors while were there. It was amazing to have the time to read every document hanging on the walls and to not feel rushed.

Richard Milhous Nixon was born and raised in a small farmhouse in Yorba Linda, California. Apparently when deciding the site for his presidential library and museum, a significant parcel of land was purchased surrounding that childhood home, and that is where the museum is located. It was amazing to see the humble house he grew up in, in contrast to the huge buildings, exhibits and the presidential helicopter in close proximity, which are all part of the presidential library and museum compound.

The original childhood home of President Nixon

The small exhibit that was open highlighted the special relationships between presidents and their predecessors. Barack Obama was inspired by John F. Kennedy, Nixon was fascinated with Franklin Delano Roosevelt (FDR) and obviously there was a special relationship between George H.W. Bush and George W. Bush. There were photos of how Bill Clinton and George H.W. Bush became close friends after they left office, working together to raising money for humanitarian aid after a ravaging tsunami in Indonesia and Hurricane Katrina in New Orleans. The theme was really about the special brotherhood (at least for now it is all men). In fact, hanging on the wall in the exhibit is the cover of a book entitled, “The Presidents Club, Inside the World’s Most Exclusive Fraternity.” I have put that book on my reading list.

As you enter the museum, there is a larger-than-life quote made by President Bill Clinton at the funeral of President Nixon (who is best known as the only president who resigned and left office due to implications from the Watergate scandal):

“May the day of judging President Nixon on anything less than his entire life and career come to a close.”

So, what was it about President Nixon and the more than four years he served as President that was so remarkable? Here are a few highlights:

Achieved peaceful segregation of schools in seven Southern states.
Welcomed home the Apollo XI astronauts after their historic 1969 landing on the Moon.
Established the Environmental Protection Agency (EPA) in 1970.
Signed Title IX in 1972 prohibiting gender bias at colleges and universities receiving Federal Aid (changing the face of sports forever)
Issued the Shanghai Communique in 1972, which has guided U.S.-China relations ever since.
Attended the Moscow Summit in 1972, becoming the first President to make an official state visit to the Soviet Union.
Signed the Paris Peace Accords in 1973, ending the war in Vietnam.

Especially during the last few months of watching the presidential election campaigns, many of us may ask ourselves “What motivates someone to run for public office when every part of your personal life will be scrutinized, and you will never again have privacy?” As I walked through the exhibit, I could see the passion and love of county of so many incredible leaders: Kennedy, Lyndon B. Johnson, Dwight D. Eisenhower, FDR, Reagan, Bush (#41), Bush (#43), Clinton, and Obama. Each of them left their special mark on our nation and the planet.

As an adult, the only things I remember distinctly about President Nixon was that he was impeached due to the Watergate scandal, that he debated Kennedy during the first televised presidential debate, and his “salute” as he boarded Air Force One after he resigned. I never knew anything about what he did for women, in sports and in business, and I vaguely remember that he opened up trade with China.

Photos from the permanent exhibit highlighting the impact of Title IX

I am so glad we spent a couple of hours touring his presidential library and museum. It was just a tease for me. I hope in 2021 that the full museum will open up so I can learn more and now, more than ever, I want to be sure I find a way to visit the other 12 presidential libraries. There is so much to be learned from history.

Jack, me and our friend Rick in front of the museum.

And, in this digital time, when we are in the habit of “googling” everything or attending all meetings by Zoom … it is even more important than ever to see history, “in person.”

Karen

All of us do it. We do it in our own way. We do it either alone or with friends and family. Sometimes we try to ignore it.

I’m talking about celebrating a birthday—that one day out of the year that is ours alone.

Now, I realize that birthdays may not be a big deal to some people—especially in 2020, the year of the pandemic and if birthdays are usually not a big deal and you are happy to let it go by each year unnoticed, then it would not be a big deal for you this year either way.

But for me, birthdays have always been a big deal. My special day.

It started when I was a young girl and my dad would kid me, pretending he didn’t know when my birthday was. I still remember every year on October 1, I’d comment to my dad—“Do you know what happens this month?” He would always say, “No. Is something happening this month?”

And, being as gullible as I was, I always fell for it.

My mom always made me feel special on my birthday. She called me every year on my birthday at 4:15 a.m. No matter what time zone I was in, since I was born at 4:15 a.m., she figured it was fair play for her to wake me up. Every year. Last year, for some reason, when I went to bed, and put my phone on my nightstand, I didn’t realize it was on silent mode. So when I woke up in the morning, I kind of shrugged it off that mom had forgotten. But, never fear! There was a voicemail for me from mom! Who would have known that it would be the last year she would be calling me (since she passed away three months later)?

This year was a milestone birthday for me, so before the pandemic my partner Jack and I started planning to have a party at our house to celebrate my birthday (last week). We even started re-landscaping our backyard in July to make it extra special for the soiree.

Well, you know how this story ended. Not only are we still in the middle of our landscaping project, but there was no party. No lunches and dinners with friends during the month, which is another birthday tradition for me. If you’re not a super extrovert like me, this may not be a big deal, but I thrive on in-person interactions with people. It gives me energy.

Frankly, I had a pretty hard time last week. It was all my “head trash” (thank you Jack for putting a name on it!). I began to focus on the reality that there are so many people who have been locked in their homes since March, in constant fear of contracting COVID-19. I needed to remind myself that I have been fortunate enough to go into my office three or four days a week, and to get to spend time with my teammates (with masks and physical distance, of course). Multiple times a week I am interacting with friends, business professionals and others via Zoom.

In fact, last Friday on my actual birthday, I attended a virtual global session with three of the most powerful and influential women in the world: Mary Barra, Chairman and CEO of General Motors; Virginia (Ginni) Rometty, Executive Chairman of IBM; and Fatma Samoura, Secretary General of FIFA (Federation Internationale de Football Association)! It was quite a session.

Have you ever had a pity party for yourself? Especially since the coronavirus has taken over our lives, I think there are many of us who have regular pity parties. I was guilty as charged. So, I did what I needed to do to stop that pity party—I took matters into my own hands, within the limitations of masking and social distancing.

I let my partner Jack know how important my birthday was to me, without any specifics. Fortunately, he is very creative and amongst the cards and gifts he gave me, I giggled when I opened up a package with bottles of Benadryl and Advil (he said I would need them more at my age). I set up a birthday dinner with my family, putting no pressure on them to attend, as I know to not judge those who have health considerations during the pandemic.

I contacted two of my dearest friends, and they each happily offered to meet us for breakfast and lunch at an outdoor restaurant. It was so good to see them—in person!

And I did one of the coolest things ever—I played the recorded voicemail message that my mom had left me last year on my birthday. It was fate that I had my phone on silent, as I now have a lifetime memory.

As I think back to last week and what I had originally hoped to have happen to celebrate my milestone birthday, and then reflect on how the week went, I realized that everything worked out perfectly. It was different for sure. I found new ways to celebrate (such as hiking up to the top of the HOLLYWOOD sign in Los Angeles, which allowed me to check something off my bucket list).

It was QUALITY, not quantity. Perhaps I learned that the new normal, starting in 2020, is about quality of life. Have you thought about how your life is going to be different now? Maybe it’s not so bad that we have had to slow down our hectic pace. We’re not traveling as much, not eating as much, perhaps sleeping more and taking better self-care.

I think this trip around the sun was awesome and I look forward to what the near year holds!

Karen

Sixteen years ago, I met Sarah Frey (pictured above). She was the 2004 recipient of the annual scholarship that my sister Jackie and I created in 2001 to honor our mother while she was alive. The Frieda Rapoport Caplan Family Business Scholarship annually funds up to four members of family owned businesses in the produce industry to attend The Washington Conference (formerly the Washington Public Policy Conference). The conference, held each year in September, was created by the United Fresh Produce Association to bring members of our industry to Washington, D.C., to talk with our elected officials (Senators and members of Congress) about the priorities of the agriculture industry.

Members of the industry apply for the scholarship each year and an independent selection committee chooses the winners. Jackie and I attend the conference and always spend time interacting and encouraging the scholarship winners. Over the years, more than 60 members of family owned produce businesses have joined us in Washington D.C.! In the fourth year, a young woman from the Midwest was awarded the scholarship and she stood out like no other. Her name is Sarah Frey (pronounced fry).

In 2004, when I first met Sarah in Washington, frankly, she seemed very timid and too quiet to be a business owner. She was 28. I was told that she was one of the largest pumpkin and watermelon growers in America and, as a woman-owned business, she was on the radar of many of the biggest retailers in America. My friends at Walmart told me that they really enjoyed doing business with Sarah and her company. And she had hired as one of her company managers, a longtime friend of mine, Paul Fleming.

Paul confided that she was amazing and she really was a force to be reckoned with. Not only did she spend time that week on the hill talking with our elected officials about the shortage of farm labor, water rights and hours of service regulations for truckers—but later I realized I could have learned a thing or two FROM her! Although quiet in her demeanor, she was compelling, knowledgeable and frankly, fearless.

Over the years, I have enjoyed getting to know Sarah better. Her niece, Hilary, and my eldest daughter Alex were both selected for United’s year-long Leadership Program in 2014. So Sarah and I met up at their class graduation. When my mother passed away in January, Sarah arranged to attend the celebration of life we held in February, flying all the way out to California to attend.

When our industry was soliciting nominations for its annual Women in Produce Award this past June, I couldn’t wait to nominate Sarah for this recognition. The Women in Produce Award was created over 25 years ago to highlight and give recognition to those women in our industry who have an inspiring untold story. Little did I know when I was putting together the nomination packet that Sarah’s story was about to be told to the public.

Sarah had just completed her autobiography The Growing Season and it was published in August by Penguin/Random House. I had the incredible opportunity to listen to it last week on Audible. Talk about a compelling and inspiring story!

Sarah is the youngest of eight children and moved out on her own when she was 15. To support herself, she bought melons from local farmers and developed a route of delivering those melons in her pickup truck direct to grocery stores. She was so successful that she ended up buying her family farm and house out of bankruptcy! When I originally heard that she was the owner of Frey Farms and her four older brothers worked for her, I was in disbelief! But, after reading the book, I now know how it all happened.

Sarah is a survivor. She never takes no for an answer. She always finds a way to get things done. Here is a perfect example: while she was in bed recovering from the birth of her eldest son, she was interviewed by telephone by a Harvard Business School professor for a case study on how she negotiated with Walmart!

If you ever want to be inspired, especially in times like now, when many of us live in fear of being caught without a mask and hand sanitizer, I highly recommend you either read or listen to The Growing Season: How I Built a New Life—and Saved an American Farm.

Or perhaps, you will have tuned into Good Morning America this week and saw Sarah being interviewed. Or, in a few years, you may see an ABC Television/Cable series based on the book! Just last week Sarah texted me the announcement of the deal she signed with ABC.

When I think back to that first meeting with Sarah in 2004 and fast forward to seeing her accept the Women in Produce Award earlier this year, I am in awe of how determined Sarah has always been her entire life and how much I can learn from her. Just like my mother, success came to Sarah because she never saw obstacles. How many of us put up our own obstacles? How many of us have self-talk that is negative or not productive? Next time we think we have hit a bump in the road (or a pothole), or a door has started to shut on us, let’s be a little more like Sarah. Where there is a will, there is definitely a way!

Karen

Besides COVID (and our new work-from-home, self-isolating, temperature-taking and no-handshaking lifestyle) and climate change (exemplified by the raging fires in Northern California, fires in Southern California, flooding in Iowa, high winds and overcast skies/poor air quality), I’m guessing we all have the same thing at the top of our minds—the election.

Every time an election rolls around (whether it’s in a Presidential election year like this year, or every two years when we elect congressional representatives, state officials or local community leaders), I oftentimes get a sense of apathy from many people. Apathy sounds like: “My vote doesn’t matter. I don’t know which candidate is better. I don’t understand what the (California) propositions really mean. I’m not registered. I’ve never voted before.”

Well, this year I am channeling my inner “Frieda Caplan”—my mom. When we held her celebration of life in February, we shared her favorite quote from the commencement speech she gave in 2014 at Cal Poly-San Luis Obispo when she was awarded an Honorary PhD. On that Saturday morning, she spoke to thousands of newly graduated students who were embarking on the next step in their life journey. Here was her advice:

“Never badmouth others. Always listen to the whole story.

Be a voice in your community. Be politically active, VOTE, speak up.”

This week, millions of Americans will be receiving their ballots at home. Many of us have signed up for or are eligible to vote by mail, making it incredibly easy to cast your vote in the comfort of your home. But, as you know, there has been a lot of controversy about the U.S. Postal Service and its ability to handle the anticipated surge in mail volume and to safely ensure the delivery of ballots to secure ballot-counting locations.

I am personally thrilled that there is so much publicity about the ease of voting and the ability for most everyone to vote by mail. So many of our citizens take our right to vote for granted. In fact, it has only been 100 years since female citizens in the United States have had the right to vote! [That one is personally shocking to me!]

Did you know that Chile, Ecuador, Australia and more than 15 other countries require compulsory voting (if you don’t vote, you can be fined and, in fact, in Bolivia you can be denied your salary if you cannot show proof of voting within three months after the election!)?

So, if you are one of those people who doesn’t think your vote matters, or you feel you don’t have time to go to the polls, or can’t make a decision on who or what to vote for … you have one month to do your research! Time to get on it!

Here in California, the land of “propositions” (where citizens and groups can petition to put issues on the ballot for a direct vote of citizens, therefore bypassing the regular legislative process), voting for or against an item can be tremendously confusing. I was just introduced to www.CalMatters.Org — a nonpartisan, non political organization that explains the real meaning of items on the ballot. If you live in California, check it out: The CalMatters 2020 Elections Guide.

In closing, I want to say this. We live in a democracy where we have the ability and the responsibility to be active citizens. We may not all agree with each other as to who should be elected to represent us. But, as citizens, and responsible members of humanity, we should take advantage of the right we have to vote and have our voice heard.

If you own a company, encourage your employees to vote; remind them that it is their hard-earned right. Give them time off to vote if they didn’t vote by mail.

If you’re not an owner, then as you talk with your friends, family and coworkers—without politicizing the conversation—encourage them to vote. If they want more information, help them find it. In California, our Secretary of State sends out an Official Voter Information Guide. Read it!

Wear red, white and blue every day until the election to remind people that being patriotic is being an active citizen. It does not indicate whether you are Republican or Democrat. It says you care.

As my mother said, “Be a voice in your community. Be politically active. VOTE. Silence is not an option.”

Karen

Thanks to my 45-minute commute each way to work daily, I am reading one book a week. By “reading,” I mean I am listening to them on Audible. I am a huge fan of audio books. At this pace, I am constantly looking for recommendations of books to read.

Thanks to AI (Artificial Intelligence), Audible takes care of that for me, if I let it. So last week, after I finished No Rules Rules, by Reed Hastings (CEO and co-founder of Netflix), Audible suggested I might like to read the Dale Carnegie classic How to Win Friends & Influence People.

Even though I had read the book many years ago—and have taken several of the Dale Carnegie training courses (which, by the way, I still find helpful and relevant)—I thought, “It never hurts to reread a classic.”

Part of my inspiration for rereading this book was a speaker I heard probably 20 years ago. Boaz Rauchwerger continues to be a popular speaker in business circles. I use Boaz’ “Five Key Questions” when I meet someone for the first time, and have done so for years:

Boaz Rauchwerger’s Five Key Questions

I am just curious, where are you originally from? Boaz said that everybody has a story and you want to know it to understand them.
What brought you here? …
Do you have a family? …
What do you do? …
What did you want to be when you were growing up?

Boaz always started his presentation by saying he reads, or rather rereads, the Dale Carnegie classic How to Win Friends & Influence People once a year! He shared that he always gets a new insight regarding people relations. So, I figured if Boaz reads it once a year, I could reread it for the second time.

Because I am listening to this book during my two-way daily commute, I have a unique opportunity to apply the principles twice every day, once when I get to work and then again when I get home at night.

The Carnegie book is divided into four sections. This infographic outlines it for you: How to Win Friends & Influence People Summary:

Fundamental Techniques in Handling People
Six Ways to Make People Like You
How to Win People To Your Way of Thinking
Be a Leader: How to Change People

There are so many lessons to be learned through following the practices in this book. Several stood out to me that I have tried out in the last week. I’ve had incredible success in using them authentically.

Even when I am calling a service rep (like my painter) or a doctor’s office, I have started by paying a compliment to the person or company as my first sentence. For example, when I called the painter a few days ago, I started by saying, “First of all, I need to tell you that you guys did a FANTASTIC job hanging wallpaper in our bathroom last month. Your guy did such an amazing job that we could not find the seams in the wallpaper!” The rest of our conversation was so much more friendly and cooperative than my previous call, and the owner offered to come out to give us a quote on a painting job (where previously they had told me, due to COVID, there would be no in-person quotes). They expected us to do the measurements and email them.
I was reminded in the book that “a person’s name is to that person the sweetest and most important sound in any language.” So, when I went to the doctor’s office this morning, I complimented the receptionist, saying how beautiful her name was (is it Paola). Not only did she share with me the story about how her mother chose her first name, but she made sure I got in to see the doctor without waiting (pulling a few strings for me).
Another principle is to “Try honestly to see things from the other person’s point of view.” So, I have started to make a diligent effort when I have been talking with someone who has an opinion different than mine to purposefully acknowledge THEIR point of view first, saying something like, “I know that you have told me how difficult it is dealing with this situation, so I want to say ‘thank you.’ This kind of situation is never easy, and before we discuss it further I wanted to acknowledge you and your effort.” This approach has worked especially well multiple times in the past few weeks. Previously I would dive right into the subject, and I found every person reacted negatively or defensively.

Probably the easiest and most effective of Dale Carnegie’s principles is just one word: Smile. It’s so easy to do, but I for one can say that it is easy to forget. I learned long ago that if you smile at someone it is the other person’s natural instinct to smile back. Physically, it is impossible to NOT smile back. I’ve tried it many times, whether at work, at home, or out in public. A person always smiles back at me. And then, the rest is easy.

So, during these stressful times when tensions are high and nothing seems to go the way you are used to, it might be a good refresher to pull out that dusty copy of Dale Carnegie’s book and read a chapter a day, or even a chapter a week. The chapters are short but the message is timeless.

After all, the book was first published in 1936 (thus all the references to Presidents Taft, Theodore Roosevelt and Wilson) and the paper copy I just pulled off my bookshelf was the 102^nd printing in December 1975!

Timeless wisdom.

Karen

This past weekend we took a trip to wine country in northern California. Spending a few days in Napa Valley and staying in a B&B, visiting wineries and taking long hike/walks each morning was a nice break from the back-to-back Zoom meetings of my regular work week.

First, let me answer the obvious questions and concerns.

Yes, we wore masks everywhere we went, including at the airport, on the one-hour flight, while renting the car, at the B&B and at the wineries and restaurants.
Some wineries provided hand-washing stations or hand sanitizer when we arrived.
All wine tastings were by appointment only, which allowed venues to properly limit and space out the number of people.
All wine tastings and meals were outdoors—thank goodness for the temperate weather we have in California!

Even with these potential obstacles, we had a really lovely time and enjoyed the wines and wineries.

What was surprising, however, was that even with all the protocols for COVID, the human factor still played a significant role in our experience.

One of our favorite wineries is Silver Oak—considered a premiere producer of Cabernet Sauvignon. The owner David Duncan is a serial entrepreneur and has expanded his portfolio by adding other wine labels, including Twomey—known for its Pinot Noir. On this trip, we booked in-person wine tastings at both Twomey in St. Helena and at the mothership, Silver Oak, on Oakville Cross Road near Napa. A few years ago, the wine tasting room at Silver Oak experienced a fire, so the wine tasting room and winery were rebuilt and they are state of the art and quite beautiful.

So on Thursday we drove up to Twomey, and were immediately seated at our appointment time at an outdoor table. Our wine guide Max (wearing a mask) was filled with enthusiasm. He asked us questions about where we were from, our experience and likes of wine varietals and seemed genuinely excited about sharing his wine expertise. His eyes showed how excited he was to tell us the story of the vineyards and every few minutes he would lean in (from 10 feet away) and ask, “Would you like to try a different vintage of Pinot Noir? I have something in mind for you—and I’ll be right back.”

Our table set for our wine tasting at Twomey, with our guide masked Max.

We just finished our wine tasting with Max at Twomey.

He would disappear into the winery and would reappear with another new bottle that was not part of the “standard tasting” and excitedly told us about the grapes, the winemaker, etc. Even with all the limitations with spacing, timing, etc., Max made us feel as if we were his only clients and there was no rush. The standard tasting was four different wines—and I’m guessing we ended up tasting seven or eight wines. After 45 minutes or so, he gently apologized and said he needed to assist another table, but assured us there was no rush, to enjoy ourselves and that he would be back shortly. We leisurely enjoyed the wine, the view, took photos of the gorgeous grounds and spent another 30 minutes or so relaxing. As we were leaving, Max assisted us with a purchase, and we wished each other well (he had shared with us that he was recently engaged to be married and where he was attending college, so we felt a genuine connection to him)

As we left, we both commented that the experience was amazing, but we were sure that it was nothing compared to what we would experience the next day at Silver Oak Winery in Napa.

We arrived at Silver Oak on time the next day and had to wait just a few moments before our wine guide David appeared for our 1 p.m. tasting. The first thing he said to us as we were seated was, “I have another tasting at 2 p.m.” (Wow, not the best opening line for a guest!)

For the next 45 minutes or so, we tasted the four wines that were poured for us. When we would ask a question to engage David and learn more about the winery, he would say, “I will get to that later on in my presentation.” We were immediately discouraged from asking any questions for fear of going off script. I think he brought us an additional wine to taste, but frankly, we were so disconnected by his approach and his lack of genuineness that we found ourselves hurrying to leave before his next 2 p.m. appointment. It’s hard to remember anything about his presentation.

As we left the Silver Oak grounds, we looked at each other in amazement. Here we were at potentially the most well-known and respected winemaker in the entire Napa Valley—whose Cabernet Sauvignon wines are world class and top-rated—and we felt underwhelmed and disappointed.

The wines were still awesome, but the experience we had with our “sales rep” was less than.

Isn’t it interesting that the way we were treated affected our experience? Think about it. The same owner—who is passionate about his craft—is behind both wineries, they have virtually the same geography, offer the same wine glasses and in some cases the same wine. But the person who we interacted with was the difference.

Have you ever had that experience? Same store, different sales reps, polar opposite experience? One person turned you on and engaged you and made you feel like you were the only person in the place; the other one was simply going through the motions just to get through their day.

If you are a business owner or leader, you may want to see if your vision is alive and well with everyone on your team. Most especially, gauge how they interact with clients or new employees: do they show the same care and enthusiasm that you do? Or are they just going through the motions?

It’s amazing the difference one person can make, isn’t it?

Karen

P.S. Our purchase at Twomey was four figures, but we passed on making a purchase at Silver Oak. Think about it—the power a single person can make to both the top line and the bottom line of a company!

Let me start by saying I don’t watch (much) television. It’s probably because I’ve always gotten up early (5:00 a.m.) to go to work, and when I get home in the late afternoon, I usually spend my time exercising, doing a little catch up work and then hit the sack, so I can get my 8 hours of sleep. That—combined with the 24-hour news cycle of negative and bad news that makes me crazy—is probably why the only things I will occasionally watch on weekends are the Food Network (think “Chopped”) or HGTV (to watch others remodel their homes).

That was until my niece Heather sent me a text four weeks ago. It said, “Do you have Amazon Prime Video? I’m watching something called ‘World’s Toughest Race—The Eco Challenge.’ They advertise it as a race that eats Ironmen for lunch. Jack might be interested in watching.”

I didn’t think anything of it, until my partner Jack brought up the show a couple of weeks later (fun fact: Jack has completed 15 full Ironman challenges!). He wanted to watch it one night (it’s a 10-show series). I agreed because, after all, my niece had recommended it.

I want to add that I have never had any interest in watching the “Survivor” series, and I am not an outdoorsy person. But after watching the first night of “The Eco Challenge,” I was shocked to find myself completely hooked and potentially obsessed with it.

A quick synopsis: the challenge consisted of 66 teams of four people (each team had members of both sexes). Their goal was an 11-day “dash” over 400 miles of the rugged mountains, rivers and jungles of Fiji. Participants came from 30 countries and the 10-part series followed eight teams of endurance athletes 24 hours a day (they slept very little) from the beginning to the very end of this dangerous trek.

Cycling, hiking in the jungle, rowing, riding the rapids, swimming in a 55-degree river for hours, stand-up paddle boarding—they did it all!

Each night, I found myself rushing through dinner so we could turn on “The Eco Challenge” to watch the latest installment of this incredible and exhilarating human experience. Not only did the 700-person camera crew follow the teams into the jungle, they interviewed them and got a lens into their personal life, pre-Eco.

Of all the teams that were profiled, one from Spain really caught my eye. Team Summit was made up of a group who have a broad experience in expedition races. They were friends and had a deep personal connection before they came together for “The Eco Challenge.” The team captain was Emma Roca from Barcelona and there was something about her that caught my eye.

(Emma and the three other members of TEAM SUMMIT, plus one additional team member as the support person who kept them fed, clothed and rested at each checkpoint.)

So after watching the series, I googled her and found her website Emma Roca. Not only was she a world-class elite athlete—she has a PhD in biomedical engineering! She currently is a firefighter and she and her husband have three young children.

To quote her website (thank you google for translating from Catalan):

“Between putting out fires, being a mother, competing all over the world and enjoying as much as I can, I was able to finish my PhD in Biomedical Engineering and co-found several companies related to health and sports. I combine being a mother, a scientist, an entrepreneur, a professional firefighter and an ultra-background athlete squaring a minute-by-minute agenda. They call me a multi-tasking woman, but I keep the secret with the great team I have behind me!”

As I read further on her website, I learned that 18 months ago she was diagnosed with a vulvar carcinoma (cancer of the vulva). It usually appears in women over the age of 70. Emma has taken on the fight by having surgery and is now having radiation treatments. She is incredibly optimistic and inspiring.

So, I looked her up on LinkedIn, found her Messenger account and sent her a message. Then I crossed my fingers. I asked myself, would she write back to a total stranger from California, who was obsessed with her leadership and accomplishments from “The Eco Challenge”?

She wrote back the next day!

“Thanks Karen! Just doing treatment and very motivated to compete again!” And she sent me this photo.

All I can say is Wow! Even if you are like me, and not really into outdoorsy or sports challenge shows, I suggest you check out “The Eco Challenge.” It immediately fired me up and inspired me to step up my fitness game—big time.

After watching these teams compete 24 hours a day for up to 11 days straight, I found myself really driven to push myself a little harder. Instead of 30 minutes on the Peloton®, I did 45 minutes. Instead of a three-mile walk at the beach, I did five miles at 6 a.m. on a Sunday. I find myself visualizing my goal and being even more determined to get there.

How about you? Looking for a little motivation? “ECO” “ECO” “ECO” is my new mantra!

Karen

When I was a sophomore in college, I attended Mills College in Oakland, California. It was only for one year, but that one year really changed my life. It’s a women’s college, so I didn’t have the distractions of guys in my classes. But that’s not what changed my life. What changed my life was their swimming pool.

Right in the middle of campus, next to the bookstore and coffee shop was a pool, with lap lanes. It wasn’t a large pool, but something about it attracted me. So I bought a black Speedo bathing suit and started swimming laps every day. The pool couldn’t have been too long (maybe 15 or 20 yards), because I could hold my breath the entire length of the pool. Between swimming daily laps, and cutting my food consumption down to 1,000 calories a day, I lost about 25 pounds my last semester and gained a ton of self-esteem.

Even when I came to work on the L.A. produce market with my mom that summer, I had someone come up to me to ask me where my sister was? The one who had been working there the summer before? Well, that “sister” was me! I looked transformed.

And that was the last time I swam laps. Until about three months ago.

Thanks to COVID, I have had to be creative about my exercise routine. We quit our gym membership, bought a Peloton® to do indoor cycling, have been doing running and taking 5–10 mile fast walks. Because I can’t go to Orangetheory® for my cardio, I have been using the Concept2® Rower my partner Jack had at home (as a Triathlete/Ironman, of course he has a rower at home). And three months ago, the community pools in our development opened up.

I told Jack that I loved to swim, but it had been years. Literally more than 40 years since I swam laps. But I pulled out my swimming suit and we headed to the pool one day. Man, was it long. Way longer than I recall that pool at Mills College was. I was told it was 25 yards. So four lengths (two laps) was 100 yards.

Right away, in my head, I’m thinking that I am going to get side cramps. And that my sore right shoulder is going to make it difficult to swim more than a lap or two before I have to rest. So, I swam two lengths of the pool. Not too bad. I didn’t push it and I noticed that my shoulder liked me being in the water and I did not get one single side cramp.

We were swimming in adjacent lanes, and every few days Jack would suggest a new “twist” on my swimming. He would shoot a video so I could see my awkward strokes—I was able to fix that right away. He would time my swim, when I did four lengths (two laps) of the pool without stopping. I was so slow, especially compared to him. When I asked how I could learn to swim faster, he suggested using the rower to build upper body and shoulder strength since that is what helped him. So, I started rowing 15 minutes daily.

Finally, Jack dropped the big challenge on me last week. “Let’s swim 20 lengths of the pool straight through,” he says. I’m like, “ARE YOU KIDDING ME?? 20 lengths? I can only do four.” I told him how much my arms would hurt and that my shoulders couldn’t take it.

That’s when Jack said, swimming 20 lengths is not hard because of your arms. It’s your breathing. And I’ve been watching you, timing you, etc. for two months. I think you’re ready. He’s been a good coach, and I trust him. (After all, he got me to do two half-marathons in the last four months!)

So, I adjusted my goggles, took a deep breath, and started swimming. I counted my strokes: one, two, three, four (then took a breath). Back and forth. Staying calm. He was right—my arms didn’t hurt at all. And because I was concentrating on counting my strokes and pacing my breathing, I didn’t find myself out of breath.

At the end of 20 lengths of the pool, I stopped, pulled my head out of the water and started talking to Jack about how I could just keep swimming. Wow—I cannot believe that came out of my mouth!

Have you ever told yourself that you couldn’t do something? Whether it’s related to the pandemic, to your personal or business life—it doesn’t matter. I told myself I could only swim two lengths of the pool. Then I could only swim four. And then one day, I received a new challenge and I easily swam 20 lengths of the pool.

I think that it is the same way with life. Perhaps you thought you could never work from home; but then the pandemic happened. Or you had to always have breakfast—then you learned about intermittent fasting and found yourself not eating until noon each day.

I think all of us have self-limiting beliefs or self-imposed limitations. Consider what yours are. What stories do you tell yourself? What things do you not try because that is what you’ve always done, or what you’ve never done?

Next time you are telling yourself what you cannot do, I want you to think: two lengths of the pool . . . four lengths of the pool . . . 20 lengths of the pool . . . the goals are limitless!

Karen

Since mid-March, most of the office workers at Frieda’s have been working from home, either partially or full time. Because we are in the food business, we have continued to follow Good Manufacturing Practices, which involve certain sanitizing procedures. We distributed masks to our employees, put decals on the floor to indicate a distance of six feet, and in some instances relocated work stations. And we significantly increased the frequency of our sanitizing procedures and did a lot of training of all employees.

But I could never wrap my head around the need to take temperatures. I mean, in all the research I had done, the only information you get from doing that is you have someone’s temp. If they are asymptomatic, a person could have COVID but not have an elevated temperature. So we did not institute this in our facility.

I even talked honestly and off the record with some HR professionals, and they admitted that taking a person’s temperature before they enter a building or workplace was more of a “PR” move.

As I went to various doctor appointments over the past three months and to some restaurants, I noticed many businesses were taking my temperature before I could enter. Doctors’ offices always did a health survey, but because I always answered “no” to each question, it didn’t seem too disruptive.

As a company, we had been working on our written COVID Preparedness Plan, which included having formalized procedures for quarantining employees should any of them be exposed to or test positive for COVID. We already had the practices in place, but felt to have a written plan that would be distributed to all employees would be a smart thing to do. It would create more peace of mind for all.

And then one of our temporary workers in the warehouse, who had been home sick for a week, informed us that they tested positive for COVID. Like most employers, we had already experienced an employee being exposed to someone who tested positive and we had them self-isolate for 14 days. But to have someone who worked in our facility test positive put our team into high gear.

Within a couple of hours, we had done tracing, had identified any employees who had close contact with this person and sent them home to self-isolate. Our COVID team, including myself, was out and about in our facility, making sure to personally inform people of what we were doing and what actions we wanted them to take.

Taking the extra time to have our leadership team on the floor to answer any questions was a smart move. I think it made all our team members feel supported and informed.

When we were recapping afterwards (with masks on and standing at least six feet apart), I asked for feedback. Our HR person told me that a few employees had asked why we weren’t taking peoples’ temperatures before entering the building. We discussed it at that time, and what I learned was that the taking of temperatures would make all the employees feel “better.” So, even though it might not inform us if someone was positive for COVID, it would make the employees feel more comfortable coming to work.

So, within a day we had portable thermometers and were taking temps and having paper health surveys completed at the door. We had most of our office employees revert to working from home again. And this week, we installed a Contactless Temperature Screening Kiosk with facial recognition at the entrances to our building. Some of our employees find it kind of fun “scanning in!” Next week our health surveys will able to be completed on our payroll app.

Keeping our facility clean and safe is a given. But giving our team members peace of mind by responding to their suggestions was even more important to me.

Each time I walk our facility, I make eye contact with each person and thank them. They are my heroes. They are all heroes. We are all in this together.

Karen

About 6 weeks ago, my eldest daughter Alex (pictured above at age 8 months with Grandma Frieda, doing her first produce taste-test) texted me asking if she and her husband Ben could come down on Friday to have dinner with us at our home in San Clemente (70 miles from their house). It was out of the ordinary and off schedule for her to set up one of our family dinners (it is usually me setting them up once a month), but of course I said yes, absolutely!

I then had a dream that Alex and Ben were coming to tell us they were pregnant. When I asked Alex if that was so … she blew me off in complete Alex style, ”Mom, you need to calm down about that sh*t. We just want to have dinner with you guys.” And I bought it.

So, when they arrived for dinner that Friday, after they settled in, Alex said, “Mom, when I was cleaning out the garage, I realized when I moved out of grandmas’ house years ago, I accidently grabbed a box of her jewelry by mistake. I brought it back for you.” And then she handed me this black box.

I opened it up and it was a metal button, like a giant campaign button. I kind of rolled my eyes and said, “This is the jewelry that you were concerned about returning? Really?” Alex said, “Did you read it?”

Well, the minute I read the button, I blurted out: “Are you pregnant?” She smiled, I started crying and we hugged. Of course, later I learned that my son-in-law Ben was taping the whole scene, so we replayed it over and over that evening.

What was extra special about that button was it was the very button I gave MY mom—Frieda—when I announced I was expecting Alex back in 1989. What an incredible coincidence that Alex found it! It brought back memories of telling my parents that I was pregnant and their wonder through the whole experience of pregnancy through childbirth (they were both there in the delivery room when Alex was born!).

It turned out that Alex and Ben had dreamed up a special and unique way to surprise each of their immediate family members with their news. For my daughter Sophia, they visited her at work and presented her a sweatshirt that said, “Cool Aunt.” I so appreciate how Alex and Ben took the time to surprise me with their news and how they took great care to do the same for the other grandparents-to-be and their siblings.

As Alex and I talked about 2020 and all the happenings, she said to me, “Mom, we started the year with grandma passing away in January. The next weekend, Ben and I got our first dog, and named it Kiwi (in memory of grandma bringing the kiwifruit to America). Then came the pandemic. And now on Christmas Eve, our first son is due to arrive. What an unbelievable year 2020 will be!”

It is especially bittersweet for me, as Monday, August 10 is my mom’s birthday. She would have been 97. My sister Jackie and I and our immediate family of nieces, nephews, spouses and kids are gathering at mom’s house for a light snack and chocolate cupcakes (my mom’s favorite), with masks, separate tables and proper physical distancing. I’m sure we will reminisce by looking through old photos, telling funny “Grandma Frieda” stories and eating a few of her favorite foods (beets, olives, honey mustard and avocados).

And we will talk about the circle of life. 2020 is definitely an example of how the miracle of the circle of life works.

I remember my mom hearing from all her friends how much she would love being a grandparent. It was perplexing to her, as she admittedly didn’t have great motherly instincts. But from the moment Alex (and then Sophia) was born, she reveled with joy and pride how much fun it was to watch her offspring. She was there for every Grandparent Day at elementary school, every graduation and every life cycle event.

She softened over the years, but maintained her sharpness, wit and complete interest in others, up until a few days before she passed.

She would be so excited that I will now be able to experience the joy of becoming a grandparent.

So Happy Birthday, Mom! We miss you and will be celebrating you this weekend!

Karen

(Me, baby Alex at 6 months, and my mom, Frieda, celebrating Earth Day 1990 at our office)

Several decades ago, my mother Frieda went to a spa in Ojai, Calif. It was called “The Oaks at Ojai” and was founded and owned by Sheila Cluff. If you have ever heard of Ojai, you know it is a small, sleepy town nestled into the inland hills just east of Ventura. It’s hot and dry and somewhat remote. (It’s also the home of Pixie Mandarins!)

I’m thinking it was in 1986, the month after I was named President of Frieda’s, when my mother took her first two-week vacation away from the business. She went to The Oaks at Ojai to rest, relax and lose a few pounds. She left me in charge of the business for the first time. I have so many vivid memories of those two weeks.

When my mom came back from her trip, she told me that each night at the spa, there were guest speakers talking about everything from books to exercise to proper eating. One of the speakers who she found most fascinating was a dermatologist. Her name was Dr. Cheryl Effron and she had an office in Anaheim Hills, not too far from my mom’s home. My mom was so impressed with Dr. Effron that she started seeing her regularly to have her skin checked. Dr. Effron and my mom developed an amazing and long friendship, and when mom came back to the Frieda’s office after each visit, she would start talking about Dr. Effron’s daughter, Jessica Koslow.

According to my mom, Jessica was apparently a child prodigy (isn’t every doctor’s only child a prodigy?) and a world-class ice skater. My mom would get the update on Jessica’s ice skating career after each appointment. And, typical of my mom, they all became friends—Dr. Effron, Jessica and my mom.

Fifteen years ago, after Dr. Effron found a malignant melanoma on the back of my mom’s leg (and arranged for her to have surgery to remove it), my mom announced to my sister Jackie and me that we needed to start going to see Dr. Effron every six months, since we could be at risk for skin cancer, too. And being the obedient daughters we were, we both started seeing Dr. Effron every six months … and still do to this day.

Fast forward to about 10 years ago, when our company forager Mary was walking the Santa Monica Farmers Market. Mary noticed this dark, curly haired woman was kind of following her from stand to stand, tasting the various peaches, plums, and other fresh fruits. Finally, Mary turned to the girl and introduced herself, “Hi, I’m Mary from Frieda’s. So, who are you?” And the girl answered, “You work for Frieda’s? My mom is Frieda’s dermatologist!” As it turns out, Jessica Koslow, the ice skater, had pivoted in her career to become a jam maker.

She started a jam-making company that she named SQIRL, and she would purchase fresh, in-season fruit weekly to process her jams and create delicious flavors like Raspberry Rhubarb and Blood Orange and Hibiscus Marmalade.

When I learned this, I called my mom and she said, “Of course, Jessica makes the best and tastiest jams in the world. Literally, Karen, she has become so famous, people order her jams from all over the country!” Hey mom, you never told me that Jessica stopped ice skating.

When I would go see Dr. Effron for my twice-yearly appointments, I always asked about Jessica. I hadn’t met her, but after she and Mary met up at the farmer’s market, it piqued my interest. One day when I was in the Silver Lake area of Los Angeles—where SQIRL LA is located (Jessica expanded from being just a jam company to a restaurant that served breakfast, brunch and lunch)—I stopped in there to smell the heavenly pastries they served and view the chalkboard where they had their menu and the teeny tiny seating area. SQIRL seemed bigger than life when I read about it, and to visit it in person was like making a trek to a mecca.

Sometimes Jessica would send jars of jam to my mom. She knew that my mom had a bit of a sweet tooth, so her jam was a perfect gift. Honestly, the jam was soooo delicious, so addictive, that I ate almost a whole jar once while I was visiting my mom’s house (that was one of the few times my mom got mad at me, and I had to call and order replacement jars for her).

My daughter Alex proclaimed to me last week: “Jessica Koslow and SQIRL put Silver Lake on the map. Before SQIRL, it was a sleepy, unknown neighborhood. Jessica made it a destination!”

So, last week, I did something that made me very happy … I ordered two copies of Jessica’s second cookbook, The Sqirl (Jelly, Fruit Butter, and Others) Book. It was published and first available for orders on July 22.

I received an autographed copy of Jessica’s first book, Everything I Want to Eat: Sqirl and the New California Cooking when it came out in October 2016. Her mother Dr. Effron hand-delivered it to me during one of my regular appointments! Jessica’s first book was named Eater L.A.’s 2016 Cookbook of the Year.

I am salivating as I look at the photos in the cookbook and am thinking when citrus season starts up again that I may try my hand at the Kumquat–Mandarinquat–Limequats Marmalade recipe on page 238.

No wonder The New York Times called her “The Genius of Jam.” I think I will always call her Dr. Effron’s daughter, the ice skater.

Karen

Have you ever gotten up quickly and felt a little dizzy or turned over in bed and had the room start spinning? Well, that’s exactly what has been happening to me intermittently since March. It’s a pretty helpless feeling when it comes on suddenly. And it is especially confusing and frustrating when it disappears as quickly as it comes on.

But about two weeks ago, the day after I hiked the Grand Canyon, I had a terrible bout of vertigo. It included nausea, a complete feeling of being unbalanced and it was all around yucky. I had a hard time standing up from a seated position and had to avoid any quick head or neck movements.

I couldn’t even drive to work the next day, so I attended our morning meeting via Zoom. One of my coworkers said, “You need to go to Dizziland.”

“Ha! Ha!” I thought. But then I remembered that this coworker Leslie had had a weeklong bout of vertigo along with migraines last year and had found a specialist who treated and cured her. So, after our Zoom meeting, I called her. She told me that there are only two places in the United States that have an extensive treatment center to treat vertigo and one happens to be in Newport Beach—about 20 miles from our offices (the other one is in Florida). She told me to check out their website www.dizziland.com.

I immediately went on the website and filled out the inquiry form and within a day I received a phone call. After I described my symptoms, it was as if the universe was working on my behalf, as she said, “Wow—we have an opening at 8 a.m. on Tuesday. Are you available?” “Of course I am!” was my answer. She told me I would come in for a consultation with the doctor and would then go through a battery of tests for four hours.

I was advised to wear loose clothing and to not eat a lot, as during the testing, some patients have gotten nauseous. So, I opted for no food in the morning (thank goodness).

When I walked in to meet the doctor, I got a smile on my face. His name is Dr. Howard Mango. Mango! So immediately I told him that I sell mangoes and we started talking about the produce business. What a small world. When he was a student at the University of Southern California, he used to work at the 32^nd Street Market near downtown LA—in the produce department! Talk about establishing immediate rapport!

I asked him how he got into the audiology field—he told me that his real passion was acting, but he also loved the sciences. He said that John Ritter (famed actor) was in one of his early acting classes at USC. Well, Dr. Mango realized that John was really good … so thought maybe he should pursue a career in science!

Back to the assessment of my vertigo. I spent more than four solid hours being tested. Two separate times, my complete torso was strapped into a chair (looks like an astronaut’s seat on a space capsule) and was turned in every possible direction.

One of the tests involved being spun at what felt like a really high speed, in the dark, and having to focus on various shapes and bright spots. Another test involved lying on a table with blackout goggles on, then they put a long, thin balloon in each of my ears—one with warm water and one filled with cold water.I stood on a platform, and below my feet the floor would jerk or move, and they were recording how I reacted and whether I lost my balance. I never felt terrible or anxious during the four hours of testing, but it was comforting that the three separate technicians who guided me through the morning (actually medical students doing their training), were kind and nurturing. I’m guessing that my vertigo challenges were mild compared to some of the people who came for treatment. It made me laugh as during one test (when I was strapped into a chair in the dark and spinning very fast), the technician was asking me to list things. It’s a great distraction technique. She asked me to name all kinds of animals. I said, “Hey, I sell fruits and veggies for a living—can I just name them for you?!” The whole idea was to distract me from getting anxious about being spun around.

So this week, I got my diagnosis. During the testing, I figured out that the issue was probably on my left side and, in fact, Dr. Mango told me that it is my left ear that is “sick.” The diagnosis is called “Vestibular Neuritis and Labyrinthitis”—a disorder resulting from a viral infection that inflames the inner ear. This has caused Benign Paroxysmal Positional Vertigo (sounds awful, but really means: not life-threatening, sudden and caused by certain head positions). It was fascinating to learn about how the eyes, the ears and the brain really do work together to keep us balanced.

The treatment is Advanced Vestibular Treatment™ which is solely directed by doctors of audiology. The Dizziland Institute and one other facility in St. Louis are the only practices in the country using it. This treatment is performed at the doctors’ office twice a week and at home (on my computer) on all other days of the week, to retrain my eyes, brain and ears. The doctor also confirmed that part of the treatment is to take at least 2000 mg of Vitamin D3 a day and to eat a diet of healthy (non-junk) foods. I am relieved that he was able to quickly pinpoint the cause of my vertigo, and in six weeks of physical therapy I should be well on my way to being vertigo-free!

If you know someone who has experienced vertigo, and they are willing to see an audiologist/specialist who specializes in vertigo treatment, please pass this website along to them: www.dizziland.com. My insurance covered everything except the copay.

It will be a life-changer!

Karen

Me, in the treatment chair this week.

I have always heard about the Grand Canyon and that seeing photos of it, versus being there in person, is no comparison. I recall that it was one of the Original Seven Wonders of the World.

After a lot of juggling of calendars, and working around COVID-19 travel restrictions, we were able to squeeze in my first trip to see the Grand Canyon about two weeks ago.

This visit seemed like a bit of a tease, as we flew into Las Vegas on a Friday morning, drove four hours to the Canyon, and only hiked for a few hours (Friday night and again early Saturday), before heading back to Las Vegas the next morning.

We entered the South entrance of Grand Canyon National Park, and I came to a strikingly swift realization—that you could be within 20 yards of the rim of the canyon and not even know it was there! It’s true! We pulled into the parking lot near the entrance and as we got out of the car, I had no idea how close we were to the rim. We literally walked down a short asphalt path, with small plantings of trees and bushes interspersed between the pathways, and all of a sudden—there it was. It was breathtaking! And huge.

Actually, it IS huge, but it doesn’t necessarily appear that way when you are standing on the rim. The Grand Canyon itself is a mile (1.6 km) deep and up to 18 miles (29 km) wide. But if you drive the circumference, from the South Rim entrance to the North Rim entrance—it takes more than five hours! So, to drive completely around it would take more than 10 hours.

We decided to hike down at Bright Angel Trailhead late Friday afternoon. As you might imagine, it was pretty hot in the Arizona sun. The trail didn’t look that difficult to me, especially since I saw at least a dozen people who were also hiking down that path.

But, when we met the first hikers who were coming UP the trail, after a day of hiking and saw the look on their faces, I knew this was a serious hike. In fact, we asked two women hikers if they would take our photo for us … and they refused. They were so exhausted from their three-mile return hike, they were afraid if they stopped moving, that they would not be able to start walking again to return to the rim. That’s serious!

We ended up hiking one mile down Bright Angel and turned around and hiked a mile back to the entrance. With all the switchbacks on the trail that we had to take during that mile, I realized it didn’t even take us very far down the canyon.

That’s when I finally understood why to hike “Rim2Rim” (that’s the official name of the hike from the top of the South Rim down across the canyon up to the North Rim, or the reverse course) takes at least 12 hours. And because it is treacherous to hike in the dark, many groups choose to do the Rim2Rim in June or July, because that is when the days are the longest and you have the most sunlight. Needless to say, that is also when it is the hottest. Today the temperature at the Grand Canyon is over 90 degrees (which means it is probably over 110 degrees on the floor of the canyon, where there is no breeze). So, that two-mile hike on Friday evening was just fine for my first venture.

We got up at 6:00 a.m. the next morning to do a four-mile walk around the rim, as there is a lot of historical information and an educational pathway along the South Rim which demonstrates the 2-billion-year timeline of Grand Canyon geology.

With all this being said, I highly encourage you to visit the Grand Canyon. Know that you do not need to be an elite athlete to experience the amazing vistas, the history, and the beauty of Northern Arizona. You can take it at your own pace.

But, let me tell you what I learned during my time at the Grand Canyon.

During the morning walk around a small part of the rim, on the path there were signs that said “take one large step—about 3 feet—and you will have traveled a Million Years.”

Let me repeat that: 3 feet = 1 million years.

That means, this freaky year we are in right now—2020—won’t even show up in the Grand Canyon.

And that bad day you had? It’s not even a blip on the geological timeline.

It really put things in perspective for me. I find that when I am having a rough day, a rough week, or even a rough few months, that all I have to say to myself is “GC”—Grand Canyon. It puts it into perspective.

And that’s why I recommend you make time to go visit the Grand Canyon. Go with at least one person who you can share the experience with. And allow some time for you to walk slowly, to meditate, to journal if you want. I was not surprised that we came across a robed monk seated cross-legged on a rock meditating in the early morning hours.

It is truly a heavenly place.

Karen

I don’t know about you and your company, but at Frieda’s we invited all our employees back into the office a couple of weeks ago. In early March, like the rest of America, we thought it was best to have employees work from home. As an essential business (the food business, supplying grocery stores), our employees in the warehouse still came in every day. Thankfully our business continued to be very busy, packing and receiving all of our specialty and exotic produce, like Dragon Fruit and Jackfruit. Of course, we made sure to establish many new protocols to ensure workers’ health and safety—spacing workers six feet apart, lots of hand sanitizer, no large meetings and we set up satellite break rooms so everyone had plenty of space when they took their lunch breaks.

During the last three months, our office team rotated into the office—one person per department each day. This ensured the essential duties that involve phone calls and paperwork were done in a timely fashion. Everyone else worked from home. Thankfully, we had purchased laptops for all employees a few years ago as part of our Emergency Plan, so the staff were all equipped to make that move with less than 24 hours’ notice. Thank goodness for cell phones and Zoom.

Now that most everyone is back at work, the challenge became: how do we promote some fun, healthy activities plus get the team vibe back? When I received a LinkedIn comment from one of my produce industry friends suggesting we organize a team for a fitness walk/run/5K/30-mile online event sponsored by the Center For Growing Talent by the Produce Marketing Association—I jumped right on it.

What a great idea! Any company in the produce industry could put together a team, and each team member could choose the distance they wanted to do: 1 mile, 5K, or 30 miles in 30 days. Since I am newly into running, fast walking and half-marathons (daily fitness)—and being the competitive person that I am—I decided to invite everyone at our company to join me. I started with a personal email to all employees and then I asked our HR team to help me register employees who wanted to sign up. My goal was to get 25 employees to participate.

Man, was I surprised at how it turned out! At first the sign-ups were slow. But when we announced that if you signed up and completed your commitment, you would receive a $50 gift card … that seemed to get everyone’s attention!

This weekend marks the final day to record times and distances. We ended up having 48 of our employees sign up, and this Monday we had a spirit day and took some fun photos! (There is an award, of course, for the team who showed the most spirit and SWAG.) One group of employees from the warehouse even decided to get together on the weekend and hike 15-20 miles up Mount Wilson (the tallest peak in So Cal)!
Have you ever organized or participated in a team run with your coworkers? It’s a great way to promote teamwork and camaraderie—and break up the monotony of work. I remember years ago I worked with a woman who wanted to have a company softball league. She told me that when you play sports with your coworkers, you come back to the office more likely to work harder for and get along better with your coworkers—because you’re literally on the same team!

There are many silver linings to the coronavirus/shelter-at-home orders if we just look for them. For us, it seems like everyone was ready to get moving, exercise and spend time with their coworkers!

Karen

Last weekend I took my first plane flights since COVID-19 pretty much grounded me from my normal business travel schedule. Actually, as I look back on my calendar, I have not been on a plane this year!

So, this trip took me from Orange County through Dallas/Fort Worth International Airport (DFW) to change planes.

I had seen photos that friends had posted on Facebook of eerily empty airports and planes, so I was somewhat prepared. I carried my own mask (plus a back-up), along with sanitizing wipes. And, of course, I packed my own snacks.

The Orange County airport was incredibly empty. There are three separate terminals, and only the central terminal was open for security; flights and food outlets were quite limited.

That all changed when we boarded our flight, as I would estimate the flight was half to two-thirds full. Interestingly, there was little chatting or the usual banter between passengers. After take-off, the flight attendants were rarely seen. Of course, I realized that this was because currently there is no food service on domestic flights.

Once we landed, exited the flight at DFW, and rode the Skylink to another terminal, I had a chance to chat with a few flight attendants. They shared with me that the passenger load on flights had just started to increase in the last week or two. They had been flying the last three months, but anticipated there would be furloughs after the summer.

Since we had an extra hour on the ground, we made our way to a restaurant and witnessed firsthand physical distancing practices in food establishments. The young host was calm as he let us know our seating options, and we decided to sit at the bar, as we saw two chairs available there. Tables in the restaurant were spaced out farther than usual, and there was no silverware or anything on the tables.

We sat and had an adult beverage and did our people-watching. Of course, we were wearing our masks at all times until our drinks came.

And that’s when I witnessed incredible, gentle kindness.

A 60-something gentleman traveling alone was getting up from the bar and could not find his mask. He was visibly flustered, as it was obvious he would be getting on a flight soon, and a mask would be required. He checked with the bartender, “Did you accidently throw away my mask?” The bartender looked; none of us could find his mask.

Then a 20-something young man came to sit at the bar and could tell the older gentleman was a bit frantic. The 20-something deposited his backpack on a bar chair and said, “What kind of mask do you want?” As he opened his backpack, he pulled out a large sleeve of masks in every style imaginable! There must have been 15 or 20 masks in that clear plastic bag. The 60-something-year-old man was so grateful and picked out the kind of mask he wanted and said thank you. No handshaking, of course. Just big smiles.

I was so struck by the simple kind gesture of that 20-something man. Travel is stressful enough with trying to make connections and getting a quick bite to eat between flights, but in these times of COVID-19 and physical distancing, many people are walking on eggshells. With everyone wearing masks, even if you smile at someone, it is doubtful that they will feel the impact of a smiling face, since our mouths are covered.

But a simple act of selfless kindness goes a long way. And I am hoping that we see more of this in the months to come.

And, about getting on your first airplane after months of not traveling … it’s not so hard. Just prepare (with masks, wipes, snacks and reading). Be kind to your fellow passengers. I do recommend taking a nice hot, soapy shower once you arrive at your destination. You will sleep better knowing that any errant germs are gone!

Karen

It’s graduation time around the country and many of us are not able to witness that enormous rite of passage—walking across the stage in front of a celebratory crowd to shake hands and receive a diploma in front of family and friends. Whether it’s graduation from middle school, high school or college, it is heartbreaking to some people and families to miss out on the traditional life cycle event.

In contrast, we’ve all seen the “drive by” birthday or special celebrations, where friends and families cruise by the home of the birthday celebrant with posters, honking horns and lots of waves and blowing kisses.

But a college graduation is a really big deal, especially when someone goes back to school to get an advanced degree.

So you can imagine my surprise and delight when I received an email a few weeks ago from my industry friend, Kevin Coupe who is a well-known thought leader in the supermarket and food business at the Morning News Beat. (I had been a guest speaker at a summertime Marketing Business Class he teaches at Portland State University in Oregon a few years ago, and after class we went to dinner. His wife Laura and daughter Allison joined us—we had a fabulous conversation—and Allison and I felt an instant connection. She and I have stayed in touch the last few years via email.)

“So, on Saturday, Allison Joan is supposed to graduate with her masters in special education. But, of course, because of the pandemic, she won’t have a graduation ceremony (which she was looking forward to because she has a 4.0 GPA), so we’re just going to celebrate at home.

So, I have a favor to ask. Would you record a 2-3 minute video commencement address for her that I could play when we’re having dinner on Saturday night? Just words of wisdom … or whatever you want to tell her. I guess what I am hoping for is some advice for going forward … the stuff that I could tell her that she’d never pay attention to because I’m her father. The stuff you’ve learned in your life and career that you’d want someone to tell your daughters.

Thanks… I appreciate it.”

The first thing that I noticed were the words “commencement address.” My heart skipped a beat, as giving a college commencement address has been on my bucket list for almost 10 years! But this wasn’t the type of commencement address I had in mind when I added it to my list. Of course, I replied immediately and told Kevin “yes.” And then I started thinking: what kind of “stuff” had I learned in my life and career that I would want to share with a recent grad?

I made a few notes, then on a Friday morning, while I was working from my home office, I recorded it on my iPhone. As my mom would always say, “Technology is just amazing!” I had watched Kevin’s recordings for many months, and my partner Jack had just done a “happy birthday” message for one of his nieces. I watched how they looked into the camera, how they both made their recordings seem folksy and human, and then, I just did it. No makeup, no special lighting, I was just real and I spoke from my heart.

When I was done, I watched it and then emailed it to Kevin. I heard he received it, but that was it.

Until yesterday’s mail arrived. A handwritten card from Allison:

“Dear Karen,

Words cannot express how touched I was at your contribution to my commencement video. Your words brought tears to my eyes, and it was amazing how appropriate they were—far more than any regular commencement speech could’ve been. I feel like you laid out the challenges and opportunities I will have really well—I’ve spent today making a list of the things I want to accomplish and how to make the days ahead of me my best ones—cause they will be! And I loved the reminder that it’s okay to ask for help and to use my connections to help with success.

The greatest thing is I get to keep the video on my laptop so in moments when I need a little inspiration or encouragement, I’ll be able to turn to you again (and I hope I can reach out in person as well … ). I hope to have dinner again soon! Thank you again!

Sincerely, Allison

P.S. Your shirt is the coolest shirt ever!”

Well, talk about making a difference in someone’s life! Check, check, check! I got the chills.

Perhaps there is a lesson here. Maybe one of the gifts of the pandemic is that instead of “being a number” at a graduation, or having to listen to someone you don’t know or have a connection to, there is now an opportunity to make your graduation more personal and full of meaning. Is there a special person in your life who is celebrating a momentous occasion? Don’t be afraid to record a personal message.

A couple of hints that gave me peace of mind in doing this:

In advance, outline the three or four points you want to make (that way you are not rambling or running out of things to say).
Look directly at the camera on your mobile phone—it makes the recipient feel as if you are talking directly to them.
Make it personal. Come up with one or two specific memories that you can mention. This will make the recipient feel like this is a personal message to them.
It’s okay to be a little scrappy when you are doing it—it makes you seem more approachable and is easier than getting all dressed up and being worried about the background, tripping over a word, etc.
Do at least one run-through. I recommend you record it, so you can play it back and see the angle of the camera, how your hair looks and to make sure you’re not doing any weird motions.

If you’d like to see my “First Commencement Address”— here it is!

Onward and upward!

Karen

Yes, you read that correctly. This past Sunday I completed my first half-marathon—13.1 miles.

That may not seem like a big deal … but, please note: I am not a runner. The last time I ran a 5K or a 10K was more than 15 years ago. You might wonder what motivated me to complete a half-marathon, so here goes.

Let me start with my goals for the year. Many of you know that I started a new process back in December of setting some annual goals for myself (read about it here). Some were weekly (number of workouts), some were monthly (number of books I read or dinners with my family) or annual (number of trips or vacations). Many of those goals were centered around fitness, such as how many times a week I would exercise. Plus, I wrote in my annual goals that I would complete a 10K this year. But frankly, I thought that accomplishment was far-fetched, since I couldn’t even run a full mile continuously.

Then enter the COVID-19 pandemic. No more visits to the gym I had just joined. No more weekend cardio-intense fitness classes at Orangetheory Fitness. No more twice-weekly weight training sessions with my strength coach. I was very concerned about how I would maintain the fitness level I had been working on. Obviously, without the disciplined fitness routine I had, my biggest concern was: would I gain weight?

So, my partner Jack and I started taking evening walks at the end of our work days. What began as a “sauntering walk” around the neighborhood evolved into two-hour mini-hikes. With our phones and tracking devices, we found ourselves making sure we completed at least 3 miles each night, and oftentimes those evening walks were 5-6 miles long. Sometimes the route was flat; other times we did a battery of hills and mountain trails. Our favorites were when we could walk the beach trail and see the sunset. But, thanks to the virus, those beach trails were closed, and we had to stay in the hills near our house.

One of the things that made these evening walks so enjoyable was that I had a partner. And I noticed we weren’t the only people in our neighborhood going for long regular walks. Over time, especially since mid-March, we started to see more and more groups of people walking together. Sometimes families (adults and children together), sometimes couples, and sometimes groups of same-sex friends. And over time, we saw more smiles—people got friendlier!

We started to see groups of runners or people riding bicycles together—it actually was quite a phenomenon! Since our goal was to walk every night, we started to meet our neighbors. We noticed who had dogs. One day, as we were leaving the house, a couple walked past and stopped to announce, “Hello – we think we are your next door neighbors!” I don’t know about you, but because I was usually at work from early morning until early evening, I never got a chance to meet or see my neighbors. Now that I am often working from home, and walking around the neighborhood, we are starting to meet them. What a nice side benefit of walking the neighborhood!

So, back to the half-marathon. Early last week, Jack said to me, “I think we should do a half-marathon this weekend.” I’m like … “What????” (Full disclosure, Jack has run 95 marathons, completed 15 Ironman Triathlons and is very into running.)

He said, “I have been watching you ‘build your base’ of walking strength, and you are easily completing one or two 5-mile walks a day. A half-marathon is only 13.1 miles, and we can walk it!” Wow—I never thought about completing a marathon by walking it, but that definitely sounded more doable than running it. He said, “The Marines are hosting a ‘virtual half-marathon’ this weekend and we can register online. And that means, once we complete it and give proof of our time and mileage (by uploading a photo of his Garmin Watch), you will get a really cool medal and T-shirt to commemorate your first half- marathon!”

That sounded so exciting to me—to have a medal, a completion certificate and a cool T-shirt—and so I said, “I’m in.” Jack was able to answer all my questions about best time of day to do it (early morning, when it is cool), proper nutrition (pack snacks with salt and plan where you can purchase water along your route) and what to wear (proper socks, running shoes, sunscreen, etc.)

I have to admit that I didn’t tell anyone I was doing this in advance, and I was a bit skeptical that I would be able to complete a 13.1-mile walk in a reasonable time. But, I did it! And it wasn’t as hard as you might have expected it would be.

Here’s how you can set yourself up for similar success, especially if you want to step outside your fitness comfort zone:

Set a fitness goal for yourself. It’s okay if it seems a bit outlandish or far-reaching.
Get a partner, an accountability partner, who shares your goal. It sure makes it easier, especially on those days you don’t feel like training.
Set yourself up for success by having a regular training schedule. Record it manually (it reinforces your commitment by having to write it down).
Tell everyone you can what you plan to do. It’s another way to hold yourself accountable, by making a public announcement. I chose to announce it afterwards, but feel free to enlist your supporters early!
Celebrate when you achieve your goal. You never know, by sharing your personal success or achievement, you might actually inspire others!

And that’s why I decided to share the story of completing my first half-marathon. I am pretty sure there are more half-marathons in my future. Now that I know that I can walk it, or mix in both jogging with walking, my next half-marathon goal will be beating my first completion time.

How about you? In this time of the pandemic, and virtual cocktail parties, why not sign up for a virtual 5K, 10K, or half-marathon? It’s a great way to step up your game!

#RunWithTheMarines

Karen

During the last eight weeks, there has been a single topic on our minds: when will the sheltering in place and disruption of the COVID-19 virus be over?

Well, since no one has the answer to this question right now, I want to share a different perspective.

No matter what is going on in your mind or in your life, you should ask yourself this question: Are my best years behind me or are my best years ahead of me?

The reality is … we all get to choose! Frankly, I believe strongly that it is all a mindset (consider this great book: Mindset, The New Psychology of Success by Carol S. Dweck, Ph.D.).

Sure, you could lament about the “good old days” and “the way it used to be,” or you could change your perspective. If you buy into the idea that the best days in your life are truly ahead of you—and you believe in that—it can actually make it exciting to get up each day!

First of all, you would say to yourself: How can I make that happen? How can I ensure that the best days of my life are ahead of me? What would cause that to happen? And what stands in the way? Well, really nothing stands in the way.

It’s all about how do you want to live your life. How do you guarantee that your life is full of joy and excitement? What things would have to happen to make your future the best part of your life?

Start by making a list. Make a list of all the things that you want to do, or you want to happen. Places you want to go, people to see, hobbies to learn, and so on. List things that would make your future years the best ones.

Some might refer to this as a “bucket list.” It doesn’t have to be outrageous, unless there are some outrageous things you want to do. For example, bungee jumping is not on my list, but visiting the Grand Canyon is. Taking a vacation several times a year is on my list and so is having family dinners with my daughters at least once a month.

Think about it, to have a sense of accomplishment and self-satisfaction, it’s good to create that road map with stops along the way. If this sounds too organized and goal-oriented for you, you might find it interesting to learn that more people spend time planning their annual one-week vacation than they do planning their life. Why not think bigger than only planning an annual vacation?

It’s long term thinking vs. short term thinking.

Back to the COVID-19 sheltering-in-place time we are in, it is easy to feel like the sky is falling. But let’s put this into perspective based on our own history.

It was over 30 years ago that HIV and AIDS were discovered and famed basketball player Magic Johnson was diagnosed with HIV in 1991. He immediately retired from professional sports. When diagnosed, he could easily have thought his best days were behind him. Today, in 2020, Magic Johnson is better known for his incredible success as a Los Angeles-based entrepreneur and civic business leader than as a basketball player. Clearly, his best days were in front of him, even when he was faced with what seemed like a life-or-death situation.

During the financial crisis of 2008, bankers and investors saw their fortunes disappear in the economic downturn. People could easily have told themselves that their lives as they knew it were over and that their fortunes would never be restored. The smart folks, with a growth mindset, didn’t give up and some of them are significantly wealthier today than they were pre-2008. They leveraged their experience and saw an opportunity for a different kind of success. Certainly, their best days were in front of them.

What about when the dot.com bubble burst in 2000? Sure, in the short term, many companies almost completely lost their value. But now, tech companies like Facebook, Alphabet (Google) and Amazon are all booming and their owners and investors are successful beyond belief. But in 2000–2002, it sure seemed to appear as if the world was ending. I bet Jeff Bezos would have said his best years were ahead of him.

Back to the question: Are your best days behind you, or are the best years of your life in front of you? Ultimately, you get to decide.

Perhaps you can think about the base of experiences you have built pre-COVID. The experiences, the contacts, the habits. Can you now leverage all that experience to make your future years even better?

For me, the easiest choice I make every day is to only worry about those things I have control over. Everything else is not worth a worry.

For example, my personal health and fitness are within my control. Some people would see it as a hurdle or excuse that all gyms are closed. For me, my trainer is now 60 miles away since I moved. But my health is within my control, and so instead I have taken up vigorous walking and hiking every afternoon. Five-mile walks with plenty of hills are my new routine. I dusted off all those free weights gathering dust in my garage and have now converted a spare bedroom into a mock gym.

So, as you are pondering how you can guarantee that your best days are ahead of you, consider these three perspectives:

Stay Focused – don’t be distracted by all the negativity in the news and only focus on those things within your control
Stay Healthy – taking care of your body and mind will help you better deal with stress
Be Grateful – studies have shown that those who focus on the “glass half full” have a better attitude, deal with stress better and have happier lives. I’m sure there are things you are grateful for. Perhaps it’s saving time and gas if you are working from home and not having to drive to work every day. Or maybe it’s the extra time you’ve had to cook at home or the eight hours of sleep you now get. Being grateful gives you the positive energy to deal with anything and everything.

For me, I know the best days of my life ARE in front of me and no pandemic or sheltering-in-place guidelines can stop me from enjoying life! How about you?

Karen

Times like these allow us the opportunity to discover what we are truly made of, and for me, perspective is key. Thanks to COVID-19 and social distancing and sheltering from home mandates, I have now been working from my home office for more than four weeks and have had time to reflect on what lessons I’ve learned from this experience. My decades in this industry have taught me much about crises and resiliency, and how to see obstacles as opportunities.

One of the lessons that I have gleaned from this time, in partnership with my experience moving through the ups and downs of the produce industry is that you should Plan for Future Opportunities. Play for the rebound. The produce industry is a resilient business. And there will be a new normal, with plenty of opportunities for those who have planned ahead. If you have people in your business who are focused on the day-to-day and the here and now, then make sure you are looking at three, six, even 12 months down the road. Do you have the right team for your future business model? Are you selling the right products? Is your customer mix optimal? I imagine those produce companies who were focused almost 100 percent on food service must be evaluating how they can diversify. Are there opportunities to partner with other companies—companies you would have never considered before?

Another lesson I have learned is: Make decisions that are best for your business. It was Winston Churchill who said, “No crisis should go to waste.” In business, during this crisis, many of us are being forced to make difficult decisions: decisions about people, suppliers, products, and customers. Let’s be honest, how many of us already knew that we had issues with people, suppliers, or customers? Probably all of us. But we never took care of making those tough decisions, because, well, we didn’t HAVE to. But now, at a time when we are being forced to make those difficult, life-changing decisions to assure our viability as businesses, we are making them. This allows us to re-prioritize and do a deep dive into our values and find that resiliency. Each challenge is an opportunity for discovery.

Always remember to take care of yourself first. If you are not in a good space you cannot take care of anyone else. That is why the most important priority is to take care of ourselves— physically and mentally. Getting enough sleep, a regular exercise regime (preferably outdoors for fresh air) and making healthy eating choices. During the workday, I make myself get up every hour or so, for a walk around the house. After work, walks or hikes are the highlight of every day (if it’s not raining) and having set sleeping hours has certainly made getting in this new work-from-home (WFH) rhythm easier. Social distancing i.e. not seeing friends in person has been a challenge. Connecting with friends—whether they are in produce or not—helps with our mental health. Even if you have to make a “Friends List” and schedule time each day to call at least one friend or see them via FaceTime, Skype or Zoom, staying connected will prevent that feeling of isolation.

And the lesson that should remain a steadfast practice rain or shine: Show gratitude. Be grateful. Whether you are grateful to be healthy, or grateful for your friends and family—or grateful for a paycheck or a nimble business strategy. At least once a day, I find myself being grateful, even in the midst of the trials and tribulations of running a company, having friends face health challenges, and not being able to see my family, coworkers, and friends in person. I can always find something that I am grateful for. And stopping, taking a deep breath and saying it out loud causes me to be a little bit calmer.

A few years from now, as we look back on 2020, we will say “I am a better person because of what I learned during that crazy year.” Let’s not forget, this is a great year to make lemonade out of Meyer Lemons.

Onward and upward,

Karen

I am not a game person. I don’t play cards and I don’t do puzzles. (Or at least that’s what I’ve always told myself.)

However, occasionally my BFF Betsy will invite me over for an evening of cards with her poker group. Or when I visit my friends David and Paula in Prescott, Ariz., we will work on a puzzle between glasses of wine and rounds of golf.

But honestly, I can count on one hand the number of times I have played Monopoly in my life.

Enter: social distancing and sheltering at home.

So, I’ve been working from home for almost four weeks, and after working hours and an evening walk, it’s been a challenge to decide on evening entertainment. Oh, did I mention that I don’t really watch much TV?

So one evening, my partner Jack says to me, “Have you ever played MasterMind®?” Uh, did I mention that I don’t play games?

I took a deep breath and said, “No, have never heard of it.” So, Jack tells me that it was the “Game of the Year” in 1973 and it’s his favorite travel game, as only two people play it.

Out comes this plastic box filled with colored pegs.

Jack tells me this is his travel version and I quickly Google it to find out that not only are there regular-sized MasterMind® sets, but you can with play it online alone or with friends!

Here’s the lowdown on the game, based on my first three experiences.

There are six colors of pegs: Red, Yellow, Orange, Blue, Green and Brown.
One person (the codemaker), arranges four pegs in a shielded part of the board (any color combination of one, two, three or four colors).
The second person (the codebreaker) has the job of figuring out the correct colors and proper order, by arranging four pegs on the board.
The codemaker scores the setup of the pegs: for each correct color you give a white peg and for each correct color in the correct location, a black peg.
You have six chances to guess the correct color configuration.

Now, because I am not a regular game player, this game sounded ludicrous. I mean, how would you be able to figure it out? But, because I am fairly competitive, I decided to give it a go. During my first go-around as the codebreaker, I talked through my thought process with Jack (who has played it hundreds of times). I was surprised by using deductive reasoning, and testing various colors and positions, during my first game I solved the problem in six rounds! The second and third time I solved the problem in five rounds.

As I was playing the game, I realized that I was working different parts of my brain than I normally use during the day. And it felt kind of good. Was I actually learning a few business lessons from playing MasterMind®? In business and in life, I learned that by taking a break from my normal routine I was exercising different parts of my brain.

I learned that even if a solution seems impossible, by using deductive reasoning and eliminating options, I could—by process of elimination—figure out the answer. By talking possible options through—out loud—the simple act of hearing my evaluation of both the current scenario and the desired state helped me find the perfect solution.

Unfortunately in this game, you cannot consult someone else. It is you, the codebreaker, against your opponent, the codemaker. But doesn’t that happen in business, too? You don’t have time or the option to consult someone else who might see things from a different view. Sometimes we have to make decisions on our own, with what seems to be limited information. So it is important that we train ourselves to consider all options, use all available information and concentrate.

Although I’ve never been a big fan of playing games, my eyes have been opened to how games and game strategy can help us with other challenges in our life.

If you’ve never heard of MasterMind®—or played it—I encourage you to check it out. I’ve become a big fan.

I see more game playing in my future. Monopoly, anyone?

Karen

Obviously, the hardest part of this entire “social distancing” requirement is that we cannot spend physical time with our family, friends and coworkers. Sure, we can wave at our neighbors on neighborhood walks, but what about those friends who we used to get coffee with, or in my case, see at the multitude of industry conferences and meetings?

I’ve decided to attack this challenge the same way I do my normal work stuff. I’m going to plan my day in advance and make a list of everything I want to do—in this case, who I want to connect with.

How about this?

Make a list of all the friends you normally keep in touch with.
Make a separate list of your family members who you want to touch base with.
Get out your daily calendar (or use the task list in Outlook on your computer) and block out time each day for touch-base calls. Block out this time on your calendar a week at a time vs. each day.
Text or email each of your friends and family and slot them into times that work for both of you. Try blocks of 15 minutes or 30 minutes. Be sure to give yourself breaks between calls.
I’ve found that for me two calls a day is optimal (mostly because I am working from home during the day).
Get a feel for how often you want to touch base with people. With my two daughters, I check in daily. Sometimes the calls are 5 minutes, sometimes 30 minutes. For friends, the calls may be once a week, and for others twice a month.
Make a check-mark on your lists (above) to indicate when you’ve completed each call.
Consider sending the person a quick text after your call to show your gratitude to them. Emojis are a great way to express your feelings. Or, go old school, and pen a handwritten note. (Good use for all that stationary you’ve had sitting in your desk drawer!)
And be ready to throw out the plan when you need to! Sometimes I just need to call my sister Jackie and have a good laugh. Connecting with others has done wonders to get me through this crazy time.

And what about exercising? I keep seeing photos of friends on Facebook and Instagram who are baking and cooking up a storm. I’m a bit worried to see what happens after a few months of this—will all of us have gained unwanted weight? (I use a fitness app to track my weight a couple of times a week. This keeps me honest.)

I’ve really become diligent about tracking my steps each day and writing down what kind of physical activity I’m doing daily, including how long I spend exercising. Working from home, it’s super easy to stay seated at my desk all day and not find time for exercise. So, each day I fill my Month-at-a-Glance calendar with:

Number of steps each day
Type and length of exercise completed
Books I’ve completed
Number of handwritten notes I’ve sent
Hours of sleep each night

I have also heard about some of the family dance challenges on social media and that seems like a great way to keep you moving along with your quarantine-mates!

I know it might sound a little crazy to be tracking so many things and planning out my personal phone calls to friends and family, but I’ve found that I am getting so much more done by taking an organized approach to each day. And that’s exactly what I’ve learned from time management experts: Those who approach their personal lives with the same discipline and focus that they do in planning their work day, get the most done and feel the most personal satisfaction.

It’s so easy during this time of “work from home” to let the hours of the day ebb and flow, and all of the sudden another day has passed. Try some of these hacks and see how much more accomplished and positive you feel at end of each day!

Karen

Like you, I find myself feeling a bit anxious about the roller coaster of the stock market, the constant emails and the CNN Alerts I receive about the latest COVID-19 warning, plus the ever-present worry of “Will I run out of toilet paper?”

I don’t think I will run out of toilet paper, but I’ve decided I am only going to worry about things that are within my control. Once I decided that, it made things feel more, well, controllable.

So, I wanted to share some ideas with you to help you take advantage of all the time we will have on our hands, since we can’t go to bars, restaurants, movie theaters, gyms, concerts, meetings or parties.

Take up daily meditation. I personally spend 20 minutes every morning listening to an app on my phone. The essential focus is on remaining calm by being in a quiet place and sitting with your eyes closed. I use deep breathing to lower my heart rate, clear my mind and create a sense of calm. I meditate first thing when I get up in the morning. What a great way to start the day.
Every day, clean a room, a drawer, a cabinet or desk. This past weekend, we tackled the cabinets under the sink in our bathroom. It’s kind of cathartic to pull everything out, wipe down the cabinet, throw out everything expired or duplicates, and then rearrange in clear plastic bins/shoe boxes. It’s so much easier to find everything! And it gives you a small dose of personal satisfaction for accomplishing something when you can see immediate results.
Set aside an hour each day and take a brisk walk or bike ride. Exercising is important during times of stress, and since your gym is closed, you should be careful that you don’t stop exercising all together. If you miss the free weights and TR-X straps at the gym, try using cans or water bottles as weights and order a Stretchable strap from Amazon to do your own homemade TR-X workout.
Sleep at least 7.5-8 hours a night. The single biggest thing you can do to deal with stress, make better decisions, feel good about yourself and not be snappy with your family is to get a good night’s sleep! I personally have been following the practice of having a set bedtime and wake time, and it has made the sleep routine so much easier.
Catch up on reading. Both at home and at work, I have a stack of magazines that I need to read. One a day is plenty … and it’s a great opportunity to learn something new without the commitment of reading a whole book.
Experiment with cooking. I always find the chefs on The Food Network fascinating to watch. I especially like the show “Chopped.” Why not take a few unusual ingredients from your pantry or refrigerator and figure out a new recipe to make? You can go to epicurous.com or my latest favorite source www.food52.com and enter the ingredients you want to use or the type of dish you want to make and voila! Is your grocery store out of apples, oranges and bananas? This is a great time to buy a whole jackfruit and learn how to break it down and freeze it. Better yet, use it to make an excellent chili. Big batch cooking will help you stock the freezer with something fresh to enjoy later on.
It’s spring … how about gardening? Time to pull weeds, till the soil and plant some flowers or vegetable plants in your front or back yard. Touching the earth (albeit with gardening gloves on) can be grounding. And, again, by planting flowers in your yard, it will give you something to smile about when you go outside or arrive home.
Organize your emails. I don’t know about you, but I have too many emails in my inbox and other folders. But I’m afraid to really delete them, in case I might need some info. Why not allocate some time during the week to organize your emails? I know in the last few days I have discovered emails I never responded to or found a few that needed action.
Help others who are quarantined. Do you have friends or family who cannot go to the grocery store, get their prescriptions picked up or just need an errand run? My assistant Tricia shared with me this morning what she was able to do for her mother, who is elderly, including calling her doctor’s office and getting her prescriptions changed to “deliver by mail on auto-fill.” It reduced anxiety and worry for her mother, and I’m sure gave Tricia a feeling of satisfaction by helping her mom. Who can you help?
Call a friend or family member. (Or hand write a letter.) In this age of texting, Instagram and Facebook, we’ve lost the art of old-fashioned personal communication. I personally enjoy penning a note to a friend to thank them and during my commute to and from work each day, I used the time to connect with friends and family by phone. Since I am now working from home for the next couple of weeks, I plan to make time to phone a friend each day, to stay connected.

I hope these ideas inspire you to look at the bright side of this new era we are living in. And I welcome your ideas for filling in all this free time we now have on our hands.

Karen

The term “spring cleaning” always makes me think about the weather changing from the cold, winterish, chilly days to the warmer spring weather—something about the windows getting opened, the house getting filled with fresh air—means it’s time to clean out your closets, drawers, etc.

Well, spring does not officially start until next week on Thursday, March 19. (Did you know that the date of spring changes based on the vernal equinox, which can be March 19, 20 or 21? This year it’s March 19.) But, in my humble opinion, it’s not too soon to start organizing yourself to do some “spring” cleaning. And, yes, I think you need to do spring cleaning in an organized fashion.

Last week, I actually sold my residence of more than 17 years and moved. When Mayra, CEO of the moving company, came to give me a quote a few weeks ago (it was awesome to learn that I was dealing with a woman-owned business!), she said in her bold, direct fashion: You need to purge your stuff. Go through your clothes, your kitchen, your books. You have way too much stuff!

Mayra was right, of course. Even though I had purged my stuff about four-and-a-half years ago (you can read my blog about how I was inspired by reading The Life Changing Magic of Tidying Up – the book changed my life!) I apparently had accumulated a few too many more things. 🙂

So, I just resurrected my inner Marie Kondo, and started going through each part of my house:

The kitchen—I went through my pantry and looked at code dates and tossed things out of code. I then took all my snack items to work (which removed temptation for me in my new home!). I had stopped purchasing anything nonperishable about a month ago to minimize the amount of food I would have to pack.

My closet—I didn’t do a complete Marie Kondo (also referred to as the konmarie method) and take everything out of my closets and drawers and ask myself if each piece made me happy before deciding to keep or donate. What I did ask myself as I went through every piece of hanging clothing and everything in my drawers: “When was the last time I wore this? Do I feel good in it?” That helped me give away at least 50–60 pieces of hanging clothing and four or five bags of clothes and shoes. Oh yeah—then I went to my hall closet and found another 10 coats and jackets I could donate to a shelter. Sometimes we forget that we have clothes in many places around our house.

My office— Everyone has a junk drawer, right? You know, the drawer you just throw random stuff into? Well, I feel like my desk was completely made up of “junk drawers.” I had old tax paperwork, useless receipts, plus office supplies galore. Just to shock myself into doing something radical, I actually DID dump the contents of all of the drawers onto the middle of my home office. It really forced me to purge heavily.

I remember a consultant many years ago telling me that it was hard to stay focused on your work if your work area that you looked at was a mess. At work I have taken that very seriously and work hard to leave my desk perfectly neat and straightened when I leave work each evening. That way when I come to work in the morning, I have a clean slate. Well at home, I had trinkets everywhere! Thank goodness I was moving, so I had to decide—keep or toss. (Or re-gift! I know it’s difficult when a close friend or child gives you a gift or photo. You feel obligated to keep it in sight.)

I always say “thank you” when someone gives me one of those gifts. But if it’s not something I really want, like or can use—chances are I put it directly in my “donation pile” at home. You know … I am sharing the wealth.

So, think about it. Look at your work area right now while you are reading this. Is your desk cluttered with mail, papers, trinkets and statues? Do you coincidentally find it hard to concentrate and get things done? Think: Clear space, clear mind. Seriously, it is amazing how much more productive you feel when your work area has been decluttered.

As I write this, and am looking at my desk at work, I realize that I have some work to do! A few too many photos, statues, and gobs of unnecessary paper and notebooks. Seriously, I need to take my own advice!

I guess it really IS time to get ready for spring cleaning!

Karen

I probably wouldn’t have thought a lot about Women’s History Month (March) or Women’s History Day (March 8), except that Whole Foods Markets nationwide are featuring some of their women-owned suppliers in many of their stores/departments during the month. And you can guess who is featured in produce … yep—Frieda’s Specialty Produce!

It all started with the person who is head of produce buying for Whole Foods calling me about 4 months ago. He mentioned that he pitched the idea of including Frieda’s to the higher ups in his company as they were brainstorming their “Women Makers” campaign. It sounded awesome, but I didn’t expect it to be a super big deal. I passed the info along to our sales rep in charge of Whole Foods and forgot about it.

Last week, while I was at an industry trade show, all of a sudden I started getting an unusual amount of text messages and emails. Turns out that Whole Foods had just sent an eblast/newsletter to their gazillion subscribers announcing their Women Makers’ Promotion…check it out here: Women Makers: Female Firsts.

Of course it is exciting to see my eldest daughter Alex as the face of Frieda’s plastered across more than 500 Whole Food Markets in the U.S.A. What’s even more exciting is to see the enthusiasm and beauty of the produce displays built with our products including Yellow Dragon Fruit, Jackfruit and Mandarinquat . From what I can tell (by the reorders from the stores), the fruits and veggies are flying off the shelves!

So I decided to do a deeper dive into the origins of Women’s History Day.

The first National Woman’s Day was observed in the United States on February 28, 1909. The Socialist Party of America designated this day in honor of the 1908 garment workers’ strike in New York, where women protested against working conditions. The International Women’s Day (IWD) date was moved to March 8 in 1913. The day aimed to help nations worldwide eliminate discrimination against women. It also focused on helping women gain full and equal participation in global development. And, just an FYI, International Men’s Day is celebrated on November 19 each year.

The United Nations began celebrating International Women’s Day in the International Women’s Year—1975. In 1977, the United Nations General Assembly invited member states to proclaim March 8 as the UN Day for women’s rights and world peace.

The theme for International Women’s Day 2020 (on March 8) is: I am Generation Equality: Realizing Women’s Rights #eachforequal. The theme is aligned with UN Women’s new multi-generational campaign, Generation Equality, which marks the 25^th anniversary of the Beijing Declaration and Platform for Action. You can find out more here.

I was curious to find out if there was a special color or symbol associated with International Women’s Day. Before I consulted Dr. Google, I thought to myself, wouldn’t it be an amazing coincidence if it was the same color that my company—a women-owned company—uses (hint: purple)? No surprise here … as we all know there is no such thing as a coincidence.

Purple is the internationally recognized color to symbolize women, while the combination of the colors green, purple and white is meant to represent women’s equality, according to the IWD website. Purple, or the combination of those three colors, may be displayed to celebrate International Women’s Day.

Although International Women’s Day started as a protest against working conditions for garment workers, today companies like Whole Foods and many other large organizations are using it to promote women, to highlight the role women play in their organizations and to recognize women’s contributions to the world. Even Costco listed a book in their monthly magazine about the role of women: The Girls of Atomic City, the untold story of the women who helped win World War II by Denise Kiernan. I just started reading it today and I can tell it is a page-turner.

As we look back to 1909 and forward past the year 2020, you might wonder what work is being done to measure the role of women and the journey to a 50/50 ratio of women to men serving on corporate boards of directors. Check out the work being done by 2020 Women on Boards.

So, as the weekend approaches, I challenge you to put on your favorite purple shirt, think about the role of women in your life and consider who you might inspire to make this world a more equitable and peaceful place for everyone. Men and women. Old and young. Rich and poor.

I personally will be thinking about my favorite female role model—my mother Frieda Rapoport Caplan, whose favorite color was purple. I will also be thinking about my father, Al Caplan, who always was one of the biggest advocates I knew for gender equality.

I am very proud of my family roots.

Karen

We all deal with the passing of a loved one differently. For me, writing has always been cathartic. But when my 96-year-old mother, Frieda Rapoport Caplan, The Queen of Kiwi, passed away on Saturday morning, January 18, I had to take a pause from writing. But, without question, I knew what I would title this post when I had the inner strength to write it: “A Life Well Lived.”

Within hours of an email announcement to our family and close friends of her passing, the Los Angeles Times posted an amazing obituary (LA Times Frieda Caplan) written by our friend, Gustavo Arellano. Typical of my mom, when a first lunch meeting was set up with Gustavo many years ago, they became fast friends. They shared political beliefs, a love of food and were instantly connected. Gustavo’s email undoubtedly was in my mom’s outlook contacts … thus he heard right away.

In the weeks following her passing, it was kind of incredible to watch the press coverage. I always felt like my mom was truly an icon, and newsworthy, so it was gratifying to see that the The Washington Post (The Washington Post Frieda Caplan), The New York Times (The New York Times Frieda Caplan), The Wall Street Journal (The Wall Street Journal Frieda Caplan), and the Orange County Register (The OC Register Frieda Caplan) all felt the same way. Segments aired on NPR’s “All Things Considered” (NPR Frieda Caplan) and KNX Radio .

And how about the CBS Sunday morning segment that was filmed last November and was never shown? Once the producers of the segment got word of Mom’s passing, they immediately found a way to make sure it aired as a tribute on Sunday January 19. It was as if the universe had planned it that way (CBS Sunday Morning Remembering Frieda Caplan).

I started working with my mom on October 3, 1977, right after I graduated from college. So, basically, I spent almost every single day for 42 years working alongside my mom.

But it was outside of business, the time we spent going to conventions and trade shows, that my Mom and I developed an extra special relationship, because we both belonged to the Trusteeship, part of the International Women’s Forum (whose goal is “to link prominent women leaders from diverse fields and industries in Southern California to engage and connect”). For more than 30 years, I would drive both of us to attend events almost monthly. On our drives to these events in Los Angeles, we had a chance to recap our day at work. At the forum’s dinner we rarely sat next to each other so we could meet other people. So, on our drive home, we would talk about who we sat with and what we thought of the program.

I was always a bit jealous of my mom’s conversations, as she seemed to sit next to the MOST interesting women. I finally realized that it wasn’t that mom sat next to more interesting women. It was because she asked the best questions. She was so interested in the other person and finding out what was special about them that she extracted incredible information from each person. And because she was a voracious reader, she was always up on current events.

During our conversations on those drives home, I recall thinking, “I want to be more like her.” I want to be more interested in other people, I want to ask the best questions, I want to make other people feel like they are the most important person in the room. What I also noticed during those evening dinners we attended was that when mom was away from work, and surrounded by all these amazing women, she actually glowed. In fact, I swear that her wrinkles disappeared.

This past Saturday, we had a Celebration of Life for my mom. More than 1,000 people attended from all over the country. Family, growers, customers, employees, former employees, friends, politicians … all had become friends of Frieda. We had 15 speakers and two emcees. Afterward, we shared a veggie-centric lunch, featuring some of the discoveries made possible by The Queen of Kiwi.

We live streamed the program for those who could not attend; it’s available: here.

Many will think that my mom’s legacy would be the more than 200 fruits and vegetables that she is credited with introducing to American consumers: sugar snap peas, purple potatoes, habanero chiles, shallots, fresh ginger, spaghetti squash, sun-dried tomatoes, fresh herbs and hothouse cucumbers, to name a few. And, of course, her most famous: kiwifruit and brown mushrooms!

But I think my mom’s legacy is really her passion about being an active citizen. On the printed program we distributed, we quoted from a speech she gave when she received her Honorary PhD from Cal Poly-San Luis Obispo in 2014:

“Never bad-mouth others, always listen to the whole story. Be a voice in your community. Be politically active, vote, speak up.”

My mom was not just my business partner. My mentor. My biggest promoter. She had become my confidant and best friend. I will miss our afternoon conversations when I called her from my car. I will miss her grilling me on my client or grower meetings or asking me probing questions about a conference I attended.

I will miss how we laughed about my mistakes, and her deep, deep caring about my personal happiness. I am especially glad she knew and approved of the love of my life.

She was the kindest, happiest person I ever knew. And now, in hindsight, I find myself doing the same things that she did in business—questioning the status quo—which years ago I found annoying. Now I find what she did daring and brilliant.

Yes, I want to be more like her.

Karen

Some people may think that kindness is overrated. I’ve been pondering this over the past week based on a couple of recent experiences.

You know how it feels when the service is slow in a restaurant and you want to show your frustration to your server (when in fact it may have nothing to do with the server—perhaps the kitchen is short staffed or they got deluged with orders). Or maybe you’re just mad about something or someone has let you down.

I get those feelings sometimes, especially when I am in traffic and I get frustrated at the pace that others are changing lanes, etc. Being kind isn’t always a natural reaction.

But during the last week, I had the most curious experiences. Two different people commented “thank you for being kind” to me after we were interacting during a time of frustration. Let me explain.

Experience #1: I get my prescription glasses at a special shop in Santa Monica about 40 miles from my home. I know it may seem a bit crazy to select new frames at a shop so far from my house, but I have found that not only are the designs unique, but the quality of my prescription and the fit are superb. So, you can imagine my frustration on Saturday when I went to pick up both my new regular specs and sunglasses and found that both frames were wrong. I was a bit put out that they had confirmed to me that both pairs were ready, so after lunch with a friend, I strolled into the shop completely prepared to walk out with my new, super cool-looking glasses. Wrong! It turned out that the person who had written up the order had written down an incorrect color for both frames. That person was not in the shop on the day I returned to try on each pair. However, the person who was helping me was extremely apologetic. She kept saying over and over again how sorry she was, and that she knew how much of an inconvenience it was for me. She and her colleague spent about 20 minutes helping me reselect the correct colors and rewriting the order. They offered to ship my new glasses to me so I would not have to drive up to Santa Monica again.

I guess her kindness and empathetic way of handling the situation caused me to dial down any frustration I had. I found myself being a lot more patient than usual. And after we completed the paperwork, and I thanked them, the clerk said to me, “Thank you for being kind.” (Wow—that really made me feel good that she perceived I was kind, instead of frustrated and impatient!)

Experience #2: I have been doing a remodeling project at my mom’s house for the past year. It felt like it a never-ending project with lots of hiccups, delays and issues. In the middle of our project, the construction company was sold, so I had to deal with new owners and a variety of workers. But the original project supervisor, Eddie, was a really nice guy. He would go the extra mile when there was an issue in my mom’s living area, and would respond quickly and always said “hello” to her when he arrived. He’s from Israel, and in 2018 I invited him and his daughter to our family Hanukkah dinner, as I thought they would enjoy the tradition celebration.

But after the company was sold in June, he was let go and I had to work with another supervisor. Just last week, we finally got the project completed, but there was still a lockbox (with a house key) at my mom’s house, and no matter who I called, no one seemed to have the code to remove it. And then I remembered Eddie.

So yesterday I texted him and asked if he could help. I also asked how he was doing and how his daughter was doing. His reply was, “It was my lockbox, I’ll come remove it tomorrow. It was a pleasure meeting you, your family and your amazing mom. Thank you for being so kind to me.”

There was that phrase again: “Thank you for being kind.”

What I’ve learned is that it really doesn’t take much time to inquire about someone personally and ask how they are doing before we jump into business or the agenda at hand. But many times we are in such a rush or are feeling such pressure, that we tend to skip that step.

How would it make you feel, if after an interaction with someone where you had to solve a problem or deal with a real issue, they commented to you, “Thank you for being kind”? Or, if you’re at work and have to deal with tough situations, how would you feel if the feedback you heard was, “She is tough and firm, and pretty demanding, but she handles things in a kind way.” If I was applying for a position at a company and asked about the company values and culture, and heard that even tough situations are handled with kindness, it would make me want to work there.

It doesn’t take a lot to show kindness. It could be a smile. It could be a kind word. It could mean taking a few extra moments to make sure there are no misunderstandings and to thank the person.

In this day of rush-rush-rush, I think taking a moment and showing kindness to others is well worth it.

Karen

For the last week or so, I have read many articles in favor of and against the practice of new years’ resolutions. As you can imagine, many people make it an annual practice of declaring resolutions to: lose weight, exercise more, be nicer to their kids/spouses, get up earlier, etc. If you visit your local gym anytime during the next month or two, you will find it more crowded than ever … filled with all those folks who made resolutions. But those crowds usually die down quickly as the year progresses.

Frankly, over the years, I have vacillated between making resolutions, declaring my own personal theme for the year and—as a third option—doing nothing.

The whole process can be a bit self-defeating and discouraging because the resolutions seem to go by the wayside quickly.

So, this year I am trying something different. I am going to follow the practices of a long-time business consultant:

During the last month, I have written out some goals for the year in the following areas: physical/health, family, travel, personal and professional. Many of these items I already do and want to continue. Others are goals that are new or a stretch for me.
I develop a list of measures for the goals. For example: under family, I want to spend “alone” time once a month with each of my daughters. For physical/health, I plan to do four cardio workouts a week and two strength training workouts. Each of these is easy to track.
I purchased a monthly planner notebook that allows me to record my activities on a daily basis. I carry it with me to/from work each day.
Most importantly, I have an accountability partner. My partner and I started discussing our goals at Thanksgiving and we each modified our own goals over the last month. We sat down on New Years’ Eve and reviewed each other’s goals for 2020. Because there are opportunities to do many of our goals together, we were able to adjust and modify our respective goals so they are in alignment.

I’ll bet you have a friend who wants to attend yoga a couple times a week with you, or a family member who also wants to see you regularly at family dinners. Or how about a close friend who wants to develop better habits in all the same areas that you do, but your specific goals are different? For me, having the monthly calendar where I can keep track of things gives me a sense of accomplishment when I can see in one place what I have done and that I have done what I said I wanted to do.

Having an accountability partner can actually make the process more fun! As long as you have a healthy relationship, not one that is too competitive or judgmental, sharing your goals and doing periodic check-ins is a gentle way to keep you focused and more disciplined.

My partner has been using this system of setting goals and tracking them for many years. He tells me that the real key is to have an accountability partner or partners (he actually calls them his “personal board of directors”). He shares his goals with them at the beginning of the year and checks in with them once a quarter to report his progress, and he asks them to challenge him when needed.

Just last night he gently asked me if I had been recording my goals on my monthly planning calendar (I admitted that I hadn’t been), and I pulled out my calendar and we walked through recording the last few days. I felt encouraged and supported about changing my habits and a sense of accomplishment that I had worked out the number of times I had committed to.

Well, this new habit applies to me in my personal life with my personal goals. But I can see the spillover effect into professional life as well.

As an example, if you work in a company, I’m sure they have a company business plan. And each department has its own plan, which rolls up into and supports the company business plan.

As a member of a department, you would have your own goals or an annual plan that you would discuss weekly or monthly with your manager. This personal/professional plan would support your department’s plan.

Remember a few months ago I blogged about “How you do anything is how you do everything”? Why not use the insights and good habits from your work and apply them to your personal life and vice versa?

And if you think I’m a little crazy to take my personal goal-setting to this level, then I must remind you of a saying I’ve often heard, “What gets measured, gets done.”

Try it!

And Happy New Year!

Karen

One of my favorite times of the year is during the end-of-the-year holidays, when my mailbox is not completely filled with junk mail. (Well, I still get a fair amount of junk mail, catalogues, etc.) But, I receive holiday cards from my friends and family near and far.

Over the years, especially since I started sending cards myself—including photos of my daughters and me and a one-page newsy family update—my evenings have become even happier as I open dozens of envelopes and then hang the cards and photos in my entrance. It has become a wonderful way to update my circle of family and friends (and a few close business colleagues) about the happenings in my family. I personally address each card. (I do get help with stuffing and stamping the envelopes, but I take great joy in hand-addressing the cards—no pre-printed labels or auto labeling from a company.) For perspective, this year I ordered 600 cards to send out.

When people question my sanity in spending my time hand-addressing that many cards, I always tell them, it gives me a moment to reflect on my relationship with each person, and I actually feel I put “love” all over the envelope when I address it. So, I address 50 or 100 each evening and they eventually get mailed. (Then I wait for the emails and comments from people when they are surprised and delighted.)

But at my office, it’s a whole other story. We stopped sending out company holiday cards many years ago because we knew our clients would get so many other cards that we wouldn’t stand out. And frankly, it seemed to be a waste of paper and postage. I mean, a corporate holiday card would be meaningless to clients. So impersonal. We would much rather call a client or send a short email or text to send a business colleague a holiday wish.

However, there are still people who we do business with who think sending a holiday card is a good use of their resources. It’s a free world, but I kind of think some companies may be on auto-pilot and maybe no one has given much thought to the whole process.

Mostly the reason I say all this is that we receive holiday cards from other companies with preprinted address labels. Preprinted company names on the inside of the card. And pre-printed postage. Every year when I get these cards, I just shake my head. I ask myself—what are they trying to accomplish?

It is so old-school to send preprinted holiday cards like this. Admittedly, we do receive an occasional card with a photo of the sales team from a company. But unfortunately they usually don’t have each person identified, so it’s impossible to know who’s who. What’s the point?

Think about it: the cost of paper, cost of printing, cost of postage, labor cost. Could you put those resources and time to better use somewhere else?

My bet is that most companies relegate this decision to someone who isn’t responsible for the bottom line or who isn’t involved in customer relations. That’s too bad.

It tells me a lot about a company, their decision making and their priorities when I receive a completely preprinted impersonal holiday card. It makes me wonder if I want to do business with them, and how much attention they will pay to my business.

Think about it. If you work at a company that sends out preprinted cards … perhaps you could make a suggestion on a better way to thank clients at the holidays!

Karen

I don’t recall where I read it, but it was a recent interview with a business thought leader. When asked, “What is the one thing you would change about Americans?” she said it makes her crazy that we say “sorry.”

At first I didn’t get what she meant. And then I started noticing how often “sorry” is said.

You might bump into someone or walk around them and say “sorry.” Back in the old days, we might’ve said “excuse me” or “pardon me.” In Spanish you would say “con permiso” (with permission may I pass?). But now we’ve become an apologetic society that says “sorry”—not even I’m sorry—for almost everything. If you think I’m crazy, spend the next few days noticing how often you say it or people say it to you.

It’s actually not a very sincere thing to say, because, frankly, much of the time we’re not sorry. We just want people to move. Or we want something. One of the most ridiculous ways it is used happens when you are ordering food at a restaurant or asking for assistance at a store. We consumers start our conversation with an apology. Next time, instead of saying “sorry” think about saying, “Thank you for your help. I would like …”or “Excuse me, I’m looking for some assistance.”

I will say, it may be difficult to make the change to remove the word “sorry” from your vocabulary. First you have to notice it. And then you have to make a very real, conscious effort to not use the word. I’ve tried, and it’s hard.

But I think it’s worth it—because starting a conversation or interaction with “sorry” doesn’t seem very positive, polite or engaging. It’s kind of lazy. So, my challenge to myself—and to you—is to avoid using that word. Unless of course you ARE sorry, and then you should say “I am sorry.”

Since we’re considering phrases that really don’t make sense, also think about the phrase “no problem.”

You go to a restaurant, to a store or interact with a friend and you ask for something, and their answer is “no problem.” If you think about it, it’s not a really sincere response. It’s actually kind of negative, as you are using two words that are not positive: “no” and “problem.”

This is another one of those phrases that we Americans have created. By giving an answer of “no problem,” we imply that the person’s request is easy to solve or resolve. To me it’s kind of a trite, insincere answer.

Because, frankly, most of the time they don’t resolve my issue. It’s like a brush off.

A friend recently pointed out the phrase “no problem” to me, and I immediately reacted by telling him that I never or rarely say that. Boy was I wrong.

Because I am trying hard NOT to say either phrase (my own personal experiment in human behavior), I catch myself daily, and sometimes multiple times a day, saying “no problem.” As I catch myself, I take a breath and smoothly insert the phrase, “my pleasure” or “that would be my pleasure” or “I am happy to help.”

But it takes discipline.

And why am I doing this? Because I think there is an opportunity for me to be more thoughtful. More engaging. More sincere. To stand out.

Now, when someone makes a request to me, instead of saying “no problem” I say, “my pleasure.” It sounds kinder just reading it, don’t you think?

Come to think about it, this kind of reminds me of when we used to say another over-used phrase, “Have a nice day!”

Think about it!

Karen

Every once in awhile you come across a small book that has a big message. That’s what happened to me a few weeks ago.

My mom Frieda and I are both voracious readers, and oftentimes we give recommendations to each other when we find a jewel. I was visiting her, and she handed me this small blue book with the title Ikigai: The Japanese Secret to a Long and Happy Life.

The cover touts the book as an International Bestseller, yet I had never heard of it. Mom said, “The message is very interesting.” And if my mom, who is 96 years old, says a book on the secret to a long and happy life is interesting, then I figured it was worth a read. It felt like Yoda was talking to me.

The authors, two practicing therapists—one from Barcelona and one from Japan—who had read each other’s work but had never met, were put in touch by a mutual acquaintance. They spoke about trends in Western psychology and specifically logotherapy, which helps people find their purpose in life.

The opening page features this quote: “Only staying active will make you want to live a hundred years.” —Japanese proverb

And that is the essence of the 185-page book. The chapters are simple and short, with titles like: “Ikigai: The art of staying young while growing old;” “Antiaging Secrets: Little things that add up to a long and happy life;” and “Find Flow: How to turn work and free time into spaces for growth.” There are chapters about “gentle movements”—exercises that promote health and long life (such as yoga, tai chi and qigong) and the “Ikigai Diet” highlighting the Okinawa purple sweet potato-based “miracle diet”—the way the residents of Okinawa eat that gives them the largest population of centenarians in the world!

In essence, we all have our own life’s purpose, our personal ikigai. The book is filled with suggestions on how to make space in your mind and your heart to help you find your purpose. “There is no perfect strategy to connecting with your ikigai. But what they learned from the Okinawans is that we should not worry too much about finding it.”

The book concludes with the 10 rules of ikigai:

Stay active; don’t retire. Do things you love.
Take it slow.
Don’t fill your stomach. Less is more when it comes to eating for a long life.
Surround yourself with good friends.
Get in shape for your next birthday. Exercise releases hormones that make us feel happy.
Smile.
Reconnect with nature.
Give thanks.
Live in the moment. Stop regretting the past and fearing the future.
Follow your ikigai. There is a passion inside you, a unique talent that gives meaning to your days and drives you to share the best of yourself until the very end.

As we enter that holiday season which seems to be about giving thanks and sharing love, it is a perfect time to start reflecting on what truly makes you happy. Physically, mentally, socially, professionally.

After reading the book, I was able to pause and reflect on the importance of loving your life, those who you spend time with and what you want your legacy to be.

This book would be an excellent gift to share with someone you love. I know many professional coaches who buy them by the dozen and give them to their clients! Why not share the book with your friends and loved ones?

Happy Thanksgiving!

Karen

(Spoiler alert: This blog has some very interesting information especially for men, people who like men, and men’s bodies. Read on.)

Last weekend, before a night on the town in Las Vegas with three girlfriends, we went to dinner. My friend Betsy told me how she picked the restaurant we went to. She knows I am vegan, so she reviewed all the top restaurants in the city (she’s a foodie) and evaluated who had the best vegan menu. I had no idea that restaurants in Las Vegas have separate vegan menus. But Sinatra Restaurant (Sinatra Dinner Menu) at the Encore had fabulous vegan options. I later learned that famous owner—Steve Wynn—is vegan, so he makes sure all his properties offer plant- based options.

As we sat down to dinner, Betsy said to me, “Have you see the movie ‘The Game Changers?’” I had not, and I found out it is a documentary released within the last month that highlights the facts and benefits about living a plant-based lifestyle. It uses testimonials from some of the highest performing athletes in the world (who, by the way, are—surprise, surprise— vegan!). Think tennis goddess Serena Williams, bodybuilder and lifter Arnold Schwarzenegger, runner Morgan Mitchell, Tennessee Titan football star Derrick Morgan, ultra-marathoner Scott Jurek, and cycling champ Dotsie Bausch, to name a few. Watch the trailer here:

It’s interesting that when you choose a plant-based diet, the very first thing you are asked by curious friends and acquaintances is “so where do you get your protein?” I’ve experienced this scenario myself multiple times. I calmly share that I get enough protein from the fruits, veggies and nuts I eat and that I have tons of energy. Most people roll their eyes at me, and I can practically see their thought-bubble that says “that just can’t be true!” But I believe this fact, especially after watching some of the most fit and competitive athletes in the world share their stories about how their recovery times are faster, how they have less inflammation, they sleep better, they win more competitions and set new performance records. I will never have another worry when asked about my protein intake.

The movie “The Game Changers” was quite clever; it’s based on the premise that the biggest contingent of meat eaters (think steak) is probably men. So, many of the examples and case studies in the film feature men.

A portion of the film shows an experiment they did with three male college athletes during which they fed them a meal with meat and the next day a meal that was only plant-based. The experiment took place as a sleep study, during which time they measured the size and frequency of the erections the men got while they slept. (Size and frequency was measurably better when they ate a plant-based meal)

They also experimented with members of the NY1 Fire Department (whose drop in cholesterol and high blood pressure was dramatic with a plant-based diet) and certain members of the Tennessee Titans football team. You can likely guess the results: The Tennessee Titans developed a remarkable record of winning after almost a dozen members of the team changed to a plant-based diet. Find more info here: The Game Changers Movie Core-Principles.

Of course, in the movie most of the people featured are 100% vegan … but when Arnold Schwarzenegger was on screen, he proclaimed that starting with one meal a day or one meatless day a week works well as a start. That was one of the best points of the film—sharing data about performance and health, but not in a preachy way. We all have to make decisions that feel right to us. And we all will move at our own pace.

So, if you are interested in having less inflammation and pain in your body, having more energy, improving your physical performance and endurance, looking younger, feeling less bloated after you eat, helping the planet by reducing waste and pollution caused by animal ranching, then I encourage you to watch the documentary “The Game Changers”. It’s available on Netflix … and is less than 2 hours long.

If nothing else, you might want to watch the scene in the movie with the three college guys and their “sleep study.”

Karen

Does your place of work host visitors? Do you feel like every time a group is coming to visit that you give a different tour of your offices or facility? Or do you offer a standardized experience? Often it depends on who is giving the tour.

My company is housed in an 80,000 square foot produce distribution center, including 20,000 square feet of offices, and we get visitors often—either customers or suppliers or friends in the industry. This week we are gearing up for the largest annual U.S. produce trade show at the Anaheim Convention Center (not far from our offices). Since we are the geographically closest produce warehouse, we have more than a dozen visitors and tours scheduled.

As a company, we have always put a lot of effort into planning and organizing special events. In fact, we consider all “visitors” a special event. From experience we know that the effort we put in ahead of time to plan visits and engage all the right players in our company will pay off in terms of a positive visitor experience.

Here’s how we do it. Several weeks before any visit, we have a planning meeting where the host (whomever has invited the visitor) meets with a team and reviews the plan. We hammer out things like arrival time, whether they get a warehouse tour (or not), whether they get an office tour (or not), who they will meet with and what kind of refreshments we want to serve them. Do they get a level 1, level 2 or level 3 tour? What gift do they get when they leave? (We know everyone is a consumer of our product, and we want them to leave with a memory they can refer back to when they get home).

Our number one goal is to treat every visitor to our facility like a visitor to our home. We put their name on the marquee when they enter the lobby, so they immediately feel welcome. (Most of our visitors ask to have their photo taken in front of the marquee—they get excited to see their name in lights!)

Our meeting room is always prepped with refreshments, notepads and paper. Sometimes our meetings are at one of the two community tables we have in our offices; we meet there so visitors can feel the vibe of the company and are not closed in by a conference room with a door.

Another best practice we have—that truly falls in line with our company culture—is that everyone in the office gets introduced by name to all visitors. It makes our team members feel important, and it allows our visitors to see that we are truly a family and everyone is valued.

We have checklists, we send out company announcements the day we’re welcoming people, and it’s like “all hands on deck” to greet our visitors.

How does that pay off?

Visitors get a fabulous tour experience. Almost every single person who visits Frieda’s comments that “everyone who works at Frieda’s seems so happy!” They walk away with a feeling that they are important and that we value our business relationship with them (and we DO!). In fact, one of our best practices is that we want either my sister Jackie or me personally to say hello to every visitor. Nothing says “family business” with hands-on management more than a “hello” from one of the owners.

But the benefit has been that our team members feel more engaged. More valued. More important. They oftentimes get to meet our biggest clients and our most important growers. It works especially well when a grower visits and we take them into accounting and can say, “Patricia and Millie are the ones who make sure your bills get paid quickly.” Both the grower and our staff are happy to put a name with a face.

So, if you have visitors to your facility or business, perhaps you should consider standardizing your process for giving tours while still conveying that personal touch. I have a consultant who always says, “Systems and Processes: there shouldn’t be 10 or 100 ways to do something. There should be one way—your way. The best way.”

It may take a little more time up front, but what I’ve learned over the years is that the more time we invest before an event in the planning and getting alignment with our team, the better the performance and user experience. This applies not only to tours. It’s true for any project or event.

Karen

I was reading through a business book and saw this quote: “How you do anything is how you do everything.” It caught my eye. And, perhaps because I’ve focused on being extra self-reflective during the last week, I have given this a lot of thought.

Some people say that they have a public or business persona and that they are completely different in their personal lives. You know what I mean—they say they are super-organized, driven and type A in their business life, but at home they claim they are super-chill. I actually don’t think that’s possible.

I consider myself and my habits when stating this. After much self-reflection, I’ve realized that the habits I have for living are quite the same in the professional realm and my personal life. For example, it is no secret that I tend to make decisions quickly, based on my gut. I don’t often enough spend time gathering a lot of data—it’s like in Malcolm Gladwell’s book Blink. In fact, I have to work very hard to remind myself to ask questions, gather data and look for any contrary concerns. This applies to both my personal AND professional life. After having some bad personal experiences, through trial and error, I now push myself to pause and not move so quickly.

How you do anything is how you do everything.

The same applies to my work life—I have found myself coming to quick conclusions and later realizing that I should have paused, asked more questions, slowed down and looked for the opposing view.

I consider myself a pretty hard-working, competitive, goal-oriented person, yet I have had limited success in achieving my personal fitness goals. So, this quote of “How you do anything is how you do everything” made me ask myself, “Why have I not lost the weight I say I want to lose? Why have I not increased my cardio fitness and the strength that I strive for?”

That’s when I realized that I lose interest and lack discipline. After all, when it comes to personal fitness, it is quite obvious that consistency and discipline are imperative when you have fitness goals. So what would it take for me to achieve these personal, physical goals?

From my business background, I know that best practices would involve writing down my goals, breaking them down into specifics. I’d need to: List actions I would have to take on a daily and weekly basis to achieve my goals. Record my activities daily and then recap them periodically to chart my progress. Focus on high-performance activities (HPAs) vs. just activities (i.e., going through the motions).

But I realized something else was missing.

Who will I be accountable to? Obviously being accountable to myself has not allowed me to achieve my fitness goals so, for me, I think it’s best to have accountability to others. Maybe I need a small group of trusted advisors or “coaches” who I agree to report my progress and results to—and who will give me honest feedback. (And who won’t buy into to my excuses!)

As I thought about this different approach for myself in my personal fitness arena, I couldn’t help but reflect back onto my business life and what best practices could be used there.

Do I have my business goals written down? Have I broken those big goals down into smaller objectives and activities with desired measurable results? Am I tracking these goals and making course corrections if I am not on track to achieve them?

Who will I be accountable to about these goals? Or, if I don’t achieve my goals, what actions will I take to change the results? Will I adjust my goals, or will I be honest and take a look at my own leadership or my team’s capabilities?

How will I celebrate when I achieve my goals? Will I be disciplined enough to set new, higher goals and objectives?

How I do anything is how I do everything.

What about this mantra speaks to you? How do you feel about your personal goals? Do you apply the same best practices from business in your personal life? Do you have written goals that stretch you? Or do you just show up and do what you’re told, and you’re satisfied with the status quo?

Think about it. I sure do. As I craft my updated personal and business plan for 2019 and 2020, I will report back to you on how it’s working.

I hope you will consider doing the same.

How you do anything is how you do everything.

Karen

Most people know that Sunday night, Sept. 29 at sundown, marked the beginning of the Jewish New Year. The holiday is called Rosh Hashanah (translated means “head” of the year). Jews all over the world go to synagogue and say the same exact prayers. Whether in California or France, Australia or Brazil, we all have the same rituals.

One of the traditions of all religious services is that the spiritual leader (in this case the rabbi) gives a sermon. I think that is universal, no matter your religion.

So, Sunday evening as I sat in temple next to my sister Jackie, I listened intently to what our rabbi talked about.

Her message was about “appreciating the good, the wonder, and the beauty of what we have.” Of course this makes sense, because it is the New Year. New Year, new opportunities. New Year, new resolutions. New Year, new reflections. Her message was a “glass half full” message. It made me smile, as I thought about how easy it is to look at the negatives, the problems, the challenges you have. What if, instead, we looked at and focused on the positive?

Once Rosh Hashanah is over there is 10-day period of time, referred to as the Days of Awe, until the next Jewish holiday, Yom Kippur. Yom Kippur, the Day of Atonement, is considered the holiest day of the year. It is a day that many Jews around the world fast (don’t eat or drink) from dawn until dusk, to remind us of those who have suffered before us.

The Days of Awe are a very special time to me. The Jewish tradition suggests that if there are any people in your life that you have had disagreements or challenges with, or there are unresolved issues, that you reach out and talk with those people, and speak the truth and offer forgiveness. So, as I sat in temple on Sunday evening, I thought about who in my life do I want to develop a richer relationship with, or want to resolve conflicts or misunderstandings? Or who do I want to have a deeper connection with? I made my mental notes and during the next week I intentionally plan to have conversations or spend time with those people.

I recall in past years that I reached out to various people (not all of them are Jewish) and it gave me a deep sense of satisfaction.

Do you have any people in your life, or who used to be in your life, that you feel you may have a nagging issue with? Or perhaps there has been a misunderstanding that you really wish was resolved. Maybe you just want to feel closer and spend time with someone. Whether you are Jewish or not, why not make a mental note of those people and send them a text, email or call them this week? Your conversation can be short or long. It can be, “I was thinking of you and wanted to say hi” or it can be an hour-long phone conversation.

Finally, my last ritual of the Jewish New Year period will be on Wednesday, Oct. 9, as the sun goes down and Yom Kippur ends. As I leave temple, I will enjoy some apples slices dipped in honey or honeycomb to symbolize the sweetness of the New Year. And then I will go to a friend’s house to “break the fast” with other Jewish friends and family.

Even if you are not Jewish, perhaps you can enjoy some of the traditions of the New Year. Be grateful for the positive people and things you have in your life. Make amends with those with whom you’ve had disagreements or misunderstandings. Don’t overeat and then break bread with family and friends to renew your bonds.

Happy New Year (L’Shana Tovah)!

Karen

P.S. In case you didn’t see this, our entire family was ecstatic on Rosh Hashanah, as The Washington Post ran this feature story on my mother Frieda and our entire family. [Read it here…]

Photo Credit: Sean DuFrene/Photographer

Everyone has a different perception of the perfect vacation.

There is the “stay-cation,” where you stay at home and either do household errands or visit places nearby. (I wish I had taken a single stay-cation in my life, but I cram all my household errands in on the weekends or after work and rarely visit local venues—except when out- of-town visitors want to go to Disneyland.)

Then there’s the “Go to a place and exhaust yourself by sightseeing from dawn to dusk” vacation. This is awesome when you are traveling to a faraway foreign country or an amazing city like Paris. After paying a hefty price for a plane ticket and lodging, it almost seems irresponsible to not see everything you can. Since these can be once-in-a-lifetime trips, I completely understand the compulsion to fill up every day with excursions.

Just this morning I got a text from a friend who’s traveling in Europe for five weeks—with an itinerary including a dozen cities and five countries. When I asked her how it was going, her final line was telling: “Next time, I would pick 2 areas and stay put.”

That’s what I’ve discovered about destination trips. Instead of doing the seven-cities-in-eight-days kind of trip, I’ve found it far more satisfying to go to a single city or region and go deep into its culture, food and people. That’s what I did last October on my trip to Tuscany/the Chianti region of Italy about 40 minutes outside Florence. I was able to learn about the food, walk the countryside, explore multiple museums, churches and villages and really understand the synergy between olive oil and wine and why Chianti Classico is now one of my all-time favorite wines.

So, next time you are planning a trip—either foreign or domestic—consider spending more time in fewer places. It’s not a competition of how many places you can visit on a single trip.

Finally, there is the “completely relaxing” vacation. And that’s what I am on right now. I am at the end of a full week on the island of Maui. I have been coming to Maui for more than 30 years. Sometimes with friends, sometimes with family. This time I am here with my two adult daughters, Alex (29) and Sophia (25).

We chuckle about our ideal vacation in Hawaii, as many people expect us to fill up our days with parasailing, snorkeling, hiking, bike rides up the Haleakala volcano, plus lots of Mai Tai’s and hours in the sun. Over the years, we have done most of those things. But after a few bad sunburns and our annual visit to the dermatologist, we don’t spend much time in the sun. My daughters have different tastes in what they like to spend their time on, so each day they drive the agenda. Usually, I take an early morning three-mile walk and come home to one or both of them making a healthy breakfast. It is literally the only time all year that all three of us sit down to eat a meal together, alone.

Mornings are spent reading, playing games and relaxing. In the afternoons, we might spend time cooling off in the pool, more reading, maybe some shopping and then we end at a local favorite restaurant. Rinse and repeat for six more days.

Why is this the perfect vacation? Because, as a parent, I get to spend quality time with my daughters. And they get to spend quality time with each other. We don’t bring spouses or boyfriends. We get to have random discussions. We laugh at various memories we have had over the years. Without fail, one of us says something super funny, which becomes the repeated theme of the trip. We get to unwind from the rat race of life back home, and because we are 2,500 miles away, we cannot easily slip back into our normal pace. If we’re tempted to go “full speed ahead,” we are reminded daily of the Hawaiian pace of life, presented to us by people like the server at our favorite coffee shop, Bad Ass Coffee, where the same woman has been serving us for 19 years.

Alex, Me and Sophia on our last day in Maui

I have been meditating daily first thing in the morning, for more than two years. Yet, every single day on this trip I have forgotten to meditate. My daughter Sophia told me, “Mommy, maybe it’s because you are so relaxed here, it’s like you don’t need to formally meditate.” Interesting.

So, as you are looking at your calendar for 2020, consider allocating some of your vacation time for recharging and clearing your mind. Maybe do some writing, read some books, or take naps.

I promise you, it will make dealing with the pace of your regular life much easier. Who knows, you may get clarity on things you need to change about your life, when you get back home.

Ommm.

Karen

Did you know there is a National Women’s Hall of Fame? It is in Seneca Falls, N.Y., in the middle of the Finger Lakes region—a rustic, agricultural area. I had no idea!

So, when my friend Eileen told me she was attending the bi-annual Women’s Hall of Fame induction ceremony last weekend and invited me to come along, I jumped at the chance.

Seneca Falls is a teeny, tiny town of less than 9,000 people about 45 minutes from Rochester. For the first time, all the celebratory weekend events including the induction ceremony were slated to take place at a venue in Waterloo, NY, a 10-minute drive from Seneca Falls. A friend told me that Seneca Falls’ setting inspired the movie “It’s a Wonderful Life,” and the town actually celebrates it every year. It is quaint, to say the least.

As it turns out, there were 11 women being inducted in this cohort. Well-known women like Jane Fonda (actress, entrepreneur, activist), Angela Davis (activist and professor), Gloria Allred (attorney and pioneer for women’s and minority rights), Diane von Furstenberg (fashion designer who invented and made famous the “wrap dress”), and Supreme Court Justice Sonia Sotomayor. Plus retired Air Force Colonel Nicole Malachowski (first woman pilot for the “Thunderbirds” Air Demonstration Squadron). You can see the entire list here.

National Women’s Hall of Fame Program

There were many amazing moments during the weekend. During the luncheon on Saturday, I had a chance to chat with journalist Gloria Steinem. I met her about five years ago at another event; it’s hard to believe that she is now 85. She has the energy of someone 30 years younger, and it was fun to tell her what I learned from reading her book “My Life on the Road.” (I learned the term “listening circles,” which I now use at my company.)

Gloria Steinem, Me & Gloria Allred (A Gloria Sandwich!)

When Supreme Court Justice Sonia Sotomayor entered the luncheon venue, there was an impromptu standing ovation. It was kind of surreal to realize I was sitting 10 feet from a Supreme Court Justice who radiated such humbleness and authenticity.

The induction ceremony was in the theater that afternoon, and the two-and-a-half-hour event just flew by, as each inductee was introduced by a previous inductee. Each of their five-minute acceptance speeches was unique and from a different point of view. When inductee Dr. Flossie Wong-Staal got up, it blew my mind to learn that it was her pioneering work as a molecular biologist that prompted the discovery that the HIV virus causes AIDS. Dang it – she is the one who discovered the HIV virus! I had actually run into her in the elevator earlier that morning and asked what she was doing currently. She told me she was enjoying ballroom dancing during her retirement in San Diego. From molecular biologist to ballroom dancer! Quite a journey.

On Sunday, Eileen and I made our way to the actual Women’s Hall of Fame. Frankly, it was small and underwhelming.

National Women’s Hall of Fame Building

We learned from the Board president that morning in a few months the Hall of Fame was moving to the former Seneca Falls Mill, a huge brick building on the river. It would be a larger facility and allow more opportunities for interactive digital exhibits, etc.

But, I was still perplexed as to why the National Women’s Hall of Fame had come to be in Seneca Falls.

Finally, it was when we went to the nearby visitors’ center, we learned the American Women’s Rights Movement began with a meeting of both men and women reformers in Seneca Falls in 1848. Out of that first convention came a historic document, the “Declaration of Sentiments,” which demanded equal social status and legal rights for women, including the right to vote. So, Seneca Falls is the home of women’s suffrage! And it’s hard to believe that just 99 years ago (in 1920), women earned the right to vote in the U.S. and the 19^th amendment was ratified.

And 50 years ago, a group of Seneca Falls residents decided to create a way to honor great American women and raised money to establish the National Women’s Hall of Fame.

So, the next time you are thinking of taking a road trip through some beautiful countryside in the Northeast, I encourage you to stop in Seneca Falls. The roads are modern, the towns are quaint. And the inspiration is amazing!

Is there someone you work with that is a bit aggravating? Maybe they always disagree with you or point out the weaknesses in your idea. Or maybe it’s not at work—maybe it’s at home or in a volunteer organization.

I think we’ve all had an experience like this—it kind of takes the wind out of your sail.

That was my story on a project I’ve been working on. No matter what idea I had, or what suggestion I made, I had my small cadre of naysayers. As I prepared for meetings on this project, I found myself in a full-blown anxiety attack, as I was dreading the project meetings and the constant barrage of challenges.

After that first anxiety attack, which caused me to be short of breath, sleepless, etc. I decided there had to be another way to deal with this.

The first thing I did was call a friend. I knew I could call this friend and have her “talk me off the ledge.” By virtue of talking about my frustrations and fears, it caused me to naturally calm down and not be so tense.

The second thing I did was over-prepare for my project meetings. I would try to anticipate all the questions the naysayers would have and either send them the information in advance, or have the answers at my fingertips in our meetings. The funny thing was, after over-preparing for my meetings and sending out the detailed project updates in advance, there were no unexpected questions or negative comments! The meetings were less tense, and I was less anxious.

And finally, I did something unexpected. I regularly complimented and acknowledged my naysayers during my project meetings: “That is such a fantastic suggestion!” or “Thanks so much for bringing that up.” And it seemed as if by acknowledging them and sincerely complimenting them in a public forum (our project meeting), they didn’t feel the need to point out any weaknesses in my ideas in a disruptive way.

So, think about your personal situation. It could be at home or at work. If you find yourself getting tense just thinking about an upcoming interaction with someone, try this approach:

Over prepare. If your spouse is going to tell you that there is no way you can afford a vacation or other expenditure, pull together a personal expense recap and show them how you can afford it. Instead of being caught off guard with their comments, start your conversation with: “I bet you think we cannot afford to go on a vacation to Hawaii, so I put together this recap, so you can see how I think we can make it work!”
Rehearse what you are going to say in advance. I have found it is so much easier the second or third time you say something, so why not practice in front of a mirror or by calling a friend? I have practiced many a presentation in the car as I drive to and from events. By the time I am giving my presentation in person, I feel comfortable and natural because I have already practiced multiple times.
Compliment the person you are talking to. “I really appreciate that you look at situations differently than me. That’s why we make such a great team.” That one line alone, if said sincerely, makes people stand up tall and feel good about you.

Next time you are dreading a meeting or a conversation, try this approach. I think you’ll breathe easier. And you’ll probably have more success. I know I have.

Karen

I’ve never considered myself a particularly athletic person, but I pride myself on working out multiple times a week, alternating between cardio and strength training. Over 20 years ago, I worked with a trainer and ran my first and second 5K, and a few years ago I told my daughters Alex and Sophia what I wanted to do for Mother’s Day—go on a hike together. So off we went into Crystal Cove State Park and hiked for two hours. I remember how hot it got, even in the early morning, and how much my legs hurt and how wobbly they were for the next few days.

So, when I was invited to go on a hike this past weekend with a few friends, I was up to the challenge. I mean, how hard could it be? In retrospect, I guess I should have asked more questions.

Turns out we were going to hike the famous “Potato Chip Rock” in Ramona, Calif., in Northern San Diego County. The two-mile hike straight up a mountain (with a few switchbacks, here and there) wouldn’t have been so bad, if it hadn’t been 91 degrees that day. And because we lollygagged around that morning, we didn’t even arrive at the trail until 2:00 p.m. That’s when 91 degrees feels like 101 degrees!

Jack, me, Kevin and Van at the start of the hike.

It took 90 minutes for us to hike two miles to the top. We walked in pairs, and it really helped that we stopped multiple times in the shade to catch our breath.

However, there was no way I was prepared for what would happen at the top of that mountain.

When we arrived at the top, it took my breath away. That was because, in order to get to the actual potato chip rock (it is called that because it looks like you are standing on a thin potato chip-shaped formation), you have to climb a 12-foot tall rock and then jump about 5 feet across a deep crevice. At that point, your friends stand about 30 feet away from you and take your photo.

I crawled up on top of the huge boulder, but no matter how much my friend Jack coaxed me and told me he would be there to catch my arm, etc., I simply could not do it. All I could do was envision myself losing my footing and falling. So, after many minutes of trying to visualize myself jumping across the huge crevice, and multiple people coming up to offer assistance to me, I finally told him that I could not do it. I was literally near tears.

That was one of the hardest decisions I’ve ever had to make. To hike that far and not be able to go the last 10 feet for that amazing photo opportunity was a bit defeating.

But actually, after three hours on the mountain, I learned a few life lessons from the experience:

It really helps to have a coach and a support team when you are doing something difficult or new. Even though Jack is a marathon runner and triathlete and could have gone much faster on his own, he stayed with me the whole time, coaching and encouraging me. Sometimes the thing that gets us through a super difficult task is a friend, mentor or coworker who gives an authentic pep talk. They are completely supportive and not competitive.
You don’t have to keep up with everyone else’s pace when you are trying something new. The couple we hiked with was significantly younger than me. If I had compared my pace with theirs, I would have felt like a failure. Instead, I realized that my fitness level, experience and age meant I needed to take the hike at my own pace. How often do you judge your performance against someone else’s when it is probably better to judge your performance against your own progress?
Sometimes you just cannot do it and have to turn back before you complete a task. I made it 99% of the way and decided to turn back. Sometimes that is the bravest thing to do—to admit when you physically cannot do what everyone else has done.

All in all, I feel like the hike was a success. Even though I did not get my photo taken on top of Potato Chip Rock, we found another photo op on top of a nearby giant boulder. I was out in nature for three hours with good friends and no cell service. Lots of pauses in the conversation and time to observe nature. No texting, no phone calls. Just nature.

So next time you find yourself between a rock and a hard place, think about what your options are, and that they may not be what everyone else thinks they are.

Karen

Have you ever gotten a call or email from a friend offering to introduce you to one of THEIR friends who is coming to your city? Or how about when you are traveling to another city on vacation and a friend says their relative lives there … hinting that you should meet up with them?

As I look back over the last year, I realize this has happened to me multiple times. Initially I was a bit put off with the offers. I mean, would it be fun for me to meet someone’s sister while I am on vacation?

But, I’d like to share what happened to me on some recent trips:

Last October I was heading to Florence, Italy, for a 2-week culinary vacation through Tuscany. As usual, as I was departing Los Angeles International Airport I posted on Facebook that I was headed to Florence, Italy. One of my dear produce industry friends sent me a message that her younger sister lived in Florence. At first I had no interest, but then thought, “What the heck? Kathryn is super fun, so her sister Sarah would probably be a great person to meet up with!” Sara and I ended up meeting for dinner my last night there, and we had a fabulous conversation. I learned what it was like being an American living and working in Italy with an Italian husband and son. New friend made = check!
Me and Sara.
In March, I was attending the UC Davis Agribusiness Executive Seminar in Newport Beach, Calif., and as I was reviewing the registration list, I noticed there was someone attending from Spain. Spain? That seemed odd to me since we were in California, so when I ran into him at a reception, I struck up a conversation. It turns out he lives in Barcelona! Coincidentally, I was headed to Barcelona on vacation the next month! So, just before I left on my trip, I emailed Pablo and he offered to pick me up on Sunday for lunch. As it turns out, he and his wife Sonia took me to the most amazing museum I have ever been to: La Pedrera (also known as Casa Milá), featuring the amazing work of Catalan artist Antoni Gaudi. We then went to the seaside town of Sitges, where we had a relaxing, beautiful lunch. Two new friends made = check!
Pablo, me and Sonia.
And just last week I received an unsolicited email from two women from Miami, Fla., who were vacationing in Newport Beach. They happen to belong to the same international professional women’s group that I do, and they were interested in meeting some Southern California members while they were in town. None of our other members was available, so I offered to meet them for lunch. After all, I knew from personal experience how nice it was to have a “local” show you around while in an unfamiliar city! We discovered that we know several of the same people, and one of the women is on the board of a public supermarket chain in Canada … so we actually had a business connection! We had a completely delightful conversation and meal, and we’re planning to meet up again in November. Two more new friends made = check!
Claudia, me and Julie.

So, the next time you receive an offer or suggestion to meet up with a stranger, I encourage you to consider taking the chance. Who knows, you might make a new friend!

Karen

Let me start by saying that I have no near-term plan to retire. But I would like to share what my 96-year-old mother thinks about retirement.

Most of you have heard of my mom, Dr. Frieda Rapoport Caplan. And that up until 2019, my mom was coming into our office four days a week (she cut back a few years ago from five days a week).

It was only in late December that she chose to work from home because the trek up our two flights of stairs had gotten to be a bit much for her. But believe me, she is still on her computer from her home office, monitoring the important activities of “her baby,” Frieda’s Specialty Produce, the company she founded in 1962.

I have to be honest that at times during my career, I have been annoyed with my mom’s continuing interest in every detail of the business. She closely monitored the Accounts Receivables, sometimes volunteering to call overdue customers to ask for our money (she always got a quick response). She frequently would send emails to some of our sales reps when they made a big sale or her email might ask why a client hadn’t purchased in a few weeks. I’d be thinking, “Mom, can’t you let it go?”

And then I had the opportunity to hear Dan Buettner, the National Geographic Fellow and author of “The Blue Zones,” last month at a produce conference. It’s the second time I’ve heard Dan and for some reason, this time one part of his message really resonated with me.

When sharing the details of the five or six communities around the world where a high concentration of people live past 100 years of age, one characteristic stood out. It wasn’t their primarily plant-based diet, not their sleeping patterns of seven to eight hours a night or the involvement in a spiritual practice or religion. It wasn’t the natural amounts of exercise they get or their close-knit community of friends.

It was that they had a purpose. A reason to get up in the morning!

And it was when he was talking about having that purpose, that raison d’etre, that I realized why my mom is so vibrant. So relevant. So alive! It’s because she is still connected with, interested in and passionate about our business.

As we celebrated her 96^th birthday last Saturday, she peppered my daughters, Alex and Sophia, and me with questions about work, our clients and our growers. I realized that perhaps retirement may not be the best solution for everyone. I have read many articles that talk about people who retired and then got ill or passed away shortly after they stopped working. I’ve even had close friends who this has happened to. One of my friends recommends if you are considering retiring that you have a plan for a slow transition from your current work life to something else (a hobby, volunteer work or a Chapter 2 or 3 in your life).

As for me, as long as my mom is calling me daily asking for a recap of “what great thing happened at work today,” I plan to be working passionately.

How about you? Have you thought about what you would do if you weren’t working? Would you have a purpose, a reason to get up in the morning?

Karen

P.S. If you want to send Frieda a Happy Birthday message, please click here.

Mom and me, on her birthday this past weekend.

This is not a blog about shopping. This is a blog about removing roadblocks.

This past weekend, I needed to restock on a few things, so I headed to my local mall. Even though I went into Nordstrom only to purchase their special liquid laundry soap, I couldn’t resist taking a stroll around the store. And as you might have guessed, that little stroll ended up with me finding a few things to try on.

I have been a Nordstrom shopper since the company opened its first stores in southern California over 30 years ago. I know that in order to get access to a dressing room, you need to find a sales associate, as the dressing rooms are locked. Only the sales associates have the keys.

So, you can imagine my shock when the sales associate told me that the dressing room doors were all open, so pick whichever room I wanted!

When I went to purchase my items at the cash register, I asked the cashier, “So, when did Nordstrom unlock the dressing room doors?”

She told me that they got a new store manager about four months ago (the previous manager went on maternity leave), and the first thing the new manager did was tell the sales associates to unlock the dressing room doors.

Even though the locking practice had come into being to reduce theft, it also helped engage the salespeople with shoppers by personally escorting them to the dressing rooms. The new manager realized that it actually had become a huge inconvenience for shoppers. It interfered with their ease of shopping. And I’m guessing, she realized that it was not sending a positive message in alignment with the Nordstrom brand.

So, I asked the obvious question of the cashier, “Did theft go up after you unlocked the doors?” She told me she had not heard anything more about it, so she assumed it had not.

That made me wonder: How many “locked dressing room doors” do you have in your business? If you have an automated voicemail for your business, do you start your message with, “To speak with someone immediately, press “0” for operator,” then proceed with the directory of names? Or do you force callers to go through the directory by entering the first three letters of the person’s first or last name?

On your website, do you feature your best selling items on your home page? Or do you force customers to search through your entire website to find what they’re looking for?

When you have a visitor to your building, do you immediately offer them water or directions to the restroom? Or do you wait for them to ask?

When you give new employees your company handbook, do you give them a cheat sheet of the FAQs (such as company holidays, benefits info and payroll info)? Or do you hand them the 100-page handbook and say, “Good luck! Everything is in here.”

How many roadblocks do we naturally put up in our businesses? And if we replaced them with something easier and more convenient, would we have a better result?

If you want to “unlock the doors” in your company, know that most of them are super easy to change. The challenge may be that they are habits, with unknown origins, e.g., “We’ve always done it that way.”

It took only a bit of adjustment at our company to change our company voicemail, website, visitor-welcoming process and employee handbook.

What should you change?

Karen

I’m guessing I am not the only person who gets a hard knot in their lower neck-shoulder region. It feels so tense. Last week while I was out of town at a produce conference, it got really bad. It was like I couldn’t even turn my head without feeling the strain of my tight muscles. Does that ever happen to you?

My first angle of attack was to take an Advil and go to bed early.

I did sleep well, but unfortunately that knot in my neck was still there the next morning.

Second strategy was to get a neck massage on Monday afternoon. It felt better for a short while, but that knot returned.

So, yesterday when I went to work out with my strength coach, Yas, I let him know about my sore shoulder muscles. He looked at me and commented, “So, you sit on your **s all day at a desk, right? Typing on your computer.” And he held out his forearms and imitated my daily position, which included having my shoulders tensed up. “Yep, you’re right,” I answered.

And that’s when it dawned on me.

Why am I not using my stand-up desk?

A few years ago, a couple of our employees mentioned to me that they heard having a stand-up desk helps reduce lower back pain and shoulder tension, and actually stimulates better productivity. So we did a beta test with those two employees by purchasing units that would retrofit our current cubicles for less than $300 each. We did nothing more than give them the stand-up desks with comfort mats to go under their feet. And we waited to see what happened.

Guess what? As other employees noticed, they, too, asked for stand-up units, and everyone personally commented on how much better they felt physically during the day. It’s as if the cobwebs get cleaned out when you stand up and work. And they all have less low-back tension and it creates more energy in the office.

So this morning I came into work, and after our entire floor did stretching at 9 a.m. as part of our newly launched employee well-being program, I raised my stand-up desk. Sure enough, my shoulders felt less tense. My legs and lower back felt better. And as I looked around my office, I saw four other co-workers had raised their desks too.

Does your company offer this option? More and more companies offer these ergonomically friendly stand-up desks. But there are still some that don’t; they must not be aware that it’s an easy $300 retrofit for an existing desk. And that $300 investment is a good hedge against increased absenteeism and injury.

So if your neck and shoulders are usually tight during the work day, you might want to arrange to get a stand-up unit. It will make a world of difference.

Karen

As you may recall, I changed to a vegan lifestyle on December 31, 2018, for many reasons. Primarily it was for health reasons. I had done a lot of research during the previous year, reading books such as “How Not to Die” by Dr. Michael Greger. Although that book has a title that sounds less than positive, it actually gives you hope in each chapter about how no to die from specific diseases, such as lung cancer, breast cancer, diabetes, etc.

What I never told anyone was that a week after I chose a completely plant-based diet, I went for my annual checkup and stress test at the cardiologist. Like many CEOs, because of the stress of my job, I proactively choose to get a checkup each year, versus waiting for something to happen.

So after my annual exam, my doctor and I sat down in his office. He told me, “You have to do something. Your cholesterol has gotten really high and I am starting to see a blockage in your left ventricle. That means the left side of your heart is having to work harder.” He asked me, “Do you want my help?” And my answer was “Yes. As long as it does not involve medication. And by the way, I just went vegan last week.” He took a deep breath, thought for a minute, and then proceeded to give me his “prescription.”

Start intermittent fasting (the science was showing this was very effective, he said). That meant only coffee and water in the morning, not eating anything until noon. Eat super light for lunch and as little as possible for dinner. Really cut back on food consumption. No grains, breads, sugar, etc.
Do cardio every single day; a minimum of 30 minutes a day and up to 75 minutes a day.
Return in six months for a follow-up exam.

It took me a week or so to wrap my head around intermittent fasting. But I figured I would try it. Once I started skipping breakfast in the morning, I found I was not hungry in the morning. It was like eating caused me to want to eat more. So the longer I waited to eat, the less I was hungry. And if I started to get hungry, I would drink a lot of water. So one to two cups of black coffee in the morning have been the start of my day for the last six months.

I admit that during the first five months, I did cardio almost every single day. But as I started traveling, it got harder. But I joined a new gym in January that is super upscale, by the beach and very clean, with all new equipment. That has made a huge difference for me. I am now working out and doing cardio four to six days a week.

And of course, I have been 100% vegan since January 1. As hard as that may sound, it has actually been very easy (I like to say it is totally in the mind). I have traveled to Germany and Spain, plus New York and Houston. I’ve never had a hard time finding something to eat, no matter if I am at a steak house or a vegetarian restaurant, which I found in Barcelona. It was actually very fun and touching when I was in southern Spain visiting some grower friends; all three guys I was with chose to have a veggie lunch with me.

So, here are the results of my vegan-cardio-intermittent fasting lifestyle for the last six months. I went to see my doctor last week and had a complete blood panel done.

Cholesterol: January, 245; July, 189 (goal is to be under 200).
LDL (bad cholesterol): January, 128; July, 99 (under 100 is considered normal).
HDL (good cholesterol): January, 95; July, 69.
Triglycerides: January, 114; July, 117.

When my doctor walked in after seeing the results of my blood tests, he sat down beside me and said with a big smile on his face, “What did you do since I saw you? Your results are remarkable!”

I told him that I did everything he told me to. Plus I was 100% vegan (turns out, he is also vegan which was refreshing for me to learn). He then asked me how I felt.

I told him there were many things I had noticed since going vegan.

I want to share them with you now:

I am sleeping so much better. My sleep is more solid and I feel so much more rested, even when I don’t get my seven and a half to eight hours a night.
I lost about 10 pounds in the first three months. I’m sure it was from eating less food, and no grains or breads. I have more to lose, but I know that “calories in” are the biggest factor in weight loss. Since I work out with a strength trainer, I’m guessing some of that fat has turned into muscle.
My mind is clearer. This is a big one. As I was reflecting on the first six months of the year with my business coach last week, I commented on how much clearer my mind seems. I’m not foggy anymore. Previously I had a slower start in the morning and it would take a few hours to get going. Now, I feel on my game the minute I get to work. And everything seems crystal clear to me.
This one is kind of personal, but I noticed I’m not perspiring as much. Of course when I work out I sweat a lot, but I’ve noticed that when I am at work I don’t sweat as much. I do think that is due to my system being clear of animal products.
My thinning hair is growing back. Many of us find our hair thins as we get older. A dear friend of mine had commented on my hair thinning in the front a few years ago. It was a very personal comment she made, but that’s one of the things I love about her. Well, when I went to my hair stylist last week, we both noticed that my hair was getting thicker in all the right places.

And finally, I have to share an article that my darling mother, Frieda, gave to me last night. It’s from The Week Magazine and entitled “Red meat could shorten your life.” She said that this article is so important she wants to share it with everyone she knows. I made a dozen copies for her to share with all her friends.

I probably never told you that when I went vegan six months ago, my mom joined me! Yes, that’s right, my 95-year-old mother, Frieda, is now also vegan. And I think that is quite a testimonial as she tells me every day how much better and lighter she feels!

So, I hope you will take some time to consider whether eating fewer animal products, and more fruits and veggies, might be an easy choice for you to make. You don’t have to be as dramatic as I’ve been by going 100% vegan. In fact, another friend, also a doctor, recently decided to be “Vegan Before 6” each day. It’s all about choice, and it’s really all about making our lives better and longer.

To your good health!

Karen

Even before the two earthquakes we experienced in Southern California last week, I had planned to blog about earthquakes. If you don’t live in California, but somewhere else that has other natural events like tornadoes, hurricanes, fires or flash floods, I know you’ve had similarly scary experiences. But I’d bet you’ve never had the opportunity to listen to the world’s expert on your particular natural disaster-causing event, right?

Well, I had the opportunity to hear Dr. Lucy Jones (aka “The Earthquake Lady”) last month at the Natural History Museum. You see, one of my good friends, Lori Bettison-Varga, is the president of the museum. She invited me to one of its First Friday events. I checked my calendar and was kind of excited to drive to downtown LA after a long week, and sip a little wine in the museum’s outdoor garden.

At about 7, they started ushering us into a dark, auditorium-like room. As I looked around, I realized that we were in the Dinosaur Wing, as life-sized dioramas featuring various dinosaurs covered every wall in the huge hall.

As we sat down, I glanced at the program and noticed that famed LA Times reporter Patt Morrison would be interviewing “The Earthquake Lady.” I’m like, “Oh, this is just GREAT.” (Not really.) Frankly, like most Southern Californians, whenever there’s an earthquake, my heart starts racing and I get a little panicked. The last thing I wanted to be doing on a Friday evening was listening to a couple of people talk about earthquakes. But I was seated between Lori and her husband, Bob, so there was no escaping. Did I mention that Lori and Bob are geologists?

So, I decided to enjoy the lecture.

And frankly, I was surprised—I was surprised at how calm Lucy was. She is a seismologist and the public voice for earthquake science and earthquake safety in California. You can read tons about her right here.

What I loved most about her presentation was what I learned. Simple, basic things that I had never thought of:

Many of us buy extra water to have on hand in case of an emergency. When asked how much water you should have, Lucy answered, “No matter how much you have, you should probably buy more.”(I went out and bought a lot more water.)
She said the reason we will want more water is that if we have a huge earthquake, there is a good chance that the large, clay, underground pipes that carry water to our homes will crack. And if so, it could take a long time to repair them. So, it’s possible we will not have access to water for a while.
The other pipes that are underground, which could crack during an earthquake, carry our sewage. Picture that. Cracked sewage pipes underground. Enough said.
And finally, if the power goes out, ATMs will not work. Lucy said that most people don’t think about what it would be like without cash or access to cash. She suggested going to the bank, taking out some cash, and stashing it in a safe, secure place in your home. (I went to the bank and now have many $20 bills stashed away at home.)

After hearing Lucy talk, I felt more informed about earthquakes, what causes them and how the earth works. When you are informed, you react more calmly.

And that’s what happened as I was sitting on the floor taking off my shoes on Friday night, when we had that 7.1 earthquake about 8:20 p.m. Instead of my usual run for a doorway (Lucy said that is a fallacy; it is not a safer place to be in an earthquake), I stayed seated on the ground. That’s where Lucy said to be, away from windows, and near something you can crawl under for protection. She said many people break bones or get injured because they are running during an earthquake and they fall down because of the jarring movements.

Lucy took questions from the audience: Does fracking cause earthquakes? Do earthquakes cause tsunamis? She was very clear that there is no such thing as earthquake weather and earthquakes do not only happen in the early morning, which was demonstrated perfectly on Friday evening.

So, I hope that you get a little extra cash next time you are at the ATM and stash some extra water and non-perishable food in case of an emergency. Oh, by the way, Lucy said you should be sure that stored food and water are in an easy-to-access place, where they aren’t likely to be hidden in case of an earthquake.

Thank you, Lucy, for making earthquakes more manageable.

Karen

Like anyone who exercises regularly, or walks or runs a lot, I am in the habit of getting new workout shoes every four to five months. I work out about five or six days a week. Most days I spend time on the treadmill. So, I have learned to keep an eye on how my shoes are wearing.

But six months ago, I started working with a strength coach (he hates being referred to as a “trainer”). Twice a week, I meet him at my gym for an hour of weight lifting and strength conditioning. A few months ago, Yas (that’s his name) mentioned to me that I need to get thinner-soled trainers. In case you didn’t know, in England, they call workout shoes “trainers”; many Americans call them “tennis shoes.” Yas is from England, so in his distinct and sometimes difficult-to-understand British accent, he finally convinced me to get new trainers, based on his recommendation.

Yas had noticed during my exercise sessions that I was a bit unstable on my feet. He told me that the cushiony soles of my Adidas, Nikes and Brooks shoes are all thick and that can make my ankles a bit weak and wobbly. Interestingly, in speaking to friends, they, like me, thought it was good to have these thickly soled shoes. Something about the cushion being good for you. The cushion might feel good, but it raises your center of gravity enough that we compensate by wobbling.

So Yas sent me a link to a shoe brand called Merrell. I believe Merrell is best known for hiking shoes. But Yas recommended the Vapor Glove model for me. These shoes have very little padding. The toe box is broad and they have serious arch support. I actually feel more like I am walking barefoot. My feet are definitely closer to the ground.

Yas also told me to walk barefooted at home as it activate the muscles in my feet and will train them to work harder at stabilizing me.

So, two weeks ago, I wore my new Merrell Vapor Glove shoes to my workout. I could not believe the difference in my stability. He has me do some rather complicated strength-building exercises for my hamstrings and the improvement in the number of reps I was able to do and how much stronger I felt was palpable.

As we get older, we are concerned about building muscle mass and bone strength. The last thing we want to happen is to lose our footing, fall down and hit our knee (which I did twice last year) or break a bone (thank goodness that has not happened to me). I never knew that there were other styles of workout shoes that actually HELPED create more stability when I exercise or walk.

If you have experienced any of the wobbling or instability when you run, walk or exercise, I suggest you try this style of shoe. And don’t forget to walk barefoot every day. Who knew this could help with balance?

Karen

Although I’ve never had serious or ongoing insomnia, there are definitely nights when I have a hard time going to sleep. Or I wake up at 1 or 2 a.m. and cannot go back to sleep. I have many friends who complain about the same thing.

So, when two of my coworkers got some insights on getting better sleep, I was very interested.

They had gone to see a healer. I don’t know what kind of healer, but I am guessing it was someone spiritual, homeopathic or something along those lines. Anyway, I was fascinated about what they shared with me.

As they were finishing their session, the healer turned to one of my coworkers and asked, “So, do you have problems sleeping?” She was caught off guard because she had not mentioned anything to him about her constant restlessness at night. She often complained that it was hard for her to get a good, solid night’s sleep.

He then asked her, “Do you have any crystals or books in your bedroom?” She nodded yes and pointed to the necklace that her boyfriend gave her. It contains a crystal. She never takes it off. Plus, her bedroom is filled with many full bookshelves and she has several crystals hanging on her walls and sitting on her nightstand.

The healer suggested she remove all crystals and books from her bedroom. He told her that the energy of the crystals and the words in the books were interrupting her sleep.

She wasn’t quite sure about all of this, but went home and removed all the crystals and books anyway. That very first night, she had one of the best, uninterrupted, full night of sleep she’d had in a long time. Later that week, she forgot to take off her crystal necklace, and guess what? She did not sleep very well that night.

As she told me all this, I found it interesting. Not very scientific, but interesting.

So, just for the heck of it, when I got home that night, I removed all the crystals from my bedroom, took the books off my nightstand and moved them into another room. Then I went to bed.

Seriously, I had one of the best night’s sleep! And I’ve noticed in the last few weeks that my sleep has continued to be more restful. I am also able to fall asleep quickly. Of course, when I go to bed with a lot on my mind from work, I occasionally wake up super early, but I figure that is my subconscious telling me to get to work early that day. I actually embrace that when it happens and don’t stay in bed. I get up and read, write or do work.

After I had experienced this crystal- and book-free sleep, I mentioned it to a couple friends who have insomnia issues. One friend is a recent widow and good, restful sleep has been a real issue. I suggested she try this new technique: Remove all crystals, books and photos of her spouse and family from her bedroom to see if her sleep would get better. I added the photos to the list, as it made sense to me that having your former spouse or family members staring at you all night might be equally disruptive to sleep.

I haven’t heard back from her yet, but I am hopeful that these changes help her.

If you have challenges with poor quality sleep and you’ve tried all the other normal suggestions (no coffee after noon, keeping your room cold, not using any devices an hour before you go to sleep), perhaps you might want to clear a few things from your bedroom.

I would love to hear if this allows you to have more restful sleep.

Sleep well!

Karen

Last week, I got to spend an hour touring one of the most dynamic and regenerative organic walnut farms in California. It’s in Winters, California, just outside Sacramento.

I was in the area for a meeting at the University of California, Davis, and my dear friend Craig McNamara invited me to come by to see his organic walnut ranch and Center for Land-Based Learning, his pet project and legacy.

I literally had 45 minutes to spend with him, as I had a flight to catch that evening. So as soon as I arrived at the ranch, we jumped into an all-electric ATV and did the fastest tour I’ve ever had of a farm.

If the name McNamara sounds familiar to you, it’s because Craig is the son of the late Robert S. McNamara, the eighth U.S. secretary of defense, who served from 1961 to 1968 under Presidents John F. Kennedy and Lyndon B. Johnson. He played a major role in escalating the United States’ involvement in the Vietnam War.

I had recently learned of that personal connection, so in the most diplomatic way I could, I asked Craig about his dad (whose name is inextricably associated with that war) and how Craig ended up as a farmer in Winters, since he grew up in Washington, D.C. You can read more about Craig and his dad in this article.

Craig shared with me that due to his father’s connection to the war and the personal burden Craig felt, he dropped out of Stanford University in protest and fled the country. He rode a motorcycle 6,000 miles to Colombia, then hitchhiked another 6,000 miles to Tierra del Fuego (the southernmost point on the continent). He ended up living on the land of peasant farmers in Mexico, Ecuador and Chile, and worked side by side with them, growing food. Craig realized working on the land was helping him heal. He returned to UC Davis and earned a degree in Plant and Soil Science. He met the love of his life and now wife, Julie, and they bought a small farm in Winters.

When they bought the farm, the best part was a cute house, which they still live in. But the ground was in terrible condition. During his time working with farmers in South America, he had learned to cultivate the land organically and applied that to his new business. He eventually created three enterprises.

First is Sierra Orchards, at 450 acres, producing mostly organic walnuts and olives for olive oil.

Second is the Center for Land-Based Learning, Craig’s passion project. Its mission is to inspire, educate and cultivate future generations of farmers, agricultural leaders and natural resources stewards. The center trains more than 2,000 people annually on sustainable farming practices, so they can go back to their communities and farm.

And third is the creation of the California Farm Academy (CFA) that trains 24 beginners each year, preparing them to be the next generation of California farmers. Graduates of CFA share incubator plots on 15 acres of Craig’s land, selling their produce to restaurants across the Bay Area and Sacramento. They are also part of the Farm to Table movement and have started many urban farms.

Craig proudly standing in front of the 15 acre incubator farm.

After the tour, Craig took me into his small office to give me a couple of bottles of his special olive oil. I spotted a photo of Craig and his dad, Secretary McNamara. With permission, I snapped this photo.

Craig and his dad Robert McNamara.

While driving to the Sacramento airport, weaving through the countryside on a one-lane road, I just couldn’t turn on the radio. I had too many thoughts going through my mind about the burdens Craig carried regarding his father’s legacy. And how Craig was able to move past those to become a farmer and entrepreneur. Interestingly, he leveraged his own leadership skills to get appointed to the California State Board of Food and Agriculture (he served for 17 years, the last seven as president). That means he was a key advisor to California’s governor and secretary of agriculture.

My final thought as I arrived at the airport was of Putah Creek flowing through his farm. Craig and I, in his ATV, roughed it through a few fields, so that he could show me the work he and his crew had done to restore Putah Creek. It’s a tributary of the Sacramento River. The 85-mile creek has its headwaters in the Mayacamas Mountains, a part of the Coast Ranges, and flows east through two dams, including a section on Craig’s farm. He showed me how, over many years, they were able to install large boulders and create an aerated section of the creek, which is now home to thousands of salmon that swim upstream each season.

The circle of life is so amazing to me. In 45 minutes, Craig shared the most intimate details of his life with me, and how he finally healed his wounds from memories of his father’s life by becoming a farmer. An organic farmer and teacher. And yet, part of Craig’s legacy will be that he served in our own state government, as a leader and influencer for generations to come.

It’s interesting how even when we resist being like our parents and want to follow our own path, we eventually find that our parents were perfect for us. It was our parents’ choices and actions that helped make us who we are today.

Karen

The restored Putah Creek on Craig’s farm.

My discovery about the celery juice phenomenon started about two months ago, when I was vacationing in Barcelona, Spain. I took a day trip to visit some grower friends in Murcia, Spain. As we were walking their celery field, my host said, “Can you believe that celery market? We got a call from a U.S. celery grower friend of ours this morning commenting on how crazy the celery market has gotten.” (Translation: The prices and demand for celery are both very high.)

I didn’t give it a second thought.

Then, about two weeks ago, I happened to pick up a copy of the Long Beach Business Journal and read an interview of the CEO of a local company. I was so inspired by his comments that I wrote him a personal note. A few days later, I received an email from him, thanking me for sending him the article. He closed his email by saying, “Frieda’s looks like a great operation and given the boom in wellness awareness, should be well positioned for growth. Drinking my 20 oz. of celery juice as I type this…”

Half–joking, I just had to write back and ask, “I wonder what’s up with the celery juice trend, anyway?”

My new pen pal, David, wrote back: “It has a lot to do with the awareness of Anthony William – Medical Medium…”

So I googled the Medical Medium, saw he wrote a book on Celery Juicing, but ultimately after a few minutes, I turned back to my work.

And then, last Thursday, I was up in Salinas attending the retirement party for an industry friend and I ran into one of the U.S. largest vegetable growers, David Gill. David looked fantastic! I mean, his eyes were clear, his skin looked great, and he actually looked younger. So, I ask him, “What are you doing these days? You look great.”

You aren’t going to believe what he told me: “I’ve been drinking 16 oz. of celery juice every morning for the last 6 weeks!” Seriously? I asked him what inspired him to do that. He said, “Well, I am a large celery grower, and someone told me about the health benefits of celery juice, so I figured I should try it. After all, I know where to get fresh celery!”

So I literally came home this weekend and went online to do my research. I ordered a copy of his book Medical Medium Celery Juice.

Thanks to Amazon Prime, it arrived on Sunday morning, and I quickly thumbed through the first few chapters of the book. The more I read, the more I thought: drinking 16 oz. of celery juice first thing every morning can’t be bad. So off I went to buy a juicer and a few large heads of organic celery.

In concept, Anthony William professes that drinking 16 oz. of freshly juiced celery each morning, on an empty stomach, acts a bit like a detox. He tells you not to have anything else to eat or drink for 30 minutes (so my morning coffee just has to wait).

Of course, in his book, he lists a variety of conditions that the celery juice will help minimize.

So, if you’re wondering why there seems to be a shortage of celery bunches at your favorite grocery store, part of the reason is because juicing-obsessed consumers nationwide are literally buying up everything they can get! Plus, grower David Gill did disclose that there have been some growing and weather challenges with celery, which has also limited supplies. It’s a bit of a perfect storm of celery demand.

If you’re one of those millions of consumers who are drinking celery juice each morning, I’d love to hear from you!

And if you just can’t fathom the flavor of celery juice first thing in the morning, you’ll be amused to know my daughter Sophia texted me this morning, “I don’t know what I expected celery juice to taste like, but it’s gross.”

Yes, I recruited her to join me on my celery juice journey.

Karen

Okay, let me start by saying: When you are into healthy eating or at least want to make healthier choices, you are always reading food labels. It’s shocking to see what “stuff” gets put into food to make it taste good. It’s usually excessive sodium, high-fructose corn syrup, and other things I cannot pronounce or spell.

So, when I was at a produce trade show last year and saw this new snack food Peatos, I was intrigued.

And, they were delicious. I thought: Clever! A “healthy” alternative to Cheetos. And that was it. I saw them at my local supermarket and occasionally bought them. And since I went vegan, I have been delighted by their “Fiery Hot” flavor product.

End of story.

Then, I was reviewing the guest list for a CEO Summit I was attending the day before the Berkshire Hathaway Annual Shareholders Meeting in Omaha, Nebraska, on May 3. There on the list was the name Nick Desai, CEO of Snack It Forward LLC, World Peas Brand, i.e., the creator of Peatos. My favorite snack.

OMG. OMG. OMG.

I put Nick’s name on my short list of people to be sure and meet. And when I got to the meeting, the orange Peatos logo on his white shirt (and the shirts of his two young daughters along with him) made him easy to identify. (We produce people tend to wear our logo shirts everywhere… Shameless promotion.)

Nick and I immediately struck up a conversation at the break.

I asked him how the heck he started the company. He told me he was in the investment banking world and decided it was too stressful, so in 2007 he decided he wanted to get into real business and found the opportunity to buy the company Snack It Forward. We both laughed about it being a tossup of which is more stressful: investment banking or owning your own (food) company.

Fast forward to 2018. Nick got rid of his manufacturing plant and stopped selling the licensed Sunkist trail mixes his company was known for.

Being of Indian descent, and being raised in a vegetarian lifestyle, he was perplexed why American vegetarian snacks weren’t made of pulses (beans, lentils, fava beans, etc.). They are a great source of protein, and he noticed that most snack foods in the U.S. were mostly carbs and fat. So, he developed a pulse-based snack that resembled the craveable Cheetos snack.

We talked about the challenges of attending trade shows, doing sampling, getting co-packers, signing confidentiality agreements with manufacturers, pursuing retail clients, getting that first big sale and then the 24/7 nature of the food business.

We both love it! And because he brought his two daughters with him, we developed a more personal connection about the realities of balancing work/family. I’m guessing his wife was enjoying some downtime back in SoCal.

I was intrigued and full of admiration that Nick was able to transform his life and his company by looking back at his roots. His family is from India, and his wife is vegetarian. He’s a smart business guy, but he wanted a change that was more real to him.

So, thank you, Nick, for taking the plunge into healthier snack foods. I’m grateful that his first retail customer was Kroger, and from what he told me, his line of Peatos is available nationwide in all Kroger stores in the produce department. He also told me that I could purchase Peatos on Amazon… But that’s another story.

#UNJUNKYOURSNACK

Karen

I bet you have both the Uber and the Lyft apps on your smartphone. And when you go out of town, you might no longer feel like you need to rent a car, because you can just take an Uber from the airport to your hotel. And from your hotel to business meetings, dinner events and more.

And when you are at home, if you are going out after work, or out for a nice dinner, and plan to drink alcoholic beverages, you might no longer worry about one person being the DD, the designated driver. You will just Uber to/from your evening venue. No more worries about getting a DUI.

A few years ago, I wrote about how my 95-year-old mother discovered Go Go Grandparent, an add-on service from Lyft, which allows those without smart phones to call and get the same ride-sharing service. You can read about it here. It’s been a game changer for my mom, because it allows her to have the same freedom to come and go, even though she no longer drives. (If you have parents, grandparents or friends who should not drive, I highly recommend you check this service out.)

And of course, we’ve all heard about Uber Eats, which you can use to get delivery of prepared food.

But this weekend, I learned of yet another new use for Uber/Lyft that is saving companies hundreds of thousands of dollars a year.

My sister Jackie told me that during her travels, she has noticed that many hotels no longer have vans that offer airport pickup. Instead, if you have an overnight reservation, the hotel will call you an Uber, which will pick you up at the airport and take you to your hotel. Paid for by the hotel! Hotels have found that they not only save the cost of owning and maintaining an airport van, but they no longer have to tie up an employee to drive back and forth in the van. With the labor shortage that many cities experience, they can use that person at the hotel.

And in fact, the same thing is happening at car dealerships. When you drop off your car for service, many dealerships have a van which will deliver you back to your home or office, saving you the cost of renting a car. Here in SoCal, I’ve just learned that some car dealerships are offering an Uber or Lyft ride back to your work. On them!

I even met a business consultant who lives up in West Los Angeles. He proudly told me a few years ago he sold his car. And he now takes an Uber to all of his business meetings. He said, in addition to saving the cost of maintaining and fueling a vehicle, he now can use the travel time between meetings to work, make phone calls, etc. In a place like LA, where traffic comes in many shades of nightmare, the thought of being able to make your travel time productive sounds like heaven to me.

Talking about benefitting from the gig economy?! Next time you are planning an evening out, attending a meeting during peak traffic times or when you’re too exhausted to drive…think about a different way of getting to your destination.

Karen

First, let me start by saying I have not, nor will I ever think about, hiking the Pacific Crest Trail. The Pacific Crest Trail is 2,650 miles long, spans from Mexico to Canada, across two mountain ranges, and yes, there are people who actually walk the entire length of it.

And, I am proud and amazed to share that my nephew, Frankie Wiggins (my sister Jackie’s son) hiked the entire PCT last year. He departed in mid-April and finished his epic 142-day journey on September 15. Frankie has a degree in Mechanical Engineering (from Cal Poly SLO), and I think the analytical and problem-solving skills he learned in college were honed and perfected on the PCT. He planned out, on a day-by-day basis, just how long he would hike each day, where he would get water, how much his pack would weigh during different portions of the trip, plus dozens of more calculations and incredibly detailed items. Think of your most detailed excel spreadsheet or Gantt chart, on steroids.

Fortunately, my sister posted updates periodically on Facebook, so we knew he was alive! Here is a photo of him during the course of the hike.

In case you want to know what it’s like to walk that far, you can do what I did and read the book Wild: From Lost to Found on the Pacific Crest Trail by Chery Strayed. It was coincidental that I read that book in early 2018, right before Frankie started his hike, but it sure made the trials and tribulations of such a long and lonely trek relatable to me. (BTW – the Movie, Wild, starring Reese Witherspoon is just a tease. It’s really worth it to read or listen to the entire book. And then you can find out why/how the author changed her last name to Strayed.)

Several times during Frankie’s 142-day epic journey, my sister Jackie and her husband Doug would meet up with Frankie on the trail. Once they joined him to attend a friend’s wedding, but sometimes it was just so Frankie could experience a hot shower and get new shoes. At one point, Doug met up with Frankie in a Northern California town called Downieville, in Sierra County, population 282. It’s basically in the middle of nowhere, but it has a post office that is used by many PCT hikers to send and receive mail and supply boxes.

And, Downieville is the home of The Mountain Messenger, famed as California’s Oldest Weekly Newspaper.

And I have to say, my brother-in-law Doug is obsessed with The Mountain Messenger. So obsessed in fact that he told me that he ordered a one-year subscription for me as my birthday present last October. I smiled and really didn’t know what to say. A newspaper from a town with a population of less than 300 people? Seriously, what would it possibly do for me?

Well, first I got this letter from the Editor and Publisher:

I chuckled out loud. What a great writing style and tongue-in-cheek humor.

Then I got my first paper. It’s usually six pages and a quick read. And surprisingly, I have to admit that I love it! The writers are so humorous and light-hearted, even when they are talking about politics (which they do regularly). They poke fun at everyone, whether it is the sheriff, elected state or county officials, or business owners. This week was about the first day of fishing season—I loved the story and I have never fished!

In this day and age of divisiveness, lack of tolerance and many people taking themselves too seriously, I find the light-hearted nature of this paper is sometimes the highlight of my reading week. And in case you want to see what all the fun is about, a one-year subscription for an out-of-county person is $35.00. You can send money to Mountain Messenger at P.O. Drawer A, Downieville 95936 or call Don at (530) 289-3262 with credit card in hand.

“Nothing ever happened in the past; it happened in the Now. Nothing will ever happen in the future; it will happen in the Now.”

I played that over a few times.

Source: Flickr @ I Woz Ere

Think about it. Everything happens in the now. So why worry about the past or the future? Stay in the now, and enjoy the moment. It takes away a lot of the stress.

For example, this morning, instead of stressing about my to-do list as I walked up to the office, I slowed down to notice how beautiful the morning was and that we had new plants added to our water-wise landscaping. I felt much calmer. Or when I started to get anxious about not hearing back from a contact, I refocused on what I was working on, rather than worry about getting a response as it is literally not up to me. I had almost forgotten about my earlier concern when I got that response back.

We all really should stop and smell the roses. We’ll all be a lot less stressed if we do.

Karen

Two days ago, I got a text from my sister, Jackie, who runs our company operations.

“We started the day with a major water leak in the men’s bathroom; we ended the day with a pipe breaking in the other side of the office. I checked, and I should have known, Mercury goes retrograde tomorrow.”

Mercury retrograde began July 26 and will end on August 19.

For longtime readers of this blog, you know all about my experiences with Mercury in retrograde in 2014 and 2017. Long story short, because of its orbit around the Sun is faster than ours, three or four times a year the planet appears to move backwards in the sky for about three weeks. According to astrology, Mercury is the planet of technology, equipment and communications, and when it goes into retrograde, everything seems to go out of whack.

Have you been experiencing any odd happenings within the last few days? Computers not working? Things breaking around the house? Poor communication between you and co-workers or your spouse? Contract negotiations not going well? That could be because Mercury is doing a moonwalk.

Jackie and I try to mark on our calendars when Mercury is going retrograde. During those times, we avoid computer upgrades and installing equipment, and are extra careful with communication. We have come to expect flight delays, dropped calls and miscommunication. We have learned to be more patient and forgiving when people around us are short-tempered during the following few weeks.

But what’s unique about this particular session of Mercury in retrograde is that Mars is also in retrograde! Mars is the planet of energy, action and desire. It went retrograde on June 26 and it will continue through August 27. Thankfully, it only goes retrograde about once every two years.

Now when Mars goes into retrograde, your plans may go a little haywire or your romantic life is unsatisfying and you feel like you can’t get anything done. Any time any planet goes retrograde, you might ask yourself, “How much is this going to mess up my life?” Well, with both Mars and Mercury in retrograde, the answer is “moderately to intensely.”

If you are curious at all about how the cosmic vibes affect you, I’d encourage you to see how these two retrogrades are affecting your astrological sign at the moment. And if you think the whole thing is hooey, that’s ok too. I’m not going to disagree with you while Mercury and Mars are in retrograde.

During this period of great tension all over the planet, perhaps it’s a good time to take deep breaths before reacting. To anything.

Oh, and my text back to my sister was:

“No surprises there. And Mom had a water leak at her house today too! Things happen in threes, right?”

Karen

Ever wonder what it takes to launch an app? Or what the inspiration is for someone’s idea for an app?

Well, I got to hear firsthand how it all happened when I was attending my sister Jackie’s birthday party last month.

I was seated next to Conrad, a friend of Jackie’s from Texas, and he enthusiastically told me about an app he launched just three days earlier. It’s called Wait Check.

The Inspiration

Conrad and his girlfriend went to their favorite nightclub in Austin, hungry and ready to boogie. But the club was at capacity, and they had to stand in line, 30 people deep. They would only let people in as people left. In his low blood sugar state of hunger, he fantasized about an app that would have allowed him to check with people already at the club or in line to see how long the wait was.

His girlfriend responded, “Great Idea! Now just pitch it to someone you know personally, trust with your idea, and who has the entrepreneurial skills to make it materialize!”

The Trusted Partner

Conrad knew immediately whom to ask: his friend Javier, a local successful businessperson. Javier was on board as he related to the frustration of waiting at restaurants and saw how an app would be the simple solution. They agreed that to meet the market’s need the app should focus on restaurant wait times, but include nightclubs’ too. It would be real-time and exclusively customer crowdsourced. It would be like “WAZE for GRAZE.” Let’s outsmart restaurant traffic together!

This is what Javier shared with me about his thought process:

“When Conrad approached me with the original idea, I thought it had some merit. But I thought that app would only be useful for the segment of people who regularly go to clubs. If we expanded the app to focus on restaurants, we would have a much broader audience. And if we could send those people a push notification once they entered a restaurant, we could prompt them to share wait times with other users.

“So I did some research to see if there were any other restaurant wait time apps on the market, and there were some but none that worked very well. Most of the existing apps are subscription-based and require member restaurants to enter wait times. The primary problem with that model is that very few restaurants participate and the information is not always accurate or in real time. None of them crowdsource for the actual wait time. So for various reasons, people really don’t seem to be using those apps. If we could also design a simple user interface and an app that was easy to use, we thought we might have a winner.”

Search for Developer

Javier set up meetings with three different app development companies in Austin.

App Company No. 1 had a lot of impressive terminologies and a slick presentation, but with a ridiculous price tag that would have to be doubled for each Apple and Android platform.

App Company No. 2 was super exciting because the owner/developer really listened to their concept and even added to it by suggesting estimated wait times based on existing Google datasets. Also, the developer loved the idea so much he said he was interested in developing the app for a stake in the business!

App Company No. 3 was full of vague, opaque explanations with nothing concrete to back up claims.

Surprise! They chose the second company.

Concept to Beta

Conrad got the idea in June 2017 and spoke to Javier within the week. After selecting the developer, they were able to do beta testing in March 2018 and did a soft launch on June 6, 2018—just last month!

My Takeaways

Of course, I’ve downloaded the app and started using it! But I’ve learned so much more than just finding out about a nifty app:

Your original idea may not end up being your final idea, as it is important to brainstorm with others to figure out what the real need is and how big the market is.
The idea person (right-brained) should not be afraid to partner up with someone with business experience (left-brained). Someone who runs a business probably knows the ins and outs of contracts, negotiations, and strategy, a complement to the idea person.
It takes a while to go from idea to launch. It’s always better to take time to beta test (even if the idea isn’t technology-based) and work out the bugs. That’s why so many companies do “pilot tests” or market research. When you think you have a fantastic idea and want to launch it right away so you don’t miss the opportunity, a year can seem like a long time. Over 90 percent of new products fail, so testing is useful.

I want to say, “And the rest is history,” but we’re not quite there yet! I know Conrad and Javier are doing marketing and figuring out ways to monetize their app. They would love your feedback. Feel free to reach out to them at info@waitcheck.com.

Karen

Ask for what you want: That’s one of my favorite pieces of business advice. In fact, I use it often when I give speeches or mentor people. It actually applies to your business life and to your personal life.

Just last week, I was on the phone with a colleague who works at a local university. We were brainstorming ideas to get younger alumnae involved in the dean’s advisory council. So I suggested that we ask for what we want.

In the quarterly university magazine, why not run an ad?

Are you an alumnae? Are you under 50? Is your area of interest agriculture, fashion, or architecture? The Dean’s Advisory Council would love to talk with you about joining us.

My colleague’s comment was: Wow, I never thought of asking directly for what we want.

How many times when you deal with a vendor or a customer (or in your personal life, with your significant other) do you hope they’ve taken that “mind-reading” class? I mean, you know what you want, but you hesitate to ask directly for it. Or actually, you never even think of asking directly for it.

I’ve used this piece of advice so many times that it’s not unusual for me to get an email from someone that starts with: “I know you believe in asking for what you want…”

And if you’re on the other side of this conversation, it’s kind of refreshing to have someone ask you directly for what they want, instead of wondering where the conversation is going.

Another approach I often use is: “It never hurts to ask.” This is a great one to use when you want to try something new.

For example, in business, perhaps you are thinking about asking for a price increase, free samples, or a special discount. The last time I used this was when I was at a local running store. It advertised a 15 percent discount on shoes. After I selected a pair to buy, I happened to comment on the Garmin watch the sales rep was wearing. It turned out it had the features I was looking for. He told me the price.

And then, I asked for what I wanted: “So, do I get the same 15 percent discount that I am getting on the shoes?” He told me “no,” the discount didn’t apply to that.

And then I asked, “Well, do you think I can get the friends and family discount?”

Well, guess what? He gave me a 10 percent discount!

If you think this doesn’t apply to you or would never work, I’d also like to remind you about the time I asked my friend about going to the Berkshire Hathaway’s annual shareholders’ meeting, which I did get to attend. And when I asked another friend about becoming a director of the Federal Reserve Bank, which I did become in 2005.

Remember, not only should you ask for what you want, but you should be mindful that it never hurts to ask!

Now, you all know about my bucket list item of meeting Nike founder Phil Knight…

Karen

I think we all know that when we pull an all-nighter or don’t get sufficient sleep (fewer than five hours), our performance and decision making the next day are not up to par. Some of us walk around feeling tired pretty much all the time, while saying, “I can sleep when I’m dead.” Well, lack of sleep is more harmful to your health than the day-to-day results.

Three years ago, I learned about the link between getting enough sleep and the onset of Alzheimer’s disease during a meeting at the University of California, Irvine. The presentation highlighted the work being done at UCI MIND: Institute for Memory Impairments and Neurological Disorders.

UCI Mind is doing research which involves testing and monitoring people of all ages to see how their memory changes over time. This extensive research maps the participants’ brains and brain functions.

In one of the presentations, a doctor who is doing the primary research told us it is important that people get at least seven and a half to eight hours of sleep each night. Why that number? That is the amount of time it takes for the human brain to “clean out” amyloid plaques. In lay terms, amyloid plaques are goopy stuff in the crevices of our brains. When we go to sleep, our bodies naturally clean out all the goopy stuff, effectively clearing the toxins from our brains. And that takes about seven and a half to eight hours of uninterrupted sleep. If we do not get enough sleep to complete the “cleansing cycle,” then the goopy toxin remains. And it is that buildup of amyloid plaques that causes the symptoms of Alzheimer’s and dementia.

Click to read more about how our brains “self-clean” during sleep every night.

So you can imagine what I did immediately after I listened to that doctor.

Yep, I decided to begin monitoring my sleep. I started going to sleep earlier each night. Early enough that it allowed me to set my alarm for eight hours after I went to bed.

It was an adjustment. No more late nights watching television. I put on my orange sleep glasses, do my reading, and get a good night’s sleep. I moved many of my early morning meetings back an hour or two, so I could complete my sleep cycle.

And you know what happened? I started feeling better, sharper when I first woke up, and I had more consistent energy all day long.

When I was younger, it was always fun to brag about how I burned the candle at both ends. I would stay up late and get up early. Sometimes I would exist on three to four hours of sleep. If you’re one of those people who almost wears as a badge of honor how little sleep you can function on, I would encourage you to read this.

It is doubtful that adequate sleep will eliminate the chance of memory issues. There are many other factors like genetics and inflammation in your body. (I will share some insights on this in a future post.) But the number of hours of sleep you get is 100 percent within your control. I encourage you to start monitoring your sleep. Go to bed earlier and feel better.

Good night!

Karen

I attend a lot of events each year. Big events. Small events. Events in an auditorium. Events in a classroom setting. Events with a keynote during a meal. And I’ve seen a lot of masters of ceremonies, moderators, panelists, and speakers. All with different speaking styles and public-speaking skills.

Nothing drives me crazier than speakers who are ill-prepared. And I don’t mean just scrambling to get their speech together at the last minute. I’m talking about people who know they have to give a speech and yet do not put in the work to learn anything about public speaking.

You know the signs. Mumbling. Speaking softly. Monotonous. Rushing through things. A lot of “ums.” Reading the notes instead of speaking. Not making eye contact with the audience. Using jargon not familiar to the audience.

Not doing your homework about your audience, not practicing beforehand, or just plain ol’ not learning how to publicly speak before your speech: To me that is an ill-prepared speaker.

I would like to offer what I’ve learned over the years, as both a trained speaker and a member of the audience, on how to get the most bang for your buck at your next speaking opportunity.

Me speaking at Bitten LA conference

Nail down the time

Pro tip: It’s never “as long as you want,” even if that’s what they tell you. Ask the organizer differently: “What’s the optimum amount of time? Five minutes? Fifteen minutes? How long did your best speaker ever talk?”

Know your audience

Get clear on your topic and who the audience will be. Are they C-level executives? What is their job function: buying, selling, HR? Is it a mixed group? Maybe you’re there to speak as a sponsor of the event. If you talk about your new product, does that even apply to your audience? Is anyone present the decision maker on buying your product?

Practice, practice, practice!

First, outline what you are going to talk about, then fill in the blanks. Time yourself while saying it out loud, preferably in front of a mirror, multiple times. If you are given 15 minutes, don’t ramble on for 20 minutes. Edit your remarks until you are a little under your time limit.

You can use your notes while you practice. I type out every single one of my speeches, no matter how short it may be. I use at least a 14-point type, triple spaced, and I number the pages. These steps make it much easier to rehearse and give my speech. When you have that down, practice in front of a few people and get their feedback.

Slow down, pause, and breathe

Speak more slowly than your normal speed. You may think you’re not going that fast, but in public speaking, you probably are. Slow it down so your audience can absorb what you are talking about.

Also, pauses are not a bad thing. Don’t feel the need to fill the silence. Take a beat at the end of sentences and breathe. Not only does it calm your nerves, but it gives the audience a moment to catch up and pay attention as well.

Don’t skip the sound check

Get to the venue early to do sound and technical checks before guests start arriving. That’s when you stand at the podium you are going to be presenting from and adjust the microphone so you can be heard. Get the host or a coworker to stand in the back of the room to verify that you are loud and clear. If you’re using a PowerPoint presentation, make sure you run through every slide.

Smile and stick to your script

Give the presentation or remarks that you rehearsed. Don’t ad lib! You got this.

Take a few deep breaths before you begin, find someone in the audience to make eye contact with, and smile. Smiling at your audience will make the audience smile back at you, and you can connect with them that much more.

Follow these steps, and you’ll get compliments on your presentation, and reduce the number of people texting or reading their emails during it!

I didn’t make up all these pointers on my own. Early in my career, I met the late Judith Learner, a former newscaster from Milwaukee and a professional speaking coach. I hired her to work with me for over a year. She videotaped me multiple times while giving presentations and I had to watch myself during the playback. Nothing breaks you of bad habits—flipping your hair, adjusting your shoulders, filling the silence with “ums”—better than seeing yourself on camera! Plus, I had a professional right there pointing out every one of my flaws and opportunities to be more polished.

I used to get so nervous before I gave a speech. Now, I actually look forward to it, thanks to Judith for having been a great teacher and mentor.

I hope that my pointers can help you the way Judith helped me. I’d love to hear whether these suggestions help you with your next speech. Good luck!

Karen

So, the first question is: Who needs business cards? The second is: When should you carry your business cards with you?

The answers are: everyone and everywhere.

Two groups of people look at me cross-eyed when I say this—students and the recently retired. So I have a few recommendations for both.

Students: If you are looking for a job or an internship, how is your potential employer going to get your contact information so they can offer you a job if you don’t have a business card? They are not going to write it down. And they may not want you to text it to them as that would mean giving you their cell phone number.

Recently retired: It cracks me up when I ask you for your business card, and you look at me like I’m crazy, and say, “But I‘m retired. I don’t need a business card.” How are people going to reach you? We don’t have your personal cell phone number or email address because we’ve only used your work contact info, even though we’ve become personal friends.

Both of you: Order yourself a stack of business cards. Vista Print has business cards for just $10. You can also pop by your local office supply store or even Costco. (Students: If you want something with more creative flare, try Moo.)

Make sure the font is easy to read. Include your cell phone number and email address. Students don’t need to include a mailing address, but the recently retired should.

And both groups need to have a respectable Gmail address like firstname.lastname@gmail.com or something that matches your professional personal brand. You can have that email address forwarded to your current, not so professional, email address if you don’t want to give up your old accounts. (Students: Definitely let go of your SoccerSux@hotmail.com or QTPie1994@CableProvider.com type of email addresses.)

Another email address option is a forwarding address offered by your college. Many offer one free so you can put yournamehere@alumni.yourcollege.com on your card with pride.

And, yes, take your business cards everywhere.

I cannot tell you how many times in the last month I have been at a social event, or even a work event, and I’ve met someone I want to be in touch with. You wouldn’t believe how often I’ve heard: “Oh, crap. I don’t have my business cards on me!” So I give them my card and they promise to send me their contact information, which they do about 50 percent of the time.

Just imagine: You are at a social event and you meet someone who would be a great contact for your next career move, for your business network, or who could support a charity that you love. And, oops, you don’t have any business cards on you. How disappointed would you be to miss that connection?

I always have at least three to four business cards in my wallet and in just about every bag I use—even a tiny evening clutch. Keep a few in your cell phone case. Leave some in your car. These cards have never failed to come in handy. You never know when you will meet someone interesting!

Next time you are getting ready to leave your house for anything, even a grocery run, check your wallet for business cards. You will thank me later.

Karen

About four years ago, I stopped watching the nightly news.

It seemed like no matter what channel I turned on, the only news was about the floods, the fires, the murders, corruption, and bad behaviors. It was just so depressing.

And the news magazines and papers I used to pick up at airports when I traveled weren’t much better.

While still keeping up with daily news briefs, I started reading more books, listening to most of them on Audible, and I still subscribe to a few magazines that keep me current on innovation and thought leadership.

Once in a while, on a whim, I pick up a few new magazines during my travels. They provide a bit of balance to my “always reading work publications” credo. This time around, I ended up subscribing to O, The Oprah Magazine.

The June issue arrived with the headline, “Are you ready for some good news?” I was intrigued enough to turn the pages.

The opening paragraph really got my attention because it felt like the author was in my head.

“If you’re feeling like the world is tilting on its axis, like the center cannot hold, like this country is hell-bound in the proverbial handbasket, you’re not alone.

But is it possible that reports of our impending doom have been greatly exaggerated? Why, yes it is!

In the interest of helping you sleep better tonight, we’re about to debunk a few of your most urgent worries…and give you…hope.”

Some of the issues explored in the multi-page article:

“We can’t possibly remedy climate change.”
“Young people don’t care about anything but Instagram likes.”
“America’s cities are crime-ridden cesspools.”
“Science is under attack.”
“Old white guys will always be in charge.”
“Screen time is making us dumb.”
“Russia has infiltrated the U.S. – and is going to take us down.”
“Every day it’s nothing but bad news.”

Yep, that pretty much sums up many of the things on my mind, and on the minds of many people. But to my delight and surprise, the information I read shed a positive and hopeful light on every one of those subjects.

What would happen if more networks, newspapers, and publications spent more time talking about how we can fix things, or make positive change, vs. fearmongering, or telling us about all the terrible things going on?

If they don’t or won’t change, then we have to find publications or media that will do that, and stop supporting the ones that won’t.

If you want to read about and hear good news, you can find it, but you may have to look in new places.

And that’s the positive change I chose to make. Many others have as well, which is probably why so many people are sharing positive messages on social media.

Positive messages make us feel good. They make us do good. And they promote more kindness in the world.

Let’s do more of that.

Karen

Like everyone in America, I was deeply shocked, saddened, and devastated last Friday to hear the news that there was yet another shooting at a school. This time in Santa Fe, Texas, where 10 students were gunned down and 13 more were injured.

The news took the wind out of me. I don’t know about you, but I felt helpless.

Two days later, with the shooting still fresh in my mind, I attended the annual Women Against Gun Violence luncheon, just as I have for almost 20 years. Founded by my friend Ann Reiss Lane, a former commissioner of the Los Angeles Police Department, WAGV was celebrating its 25^th anniversary at this event.

As she tells it, Ann was inspired to start WAGV while serving as a police commissioner after she received a call from feminist Betty Friedan, asking, “What are YOU going to do about the NRA’s campaign to sell guns to women?”

In response to Betty’s call, Ann and a few of her L.A. friends gathered acquaintances, family members and others for a three-day conference to examine the sale of guns to women, and so much more. They ended up starting WAGV to reduce gun violence in Southern California.

These luncheons are always filled with surprises and inspiration. I remember the WAGV luncheon I attended when then L.A. Police Chief Bernard Parks got up to tell the story that every time someone was killed in Los Angeles while he was chief, he got a personal phone call. One morning his phone rang. He told us what it was like to learn that a very young girl had been shot and killed. That young girl was his granddaughter.

At this year’s luncheon, I was surprised to see a 9-year-old girl go up to the stage with her father.

Her name is Madison Rude.

Madison takes the stage

Madison told the story of when she and her dad, Steven, were at Barnes & Noble bookstore a few months ago. Passing by the magazine rack, she noticed more than 20 magazines promoting guns, photos of guns, guns sales, etc. She asked her dad why Barnes & Noble was selling gun-oriented magazines and displaying them at eye level where young children could see and pick them up. He didn’t have an answer.

A slide from Madison’s presentation

So they discussed it, and when they got home, Madison wrote a letter to the CEO of Barnes & Noble asking him to move the magazines. And then she waited. She never got a response. She actually called and emailed his office multiple times over the next few weeks, but never heard anything back.

But when they went back to that very same Barnes & Noble several weeks later, Madison noticed that almost all of the gun-oriented magazines had been moved to another display area out of the sight of young children. She asked the manager why the magazines were moved. The manager didn’t know.

At this point in the presentation, Madison told the audience that there were postcards at each of our tables pre-addressed to Demos Parneros, CEO of Barnes & Noble. She encouraged each of us to take one, sign our name, and mail it to Mr. Parneros.

When Madison got up in front of over 360 people at the WAGV luncheon, I was inspired and moved beyond measure. I realized instead of being scared and doing nothing, she took action and spoke up.

I think that’s called being an activist.

I’m sure that everyone in the audience that day was thinking the same thing I was. The same thing they thought when they saw Emma Gonzalez, a student at Marjory Stoneman Douglas High School in Parkland, Florida, speak at a rally following the senseless shooting at her high school.

These young people will speak up and fearlessly confront the most difficult issue with courage and conviction.

Watch out world. They’re coming to change everything.

Karen

Madison and Steven

Three weeks ago, my youngest daughter, Sophia, and I took a trip to New Zealand and Melbourne, Australia. I had a conference in Melbourne to attend May 2 to 4, so to maximize that long distance, I added about 10 days of holiday time to the trip. And it was her birthday, so it was the perfect birthday gift.

Kia Ora, Auckland!

(Kia ora means “hello” in Māori.)

We only had five days in New Zealand. The last time I was in Auckland was in 1991. The country was in a deep recession, and Auckland was quite a sleepy town. My, how times have changed! Auckland is now quite crowded, yet still very clean, and it seemed as if there was construction everywhere.

Also everywhere were these big owls! “The Big Hoot” campaign is a street art and fundraising project for New Zealand’s Child Cancer Foundation. Custom-painted owl sculptures are installed all over the city, telling unique and meaningful stories from the New Zealand community. At the end of this month, they will be displayed together one last time before being auctioned off to raise funds for the foundation.

By the way, the owl happens to be Sophia’s favorite animal!

Karen's Blog - Auckland - Sophia Jackson - Owls - The Big Hoot

After two days in the city, we were off to explore the north island. The most fun we had was our day trip to Hobbiton. If you are a fan of “The Lord of the Rings” or “The Hobbit” books and movies, then you will recognize these photos. This is the set where Lord of the Rings was filmed, about two hours southwest of Auckland. It was a rainy day, which made the place even more magical.

Karen's Blog - Sophia Jackson - New Zealand - Hobbiton

G’Day, Melbourne!

Only a four-hour puddle jump from Auckland, we landed in Melbourne, Australia. We quickly learned why Melbourne has been voted “The Most Livable City in the World” for seven straight years. The city is extremely walkable. The people are incredibly friendly. And it is refreshing that there is no tipping (gratuity), so good service is the norm!

We did a few tourist things like visit the botanical gardens and take the hop on-hop off bus around town. But my favorite thing was trying to decipher what people were saying to me.

An Australian accent is one thing, but Aussie slang is a whole other language!

After our afternoon meeting, our hostess said, “It’s time to frock up!” Frock up? Apparently, that means dress up. And then, when they were referring to other parts of the country, I heard “Tassie,” which is short for Tasmania, and “Brissie” for Brisbane.

When I got home, I did some research because I’d heard so many new words! Here are some of my favorites:

Bodgy – poor work quality or incorrectly done
Crack a Fruity – go crazy, insane, weird
Crack onto – romantically pursue someone
Goss – gossip
Stuffed – exhausted
Up yourself – have a large ego
Mozzie – mosquito
Chockers – very full
Arvo – afternoon
Ripper – really great
Sparkie – electrician
Sickie – sick day. If you take a day off work when you are not actually sick, instead of saying “playing hooky,” it’s “chucking a sickie.”

So, listen, mate. Sophia and I had a bloody good time Down Under. Our days were chockers and we didn’t get bitten by any mozzies. We were quite stuffed by the end of our 12-day trip, and I didn’t have a chance to crack onto any blokes.

Good on ya, mate!

Karen …& Koala

In my job, I travel often. Mostly cross-country, for a few days at a time. Adjusting to the time change from West Coast to East Coast is not usually a big deal. I can get by with a little less sleep and a lot more coffee during my trip.

However, when I travel out of the country, I am always a bit stressed about how I am going to adjust when I arrive at my destination, so that I’m fully functional. And then of course, I have the same concern when I return home.

A few months ago, I realized that I was going to travel to South Africa and Dubai in mid-March, then head to New Zealand and Australia in late April. On previous trips, Advil PM was my friend, and I took a pill when I boarded my flight to ensure a good, restful trip. I oftentimes took one each night I was gone to be sure I slept.

However, I’ve read lately about the negative effects of Advil/ibuprofen (non-steroidal anti-inflammatory drug or NSAID) and decided I was no longer going to take them. So, what was I going to do instead, since both these trips were certainly going to challenge my ability to adjust quickly to a 9-hour and a 19-hour time change?

I had heard that many people take melatonin to assist them in adjusting to time changes when traveling. Melatonin is a natural hormone made by the body’s pineal gland. It helps your body know when to sleep and wake up. I had taken melatonin capsules before, but they never worked for me.

But I was determined to use a natural method to assist me with my sleep management. So, off to the natural food store I went. Sitting right next to the capsules were melatonin drops. I remembered hearing that when you let drops sit under your tongue, the body absorbs the active ingredient more quickly.

So, I bought a small bottle of melatonin drops. Then I remembered my orange-tinted, blue-light blocking glasses. One of the ways to wind down at the end of the day is to wear the glasses for about an hour before bedtime. When I’ve done that, I’ve found myself getting drowsy rather quickly.

So, that’s what I packed on my first trip to South Africa. And they worked like magic. When I was ready to sleep, I put a few droppers worth of melatonin under my tongue, put on my orange-tinted glasses for about 30 minutes, and I quickly fell asleep. On my flight, I actually slept for seven hours! Each night during my stay in Capetown, I followed the same routine and I slept great the entire trip. I returned from Melbourne, Australia, this past Sunday morning feeling fully rested as I used the same routine during that trip too.

In case you’re wondering if this might work for you, I shared my routine with my co-worker Allen before he left on a business trip to Thailand. I checked with him when he returned and he was thrilled with what a difference it made in allowing him to sleep during his flights and adjust to the time change.

With so many of us exploring our bucket list by traveling around the world, I encourage you to order some orange-tinted glasses and get a bottle of melatonin drops. They will make your travels so much more enjoyable.

Bon voyage!

Karen

About four months ago, I received an email from my daughter Alex:

The son of a friend of a friend is a third-year medical student who has a one month rotation at our local Los Alamitos Hospital. Do you know of a place where he could rent a room for a month?

As I pondered the email, I thought to myself—I live by myself in a multi-bedroom home. I’ve had interns stay with me before. Should I open up my home to a complete stranger?

After all, if my child were a third-year medical student and needed a place to stay, I would think it was awesome if a friendly family offered a rent-free home to stay in.

It took me just a few minutes to decide to offer that Nathan stay at my house.

We texted a couple of times and spoke for a few minutes the weekend before he moved in. Up until that point, I had never met him in person.

What a nice guy, and what an awesome experience for both of us!

Nathan

Nathan is 25 years old and studying to be a doctor of osteopathic medicine at Western University of Health Sciences. In their third year, medical students do month-long rotations at various hospitals to experience a variety of medical fields. His first rotation while living with me was in internal medicine. He actually ended up staying another month to complete his next rotation in surgery.

I haven’t lived with anyone for a few years, so it was interesting to get up in the morning and have someone join me for coffee and breakfast.

The best part is when we meet at home in the evening and talk through our day. I find his stories about various patients interesting. During his current rotation, his descriptions of surgeries he’s witnessed intrigue me.

During the last two months, we’ve also talked about how important bedside manner is. And how you talk to a family after someone passes away (fortunately, he is quite empathetic). And how frustrating it is to work with a doctor who is ridiculously impatient and demanding.

Nathan will be moving out this weekend; I think we are both a little sad. He is paying for his entire medical education himself, so he has expressed immense gratitude for his stay at my house gratis. For me, it was a gift to spend time with a young person at the very beginning of his career, and to be reminded of the fun of having a housemate for a short period of time. (I still appreciate my solitude, which I use to breathe deeply and decompress from my daily toil.)

If you ever have the chance to host a student for a few weeks, I highly encourage it. In addition to helping them by providing a safe, clean, friendly place to stay, it is a way for you to step outside your normal schedule and circle of friends.

In August, I will be hosting up to four students for a week, while the International Maccabi Youth Games are held in Orange County! I’m excited to have the energy of students in my home again.

Karen

In the summer after my sophomore year in college, I was working on the Los Angeles Wholesale Produce Market for my mom. Early one morning, this guy came by with a group of Japanese visitors. He told me that he had a tour set up of the market, but the tour guide never showed up. So, he decided to direct the tour himself! When he came to our stall, I didn’t know who he was, so I tried to sell him some kiwifruit!

It turns out that guy, David, was a graduate student at the University of California, Davis, in the Agricultural and Resource Economics department. That was the same college I was attending in the same major.

That was the beginning of a lifelong friendship between David and me. When he graduated from UCD, it was I who drove him to the train station so he could ride the train across the country to catch a ship in New York and sail across the Atlantic to England for his post-graduation trip through Europe.

David ended up moving to Seal Beach, California, a few miles from where my parents lived, and we would occasionally have dinner together. Then he started an insurance agency and over time, he became our company’s insurance broker.

When he got married, I was at his wedding. (His wife’s name is Karen, so I would always be known as “the other Karen.”)

As we had children, our families spent Memorial Day together each year. And whenever David came to my office for our annual insurance renewal, we always went to the local Original Fish Company restaurant, often discussing politics. He was the only person I ever openly talked politics with.

A little over two years ago, David called to let me know he was diagnosed with pancreatic cancer. Ever the optimist, he told me his prognosis was good. Over the months, we checked in via phone or email for updates on his treatment.

Eight months after his diagnosis, he was ecstatic that he and his youngest son were able to attend my daughter Alex’s wedding. It seems like David was always at our family’s life-cycle events, bat mitzvahs, a wedding, fundraising dinners, birthday parties, and more.

About 10 days ago, David and I spoke on the phone. He told me “he was running out of runway” and we reminisced about our fun conversations over the years. I could tell he was in a lot of pain. When we hung up, I had tears streaming down my cheeks, as I knew that was our last conversation. And this past Saturday evening, I received a message from his family that he had passed away at age 65.

I have never experienced the death of a close friend before. So many of us will experience this more and more, so I wanted to share a few of my revelations and learnings:

Don’t be afraid to call, text, or email people when they are ill. David told me that my regular phone calls meant so much to him, that even though we were not able to see each other a lot, hearing my voice or even receiving a text or email let him know that I was thinking of him.
Share information you have with those who are ill. I was able to tell David about the Pancreatic Cancer Action Network, which a friend worked for. It allowed him to have a support group that knew exactly what he was going through.
Short visits or calls are as good as big outings. One time I stopped by David’s house and we were able to sit together and talk for about 15 minutes. It didn’t concern me at all that my drive each way was more than an hour. When someone is important to you, it really helps them to see you. Even if they tell you they don’t want to be a bother, go ahead and make that drive, or flight. It will create an amazing memory that they and you can treasure your entire life.
Write a note to the friend’s family and let them know about some of your great memories together. That note will become a treasure for the family.

I know each person reading this will experience the passing of a dear loved one in the future. We all experience death in our own way. My memories are filled with happy thoughts of our first meeting back on the Los Angeles Produce Market and our silly conversations over the years. Although tears may be running down my cheeks, my heart is happy knowing that I made the time to have that last conversation and nothing was left unsaid.

As a Jewish saying goes, may his memory be a blessing.

Karen

Last week, I had the great fortune to travel to Capetown, South Africa. I was invited to speak about marketing fresh citrus in the United States to Summer Citrus from South Africa, a collaborative of a large group of South African citrus growers, along with importers, government agencies, and a few retailers.

My total in-flight time was 24 hours, plus an eight-hour layover in Dubai. With South Africa being nine hours ahead of California and my long journey in mind, I decided to arrive a few days early to adjust to the time change and do a little sightseeing.

I went to South Africa to educate a room full of enthusiastic growers about the U.S. market. What I didn’t expect was that I would in turn be educated in so many ways about this wonderful, beautiful country. I don’t know why I waited so many years to go to South Africa!

Worth the Wait

Although South Africa always seemed like a galaxy away, I prepared myself for the long flight. With in-flight movies and a few long naps, the trip did not feel as long as I had feared. Capetown alone is worth the trip. The city is beautiful, and people are super friendly and welcoming. With 40 percent unemployment, tourism is a big part of the economy.

Capetown reminds me of the San Francisco Bay area. The most dramatic sight to see is Table Mountain, a flat-top mountain, which looks over the city.

Table Mountain

Robben Island

Capetown also has Robben Island, where people used to be incarcerated; it’s similar to San Francisco’s Alcatraz Island. The most well-known prisoner there was Nelson Mandela. I highly recommend taking the ferry ride and the two-hour tour.

Our guide Derrick

The prison tours are conducted by former prisoners. Our guide was Derrick, arrested at age 18 and released when he was 23. He is now 51. His personal story and the stories he shared of what it was like to be imprisoned there were chilling. This visit was a life-changing experience for me.

Hop on an Adventure

Getting around Capetown is easy with both the City Sightseeing bus and the MyCiti bus that you can hop on and off. It’s a great way to see a city and get the full perspective with the audio tour in your own language. I was traveling alone, so I was free to get off at any point and just explore. Got some great photos as I toured the city.

And There’s Wine!

South Africa is well-known for its wine and I did get a chance to visit a winery in the wine region, Franschhoek. Sadly, due to an oversupply of wine production, many wineries are having a difficult time, so some have now opened restaurants on their premises to attract visitors. I was able to enjoy an amazing lunch at Maison Estate.

My beautiful dessert at Maison Estate

Six hours were not enough time to enjoy Franschhoek! I would definitely recommend a day or two for that region.

What a view at Maison Estate in Franschhoek region.

On my return trip home, I was able to spend about 24 hours in Dubai. That was an experience! The airport is state of the art and the city is immaculate. The world’s tallest building is the Burj Khalifa there. At night, the way it lit up looked like Paris meets New York City!

Of course, I had to visit the wholesale produce market while in Dubai. Surprisingly, it felt familiar, though I had never been to Dubai or this market before. As we walked through it both at noon and then again at 6 p.m. (it operates almost 24 hours a day), my colleague kept warning me about the forklifts, pallet jacks, and loose produce on the floor. I told him, “Hey, I grew up on the Los Angeles Wholesale Produce Market. This feels like I am back home!”

My final meeting of the day was also at the produce market, upstairs in a well-lit office. As I looked around the room. I realized there were two Jordanians, one Englishman, and an Indian who lives in Thailand. And then there’s me, a Jewish woman from California. Yes, this feels exactly like the melting pot of Southern California.

As much as I loved my 12 days in South Africa and Dubai, it sure felt good to climb into my own bed at home in Southern California. But I have to be honest: I’m already thinking about my next trip to South Africa. Perhaps a safari?

Karen

I’ve always had a fear of hot yoga.

Over the years, I’ve had friends tell me how amazing it is to do yoga in a room with a temperature over 100 degrees. I’m pretty sure my fear came from hearing that the instructor locks the door and you cannot leave during class, even if you are overheating.

At least that’s what I recall hearing.

Actually hot yoga, sometimes known as “Bikram yoga,” isn’t only about the temperature; it’s also about humidity. In some practices, it is an attempt to duplicate India’s climate―in a controlled environment―to induce copious sweating during 26 poses.

A few weeks ago, my daughters, Sophia and Alex, took a hot yoga class together. Afterward they told me how great it was. As you know by now, I’m a tad bit competitive. So when Sophia offered to take me to a hot yoga class, I said, “of course, I’d love to” with complete confidence. I did not share my previous fears with her.

In 2017, one of my goals was to take yoga. I took a dozen or so classes, so I know what the moves are. I figured hot yoga wouldn’t be much different, just in a significantly warmer room.

As it turns out, the room is between 97 and 101 degrees, depending on the time of day and the number of people in the class. Warm, moist air is pumped into the room, encouraging you to sweat. A lot. When the room got too stuffy, the instructor did open the door briefly to let in a cool breeze from the hallway. The heat simply encourages your muscles to warm up more quickly and adds to your flexibility.

The fact is hot yoga was not as awful as I thought it would be.

Admittedly, I did get a little lightheaded during my first class. I’ve now taken three classes. And I am hooked!

I learned a lot from my hot yoga experience.

First, my expectation of the experience was not quite accurate. How often do we exaggerate something in our heads, which causes us not to experience it?

Second, I leveraged my competitive nature to force myself to try something I had avoided for decades.

And finally, that which I feared became something I like.

Are there things in your life that you have been afraid of, but once you put your toe in the water and tried them out, you found that you enjoyed?

Hot yoga is definitely on that list for me.

Thanks to my daughters, I pushed through my fear and now experience it with joy and pleasure.

Think about those things in your life that you fear. Perhaps it’s being alone or being in a relationship. Maybe it’s applying for a position that you don’t think you’re qualified for or changing careers. It even could be talking with someone or stopping an ongoing conversation. Is there someone in your life that pushes your buttons―in a good way―who might help you?

Maybe it’s time to confront your fear. I did, and I am happy I did.

Karen

On Tuesday evening, I found myself trekking into Westwood, 37 miles away from my house, through the infamous Southern California traffic, to attend a roundtable at UCLA. It was hosted by the deans of the UCLA Anderson School of Management and the USC Annenberg School for Communication and Journalism.

Was sitting in traffic for an hour and a half worth it? Absolutely.

Judy Olian, Ph.D., is dean of UCLA Anderson School, and Willow Bay is the dean of the USC Annenberg School. Even with their well-known crosstown rivalry, they came together for a noble cause: a roundtable discussion about the unique challenges faced by women entrepreneurs.

Twenty of my fellow businesswomen from Southern California and I sat around a giant conference table and listened to other great women share their stories.

Jane Wurwand founded and grew the skin-care company Dermalogica, then sold it to Unilever in 2015. Dermalogica sales in 2014 were over $240 million. Jane, a transplant from England, is now “chief visionary” for Dermalogica. She started the first and only skin-care product and service company. Her products are produced in the U.S. and made without any fillers or questionable ingredients. The company now has more than 100,000 trained skin therapists and its products are distributed in 80-plus countries around the world.
Kelsey Doorey is the CEO and founder of Vow to be Chic, the only designer bridesmaid dress rental site. It’s like Rent the Runway, but for bridesmaid dresses! A bridesmaid dress can cost a lot for something you only wear once. With her company, women can rent the costly dress for one day, just like how men rent their tuxedos.
Suzy Ryoo is partner and vice president of technology and innovation at Atom Factory and Cross Culture Ventures, where she finds, invests in, and builds alongside entrepreneurs who create next-generation companies. Over the past seven years, Atom Factory and Cross Culture have invested in nearly 100 companies including Uber, Lyft, Dropbox, Warby Parker, and Spotify. Suzy also works with Troy Carter in his role as the entertainment adviser to the Prince estate.

To put things in perspective, Suzy is 30, Kelsey is 32, and Jane is 59.

From left to right: Judy Olian, Willow Bay, Suzy Ryoo, Jane Wurwand, and Kelsey Doorey.

Kelsey and Jane talked about the challenge of explaining their business model and securing investors. Most investors are male, so getting them to understand a business that serves women almost exclusively is a challenge. Suzy educated us on what she looks for when investing, what a “cap table” is, and why she asks how many women are in one.

As I sat at the table, I watched the other 20 women take in the “new world of business talk.” Most of the women sitting with me were older than Jane. Cap tables, VCs, e-commerce marketing, deal sheets, and pitches were not in their lexicon when they started their careers. But they could see right in front of them that the exciting world of business and the world in general are changing. And both are decidedly more female.

I believe it was coincidental that this roundtable was held in March, which is National Women’s Month. And today, March 8, is International Women’s Day.

All I can say is that I was incredibly inspired to hear firsthand from women who are fearless, have a vision for success, and are paying it forward to create the new economy. It doesn’t matter if you are male or female, a mother, father, son, or daughter. We need people with fresh ideas, who are disruptive, create jobs, and help ensure the innovative and responsive business environment which will keep the U.S. growing and thriving.

It’s exciting and it’s time.

Karen

This past weekend, I participated in my second “Race on the Base,” a community event here in Los Alamitos—where I grew up and where Frieda’s is based.

The event on the Joint Forces Training Base is well known for its reverse triathlon race, 5K walk/run, and 10K run. Organizers added an evening fun run for kids on the night before a couple of years ago. Triathlon competitors run and ride their bikes on the actual airfield and swim in the Aquatics Training Center.

Me and my coworkers Oakley and Matt after the 5K Walk/Run

When I was in Stockholm, Sweden, in May for an international women’s conference, I was pleasantly surprised when a former Olympic athlete noticed “Los Alamitos” on my name badge. She asked, “You’re from Los Alamitos? I’ve trained there at the Base!” Up until then, I didn’t know the women’s national water polo team trains right here at the aquatics center!

One of the best photos I took on Saturday morning before I started my 5K, was of the sky, of all things. They say it never rains in Southern California. But in Los Alamitos, if often rains parachutes! And what a sight.

The Base sits on more than 1,300 acres and employs more than 850 full-time people and more than 6,000 National Guard and Reserve troops. It was formerly operated as the Naval Air Station, which also includes the Los Alamitos Army Airfield. Not a lot of people know that when Air Force One lands in Southern California, it will oftentimes land in our backyard! Even the Blue Angels have been hosted here for air shows.

Some of my local farmer friends grow strawberries and cauliflower on the Naval Weapons Station in Seal Beach, just a few miles down the road. (They lease the prime agricultural land from the government.) They often talk about the helicopters and fighter jets going in and out of the Base as the Army reservists and National Guard units train.

Many of the people who live in our community are employed at the Base. At lunchtime, it’s not unusual to see men and women in military uniforms in our local restaurants, and we all know they are reservists or active duty, serving our country.

A couple of times a year, the Base opens to the community. One is for a Fourth of July Fireworks Spectacular before which you can set up your picnic on the fields, then watch a professional fireworks show. And the other, of course, is Race on the Base. These events really bring us all together: residents, businesses, and the military.

I always diligently talk about our Base with visitors. Can you tell that I’m very proud of my community?

Karen

This past weekend, I attended TEDxRiceU, an independently organized TED event at Rice University in Houston, Texas.

If you’re not aware, TED is a nonpartisan nonprofit started in 1984 and devoted to spreading ideas, usually in the form of short, powerful talks. Smaller, local events have sprung up all over the country as the TED organization shares its name and guidelines so others can put on TED-type talks, each of which is called a “TEDx.”

Why did I go to TEDxRiceU?

My friend Lisa Helfman was one of the speakers. Lisa’s day job is as the director of real estate for a large Texas-based grocery chain. Like many of us, she is also a mom (of two young boys, ages 9 and 12) and is constantly balancing the demands of her career and her home life. But her talk was about Brighter Bites, the nonprofit she founded, and how it’s gone national.

Lisa and Dr. Shreela Sharma, co-founder of Brighter Bites

Lisa told the captive audience that before starting Brighter Bites, her body was completely out of balance despite her healthy and happy appearance. She was throwing up daily from stress headaches, eating bad food, and drinking so much Diet Dr. Pepper that she convinced her firm to add it to the soda fountain offering.

So she joined a co-op to add more fruits and vegetables to her diet. As she started to eat more fresh produce, her kids did as well. And she did start to feel better and less stressed. One day, at a birthday party, her son said, “Mom, do I have to eat that cake? It’s too sweet. Do they have grapes or blueberries?” True story!

That conversation with her son inspired her to start Brighter Bites in Houston in 2012.

The mission is to create communities of health through fresh food. As a nonprofit, the company delivers fruit and vegetables into families’ hands through their kids’ schools, while teaching them how to choose and use a different kind of fast food. Brighter Bites now receives funding to serve families and schools not only in Houston but also in Dallas, Austin, New York City, Washington DC, and Southwest Florida.

That was indeed a great story. But that’s not the whole story.

Lisa’s TEDx message was titled “The Virtuous Cycle of Caring.” She spoke about how by caring for herself, it inspired her to care for others. And caring for others, telling her story every chance she gets, and listening to the stories of the beneficiaries of Brighter Bites caused her to feel better physically and mentally. Lisa was actually caring for herself more, as a result of caring for others.

You would think that because it was her story, one she is incredibly passionate about and knows intimately, she could easily do an extemporaneous 18-minute talk from a few bullet points on an index card.

Wrong.

You see, Lisa had set a personal goal for herself three years ago to be invited to do a TED talk. She dreamed about it. She talked about it. It was on her goal list. Then, without her knowledge, Lisa’s staff submitted an application and nominated her to give the TED talk!

When Lisa was invited in November by Rice University to give one of only seven TEDx talks at the event, she got very serious about it.

First, Lisa brainstormed with her management team and board of directors at Brighter Bites on the right story to tell. Should it be about how her personal journey inspired her to start a nonprofit? How almost every single person she told her idea to connected her to potential sponsors, donors, and supporters? How she was introduced to one of the country’s leading epidemiologists who does research on how food consumption can change behavior and health, and ultimately help control and reduce the country’s obesity epidemic?

Then Lisa worked with her marketing agency to put together her slides and hired a speech coach to work on her delivery. She practiced multiple times a day for weeks, making small tweaks as she went to perfect the talk.

You may think that her preparation was overkill, but that’s because you don’t know Lisa like I do.

Have you ever felt like you practiced too much for a presentation to a client or for a speech? I doubt it. Most of us wish we had more time to practice! We especially wish we had a co-worker or colleague who would sit in front of us and critique our message, our style, and our slides.

I can tell you after watching Lisa’s delivery on Saturday afternoon that her preparation paid off. People queued up afterward to tell her how inspiring she was!

Not only has Lisa done a great job of taking care of herself and her children, and recognizing that she could leverage her passion to start a nonprofit that would benefit other families, but her intense professional approach to her once-in-a-lifetime chance to make a great first impression has helped spread her story across the U.S.

Lisa at TEDxRiceU. I’m so proud of my friend!

I admire Lisa for creating her own Virtuous Circle of Caring through Brighter Bites. And I’ve been inspired by her willingness to “date TED exclusively for six weeks” so she could be the most memorable and polished presenter.

We should all be a little more like Lisa.

Karen

P.S. TEDxRiceU recorded all the presentations and they will be made available on Facebook within a few weeks.

A few months ago, I shared my latest obsession with Audible, which offers an alternative to reading paper books. Essentially, it’s the most recent version of “books on tape.”

I have loved reading since I was a child. In fact, my first paid job was as a page in my local library! But as my life got busier and the time available to actually read (without falling asleep) diminished, I was ecstatic to be introduced to Audible as a way to use those long commutes up and down the Southern California freeways in a positive way.

But what to “read?” I am not a great fan of mysteries, and I did not want to listen only to motivational messages and self-help books. So I asked my friends for their recommendations and started paying attention to book reviews.

To be honest, biographies and autobiographies have always been my favorite kinds of books. To get inside the head of someone I admire or to learn about their lives from the inside out has always intrigued me.

I have listened to 15 books since I first subscribed to Audible last September, and I have found that when authors narrate their books, it’s as if you are truly inside their heads. The way they read their books, the inflection of their voices, and how they pause make the book feel like you are one-on-one with the authors.

So, let me tell you about my two latest findings.

First, spaceships. Or rather, the International Space Station. I was flipping through my Costco magazine a few months ago when I noticed that an autobiography of an astronaut was featured: “Endurance” by Scott Kelly.

Scott literally “talks” about his life’s journey, bouncing between the past and the present in alternating chapters. For example, as a boy, he was not the best student. But after reading “The Right Stuff” during college, he became determined to become an astronaut. Of course, he talks about his 340 days aboard the International Space Station—and his twin brother, Mark Kelly (whose wife, politician Gabrielle Giffords, was shot in Arizona in 2011), who is also an astronaut.

Scott’s book is captivating and eye-opening. He shares his innermost thoughts and feelings about his marriage, his kids, his family, NASA, Russian cosmonauts, you name it. Scott tells it like it is, complete with swear words!

And now, tennis shoes.

I haven’t always listened to my mother, but like me, she is a voracious reader. A few months ago, she said, “Karen, you MUST read ‘Shoe Dog’ by Phil Knight, the founder of Nike. It is the best book I have ever read!”

I thought, really mom? The best book ever? I think you’re exaggerating. But she kept saying it. Since I had run out of books to listen to, I thought, what the heck, let’s give it a go.

The introduction was read by Knight, but the rest of the book was read by two-time Tony winner Norbert Leo Butz. And boy, he sounds almost as if he has become Phil!

For me, this book had everything going for it. It was an autobiography. It was about a business person. There were plenty of challenges, inspiration, and conflict, plus many business lessons. It was a love story. And sadly, at the end, when Phil writes about losing his oldest son during a diving incident, there was extreme sadness and raw emotion.

What did I enjoy most about Phil’s story? He was passionate about running (he ran track in college), then he took that passion and turned it into a business idea—distributing running shoes manufactured in Japan. No matter what obstacle he faced—lack of money, need for personnel, challenging and lying competition, creating a new market that hadn’t existed before—he ignored them. (Gee, doesn’t that sound like somebody we know?)

Coincidentally, Phil turns 80 next week; he is ranked by Forbes as the 28^th richest person in the world. He is humble and passionate. His willingness to share his story was probably cathartic in some ways, but for me, it was truly inspirational.

By the way, “Shoe Dog” may be the best book I have ever read. You were right, Mom.

Karen

P.S. Meeting Phil in person is now on my Bucket List!

A few weeks ago, I was in Hawaii on vacation. One of my great pleasures on the islands is tasting all the tropical fruits grown there. Although I sell tropical fruits for a living, the truth is that nothing tastes like a ripe fruit, right off the tree.

So, after a lunch in Hilo, we decided to walk through the local farmers market on the main street through town. In California, when I go to a farmers market, I see lots of strawberries, tomatoes, citrus fruit, and avocados. In Hilo that day, I saw mounds of starfruit, guavas, lychees, chayote, rambutans, and, alas, one of my favorites, mangosteens.

I have such fond memories of mangosteens. When I was in high school, my mom imported the first mangosteens from British Honduras, now called Belize. I remember taking some samples of the dark purple, hard-shelled fruit to school; everyone looked at me like I was crazy as I showed them how to “squeeze” the hard shell and the amazing white flesh appeared. It was like a soft, tender fruit salad. After that first imported shipment, the USDA announced that the fruit could no longer be imported due to agricultural restrictions; many tropical fruits pose a threat to California agriculture as they are hosts to damaging pests.

Currently the only fresh mangosteens we get on a consistent basis are from Thailand and they have to be irradiated due to agricultural restrictions. Just recently we have been able to import them from Mexico.

But nothing rivals my memories of eating my first mangosteen back in high school. That was until my recent day in Hilo.

As we waited for our plane to arrive to take us to Maui, we tore through the bag of mangosteens. As you can see, we made a bit of a mess. A yummy mess!

And in case you’re wondering about the medicinal qualities of mangosteens (aka the Queen of Fruits), it is the outside shell that is used for its possible curative properties. The shell is dried and ground up to use as a supplement. Personally, I am satisfied with just the amazing flavor.

Next time you are in Hawaii, I encourage you to buy a dozen or so fruits. You will be surprised at how sweet and refreshing they are. But don’t try to bring any home to the mainland as there are strict penalties for smuggling fresh produce to the mainland U.S.!

I guess I’ll just have to go back to Hawaii soon for my mangosteen fix!

Aloha,

Karen

I’m sure I am not the only person who feels like her email inbox is being flooded daily with an overwhelming number of solicitation, informational, and junk emails, interspersed with important email communications from clients, suppliers, friends, etc.

And let’s add in there all the newsletters and media sources that feel like they need to keep us up-to-date on the latest “breaking news” multiple times a day.

For me, it’s over 200 emails a day.

Which is probably why “sort by sender” and “delete” are my two most used functions in Outlook.

Sometimes there is information I want to know about. But honestly, I don’t have time to read every single email I receive. And I just hate leaving items in my inbox, in the hope that I will go back and read them, because as my inbox continues to fill up, I ultimately, eventually delete all those “really wanted to read, but didn’t have time” emails.

Enter: Paper newsletters and magazines.

Or rather, “RE-enter.”

Remember when magazines, newspapers, and newsletters were the way we got all of our information? This was before the internet and emails, before Huffington Post and BuzzFeed. We read the daily paper newspaper from our community or region. We subscribed to magazines like Time, People, and Sunset.

And then, as the digital world expanded, the end of the paper-based news economy was predicted. There would be no newspapers and magazines would disappear.

That kind of happened for a while. But now, it seems to me that “everything old is new again.”

With the digital flooding in my inbox, I now look forward to the real paper magazines, newspapers, and newsletters I receive. I can read them at my own pace, whether on a long flight, at the nail salon, or on a leisurely Sunday morning with a cup of coffee.

And I don’t think I’m alone. In my own (produce) industry, I’ve noticed that while I continue to receive dozens of emailed breaking news items daily, it is the paper monthly magazines that get my attention the most. The glossy, color periodicals that arrive on my desk are the ones that I am able to thumb through when I am on hold. If an article is interesting and I want to share it―I rip it out and route it to my colleagues.

So, if you do any kind of communication for your business, social club, or church, I’m not sure you should have a 100-percent digital strategy. Perhaps you should consider the old-fashioned way of keeping people in the loop and send a paper newsletter. You might be surprised at how many of your customers, friends, and colleagues find it refreshing.

Comic from Poofytoo.com

Who would have thought that paper would ever be a challenge to digital? I’m sure other surprises are coming too.

Karen

On the last day of my week’s vacation on Maui, as I was getting ready for my morning walk, the Emergency Alert went off on my phone at 8:05.

I glanced at the message, and heard the echo of the alarm going off on every cell phone of the hundreds of people, attending a medical trade show, who were in the same outdoor lobby area as me.

It became surreal when I read the words, “Ballistic Missile Threat” and “this is not a drill.”
Almost immediately, my cell phone rang. It was my daughter, Alex, calling me from our hotel room on the ninth floor. “What do I do, Mom?”

“Get your clothes on and take the stairs next to the elevator and I will be standing at the bottom of the stairwell.”

The only thing that went through my mind at that moment was September 11, 2001. What did the people who survived do if they were in the Twin Towers? (They immediately made their way to ground floor of the building.)

She was down the stairs and next to me in what seemed to be seconds.

I’m sure you’ve seen the posts on Twitter, Facebook, and in the news. Actually, we both were checking Twitter constantly to get some sense if this was really happening.

We were with hundreds of people on the bottom floor of a very large hotel. There was no screaming, no rushing, no panic. We saw young moms and dads holding their infants tight, with bottles and diapers in tow. We saw people struggling to get their pants on, as many rushed out of their hotel rooms with their clothes in hand. We did see people crying and many people calling their families and loved ones. The hotel staff directed us into ballrooms, which were large and “safe” (still not sure what that means). Everyone stayed amazingly calm.

So, what do you do when you learn that a ballistic missile is headed toward you? As it turns out, not a whole heck of a lot.

It’s not like you can go to higher ground, like when there is a tsunami warning. And none of us was aware of any shelter-type areas in the hotel (although I figured the stairwell would be the safest and most secure).

It was over in about 20 minutes when the hotel staff announced that they had checked with the Maui Police Department and there was no missile threat. About 15 to 20 minutes after that, we got an Emergency Alert text telling us there was no missile threat and it was a false alarm. Those first 20 minutes flew by. Our hearts were pounding.

But most interesting was what I observed after the “all clear” sign was given.

All the business people went back to work. Our hotel was the home base for a medical trade show, so everyone went back to their booths.

I took a walk along the beach path and walked by four or five hotel pools, which normally would be surrounded with people sitting on beach chairs. There was no one at first. Then, within 45 minutes, all the chairs were filled. I overheard parents talking to their young children, saying things like, “it was OK to be scared.”

I also noticed for the rest of the day that there was an air of calmness, civility, and patience. I realize that I was in Hawaii, where everything is usually calmer than on the mainland, but even the tourists were nicer.

It’s like what happens at Christmastime…everyone is just nicer to one another. All of us strangers had faced a seemingly dire situation together that morning; it had bonded all of us on the island. So everywhere we went, people were nicer, patient, and considerate.

When Alex and I were driving to the airport, we debriefed on our morning. These are the things we discussed:

Always know where your phone is and keep it charged.
When you are checking into a hotel, always know how to get to the stairs (because you never take the elevator in an emergency; surprisingly she saw many people on our floor waiting for the elevator).
It’s time to review our wills, living trusts, and advanced directives for healthcare and finances. And for all kids over 18―they need to have them, too!
It’s better to stay calm than to let yourself panic. We were pretty calm and offered assistance to others who didn’t know where to go, etc.
Know who you want to call in an emergency to say “I love you.”

What I learned? Life is short. Do the things you want. Tell the people you love and care about that you love and care about them.

And, yes, I do plan to return to Maui later this year. No threat of a ballistic missile is going to keep me away from the beautiful skies, the warm beaches and ocean breezes, and the amazing food.

Aloha,

Karen

Alex and me on our way to Maui

As I am writing this, I am aboard a flight from Houston, Texas, back to Orange County, California. My first business trip of the year started on January 2 and took me to Ohio, where the temperature each morning was 4 degrees. Thankfully, my gloves and thick winter coat kept me insulated from the freezing cold.

Sometimes, the dramatic change in the weather from one place to the next when you are traveling on business can affect your attitude. You know what I mean—you can be a little testy, grouchy, and not a lot of fun to be around.

Can you imagine what it must be like for flight attendants—especially during this first week of the year when non-business travelers are making their way back from their holiday vacations, and students are headed back to college, and one of the worst storms of the decade is blasting the Midwest and East Coast?

So, as I made my connection in Houston and boarded my flight home to Orange County, I did what I always do when I board the plane and said hello to the flight attendant. I could tell she wasn’t having a great day. Many flights had been canceled. When I jokingly asked about getting coffee, she let me know right away that she hadn’t even set up the galley yet.

Based on her response, I wasn’t expecting a lot on this flight home.

As the flight attendant came down the aisle shortly after the flight took off, I asked for her name.

“Althea,” she said.

“That’s a beautiful name!”

She then asked for my name, which kind of surprised me.

About 30 minutes into the flight, I was startled out of my reading when someone said, “Karen, did you say you wanted some coffee?” I mean, who knew my name on this flight?

It was Althea.

“You caught me off guard, Althea!” She giggled, and she had that smile on her face for the rest of the flight.

We connected just by knowing each other’s names. And that is all it took to change someone’s attitude.

How often do you sense that someone you are interacting with is having a bad day? Like a server at the restaurant, a checker at the grocery store, the person parking your car, or even a complete stranger in line ahead of you who is grouchy or grumpy. Do you check them off as being rude and act grouchy right back at them?

The next time you encounter those people, I would encourage you to stop for a moment and perform a small act of kindness. I’m not talking about things as dramatic or expensive as those “SoCal Helpful Honda People,” springing acts of kindness across the region from giving away free pumpkins for Halloween to helping a military member get home for the holidays. (They talked about some of these acts on their radio spot. I think it’s a brilliant marketing campaign!) I’m talking about just simply treating everyone as a person. Look them in the eye, smile, say, “have a great day,” and mean it. Find out their name. Pay them a sincere compliment or thank them for their service.

These days, there are a lot of angry, grouchy people out there. People who are having a bad day for a variety of reasons—and it’s not just the weather. I do know that being kind and making a personal connection with a complete stranger can be a game changer for them and for me.

The Dalai Lama said, “Be kind whenever possible. It is always possible.” So, why don’t we start the new year with being kind, and making it our New Year’s resolution? Smile at everyone you see even if you don’t know them. Ask strangers their names and make them feel important.

Oh, and Althea did get me some coffee after all!

Karen

I don’t know about you, but this year just flew by for me. Thankfully, the great thing about being a blogger is I can recall most of the things that were on my mind this year as I wrote them all down!

Looking Back

It has been gratifying to see people’s reaction and responses to my posts here. And when I repost on LinkedIn, I get a real-time sense whether what I am writing about is relevant.

“To Hug or Not to Hug” is my most read and shared post of 2017. Soon after that post, the big Hollywood misconduct story broke, and people who discovered my post later were surprised that I would write about that in this climate. When I wrote it, I wanted to talk about how important personal, and sometimes physical, connection has become in this age of impersonal communication technology. Interesting turn of events, isn’t it?

Another interesting and controversial topic I wrote about last year is The Unexpected Question About Cannabis. It’s the hottest California crop right now and a very timely subject to discuss because it’s going to be legal in California in just a few days.

Even more polarizing was my recent post about Non-GMO Madness. It’s good to understand different points of view and get all the information we need to make an informed decision.

The next popular post was Lessons from Billionaire Stewart Resnick. My key takeaway from Stewart is that you have to spend time on things you don’t like in order to do the things you really love. It is clear that this message resonates with many of you.

It also became clear to me that we are all getting bored with our fitness routines when I posted Why I Quit My Gym. Just so you know, I’m still changing things up as I go.

I’m also thrilled that I got to share one of my all-time favorite books with you. I hope The Five-Second Rule That Changes Everything is also now one that you follow.

Looking Forward

As we reflect on the past year and give some thought to what we want to do in 2018, I am happy to share what I’m thinking for the new year:

Spend time with my top 5 people. As my dear friend Jack Daly advised, think about the top three to five people (besides your family members) who you spend the most time with. Are they “upping your game, adding to your life?” Or does hanging out with them feel like an obligation? I’ve decided to only spend time with people who are positive, add to my life, and I truly enjoy. No more obligations!

See the country…and the world. I already have trips planned this year to visit the Grand Canyon, Maui, South Africa, Australia, Panama, and Italy. There is no time like the present to work on that bucket list!

Golf more. I have been enjoying golf since I picked up the clubs earlier this year, so I want to do more of that. And the best part is being outdoors and being with friends.

Hug! You already know that I’m a hugger. And I will keep hugging people when I see them!

Allocate some private time for myself every day. Whether it is first thing each morning when I meditate or when I journal at the end of the day, making quiet time for me is an important part of work/life balance.

Source: Woodbourne Designs LLC on Etsy

Happy New Year, and may 2018 be the best ever!

Karen

I noticed a dramatic decrease in the number of holiday cards I received at work this year. This could be due to people trying to be more mindful of the environment by using less paper, trying to save money, realizing that sending out cards en masse for business may be out of date, or all of the above.

Whatever the reason is, I’m happy fewer cards are sent. Let me tell you why.

In business, I do not understand sending a holiday card to a supposedly important client, when there is nothing personal about the card. You know what I mean.

The inside of the card is pre-printed with the sending company’s name or logo, which may or may not include the names of the owners or the employee who sent it. And don’t get me started on adding digital signatures!

Although mail-merged, printed address labels are obviously impersonal, I can understand the efficiency of that method. But digital signatures?

If I’m an important client of a company, how important do I feel if I get a pre-printed card that looks like it was ordered from a card company from 20 years ago with a digital signature and no personal message? Not at all, that’s how I feel.

There is no personal relationship here with this card someone picked out of a catalog from a greeting card company they’ve been buying from for years. Nobody stopped to ask, “Does this still make sense to send these cards?”

Going with digital cards doesn’t make it much better either. A “happy holidays” email blasted out to a mass email list may have a clever image of the staff or product, but it doesn’t have a personal note from whoever is sending it. Just what I need for the holidays, another impersonal email taking up space in my inbox.

These days, people want a personal connection. In today’s world, where we can be overwhelmed and deluged with mass emails and robo-calls, it’s nice to receive a personal message, especially during the holidays.

Everyone should make their own decision on whether they want to invest the time and money to send out holiday cards. My only request is to think about what message you are sending with your holiday greeting choices.

For me, it has always been that personal touch. For business, I send my contacts personalized emails, one person at a time. If it’s a close relationship, I text them and sometimes we end up chatting on the phone after.

As for my personal greeting cards, I’m old-fashioned. I hand-address my holiday cards. Yes, I could have printed labels, but it’s important to me personally to address them myself because as I address them, I think about each person and send my loving thoughts to them. It’s an intention I make with each and every card I send.

If you do decide to send out a holiday card or email, consider adding a special touch to your greeting by making a donation to a charity in honor of your friends and colleagues. It could be to their favorite charities or a cause of your choice that you know they’d support.

Keep it real this holiday season!

Karen

Non-GMO vodka? Really?

When I saw this ad, I realized it’s finally time to blog about GMOs. I have been putting off writing this post for many years because GMOs are a controversial subject. And that is mostly because many people do not know the facts about GMOs. So I will share some of what I know and what I’ve learned so far, in hopes that you will be more enlightened to make your own decision about them.

First of all, what is a Genetically Modified Organism (GMO) when it comes to crops? GMOAnswers says this:

Genetic engineering, also referred to as biotechnology, allows plant breeders to take a desirable trait found in nature and transfer it from one plant or organism to the plant they want to improve, as well as make a change to an existing trait in a plant they are developing. Some examples of desirable traits commonly transferred include resistance to insects and disease, and tolerance to herbicides that allows farmers to better control weeds.

Clearly, GMO is a scientific term, stating exactly what it is—a genetically modified organism. I’m sure a roomful of scientists didn’t think that one day the term GMO would be used when referring to consumer goods, especially food.

The words “genetically modified organism” sound scary from the get-go. So it does not surprise me that most people react negatively to the term, even if they don’t know what GMO stands for. (“Something that has to do with genetics?” is what I usually hear.)

Furthermore, it didn’t help that in the earlier days of GMO science, there were stories going around about scientists putting the genes from fish into vegetables, causing concern for people who have fish allergies. Some of those stories are still going around today.

Here are some facts about GMOs.

Currently only 10 crops in the U.S. have been genetically engineered (using precise plant breeding) and are commercially available. They are corn, soybeans, cotton, canola, alfalfa, sugar beets, one papaya (the rainbow variety from Hawaii), some squash, one potato (less-browning), and one apple (non-browning Arctic variety). Some of these items only have one cultivar, like the Arctic apple, which was created using genetic engineering, meaning that the rest of the varieties were not genetically modified.

What bothers me most about the term GMO is that an entire industry has sprung up around the frenzy, such as the Non-GMO Project, which claims to verify products for being non-GMO even when, in fact, those products don’t include any of the 10 crops listed.

A prime example is the vodka shown above in the ad. While some vodka is distilled from potatoes, Ketel One is made with wheat. Oh, excuse me, it’s “non-GMO grain.” Since wheat is already a non-GMO crop, this really isn’t anything to write home about. Yet, the company decided to jump on the non-GMO bandwagon and make a claim that makes the consumer wonder about other brands of vodka.

I personally don’t think that’s right.

Even though our media seems to thrive on scaring viewers, or inciting worry and filling people with doubt, I get mildly annoyed when I see “Non-GMO Verified” on foods that are simply outside of that category.

Now, the website GMOAnswers I cited from earlier is supported by many seed companies that fund research in seed production, which may include genetically engineered products. I also know that there are many forms of breeding, of which genetically engineered is just one. There are old technologies like natural breeding, and some very new technologies like gene editing with CRISPR/Cas9.

I know that the technological advances being made in food production and agriculture can help us grow more food to eradicate hunger on the planet, producing plants that are disease-resistant or drought-tolerant, or plants that can thrive on over-salinized soil or that contains additional nutrients. For example, Golden Rice is genetically-modified to contain beta-carotene to fight vitamin A deficiency in south and southeast Asia. And with the way that the Cavendish bananas we know and love are suffering from a catastrophically devastating disease, GMO may be the only way to save the world’s crop.

In contrast, there is an ever-growing movement toward nutrient-dense foods, dealing with mineral depletion in our diet, and more organic food production, which is wonderful and affordable for first-world countries that have plenty of disposable income.

So, what can you do? Educate yourself. Know that just because you read it on the Internet does not make it the truth. In doing research for this post, I found websites that had clearly incorrect information on them, information that was written with a hidden agenda to promote their products, their brands, and their lifestyle.

Next time you see “Non-GMO Verified” on a product package, I hope you will see if the product is one of the 10 crops listed above.

Also, by definition, anything that is USDA-certified Organic cannot use GMO crops.

Disclaimer: I am not unilaterally for or against GMOs. I am in favor of knowing all the facts from both sides of the conversation and forming one’s own opinion. Eyes wide open.

Karen

I’m a coffee drinker. Actually, in some ways I am a bit of a coffee snob. At home, I’ve switched from my beloved Peet’s coffee (which I have brewed every morning for at least 15 years) to my new favorite, Lavazza Classico medium roast. It’s not quite as strong as Peet’s, yet very rich-bodied.

But occasionally, especially in the evenings, I like to have a cup of tea. Especially when I am cold.

I’m pretty boring with the tea—Lipton’s black tea and hot water.

But last week, while visiting a tea-drinking friend, I was introduced to a much more sophisticated form of the home tea experience.

Enter the Breville One-Touch Tea Maker.

You can watch a four-minute YouTube video about how the One-Touch Tea Maker works.

Here is a quick recap of what I learned about tea: Different types of tea (black, green, or herbal) require different temperatures of water and lengths of time for steeping. Who knew?

As someone whose tea experimentation has revolved around ordering Earl Grey or English Breakfast tea when I am out and only drinking Lipton’s when I’m home, I was intrigued with what is known as “The Art of Tea.” I never considered that different tea types might have optimal flavor when brewed at difference temperatures. Or that steeping time would have such a tremendous effect.

But then again, I am a coffee drinker. I do understand the difference between Robusta and Arabica coffee beans and that you grind them differently depending on whether you have a drip coffee maker, French press, or pour-over cone.

I actually do have a Nespresso machine, a large French press, and my tried-and-true Capresso coffee maker, all sitting on my kitchen counter. And an electric kettle that I bought last year for making my evening tea.

But now, after watching the One-Touch Tea Maker, with its basket being slowly lowered into perfectly heated water, I can see how tea drinkers would enjoy their own specialty tea-brewing accessory to make their tea experience as enjoyable as my early morning coffee-brewing ritual.

So, if you have a close friend or loved one who just loves tea, you may want to splurge and get them a One-Touch for Hanukkah or Christmas. Or maybe for yourself!

Happy tea drinking!

Karen

One of my goals this year has been to see if I like playing golf. (I wrote about this in an earlier blog.)

I found an instructor, bought a set of clubs, and have been periodically going to the driving range to practice. For some reason, I had it in my head that I needed to keep practicing for a while, before I should head out to play actual golf on a golf course.

And then my instructor had to take a break from teaching, and I got busy with other things. So it’s been a couple of months since I’ve hit the ball. But last weekend, I went to visit friends in Prescott, Arizona, and when they heard I had taken up golf, they arranged for us to play a round.

Needless to say I was a little nervous. In addition to the fact that I hadn’t hit a ball for two months, I also had never played a full round of golf before. Thankfully my friends were easy going, and we didn’t have to keep score.

At the end of the afternoon, as we were heading off to the last hole, I realized I had gained a few insights:

It’s a good idea to take a practice swing before hitting the ball. It loosens you up and helps set the pace for your next swing (the real one). This is the same as other parts of your life, sales, for example; it’s always a good idea to practice your sales pitch before your actual presentation to get the right pace.
Don’t wait too long between your practice swing and the actual swing – if you stand there too long, you will tense up, concentrating and thinking so hard. The same thing can happen in sales. If you are concentrating too hard to make a sale, or give a sales pitch, you can cause tension in yourself. It’s better to breathe deeply, relax, and do a quick run through before your presentation. Then, with the same rhythm, speak to your actual client.
If you only practice (like go to the driving range) and never jump in and play (a round of golf), you won’t fully appreciate the entire golf experience. In sales, I would equate this to the person who spends an enormous amount of time preparing for a sales presentation, tweaking every slide, considering every possibility that will come up in the conversation, rather than using the information she has and enjoying the sales conversation.

In life, and in sales, just like in golf, there are hills and valleys in the conversation, sand traps, fast greens, and trees in the way. But the key is to use all the clubs you have in your bag, admit when you’ve lost a ball, enjoy the scenery, and at the end of the day, be grateful, not frustrated with the experience.

Thanks to my friends David and Paula Lund for so many life lessons on the golf course.

Happy golfing and Happy Thanksgiving!

Karen

My friends David and Paula My high school friend, Paula and me

I attend a lot of events. Many are for business, like the one I attended in San Francisco earlier this week—#BrandStorm. About 200, mostly strangers, gathered in a giant ballroom listening to interesting speakers and then moving to meal functions and breakout sessions over two days.

Just before the second day’s morning session, many people were taking their seats around the room, arranging themselves at the round tables for 10. And I noticed something. I immediately put my things down, grabbed my coffee, and started moving around the room, saying hello to a few industry friends and familiar faces. If I didn’t know someone at a table, I smiled, and then introduced myself and asked them to do the same.

But what I noticed was that no one was doing the same thing. No one.

PHOTO CREDIT: Flickr/Gauthier Delecroix

I realize I am an extrovert, and a morning person, so this kind of thing is kind of in my genes. But it really struck me that not a single other person in a room of about 200 was introducing themselves. Everyone seemed to be checking their email or looking over the program. And this was a marketing conference, so it would make sense that people would be introducing themselves and getting to know others. And that’s when it hit me. “Networking” has almost become a bad word.

It used to mean a way you meet new people, but now it’s become work. Like, it takes a lot of effort and you may have to try really hard. It may not seem natural or authentic. You may appear to be working the room.

My blog post last week, “To Hug or Not to Hug,” received almost 8,000 views on LinkedIn alone, more than three times as many as most of my blogs. I sense that the message of physical touch really resonated with people.

The lack of networking at #BrandStorm and the reaction to that blog have made me realize that in this day of email overload, the need to be available 24/7, and our apparent inability to “unplug,” people really do want connection. Physical connection. Personal connection. Emotional connection. We crave them all.

So, I’ve decided that instead of using the word “networking” and having that visual image of working the room, we should call it “connecting.” Connecting makes you feel differently. It’s not work. It’s personal. It’s satisfying. It’s sincere.

As we move into the holidays and attend many social events, keep in mind that you will be able to connect with people. And hopefully that will bring a smile to your face!

Karen

PHOTO CREDIT: Flickr/Greentech Media

Have you noticed that it is not entirely unusual for people in business to hug each other when saying hello or goodbye? Back in the day, when we had a business meeting, we were all very formal, and shook hands before and after meetings. We would never think of hugging someone we do business with. Hugs were reserved for family members and very close friends.

But I’ve noticed that it has become OK to hug people in business and I think it says a lot about what’s going on in the world today.

I think all of us need a hug every once in a while. In this time of being Facebook “friends” or LinkedIn “connections,” it’s hard to know who is really your friend and who is just a connection (formerly referred to as an acquaintance). With so many people in business working remotely or from their home offices, it’s hard to feel connected to your work colleagues. And if you travel a lot, or just have a long commute, it’s equally as hard to feel connected to your family.

So what do you do?

One of my coworkers, Oakley, used to ride a commuter bus to work in downtown Los Angeles. Five days a week, she rode on the bus with the same group of strangers. Over the years, they got to know each other. Now, many years later, they have all changed jobs multiple times. And they have an annual reunion dinner because they became actual friends! Their bond? Riding the bus together, first as strangers.

For me, I’ve noticed some unintended consequences of connecting with industry work colleagues via Facebook. As I see photos of their family vacations, life cycle events, or personal challenges (like running a marathon), I feel more connected to them. Now when I see them at an industry event, I know quite a bit about them (based on their posts) and suddenly there is a personal connection. Instead of shaking their hands, I find myself hugging them and asking about their family, their new child or grandchild, or home. It’s amazing how connected you feel when people open up and share what’s going on in their personal lives.

Photo Credit: Flickr/Kashmut

I still do shake hands with new business colleagues or acquaintances. But after a nice meal together, I find myself saying goodbye with a hug, more often than with a handshake. And I’ve noticed the same thing happening with both women and men. I see a lot of guys do that “chest bump” hug that doesn’t look entirely sincere, but provides the same affectionate bonding.

How do you feel about this? Do you find yourself only shaking hands with people you meet, or have you found the same thing going on? That a hug is more satisfying? It provides a different kind of connection, one we all need.

So, in this day of pervasive working remotely, commuting two to three hours a day, or finding your closest friends are your Facebook friends, I give you permission to hug people, instead of just shaking their hands.

I think you will find, like I have, that the personal, tactile connection is deeply satisfying and grounding. And helps you get through the day.

Hugs,

Karen

Last Saturday evening I was invited to a gratitude party for L.A. Compost. “Gratitude Party.” What a great way to thank your supporters in a non-pretentious way. And the price of entry? Make a donation of an amount you feel comfortable with to support L.A. Compost!

Getting there was a bit of a driving adventure as it was located in a warehouse/gallery in a small neighborhood near Dodger Stadium (Go, Dodgers!). Even though it was only about 20 miles from my house, it took an hour to get there, weaving through the neighborhoods of South Central L.A. It actually wasn’t too far from Chinatown and DTLA (downtown LA), and the Los Angeles Wholesale Produce Market where I worked after college.

The founder of L.A. Compost, Michael Martinez, greeted the small group of 80 people shortly after I arrived. His story was so inspiring. Originally from Los Angeles, he ended up as a Teach for America school teacher in Miami-Dade, Florida. During his time as a teacher, Michael was astounded that the young people he worked with didn’t know where their food came from. He helped the students, their families, and the community create communal gardens at the school. He remembers the kids getting so excited to see broccoli and other vegetables growing that they actually fought over who would get to eat the food!

Me with Michael of L.A. Compost

When he relocated back to Los Angeles, and with the passion that obviously percolated while working for Teach for America, he decided he wanted to make a difference here in SoCal. So he founded L.A. Compost, a nonprofit that began by working with four schools to lead students in composting waste from cafeteria kitchens. Michael also oversees compost and garden hubs at the Natural History Museum of Los Angeles and the University of Southern California, where he runs school and community workshops.

L.A. Compost has grown and now helps set up composting hubs around the greater Los Angeles area.

The gallery where the event was held was filled with various pop-up displays demonstrating how composting works and highlighting a few other organizations. Two of the pop-ups really caught my eye.

Imperfect Produce offers home delivery of misshapen fresh fruits and vegetables that would normally not make its way to consumers. Its business model is, essentially, to seize the rejects! Imperfect Produce, an actual company, and other organizations are finding ways to reduce the amount of wasted food by making it “sexy” to be ugly, misshapen, and dimply. (Conventional supermarkets and club stores typically insist on consistently sized and pristine-looking produce, and will reject it for blemishes or marks that really have no effect on the eating quality.)

Next to Imperfect Produce was a pop-up for L.A. Kitchen, which was started in 2015 by Robert Egger (who also started the famous DC Central Kitchen). Robert created a teaching kitchen, reclamation center for wasted food, and feeding facility for low-income senior citizens all rolled into one. It’s really brilliant. Gather up the food that would normally go to waste and give it to the hungry.

What was so interesting about these two organizations is that they explained to me how they find themselves working together. If Imperfect Produce has fruits and vegetables it does not get orders for, it is donated it to L.A. Kitchen, which then processes the fresh produce into food and meals for the hungry. And if L.A. Kitchen has excess fresh produce, it oftentimes allows Imperfect Produce to market it.

If you’re reading my blog, chances are you have never known hunger. However, whether you know it or not, you probably live in a city or county that does have extreme hunger. Many times it is camouflaged. People are ashamed to say they are hungry. Through my work with the Second Harvest Food Bank of Orange County, I have learned that even in my own county thousands of people (many of them young children, entire families, and seniors) experience food insecurity every week.

Many of us do what we can to help alleviate hunger. We provide canned food during a food drive or we write checks to food banks and other organizations who provide food to the hungry. We may volunteer at a food kitchen during the year or during the holidays.

But how many of us will make it our personal mission, our career or avocation, to find solutions to help feed the hungry? To educate people on how they can personally make a difference? To literally walk the talk?

I say that Michael Martinez is a pretty amazing guy to find such a holistic way to create and promote healthier lifestyles. He has partnered with existing organizations (like Imperfect Produce, L.A. Kitchen, and others) and continues to use his training as a teacher to educate young people on how to make healthy choices and create a healthier planet.

Like many, I recycle at my home and in our office. I’ve thought about composting at my house, but was talked out of it by friends who said, “It can be smelly.” After attending Michael’s gratitude party, I think I need to do further investigation into composting. Perhaps that will help me with my next big project: a home garden!

Karen

In May, I attended the Berkshire Hathaway annual meeting in Omaha, Nebraska. It was exciting to watch and listen to the Oracles of Omaha (Warren Buffett and Charlie Munger) answer questions about their investment decisions.

But even more exciting and intellectually stimulating was what I experienced the day before when I attended an invitation-only meeting of global business leaders. There were about 100 of us in the hotel meeting room and during the course of the day, a variety of participants got up and talked about trends, leadership, their life’s journey, and more. They came from all over the world: Oman, Australia, California, Iowa, and Switzerland, to name a few.

At the end of the day, our host and facilitator stood in front of the room and asked people to share their main observations: takeaways and “aha”s.

Meditation was on the top of the list.

Yes, meditation had been mentioned by many of the leaders and CEOs in our group. Honestly, I was quite surprised to learn that so many of the world’s business leaders practice meditation. Common threads in their comments were that it was a way to create calm in the day, to give them time to get centered, and to get rid of distractions, and it helped create some inner peace.

After I traveled home from Omaha, I kept thinking in the back of my head—I really want to learn to meditate.

A few months ago, one of my personal advisors suggested I take at least 10 minutes every day to sit still and be quiet. Like many of us in business, I feel like I am constantly on the hamster wheel of life and the only time I stop is when I roll into bed at night. Go-go-go. That’s what it’s always felt like. It was nearly impossible for me to think about sitting still for 10 minutes and not doing anything. But I did try it. I was inconsistent, but I started to do it on the weekends when I was home alone. And sometimes when I got home at night, I would make a conscious effort to sit quietly in a dark area of my house and do nothing. It felt weird at first, but then it got better.

Then, about a month ago, a friend of mine told me she had started meditating. And I said, “Oh, I’ve always wanted to meditate.” She said she uses an app on her phone and she shared it with me (there was a free trial).

So, I downloaded the app, got up a little earlier the next morning and listened to the guided meditation (for 20 minutes total). What I liked about this guided meditation is that Oprah gives a 1- to 2-minute overview, then Deepak Chopra shares a 2- to 3-minute insight. Then he gives you a specific mantra and peaceful music plays for 13 to 14 minutes as you repeat the mantra to yourself.

And then I would start my day.

So, I’ve been meditating for four weeks and this is what I’ve learned:

I actually look forward to my meditation time. I used to be rush-rush-rush in the morning, but now I take my time. The meditation actually sets my intention for the day.
I’ve noticed that I feel more calm and clear at work. More focused. Not so distracted.
I am sleeping better at night.

A couple of days last weekend, I had the time to meditate a second time in the afternoon. I re-listened to the same meditation as in the morning. I felt energized and clearer. I found myself getting excited just thinking about meditating a second time on the same day.

In casual conversation with two male acquaintances over the last few weeks, both told me they had been thinking about meditating as well. I shared the link above and both of them, business executives, are trying it out.

Many Fortune 500 CEOs use this mindfulness practice: Rupert Murdoch, Oprah Winfrey, Bill Ford, and Arianna Huffington, to name just a few. Harvard Business Review published this article about the trend in 2015.

Many meditation apps are available. Check out headspace.com and calm.com for starters. If you’re wondering if meditation is for you, just think about it. And if you already meditate, I would love to hear from you.

Namaste,
Karen

October 5 was National Kale Day! Woo-hoo!

Last year, I wrote about National Kale Day and about how it started. And how it seemed that everywhere you turned, you would see kale being featured as the new “it” food. It’s an ingredient in salads at fast casual restaurants like McDonald’s and Chic-Fil-A. And all sorts of snack companies, like Brad’s Kale Chips, have popped up.

I attended an industry luncheon this week where kale was a featured ingredient in the salad. Honestly, a salad made with just chopped kale, diced beets, and feta cheese left me a little cold (and hungry). I found it unappealing. And I’m in the industry!

I’m guessing that many consumers are feeling the same way when food companies take a popular food and try to insert it into their menus every way possible.

What was appealing about kale in the first place? It was the dense nutrient content (vitamin A and fiber), plus the natural healing properties of cruciferous-type vegetables. But no one really wanted to EAT kale—because it’s so fibrous and chewy—so they juiced it.

And I think that’s what started the “kale craze.”

Photo: Flickr/Noelle

My first real exposure to the health benefits of kale was when I watched this TEDx talk by Dr. Terry Wahls at TEDx Iowa City 2011. The talk is entitled, “Minding your Mitochondria.” In a nutshell, Dr. Wahls was diagnosed with multiple sclerosis (MS) in 2007. She quickly declined, began taking doctor-prescribed medicine, and did chemo, but she declined further to the point that she was wheelchair-bound and could barely move on her own. Thankfully, due to her curiosity and her research training, she found a different way to treat her MS. In fact, if you take the 18 minutes to watch to her TEDx talk, you will see the role that kale (and other nutrient-rich greens, berries, vegetables, plus grass-fed meats) played in her almost 100 percent recovery.

Yes, you read that correctly—her almost 100 percent recovery.

If you are concerned about food allergies (including dairy and gluten), arthritis, asthma, fibromyalgia, dementia, Alzheimer’s, diabetes, MS, Parkinson’s, to name a few, then I highly recommend watching this 18-minute, life-changing TEDx talk.

After watching it multiple times, I am more compelled than ever to have a kale-based green drink every day and to increase my consumption of fresh fruits and vegetables. For my health and vitality.

So, yes, this week we celebrated National Kale Day! Do yourself and your family a big favor, and have some kale.

Karen

I am a lifelong learner. I love to attend seminars and workshops, and read online content about self-improvement, marketing trends, entrepreneurs, business, food, and all sorts of things. And I’m a magazine reader, but for some reason I had gotten out of the habit of reading books.

Actually, I do have a book on my nightstand, but it’s like a sleeping pill. I start reading with great intent, and within five to seven minutes, my eyelids get heavy and I find myself dozing off.

But it has been frustrating for me because I have always liked to read. Actually, my first job when I was 15 was in our local library; I filed the books back onto the shelves when they were returned by the library patrons. I recall checking out two to three books every week; they all looked so interesting.

I even joined a book club about 10 years ago, but found that most months I wasn’t able to read the entire sleeping pill, I mean book, and eventually I quit the club.

But I still love books!

People have always talked about “books on tape,” but since my commute to work is 4.4 miles, I didn’t think they would work for me.

And then I discovered Audible, an audio subscription service from Amazon. My coworker Hazel had mentioned Audible to me, but I just couldn’t wrap my head around listening to books on my short drive each day.

Then, I was taking a class and my instructor assigned a book for us to read. It was only available on Audible as it is out of print. So I went online, subscribed to Audible, and downloaded the app. I was thrilled that my first book was free, and the monthly subscription is less than $15. You can download one book of your choice each month.

I figured that one book a month was more than plenty and perhaps it might help me read the stack of books I have on my list.

Was I wrong! I didn’t realize exactly how much I do drive, and I went through that first book within a day (it was only an hour long). I then downloaded a fiction book I had missed reading in my book club a few years ago, a Pulitzer Prize winner that everyone had raved about. Even though it was more than 10 hours long, I found myself spending a few extra minutes parked in my garage each day listening to the end of the chapter. Finished that book within a week.

Now, I’m hooked! In the last six weeks, I have listened to five books (some fiction, some self-improvement). Whereas I used to dread those long drives by myself to meetings in downtown L.A. or south Orange County, I find I now look forward to having an hour or more to listen to my books.

Occasionally Audible sends me access to free best sellers and other promotions. As I think back to my treks to the local Barnes & Noble bookstore, I recall my great intentions of reigniting my voracious reading habit, only to have that stack of books on my nightstand grow. I also lost interest in lugging those heavy books on business trips (I fall asleep faster on airplanes than I do at home, so it was a lose-lose proposition for me).

If you love to read, or used to love to read, and the thought of not having a crook in your neck—from looking down at a book or a small screen—is appealing, I encourage you to try Audible (or podcasts or Spotify, and there are others). It changed my life. And it may well change yours!

Karen

Blue Apron. Hello Fresh. Purple Carrot. Plated (as of this week, now owned by Albertson’s). These are just a few of the meal kit companies that have created a new business model.

What is a meal kit? A meal kit is all the fresh ingredients and seasoning you need to make a meal, all measured out exactly to the recipe provided. Everything is in one box, delivered to your door on a schedule of your choosing. Depending on the service, you can choose the menu you want to cook or you can request a surprise menu.

Basically, you are ordering all the ingredients to make a good tasting “gourmet” meal, except you don’t have to go shopping or even leave your home or office. Every single ingredient is individually packaged with the exact amount the recipe calls for, so there is no buying four ounces of fresh dill when you only need one small sprig. Everything is pre-measured, eliminating the risk of over-seasoning your meal or forgetting a spice.

A Blue Apron meal kit

It sounds kind of fun, right? I think so too, but I have never ordered any of the meal kits because of my busy travel schedule.

Fortunately, a few weeks ago, I ran into Terri Langhans, a high school pal who is also a world class speaker and author. Terri has tried several of the meal kit services, so I asked her about her experiences so far.

My first meal kit wasn’t mine. It was my neighbor’s, and she dropped it off on her way to the airport to attend a family funeral. Inside the big box were three smaller boxes, about the size of skinny shoe boxes, each containing the ingredients for a meal that would serve two people. It was like unpacking a box of birthday presents from Grandma, before Amazon was invented.

“How great is this!?” I thought.

Answer: Very.

For me, a focus group of one, meal kits aren’t about eating healthy, controlling portion size, discovering new recipes or being able to recycle the packaging. It’s all about less stress and more fun around meal planning and preparation.

After a day of dealing with a never-ending To Do list, I doubt that I’m the only one who dreads having to answer the “what’s for dinner?” question. Even when I’m the one asking. What do I have in the fridge? Something from the freezer? Nah, no time to defrost. Are there any leftovers that haven’t grown fur? I don’t want to stop at the store. Isn’t today Meatless Monday? How much is left of that salad bag from Costco? Popcorn’s a vegetable, isn’t it? I guess I better go to the store. Yikes, I need gas. And wine.

I can certainly relate to that!

Open the box. Read the recipe. Follow the directions which have been simplified for even the newest of cooks can follow. For example, the recipe card doesn’t assume you know what sauté means. It would more likely say, “While the vegetables roast, heat a pan on medium heat. Add olive oil (already pre-measured in a packet). When the oil shimmers, add chopped shallots and cook, stirring occasionally for 2-3 minutes. Do not let them brown.”

All that detail means that not only does everything come out cooked perfectly, to temperature, but everything comes out at the same time. Again, less stress, more fun.

The next night, I arrived home to find hubby and two of our friends assembled at various “work stations” in our kitchen. They were wielding a spatula, a chef’s knife or parchment paper, according to which section of the two remaining two recipe cards they were assigned. The oven was pre-heating, everything was in its place, including an open bottle of wine.

“Hi, sweetheart!” hubby said, handing me a glass. “We’re having a dinner-making party.”

After the meal, we went online and created two new accounts, ordered our menus and made a date for the next dinner-making party. This time it would be BYOB. As in Bring Your Own Box.

After reading Terri’s comments, I’m seriously planning on ordering a meal kit next time I have a few friends over for dinner. And to make it even more fun, I think I’ll ask them if they want to help cook!

Karen

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It’s an auspicious week.

At sundown on Wednesday, September 20, the Jewish New Year, Rosh Hashanah, will begin. The celebration of the Jewish New Year is observed for 10 days and will culminate with the Day of Atonement, Yom Kippur, starting at sundown on Friday, September 29, and ending the next day. Right in the middle is the autumnal equinox in the Northern Hemisphere on September 22. That is the day that the daylight and night hours are virtually equal.

Several traditions surround the Jewish New Year.

One of my favorites is the tradition to try a new fruit in the new year. That tradition is never more evident than in New York and Los Angeles, where large neighborhoods of Jewish consumers clamor to buy the weirdest and most unusual fruits they can to help bring in the new year. My company, of course, has great fun with this, as we ship huge truckloads of exotic fruits to New York City every year in anticipation of the holiday shopping rush. Last year, the Wall Street Journal even did a story on this, including this video.

This year, some of the top sellers have been:

Jackfruit Dragon Fruit Cactus Pear Kumquats Kiwano (Horned Melon) Cape Gooseberries

Another tradition is that those 10 days between Rosh Hashanah and Yom Kippur are a time for reflection and forgiveness. I always interpreted it to be the time to reconcile any differences or disagreements and to settle any issues with friends, family, or coworkers. Even if you’re not Jewish, it’s a great time to make peace and settle any issues and make amends.

Yom Kippur, the Day of Atonement, is a day of fasting, so Jews around the world choose to take the time from sundown to sundown to be humbled and appreciate all the suffering and sacrifice that our ancestors went through during difficult times. Even if we are not able to fast completely, many of us spend the day at our temples or in a quiet place. My favorite part of the day is the break-the-fast dinner, usually hosted at a friend’s house. We all bring our favorite dishes and break bread together. It’s the perfect way to finish the celebration of the new year—with close family and friends.

Autumnal equinox is a special time as well. It signals the official beginning of fall, when the leaves outside are turning from green to orange and red. We decorate our homes with dried corn and gourds, and the weather cools down. With cooler weather, we start baking squash in the oven and cooking root vegetables for meals, instead of serving spring and summer asparagus, and cold salads.

Even when you walk into your produce department, you’ll see the difference. Produce managers across the country do their fall resets right after Labor Day, building big displays of hard-shelled squash; peaches and nectarines are replaced with even bigger displays of apples and pears.

As you enjoy this time of year, whether you are officially celebrating the Jewish New Year of 5778 or just want an excuse to try some new fruits, it’s a great time to pause, reflect, and set your intentions for a time of prosperity, peace, and friendship.

L ’Shanah Tova (that’s “for a good year” in Hebrew),

Karen

A few months ago, I decided I couldn’t be the only person on the planet who is mystified by these two terms: “Bitcoin” and “Blockchain.” So I started doing some research by asking some of the geeks and nerds I meet to explain them to me in layman’s terms.

I’ll start with Blockchain. I was at an AgTech (agriculture technology) conference two months ago and was chatting with a millennial attendee. Seena Amidi of Silicon Valley’s Plug and Play Tech Center, which is billed as the world’s largest startup accelerator and corporate innovation consultancy, seemed pretty savvy, yet down-to-earth. So I asked him, “Can you explain Blockchain to me—in English?”

Without skipping a beat, he explained it like this:

He said Blockchain is a 100-percent secure way to store information (kind of like encryption, but it connects all pieces of related information). Pieces of information are stored in individual blocks; once entered into the block, it cannot be altered. It is time-stamped and linked to the previous block. It’s almost impossible to hack. Multiple people can add related information in a new block.

I asked him what the applications might be.

He gave me the example of a company like mine, storing the names of vendors and the food safety information associated with each individual vendor. As part of a Blockchain, we can share select parts of the information with customers when needed. For example, we can let them access the food safety information on our suppliers, but they can’t access other, proprietary information that is stored in the Blockchain.

Well, that totally makes sense in the business world. All businesses have many types of information to store. Depending on who they need to share the information with (vendors, customers, the government), using Blockchain could save time and prevent redundancies (having to enter information in multiple places).

For non-business users, a perfect application is a person’s medical records. Multiple doctors can enter information into the Blockchain; it is time-stamped and cannot be altered. The patient can access the information, but it is completely secure. An article in Forbes Magazine earlier this year has an excellent explanation of Blockchain.

Photo Credit: Flickr/Zach Copley

Bitcoin is actually a digital currency. I know it’s hard to imagine a currency that does not have paper bills or coins, and exists only on the Internet. But that is the essence of Bitcoin. And a lot of people think it is worth something and could be a big part of the future. I found some pretty interesting articles about it. Here is one of my favorite articles. The value of Bitcoin is determined by how much people are willing to exchange it for. There are already many businesses around the world that accept Bitcoin, including a Subway restaurant in Pennsylvania!

So, how do you buy, track, store, and spend Bitcoin? Blockchain. When Bitcoin was conceived, a secure way to record the transactions on a “ledger” was needed to eliminate the chance of redundancies or double entries. Thus, Blockchain came into being.

So, now you probably know just about enough about Blockchain and Bitcoin to carry on a conversation at a cocktail party. And just in case you are wondering, the way the Bitcoin system was set up, there can never be more than 21 million bitcoins and the current value of one bitcoin is $4,493.99.

There you go!

Karen

During this past week, I attended two Farm to Table dinners. After reading about Farm to Table dinners and writing about them and never having the opportunity to attend one, it was interesting to attend two in one week. And they were so completely different.

The genesis of Farm to Table dinners is an extension of the popularity of local farmers markets. Consumers love connecting to the growers of their food. It humanizes the eating experience, which is why consumers will pay more money for produce with a shorter shelf life.

It’s about the experience, not the efficiency or convenience.

My first Farm to Table experience was at a fundraiser at Rancho Los Alamitos, a local historic site in Long Beach, to benefit its educational programs. Several ranchos (or homesteads) in and around the Long Beach area of Southern California have been preserved as historical landmarks. Much like the 21 historic California Missions that span the entire coast from Basilica San Diego de Alcala in San Diego all the way up to Mission San Francisco Solano in Sonoma, the Ranchos are a big part of the history of the early California settlers. As you can see, it was a beautiful evening in a delightful setting.

Photo: Jennifer Herbig

The chef of the evening was Paul Buchanan of Primal Alchemy, who is completely passionate about discovering local farms and foods and creating masterpieces that his clientele can enjoy. Paul has an impressive resume, having worked in some of the best known kitchens in Southern California: Campanile, Wolfgang Puck, Water Grill, and Pascal’s in Orange County, to name a few. As you can see from the photos of the evening, our dinner was set outside on the grounds of Rancho Los Alamitos, where 300 patrons dined at long, glorious tables, draped with white linens, and decorated with bouquets of fresh herbs and russet potatoes with small flags inserted in them as table signs.

Every course was served family style. And between the salad course and dinner, Russ Parsons, former food editor of the Los Angeles Times (whom we refer to as the “Mayor of Long Beach” as he knows E-V-E-R-Y-O-N-E), did a quick interview with Chef Buchanan.

Photo: Jennifer Herbig

The food had amazing flavors and it was dazzling to have all this food come out at perfect temperatures arranged perfectly on platters. The long tables were conducive to easygoing conversations and a leisurely pace. Quite different from a normal dinner at a restaurant where we always seem to complain about the pace of the meal, or lack of it.

My second Farm to Table dinner was held at an outdoor restaurant, The Farmhouse in Corona del Mar. It is a new, on-site restaurant at the famous Southern California landmark, Roger’s Gardens. If you enjoy gardening and landscaping, this is the most inspirational place ever.

The occasion for this dinner was because my friend and favorite Southern California chef, Alan Greeley, recently closed his landmark restaurant, The Golden Truffle. All the local Orange County chefs, who were mostly trained and supported by Alan during the last 30 years, got together to have a “Bon Voyage Celebration.” As a testimonial to Chef Alan’s popularity, an email went out to his patron list and within two days, the dinner for 150 was sold out! In fact I had to pull a few strings and text Alan to get a ticket for myself!

When I arrived on Monday evening, it was a who’s who of the Orange County culinary scene with famous chefs, and food writers and journalists.

Photo: OC Weekly

Chef Alan’s friends prepared an incredible four-course meal which was more like eight courses since every course included two dishes! Thai goat curry. Grilled Wagyu beef wrapped in gem lettuce and carrot kimchi. Coos Bay silver point oysters. Watermelon radish carpaccio. Seared ahi tuna. And so much more. Dessert was over the top with three options for everyone.

The menu (front and back) from Chef Alan’s celebration dinner at Farmhouse

Just like the first Farm to Table dinner I attended, white linen tablecloths and family-style seating and serving plates abounded. The simplicity of the décor was magical. The Farmhouse overlooks the entire Roger’s Gardens property, so it felt like we were in a forest.

Photo: OC Weekly: Vegetable carpaccio

What I learned most about the Farm to Table experience is that it is all about the food and the farms and ranches it comes from. The location, ambience, and décor all contribute to telling the story, connecting you to the foods you eat and the people who lovingly produce them.

And it couldn’t get more farm-to-table than dining al fresco with trees as your awning and a cool evening breeze as your soundtrack.

Even though a Farm to Table dinner might have a heftier price tag than a conventional dinner at a restaurant, and it might take a few hours from start to finish, I would encourage you to put the experience on your bucket list. It certainly made me slow my pace and take in the entire experience.

Bon appetit!

KarenSave

It all started when I gave a speech last month to a group of local women entrepreneurs. Whenever I speak to an all-female group, I feel comfortable sharing one of my “secret weapons,” as women seem super-interested and open to it.

And that is my color palette.

I’ve written before about how I have been working with a colorist since the early 1980s. Jennifer Butler’s expertise is in helping people look their best by wearing the colors, patterns, and textures that make that person look their best. In her studio in Los Angeles, she has more than 10,000 color swatches that she uses to select the perfect colors and textures to match a client’s eye color, hair color and texture, and skin tone.

Over the years she has also added the dimensions of personality and energy to her color consultation, which give insight to her clients about their season. (In personal color analysis, people are often assigned a “seasonal” color palette, meaning a particular group of colors related to that season.)

For the last seven years (since I last had my color palette done), I’ve been a “Tawny Spring.”

So, after my speech, I thought it might be a good time to revisit Jennifer to see if there have been any changes to my color palette. That Saturday morning as I was getting ready to drive to her house, I had second thoughts. Maybe there was no reason to see her. I was certain that there really hadn’t been any major changes in my coloring. But I did have a gnawing feeling about the fact that during the past couple of months, each time I went shopping and tried on colors and styles that were on my palette, they no longer felt good to me.

So I walked into Jennifer’s house a few minutes before our consultation. She was just concluding a workshop with other clients, but I saw her when I walked in and smiled at her. I could tell from the look on her face that she didn’t recognize me. Once I said my name, she caught herself and said, “Welcome.” After we chatted for a few minutes, we moved into her studio. That’s when she shocked me.

“Karen, you have become a Summer,” she said. “And actually I did not recognize you―you have changed so much.”

Now that may not sound like a big deal, but when you have been dressing like an energetic, cheerleader-type Spring for a long time, hearing that you are now a “twilight, full of grace” Summer is quite a shock.

For the next three hours, I watched Jennifer select an almost completely different color palette for me. My eyes had darkened. My skin was pinker. She encouraged me to darken my hair back to its original color, so it would complement my skin and eyes.

Here is my former palette, when I was a Spring. You can see that the colors are brighter.

Here is my new, Rose-Bronze Summer palette.

As she selected my new colors, Jennifer noticed a few hairs around my face were a bit curly and asked me about that. That’s when I reminded her that I have naturally curly hair, but have been straightening it and blow-drying it straight for more than 30 years. I told her that when I was a young girl, people made fun of my curly hair; they called me names. There were no happy memories associated with curly hair.

That’s when she made a life-changing comment: “It seems that you are in a period of personal transformation and authenticity. Perhaps you might want to consider wearing your hair natural.” That was a pretty heavy thing to hear. But since my divorce was final seven months ago, I’ve felt like I’ve been in a period of self-reflection. And I could not get the thought out of my head about what it would be like to be the real me. Curly hair and all.

So, I took a deep breath on Monday morning and went to work with my naturally curly hair, dressed in colors from my new palette. People in the office did not recognize me. They asked me what I did to my hair; my answer was “Nothing. This is my natural hair!”

As a matter of fact, since all three of our summer interns have naturally curly hair, we had a Curly Hair Day in the office. It was empowering for all of us as we gathered for our photo!

It’s been more than two weeks now since I decided to be me. The real me. The authentic me.

I’ve had friends comment: “You look fantastic, happy, and like a different person.” Other friends, when they see me, say nothing. (I think they are in shock that I have dared to go natural.) Just this morning, several of my work colleagues commented that I look so happy, thinner (that was a plus!), and more calm, like a totally different person.

Are you asking yourself, “Am I wearing the colors and styles that make me look my best?” Or are you thinking, “I can’t afford to have my colors done. I’ll have to get rid of so many of my clothes.” I encourage you to check out the videos, before-and-after photos, and information on Jennifer’s website.

While it can be scary to buck fashion trends and peer pressure, finding out what your palette is and dressing accordingly can be an amazing thing for your self-esteem, your personal confidence, and for your success in your career and personal life. Being authentic in how you present yourself makes a phenomenal difference.

Left: Me, dressed as a Spring, being someone who I am no longer. Right: Me, dressed as a Summer, my authentic self.

Karen

OK, we’ve all read about the solar eclipse coming up on Monday, August 21. It will be the first time in 26 years that a total solar eclipse has been visible from the United States.

Many people are flocking to Portland, Jackson Hole, and St. Louis to experience the moments of daytime darkness in person. For me, I know I can view it online, and that will suffice.

What’s really on my mind is to share some insight I’ve gotten into why so many people, including some heads of state in particular, are acting so darned weird right now.

Here is the context, thanks to Gahl Sasson of Cosmic Navigator, a good friend of mine:

A lunar eclipse, the most recent of which happened on August 7 in Aquarius, is kind of like an Old Testament version of Valentine’s Day. It’s a great day to spend with friends and lovers. It’s also the time to end a relationship that isn’t working and to say goodbye to a personality trait in yourself that you don’t want anymore. “Overall, since it is an eclipse and lunar, you might feel [overly] sensitive